Chapter Text
“But…”
Gabriel’s father held up a finger and Gabriel closed his mouth abruptly.
“No buts,” Charles Milton said. “You’re going and that’s final.”
Gabriel looked at his mother but she refused to meet his eyes, focusing on her hands in her lap.
“You leave tomorrow,” Gabriel’s father said. The conversation was clearly over.
Gabriel stood up and headed for the stairs.
“Where are you going?” his father called.
“To pack,” Gabriel snapped. “Unless that part’s something I have no control over either?” He waited but Charles said nothing, so Gabriel took the stairs two at a time, hurling himself into his bedroom and leaning back against the closed door. He knew better than to slam his door; he didn’t need that kind of wrath rained down on him when he was already so close to the edge.
Pushing away, Gabriel crossed his room and collapsed onto his bed facedown. Maybe if he concentrated hard enough, he could shift realities and end up in a family that loved him for who he was, not who they wanted him to be.
A tentative knock sounded on the door.
“Go away!” Gabriel shouted into his pillow.
“It’s me,” Castiel said.
Gabriel sat up. “Oh. In that case, close the door behind you.”
Castiel slipped inside and obeyed, shutting it silently. He surveyed Gabriel for a moment, brow furrowed and dark blue eyes creased in concern.
“Why do you antagonize him?” he asked.
Gabriel rolled his eyes. “This is not my fault, little brother.”
“But you know what he’s like,” Castiel insisted. “You know he will never stop insisting you change. So why do you fight him so hard?”
“Because I can’t change, Cas!” Gabriel snapped. He collapsed backward onto his pillows and stared up at the ceiling. “I can’t change. I didn’t ask to be gay. You think I wanted this?”
Castiel sat down on the bed next to him and took his hand. “You’re more like him than you realize,” he said.
Gabriel yanked his hand away. “I am nothing like him,” he hissed.
“You’re stubborn, you’re proud, you’re terrifyingly intelligent. You’re gifted in ways that I can only dream about. You’ll fight to the death for what you believe. You are like our father, whether you recognize that or not.”
“Except I’m not a bigot or a homophobe,” Gabriel said. He covered his face. “Why won’t he love me, Cas? Why am I never good enough the way I am?”
Castiel sighed. “He sees potential for greatness in you. His methods are wrong but he is trying to help you realize that potential.”
Gabriel glared at him through his fingers. “I can be great and gay, you know. Bitch, I can be fabulous.”
Castiel’s lips twitched. “I have no doubt of it.”
“Will you write to me while I’m at the camp?” Gabriel asked.
“Of course,” Castiel said immediately. “Every day, if you want.”
“That’d be good,” Gabriel said. “I’m going to hate every single minute of this.”
He was wrong, though. For one thing, the campgrounds themselves were a pleasant surprise. Nestled deep in the piney woods, the main lodge was a huge, sprawling log cabin, with smaller cabins for the campers scattered around it in a rough half-circle. Behind the lodge were the volleyball courts, a mini-golf course, hiking trails, and the camp’s small stable. Gabriel perked up at that. He liked horses. Maybe he could help out at the stable.
The group of boys piled off the bus in a rush and then milled in a circle, unsure what to do.
An older man with deep sunken eyes and a petulant set to his mouth stepped forward and clapped his hands sharply. “Welcome to Whispering Pines!” he said.
Gabriel stifled a snort. Original name.
“My name is Zachariah,” the man continued, “And I am the head counselor here. If you have any questions or concerns, you may bring them directly to me, or to any of the staff. We’re going to get you settled into your cabins, and then you may have the afternoon off to explore the facility.”
Gabriel raised his hand and Zachariah nodded at him.
“What if someone doesn’t want to be here and they try to run away?”
Zachariah smiled and Gabriel squashed the urge to slap the condescension right off his smug face. “We are thirty miles from the nearest city. Our closest neighbor is ten miles through the forest in the opposite direction from town. The highway is under a strict No Hitchhikers policy, and any teens found on that road will be returned here immediately by the police.”
He tilted his head, narrowing his eyes to stare at Gabriel. “Running away would be…ill-advised.”
A chill skittered down Gabriel’s spine and he swallowed hard as Zachariah turned back to the group and continued to tell them about the camp. The Asian boy to his left shifted nervously and Gabriel glanced at him.
“You just pissed off the leader of the uber-religious prison camp, dude,” the boy whispered. “Probably not the smartest move.” He pushed dense black hair off his forehead. “I’m Kevin.”
“Gabriel Milton,” Gabriel said, offering his hand. “Why are you here?”
Kevin snorted. “Same reason you are, I expect. Got caught kissing a boy behind the bleachers.”
“Cliché much?” Gabriel murmured, and Kevin flipped him off. Discreetly, where Zachariah couldn’t see.
Gabriel snickered. He was going to like Kevin, he could already tell. Zachariah was droning on about schedules and mealtimes. Boring. Gabriel glanced around the group of young men, inspecting his fellow inmates. A scrawny boy with ears that stuck straight out stood on his other side, his pale skin dotted with acne and freckles. Gabriel winced in sympathy. The curse of puberty.
Behind Gabriel was a boy about Castiel’s age, no more than fourteen, arms wrapped tight around his middle and an expression of abject misery on his face. Gabriel bit his lip, but before he could speak to him, the young man next to the miserable boy leaned in and spoke quietly in his ear.
The other boy looked up, startled, and Gabriel followed his eyes upward, into the face of the very tall young man. Gabriel straightened unconsciously. Oh, hello. The boy was a little younger than Gabriel, so probably sixteen or so, with shaggy brown hair that fell into bright green eyes. He smiled at the unhappy boy and then glanced up and met Gabriel’s gaze.
Gabriel smiled at him. Tall, gorgeous, and kind. Maybe this camp wasn’t going to be so bad after all.
They were sorted into two groups. Tall, kind and gorgeous was in Gabriel’s group, as well as the miserable boy, Kevin, and the skinny guy with the ears, as Gabriel had privately dubbed him. Lugging their bags behind then, they followed the counselor assigned to them, a smiling young man only a few years older than them who said his name was Brady. Gabriel instinctively disliked him on general principles; he was far too good-looking for his own good.
Gabriel was in the first cabin, as was the unhappy boy, whose name was Alfie. Their roommates were Kevin and…Gabriel did a tiny internal victory dance when he realized tall, kind and gorgeous rounded out their quartet.
Brady was explaining that each cabin was named after a book of the Bible. “This is the Psalms cabin,” he told the four young men, who did their best to look interested.
“Bet they don’t have a Song of Solomon cabin,” Gabriel muttered, and the tall boy stifled a snort of laughter. Gabriel grinned at him as Brady cleared his throat.
“Now, per regulations, I’m going to have to search your bags,” he said. “Just to make sure no contraband was brought into camp that could potentially harm your impressionable minds.”
Gabriel stomped hard on the surge of glee that rose within him when he heard that. He’d been hoping something like this would happen. If he was going to be forced to attend this stupid camp, he damn well wasn’t going without a fight. Smoothing out his face, he pulled his bag into the middle of the floor.
“You can check mine first,” he said carelessly, and flopped backwards onto the bunkbed directly behind him.
He heard Brady unzipping the bag and the rustling as he went through the toiletries – aspirin, toothbrush, hairbrush, soap. Then there was a sharp intake of breath and Gabriel smiled at the upper bunk.
Brady stood up, holding the porn magazine between thumb and forefinger as if it would contaminate him.
The other boys gasped in unison and Gabriel sat up, affecting confusion. “What’s wrong?” he asked. “That’s not against the rules, is it?”
Brady was glaring at him. “You brought pornography into the house of God,” he snarled. “This…this filth is not permitted. How dare you-” He cut himself off, taking a deep breath. “Zachariah will deal with you.” He turned on his heel and stalked out of the cabin.
A stunned silence filled the room after he left. Then the tall boy broke it with whoops of delighted laughter, collapsing onto the bed beside Gabriel and holding his ribs as he howled with glee. Gabriel grinned at him as Kevin and Alfie crowded nearer.
“I can’t believe you did that,” Kevin gasped. “You smuggled porn into a Christian camp!”
“Not just any porn,” Gabriel said. “Gay bondage porn. Hardcore shit.”
“Do you actually read that stuff?” the tall boy demanded, propping himself up on his elbows.
“Nah,” Gabriel said, smiling at him. “I was just going for maximum shock value. I’m Gabriel.” He held out his hand and the brown-haired boy took it. His hand was huge and warm and nearly enveloped Gabriel’s.
“Sam Winchester,” he said. “And you may just be my hero.”
“So what’s your sin, Sam Winchester?” Gabriel asked.
Sam shrugged, still on his elbows. “My parents are convinced I’m gay. Which means I’m going to hell, of course. So here I am.”
“Are you?” Gabriel asked. “Gay, I mean.”
Sam slanted an amused look at him. “I’m pretty sure I’m bisexual, but I’m still figuring it out.”
“You’re remarkably well-adjusted, considering you’re going to hell,” Gabriel said.
Sam snorted, amused. “There are things worth worrying about and things worth…not.”
Tall, gorgeous, kind and has his head on straight? Gabriel was pretty sure he was falling for this kid, and he’d only known him for five minutes.
The door bounced open and Zachariah stood in the doorway, a scowl on his already sour face. “Gabriel,” he snarled.
Gabriel stood up, pushing down the ball of butterflies that had suddenly erupted in his stomach.
Zachariah stalked toward him. “Brady has given me to understand that you have brought filth onto this holy ground.”
“I thought this was a cabin,” Gabriel said lightly. “Not a church.”
Zachariah’s eyes narrowed. “This entire camp has been consecrated to God’s service. The ground you stand on is holy, and it is not to be desecrated with homosexual perversions.”
“I checked the handbook,” Gabriel said. He was aware of Sam standing up next to him, shoulder to shoulder. Well…shoulder to ribcage. He had to be at least six foot three, Gabriel thought a little wildly. “There was nothing in there about not bringing reading material. I didn’t want to get bored during my downtime, is all.” He tried his best winning smile but Zachariah continued to glare.
“You are working in the stable for the next two weeks. When you are not needed at the stable or in your classes or eating meals, you are to be in your bunk. If you stay out of trouble for two weeks, we will see about reinstating some of your privileges. Report to Anna in the morning, six am sharp. She will be in charge of you during this time.”
With that, Zachariah turned on his heel and left the cabin.
“Well, that was fun,” Gabriel said. “I was expecting more whips and chains, less…horseshit. But hey, horses are cool, right?” He sat down on the bed again. “Oh, anyone care if I take this bunk?”
“Sure,” Sam said. “I’ve got the top. Alfie, you and Kevin fight it out over the other bunkbed, okay?” He grabbed his bag and began unpacking the contents into the top two drawers of the dresser next to their bed.
Gabriel watched him silently, enjoying the way Sam moved with economy and grace despite his freakishly long limbs. Kevin and Alfie were on the other side of the room, talking in quiet murmurs.
“You’re gonna be a legend around camp by tonight, you know,” Sam said, his back still turned.
Gabriel shrugged. “Not why I did it, but I’m not gonna complain with an enhanced reputation. Maybe it’ll save me a few beatings.”
“You get beat up a lot?” Sam asked, glancing over his shoulder.
“My fair share,” Gabriel said. He fell over onto his back and stared up at the bunk above him. “I’m short and mouthy and gay; I kind of beg to be picked on.”
“Not while I’m around,” Sam said, his voice fierce.
Gabriel lifted his head and stared at him. “You don’t even know me!”
“I know enough,” Sam said. “You don’t want to be here any more than I do. You’re nice to kids like Alfie and Kevin. You’re obviously a smartass, which I have a soft spot for. And you’re determined to buck the rules of this stupid place, and for that I think I may love you just a little bit. So yeah, I know enough.”
Gabriel swallowed hard and dropped his head back to the pillow. Well…shit. This kid was damn near perfect.
By the time Gabriel finished unpacking, the sun was dipping below the horizon. He walked to the door and peered outside.
“You think they’re going to give us dinner at any point?” he asked.
Sam glanced at him from his cross-legged seat on the floor, flipping through the actual books Gabriel had brought. “Hey,” he said, holding one up, “Can I borrow this?”
“Sure,” Gabriel said without looking. He closed the door and sighed. He’d been too nervous to eat lunch on the bus, and he was hungry.
A knock sounded and Gabriel yanked the door open to reveal Brady standing on the other side.
“It’s dinnertime,” Brady said.
“Finally!” Gabriel said, and turned to find his shoes.
“Not you,” Brady said.
Gabriel froze and then swiveled to face him. “What?”
Brady met his eyes steadily. “Zachariah feels it would be better for you to spend the evening fasting and meditating on your sins. You will stay here, in your cabin, and you will pray for forgiveness. If you are properly penitent in the morning, you may have breakfast with the rest of the campers.”
Sam uncoiled his long legs and stood up. “That’s not fair!” he said.
“Nevertheless,” Brady said, “It’s how things are. Now, Kevin, Alfie, Sam…get your shoes and let’s go. I will show you where the dining hall is and in the future you will be expected to be there on time.”
Sam crossed his arms, a mulish set to his jaw. “No.”
Brady lifted an eyebrow. “No?”
“If Gabe can’t eat, I’m not eating either.”
Gabriel gulped. He wasn’t going to be responsible for getting Sam in trouble. “It’s okay,” he said to the taller boy. “I had a big lunch. I’ll be fine. You go on.”
Sam shot him a disbelieving look and refused to move.
Brady was glowering in the doorway, snapping orders at Kevin and Alfie, who were scrambling to get their shoes on and get out the door without looking at Gabriel.
Gabriel took a chance and rested his hand on Sam’s forearm. “Listen,” he said urgently. “Don’t do this. One skipped meal won’t kill me. Please, Sam, just go. Please?”
Sam hesitated, swinging his gaze between Brady and Gabriel. Brady ushered the two younger boys out of the cabin and Gabriel pulled his hand back before Brady noticed them touching.
“Are you sure?” Sam asked quietly.
Gabriel nodded, smiling up at him. “I’m sure,” he said. “I’ll be fine. I’ll see you after dinner, yeah?”
Sam ran a hand through his hair and sighed. “Okay.” He followed Brady out of the cabin with a quick look over his shoulder.
Gabriel waved goodbye and then sat down hard in the middle of the floor. His stomach growled and Gabriel wrapped his arms around his waist. “You’ll live, now shut up,” he snarled. God, he already hated Brady and Zachariah.
He flopped over backwards, arms and legs splayed in all directions like a starfish in the middle of the cabin floor, and groaned at the ceiling. Shaking up the status quo was all well and good, but it didn’t put food in his increasingly unhappy stomach.
Gabriel sighed and closed his eyes. He needed to write to Cas, tell him about his first day. Of course, they probably censored the letters, which meant Gabriel would have to be very careful in what he said. He began to mentally compose the letter, fingers twitching as he wrote it in his mind, and it wasn’t long before he dozed off.
He was still asleep on the floor when Sam came back.
“Gabe? Gabriel, wake up!”
There was a hand on his shoulder and Gabriel groaned, rolling away in protest. “Five more minutes, Mom.”
“I’ll make it worth your while if you’ll wake up,” a voice said in his ear, and warm breath tickled Gabriel’s cheek. His eyes snapped open. That was not his mother’s voice.
He turned his head and – oh. Sam was right there, almost nose to nose with him, crouched on the floor. This close, Gabriel could see that there was a ring of gold inside the vivid green of Sam’s eyes, and he swallowed hard.
Sam smiled and Gabriel caught his breath, sitting up and groaning a bit as his muscles protested.
“You okay?” Sam asked.
“Stupid place to sleep,” Gabriel admitted. “My back may never forgive me. What did you mean, you’d make it worth my while?”
“Oh, you heard that, did you?” Sam asked, lips twitching. He began to unbutton his shirt and Gabriel’s eyes went wide.
“What are you doing?” he hissed, scrambling to his knees.
“Feeding you,” Sam said as he pulled a napkin-wrapped package from under his t-shirt and held it out. “Almost everyone wanted to chip in a bit. They all heard about the skin mag and you’re pretty much a god already.”
Gabriel opened the napkins and stared at the food in his lap. There were several thick slabs of roast beef between slices of crusty homemade bread, a whole baked potato, a wedge of some kind of cheese, and…Gabriel unwrapped the small triangle and stared in disbelief at the apple pie within.
He looked up at Sam, who grinned at him.
“You…I could kiss you,” Gabriel said fervently. He scooped up the sandwich and sank his teeth into it, moaning in bliss. “Dear sweet merciful Creator, that’s the best thing I’ve ever had in my mouth.”
Sam stood up hastily and Gabriel blinked up at him. “Okay there?”
Sam nodded, clearing his throat. “Just…making sure no one’s coming. You hurry up and eat so we can get rid of the evidence.”
Gabriel nodded and turned his attention to the food, devouring it as quickly as possible. When he was done, he licked his fingers clean and sighed.
“That was amazing,” he said, balling up the napkins. Sam held out his hand and Gabriel deposited the wad into it, smiling at him. “Thank you. Seriously, Sam. You could’ve gotten in a lot of trouble doing that.”
Sam closed his hand around the napkins, fingers brushing against Gabriel’s. “You’d have done the same for me, I’ll bet,” he said. “I’m going to go flush these. I don’t know how thoroughly they check the cabins but I think it’s best we don’t take chances.”
Gabriel watched him disappear into the darkness, heading for the communal bathrooms, and took a deep breath. Maybe this camp wasn’t going to be the worst thing that had ever happened to him after all.