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Jeonghan never thinks of reading as a hobby. In fact, could never even imagine himself and an over 500-pages book in the same sentence. Yet here he is, in the living room with Mr. Jeon Wonwoo, pouring his heart out while holding the thick yellowish young adult novel in his arm.
"I feel like Penny is, in some way, in love with Simon, and I’m Penny, to be honest, not that I love Simon or I am Penny literally. Just that I could be Penny and in love with someone who constantly and unintentionally reminds the world he's in love with somebody else. "
"So, you are in love with someone who constantly reminds the world he's in love with someone else"
"I didn't say that"
Wonwoo pulls out his signature unreadable smile while staring at Jeonghan's face. Jeonghan likes to think that he is so good at hiding his feelings because he is good at games. He always wins through those shameless tricks. Cheating and hiding are two different things, though. Plus, one can never cheat on one own feelings. That is why Yoon Jeonghan has an invisible tattoo that read 'Kim Mingyu, love me back' on his forehead.
"Well, then. I'd like to have my book back"
"No problem. Thank you for lending me" Jeonghan hands Carry On back to its rightful owner.
"I am so happy you like it, hyung"
"You'll be much happier if Soonyoung likes it too, wouldn't you?"
"I don't understand"
"You forget to take your love letter out"
Jeonghan only read the book Wonwoo suggested because he ran out of random things to do on holiday. This means he will have more time to himself which also means he would has this thought about this tall kid wandering in and out of the dorm. Lead to him thinking about what seems to be a single-sided love life, which is more than annoying. He'd rather be dazed by someone else's story than thinking of his own.
Jeonghan always thinks that Mingyu likes one of the members in the team. His top prediction are Wonwoo (has denied by sending a powerpoint titled "that is bullshit"), Soonyoung (rejects several times), Seungkwan (imitates puking when he knows) and Seungcheol (dumbfounded, asked 'is he?'). Recently Jeonghan has altered his assumption, maybe it's a secret character.
Wonwoo, on the other hand, doesn't understand Jeonghan's terrible assumption. The only thing Mingyu could keep a secret is his favorite boxer color, which, as Seungcheol had announced, is red. That means there is nothing in Mingyu´s life that can stay unfolded. His eyes speak so much, his words, his action. He literally serves his feelings for dinner.
Many wonder how has the two not develop any progress in the relationship, not even start it. Wonwoo, the love expert offers an explanation.
Well, Jeonghan indeed has this love-me-please tattooed on his forehead but it seems like Mingyu is always too tall to be in a position where he can see Jeonghan's forehead clearly. Or simply never look at his forehead since most of Jeonghan's haircut comes with a bang. Or it is just yet another tragic unreasonably lengthy love story.
****
They haven´t met all week. Mingyu has been busy with schedule just like a rising star that he is. Jeonghan's happy when he sees Mingyu's shy-but-proud smile that contrasts the younger's growing body. Maybe he has been waiting for Sunday to come, so that he can do the congratulation-hug which consists of 'congratulation, your hard works pay off. you did well!' and 'congratulation to me, now we're hugging '
Jeonghan is rather happy seeing his brother grows. Even if it means they will have to grow apart too, a bit. It'd be just a bit in Jeonghan's mind. Right, They will always find ways back to their old conversation.
Back at the balcony
"Hyung, you got a feather in your hair"
Jeonghan almost jumps when he heard the newcomer. Mingyu supposes to be sleeping taken that he has been working all day and must be tired. The younger took a seat next to Jeonghan's. Place two mugs and a shopping bag from a convenience store on the table.
"Not strange. There´s a bunch of birds in heaven. Surely some of them miss me when I fell" he answers
"Haha. Very not funny. Stay still okay? I'll take it out for you"
"No need to" Mingyu just ignores that, goes ahead and plucks the feather out of the older's hair, recognizes how soft his hair was, even compared to the feature.
Well, not really. Actually if he has to be honest, It wasn't as soft as it used to be. But it still gives familiar sensation, as well as that same heartfelt effect that had been discreetly activated years ago.
Jeonghan takes a hundred note on how incredibly tender Mingyu's hands can be despite their strongness.
This kid used to go around fixing people's hair, Jeonghan remembered secretly waiting for his turn. Mingyu remembered doing all the fixing just to cover up his real target.
The little detail sinks in their heads and sinks in silent.
When Jeonghan pat on Mingyu´s back softly, indicate that he´s about to leave, Mingyu pours soju and beer together in a mug and offers him.
Jeonghan, for the love of free drink, sits back.
"Why are you staying up this late"
"Thinking"
"of?"
"many things"
"want to share?"
"I--" can't, because it was about you "just nonsense stuff"
"I like nonsense stuff"
"I don't know how to say it. Anyway, how's work?"
"Nice"
"Great"
"I think I'm one of the birds in your fake heaven. The one that misses you when you fell"
It took Jeonghan three full minutes to come up with a response.
"Oh, That might have happened to me too"
"What? Being a bird"
"Miss you, stupid"
"Wouldn't it make you even more stupid to miss a stupid person"
"I am already quite dumb, you see"
"No, you're not."
"I am"
"Maybe just a bit"
"Maybe moderately"
"Nah, hyung, don't believe the thing you tell yourself so late at night"
"I can agree. Don't believe anything this late at night"
Said night, along with the silence that accompanies it, is getting longer. They both lost in their own world. Thinking about this and that. Not drunk but not completely sober. Jeonghan finishes his drink at last and pushes the silence away.
"Who do you like most in Hip-hop Team?"
"Hip-hop? I like me"
"Except yourself"
"Just don't make me choose. I'm not Lee Chan. And you know I can't choose!"
"What about Vocal Team?"
"Joshua hyung"
"You can't like Joshua, he's my best friend!"
"What are you? Elementary kids? Nobody can like my best friend because I like him best?"
Jeonghan pouts.
Beer, to make the matter worse, beer and pouts, often makes Mingyu overreact. He can see himself lean in for a big kiss. No exact reason. Just skips all the steps. No foreshadow. No warning. No inciting incident. Just alcohol, or the fact that they haven't seen each other for a week straight. Perhaps it's that stupid romance book he borrowed from Wonwoo many months ago too, or because he starts to believe that everything that happens after midnight will not have consequences.
Might even be the fact that this is the first time Jeonghan says "I miss you" back , twice even, in the same night.
In the real world, he does lean but it happens painfully slowly. Jeonghan does not turn away, so the result is pretty much the same.
Mingyu stops when he can feel the older's breath.
Half an inch away from a kiss. Both of them freeze.
Yoon Jeonghan, handsome, sleepy and desperately in love, reaches for the hand, thinking to himself, let'is gei it Jeonghan, If you don't fuck it up today, then when?
Mingyu's always faster though. He ends up delivered a chaste peck, a small kiss big enough to make a pop sound both in reality and in the older's head. The temperature immediately goes up.
As soon as their lips part, Mingyu hides his face of embarrassment in Jeonghan's shoulder.
Jeonghan's fake laugh was interrupted by his own hiccup when Mingyu holds his hand. With his head still on the other's shoulder, the younger then guides that hand to his own chest, place it firmly.
Jeonghan wants to run if possible.
And it doesn't get better when Mingyu says "It's late at night, I know. But you should believe this one"
Maybe he didn't fall from heaven. This may sounds as if he loses his mind, but what if he is in one?
If not, then would heaven have a giant kid that let you feel his pulse so sincerely, even when it's beating like a racing car? There would be one, right? How could it be heaven otherwise?