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“This is really small. I don’t like it.”
Steve held in a sigh as he carried his and Wanda’s bags through the door. A quick glance around told him that Wanda wasn’t completely off-base by calling the apartment small. It had one bedroom, a kitchenette, a small living room, and what looked like a cramped bathroom that had exactly enough space for a toilet and a stand-up shower. All in all, the whole apartment was roughly the size of Steve’s bedroom back at the tower.
“It’s not that bad,” Steve said, forcing a small amount of cheer into his voice. The truth was, the apartment wasn’t great. But SHIELD, meaning Fury, had been kind enough to let them stay here in the first place when they could’ve easily said no.
Just the thought of trying to find an affordable apartment in New York City made Steve’s head hurt. He wasn’t poor by any stretch of the word, but the income he earned from working with the Avengers was modest. It would probably take just about all of it to rent a place in Manhattan, if not more. Especially if he looked for a place with Wanda’s high standards in mind. The back pay he’d accrued from the army could easily be gone in a matter of months, and now that they didn’t have Tony’s support, he couldn’t afford to let that happen.
At least with SHIELD, the rent was highly subsidized. Fury had told Steve that they could even stay for free if Steve were willing to teach some classes to SHIELD agents. Steve wasn’t sure about that yet, but he hadn’t turned the offer down. It was hard to say how long it would be until they were allowed to go back to the tower, and he wasn’t overly familiar with how much life cost in the twenty-first century, but he suspected it was a lot.
Wanda pouted, crossing her arms over her chest. “I don’t like it, Daddy,” she repeated, her voice high and girlish. “Why can’t we go home?”
“You know why,” Steve said. He took their bags into the bedroom and realized that they didn’t even have a window. It made the apartment seem stifling. He immediately began to miss the floor-to-ceiling windows that his floor had in the tower.
“Because Tony and Bucky are being mean, stupid, dumb-heads,” Wanda said.
Steve turned, about to admonish her for her language, and paused when he noticed that she was crying. His heart went out to her. It was never fun being punished for a mistake, and Wanda was so young at heart. Her headspace tended to fall somewhere around four to five years old. She’d been the youngest Little at the tower by about a year until everyone found about Tony. He privately thought that had probably contributed to Wanda’s jealousy.
“Don’t cry, Sweetheart. Everything will turn out okay. We won’t be here very long, you’ll see,” Steve said soothingly, walking over to her and wrapping her up into a big hug. Hugging Wanda always made him feel both powerful and strong. It made him understand why Bucky had been so smothering back in the day. There was nothing like having someone tiny and fragile depending on you to make you feel like you could take on the world alone. It was definitely addictive.
“I just wanna go home,” she sobbed.
“I know you do. Shh,” Steve said, running his hand up and down her back. Being kicked out and having to go somewhere else would’ve upset any Little, he reasoned. It made sense that Wanda was stressed out right now. It hadn’t helped that so many of the SHIELD agents they’d encountered had treated Wanda warily, as though she was a bomb that was going to go off at any moment. Wanda hated that.
He lifted her up into his arms, loving the way she instantly cuddled into him and rested her head on his shoulder. As he comforted her, he looked around the bedroom. It was tiny. Not big enough for them to share by any stretch: there was a double bed, a small dresser, and not much else. He held in a sigh, realizing that Wanda would end up with the bed and he’d have to make do with the couch. She would throw an even bigger fit if he told her she couldn’t have the bed.
He held her for so long that Wanda ended up falling asleep. Steve gently laid her down on the bed and pulled the scratchy, SHIELD-regulated blanket up over her. She made a peaceful picture, long red hair spread out over the pillows as she breathed deeply and evenly. He stood there for a moment, just watching it. Before finding Bucky, Wanda had been his reason for continuing on.
She, and the people like her, were why Steve did what he did. The innocent people. The people who had been taken in by Hydra. The people who had unduly suffered because of the actions of the others. The people that Steve wanted to protect. Wanda represented all of them. Sure, she’d made some mistakes. Everyone did. Did that mean she was supposed to be vilified for them forever?
It was frustrating to know that he’d failed her. He was convinced that if he could’ve explained Wanda’s actions better, Bucky would’ve understood that she wasn’t really after Tony and then Bucky wouldn’t have overreacted the way that he did. Wanda was just… she was a kid. She was a Little. She didn’t always think before she did things, but that didn’t make her dangerous!
Steve sighed to himself and left the room, realizing that there was no door to the bedroom. He had to be very quiet as he unpacked their bags. What he’d brought was only a small fraction of their things, mostly clothing and a few toys for Wanda to occupy her time with. As he looked at the meagre collection, it occurred to him that he hadn’t brought any food.
“Goddamnit,” he swore under his breath, suddenly furious. The tower was their home. What right did Bucky have to kick them out like that? Why couldn’t Bucky understand that Steve had made a commitment to Wanda? He had a responsibility to her. He was her daddy!
He cast a look at Wanda again. If this were the tower, he could leave her sleeping and ask JARVIS to keep an eye on her. Or he could ask Laura, Clint or even Natasha, if she was feeling big, to watch her. Then he could go throw some punches at the gym. Here, there was no one to baby-sit. He had the feeling Fury wouldn’t be very happy if Steve went around asking SHIELD agents to look after Wanda.
And frankly even if he could find someone to baby-sit, he didn’t know how well the gym equipment would be able to stand up to him. Tony had specially built every piece of equipment that the tower had, designing them to stand up to the force of whatever Bucky or Steve threw at them. Regular punching bags only stood up to one punch, maybe two on a good day, before exploding everywhere.
It was very unlikely that SHIELD’s punching bags were anything close to the ones at the tower.
“This fucking sucks,” Steve muttered, roughly setting his bag down on the table. The noise it made jerked Wanda out of her sleep.
“Daddy?” she cried out, sitting upright.
“I’m here,” Steve said, rushing to her side and inwardly cursing himself. Wanda loved to sleep and didn’t usually take kindly to being woken up prematurely.
“I thought maybe it was just a bad dream,” Wanda said with a pout, rubbing at her eyes.
Steve sat awkwardly on the edge of the bed – it was uncomfortable with how the bed was positioned so close to the wall, but he tried to ignore it – and patted her knee. “I’m afraid not.”
Wanda’s scowl deepened. “This is all Stark’s fault!” she declared with a vehemence that surprised Steve.
“Now Wanda, that’s not exactly fair,” Steve said as delicately as he could.
“What? What do you mean?” Wanda looked at him with a betrayed expression.
“I just… you know you’re not supposed to use your powers on members of the team,” Steve told her.
“But I didn’t mean to,” Wanda said.
“I… I know,” Steve said, sighing. He wasn’t sure how to explain this to her. After all, if she hadn’t meant to do it, it wasn’t exactly fair to blame her for it, was it?
“I was just trying to help,” Wanda added, her chin quivering. “I thought everything would be better if Stark wasn’t around.”
“You need to stop thinking that way. Not everything is Tony’s fault,” Steve said, though the words rang false even to his own ears. It hadn’t been that long ago when Steve had been eyeing Tony with a lot of suspicion, always wondering why Bucky and Tony were spending time together. In retrospect, it hurt that Bucky hadn’t told him the truth from day one. Maybe if Steve had known Tony had a justified reason for spending time with Bucky, Steve wouldn’t have had to be so worried.
“Do you hate me?” Wanda asked, tears forming in her eyes.
“Do I – oh sweetie, of course not.” Steve gathered her up in a hug and rocked her back and forth. “It’s not your fault. It’s just… just a misunderstanding, that’s all. Everything will be okay. Bucky will come to his senses. You’ll see.”
“I could always change their minds,” Wanda said hesitantly, and Steve froze. She tensed, as though realizing she might have said something wrong.
“No, Wanda. You can’t do that,” he said after a moment, and she nodded like she understood.
But suddenly, Steve wasn’t so sure that she did. And he had no idea what to do about it.