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Busting tables and cleaning up after drunks became his life after everything. The late nights at the bar and the later nights staying up until dawn spread through his windows became the norm. Insomnia was a welcomed friend when he tossed and turned in his bed. Booze would be the only thing to lull him to sleep, dreams of her plagued him, not being able to drink her away. No amount of alcohol could erase what they had been through together. A guitar sat in the corner of his room, dust collecting on it, her delicate hands the last piece of human interaction is received. Music fluttered to him every once in a while, slipping through the loud chatter that consumed the small space, bits, and pieces of rock songs, many that he listened to with her, reached his ears, bring back heart-wrenching memories. It has been years since she had left, but to him, a part of his heart had died that day when he found the note, I’m Sorry, the only explanation she left behind. Trying to block out the music for once, he continued to bust tables. Something stirred in him, a sixth sense you could say, which caused him to look up at the exact moment she walked into the dive bar. His heart dropped. She looked the same as the day she left, acting as if everything was perfectly fine at breakfast, never leading on the idea that she wouldn’t be home when he got back from work. Same bright red hair, vibrant green eyes emphasized by the fields of freckles that dotted her face. She carried herself differently than before through like she’s hiding parts of herself that she used to put on a show to the world, the wild, middle finger to the world, fuck you and your opinions of my attitude. She carried herself as she cared about the way people looked at her now, nothing like the girl that had left him. So close to being the same, but so far away at the same time.
Speak of the devil
Look who just walked into the room
The guilted and faded
Notion of someone I once knew.
All the perfect moments are wrong
All the precious pieces are gone
Everything that mattered is just
A city of dust
Covering both of us
His eyes never left her as she made her way to the bar stools. He threw his towel over his shoulder and quickly made his way over to the counter. She fiddled with her hands, something that stayed the same after all this time.
“Gin?” his voice called over the music that seemed to grow louder as he approached her. Her head popped up from being focused on the bar top to meet his eyes as he stood across from her. “Morgan?” She looked fatigued like she had slept just as much as he had in the past three years. What surprised Morgan was the lack of shock on her face when she saw him. She knew he worked here. That was the only option. “It’s been a while,” Morgan said, dropping the towel from his shoulder to the countertop, whipping a smudge that wasn’t there to busy his hands. “Three years. Give or take three days.” She replied. Questions flooded his mind at that point, the shock of seeing her again clearing up from his mind.
Why did you leave?
What did I do?
Are you happy now?
Without me?
Where did you go?
Is there someone else?
They’ll never know you like I do.
As the lights from the dancefloor silhouetted her form, memories of waking up to her beside him in bed filled his mind, her soul often matching the yellow that flashed over her now.
Did you hide yourself away?
I can't see you anymore
Did you eclipse another day?
I used to wake up to the color of your soul
Did you hide yourself away?
Are you living through the ghost?
Did you finally find a place
Above the shadows so the world will never know?
The world will never know you like I do
“Why?” slipped out as he stared at her, grief-filled the green orbs that looked so tried.
“Nanny passed away.” Came as a whisper from her.
“When?” He asked.
“A year ago. I left when I got news of her diagnoses. I couldn’t put you through that with me. Not after we just got you back to yourself again.” Words began to tumble out of her mouth. ”I had to spend time with her before she was gone and I didn’t want to pull you away from your music, I couldn’t ask that of you.” Little did she know; her leaving had taken his passion with her. “I thought that disappearing for a while would be the best option for both of us, you to focus on your music and me to grieve and not let my emotions pour over into you, but I was wrong. When Nanny passed it hurt more than I could have imagined. I wanted you there with me more than anything, but I couldn’t do that to you. Your father’s death nearly killed you and I couldn’t let you drift back into that mindset.” Her leaving took his motivation to live away. “When I knew I made a mistake, it was too late. Two years had passed, and I never wrote you a letter since the day I left. No explanation, nothing. I was scared to come back and have you in the arms of another girl. So, I stayed away, until I couldn’t.”
Her words would take a while to set in. Nanny had passed away. She shut him out. She forced his doors open when she had met him after his dad passed away, but she ran away from him when he could have been there for. He was hurt, but he understood why her actions made sense to her, God knows he did things while he was grieving that he wasn’t proud of. She was back though; his light was back in his life after so long of never-ending darkness. No matter what she came in here telling him, if she asked him to take her back, he would in a heartbeat because she was his heartbeat. “Can I visit her grave?” He asked. He wanted to pay his respects to her, she was a good woman who raised her granddaughter into a beautiful soul. Tears formed in Ginger’s eyes as she took in the waves of emotions that flooded over her, “Yeah, she’s back with her parents in Savannah, so it’s a drive from here.” Morgan grabbed a glass from the shelf, filled it with ice and her cherry coke that sat behind the bar, waiting for its owner to come home, and placed the drink down in front of her, “Well, looks like a need a navigator for my road trip, got any ideas for the position?” The tears then fell over the brim of her eyes at that moment, he forgave her. She picked her drink up and held it, fiddling with the straw now, “I think I have someone in mind. I think you two have a lot to catch up on.” A slight smile formed in the corner of her mouth as she took a sip of her cherry coke, a full out grin broke through his face, an unfamiliar sight in that bar for the past three years.