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‘... a volunteer for the White Heron Cup, so if you are willing, please approach me after class,’ Byleth concluded plainly, closing her books as the lunch bell tolled. Dimitri looked surreptitiously from side to side as the Blue Lions tittered, trying to ignore the pang in his chest as Sylvain - of course it had to be Sylvain - stood with an easy smile, sauntering straight to their professor’s desk.
‘You know you can count on me, right, Professor?’ The redhead proudly touched his thumb to chest. ‘I’m ready and willing to dance with a beautiful lady such as yourself anytime.’
Dimitri swore that her gaze flickered to his own for a brief moment, mouth twitching with small amusement. ‘Thank you, Sylvain, but you know that the competition is done without a partner, right?’
‘That I do. I’m talking about after I win,’ Sylvain challenged, grinning. ‘You’ll let me dance with you then, right?’
‘Well... I suppose it wouldn’t do any harm.’ Byleth almost looked relieved. ‘That was easy. Thank you for volunteering, Sylvain.’
Ingrid rolled her eyes as Sylvain gleefully bowed. ‘Professor, I hope you know what you’ve gotten yourself into.’
‘Would it be alright to approach you if we believed we had greater odds at winning?’ A deep voice resonated through the classroom. Dimitri’s eyes widened. Dedue?
Felix looked downright irritated. ‘Can’t we discuss this later? You know, after lunch?’
‘I suppose if you felt that strongly about it…’ The professor tilted her head into her hand, her trademark thinking pose. ‘Come and speak to me whenever you’re ready.’
Dimitri’s cheeks flushed hotly as Dedue flashed him an understanding smile; curses, he knows. Then again, judging by the way Mercedes and Annette were also whispering and quietly giggling, everyone knew. Everyone except the one person he had only recently begun to realise he so greatly desired.
Damn it. He didn’t want to dance - at all - but he would if it meant his beautiful professor would look his way.
***
It began at dusk.
A horrible screeching noise echoed down the hallway of the dormitory, enough to make one’s skin curl - the kind of sound that could permeate into anything and everything. After several complainants reached his room and begged for Dimitri to do something, anything to make it stop, the poor Blaiddyd boy unplugged his ears, gritted his teeth and marched crossly to the deafening source of the sound.
It took five, six, ten knocks with enough brute strength to dent the wood before Sylvain jauntily arrived to answer.
‘...What are you doing?’ Dimitri asked dryly, staring at the situation in the Gautier’s room. There was a girl that he did not recognise sitting shyly in the corner, violin in hand; Sylvain had formed a square perimeter made of books and had knocked a small pile over whilst opening the door.
‘Oh, you know,’ his friend replied, running his hand through his hair and flashing a devilish wink at the girl who blushed, ‘I guess we just got caught up, heh. What do you want, friend?’
‘There’s been a noise complaint,’ Dimitri answered brusquely, pushing into the space, ‘several, actually. Sylvain, you know that girls aren’t supposed to be in our rooms, right?’
‘Aww, but I had to practice my moves for the Professor, y’know…’ Sylvain pouted. ‘I don’t want her to be disappointed, and Harriet here was all-too willing to help me out… we’re going to be dancing together at the ball, aren’t we Harriet?’ His eyes widened at the sight of the girl packing up her violin, shaking her head angrily. ‘What are you doing, beautiful?’
‘Y-you said that you were practicing OUR dance together! For just the two of us!’
‘Well, yeah… but the Professor’s pretty important too…’ Sylvain shrugged, looking completely angelic. ‘Can’t you reconcile our differences? For our love?’
The girl stormed out of the room, knocking more books over along the way. ‘I should never have trusted you!’
‘...And thaaat’s that. Man, Dimitri, you sure have the best timing.’
Dimitri rolled his eyes, unapologetic. ‘Come now, surely you can at least find a girl that can play the violin properly. What was that? I truly felt as though my ears were about to bleed.’
Sylvain let out a big laugh, assenting. ‘Oh man, tell me about it! I just didn’t know how to let her down easy. Really, I guess I should be thanking you. But enough about me,’ his eyes glittered with interest, ‘what about you?’
‘What about me?’ The blonde boy replied dryly, hoping the sudden thrumming of his heart did not spread to his cheeks.
Sylvain smirked knowingly. ‘You’re blushing.’
‘Ugh…’ Dimitri dropped his gaze to the floor, unwilling to meet his eyes. He spotted guides to lance-work, reason and authority strewn across the oak. ‘Sylvain, you can’t tell anyone. Not even Felix. Please.’
‘Oh, please. Felix was the first to realise.’ Now it was Sylvain’s turn to roll his eyes, which then widened in horror as he spotted the ruts in his door. ‘Wow. Dude. You have got to fix my door.’
Scarlet threaded its way in earnest onto Dimitri’s face as he crossed his arms defensively. ‘Yeah… I’m sorry about that.’
‘But seriously, my friend. Tell Byl- no, Professor, that you care. When else are we going to be at our most carefree in life?’ Sylvain crossed his hands behind his head. ‘Are you going to regret it if you never say a word?’
‘B-But I - I mean, I haven’t felt this way for long, I just-’
‘You cared enough today to get annoyed that I put my hand up,’ his friend remarked bluntly, ‘matters of the heart are not bound by time.’
Dimitri made an aggrieved sound at the back of his throat. ‘I am hardly in the right place and time to confess to her. She is my teacher, after all. I cannot-’
‘-I’ll say this one more time: will you regret it?’ Sylvain cut in, looking somewhat annoyed. ‘Take it from an idiot who’s been there and done that. If tomorrow we all died and you weren’t around to protect our dear professor til the very end, would you be satisfied knowing that you had done all you could?’
‘Well… that’s a little excessive…’ Dimitri started tentatively, ignoring the sudden jolt in his chest.
No, she will never join the chorus of voices begging for death too.
I won’t allow it. I won’t.
Sylvain’s tense face smoothed, reading his friend’s expression. ‘Well, I’ve said my piece. Now if you don’t mind… I want to go to sleep.’
‘Right… thanks, Sylvain.’ The blonde-haired boy nodded slowly. ‘I’ll see you tomorrow.’
***
Dimitri never did volunteer to become the dancer for the Blue Lions House, but it was with his heart in his mouth that he invited his professor for a dance at the Garreg Mach Ball.
‘Of course, Dimitri,’ she smiled almost-knowingly, doe-eyed and the most beautiful woman he’d ever seen. He let out a relieved chuckle - a breath he didn’t even know he’d been holding - unaware of how Sylvain practically sprinted across the ballroom to the conductor of the orchestra, a smirking Claude not far behind.
All things considered, though, he had to stay understated. Suave was not exactly a word he’d use to describe himself, but damned if Dimitri wouldn’t give it his all to give Byleth the best dance she’d ever had - she was not going to be tripping on his foot tonight. Not with the amount of practice (of course, with his door carefully locked) he’d endured, humming tonelessly a tune that he’d heard from his childhood and hoping that nobody nearby could hear. As he danced with her across the room to some slow, jazzy waltz that trickled sensually across the room, he swore he heard some whistles and shut ups uttered from classmates, though even that was drowned out quickly enough - after all, Byleth was talking.
‘...It’s lovely how everyone has come together for this one night,’ she was staring thoughtfully at his face, ‘I am proud that we can stand here without differences, if only for a little while. And as the leader of the Blue Lions, you’ve played a great part in that. I thank you, Dimitri.’
He thought the way she said his name was the most beautiful thing he’d ever heard.
‘No, it’s because you’ve united us all as one…’ He hoped she would not feel how his heart was crashing against his chest so violently. ‘Professor, it’s all thanks to you.’
Much to his despair, the song ended; he frowned as that immense warmth left his grasp. Almost immediately, a swarm of women flocked around him to ask for his hand; he did not miss how his professor’s warm gaze suddenly disappeared, replaced by a wall of neutrality. As though to save him, Sylvain appeared from nowhere, winking and cheery.
‘Come now, our prince has danced pleeenty for the time being. Wouldn’t one of you ladies like to try me instead? I’m not just a pretty face, I’m a Gautier! Let me show you how we dance properly…’
Dimitri quirked his lips with amusement as the girls tittered and swarmed around the charismatic redhead instead, giving him just enough time to quickly cross the ballroom and head outside for some fresh air. It was refreshingly quiet, the breeze nipping gently across his nose and hair. He sighed, running a hand through his blonde locks. He hadn’t been able to tell her. He’d been caught up in the moment. It had been overwhelming. Lost in thoughts, he found himself trailing up the stairs to the Goddess Tower in darkness, stopping curiously as he spotted a candle down the very end of the room. It was...
‘...Professor?’ He called out tentatively, almost shyly. Despite the shadows, Dimitri made out the small slope of her shoulders, teal hair cascading down her shoulders from the bun it had just been in. She appeared to be somewhat forlorn as she turned her head to meet his gaze.
‘What are you doing here, Dimitri?’
‘I could ask you that myself,’ he replied, his steady voice coming from a place he did not know. ‘Though I suspect that we had the same motive.’
‘Hmm…’ Byleth trailed off in thought, staring off into the distance. ‘Yes, that might be possible.’
He approached slowly, sitting down at a respectable space beside her. ‘It’s… a wonderful night, is it not? For the ball,’ he quickly corrected himself, ‘it all appears to have gone quite well.’
Say it. Just say it, Dimitri.
‘Have you had a night to remember, Dimitri?’ She inquired blithely, staring at the way the shadows from the candle danced upon the wall.
Absurdly, the boy felt his eyes prickle slightly. How did this woman have enough space in her heart to care for everyone around her to this level?
Or did she only care for him this way?
‘Yes, I have…’ Dimitri focused on maintaining his regular breathing. ‘I hope you have as well.’
Byleth’s mouth quirked upward, though it may not have been discernable to anyone else. ‘I’m glad.’
They sat in companionable silence like that for a little while, the noise from the festivities below filling the void of silence. Dimitri wished that the moment could last forever - that the two of them could be like this for just a little longer, a little more, another minute…
‘...Did you know that people make wishes up here?’ Byleth asked thoughtfully, eyes to the ceiling. ‘What would you wish for, Dimitri?’
‘Well, I’m not particularly religious…’ he began slowly, ‘but I suppose I should wish for good health and prosperity across our kingdom, and that our remaining time here is filled with happiness. What about you, Professor?’
She tilted her head, pondering his words. ‘I suppose I should wish for something similar, then.’
His heart throbbed dangerously fast; Dimitri let out a breath he hadn’t even been aware of holding. ‘Although… since we’re here like this, I think it would make better sense for me to wish for us to be together forever.’
Dimitri would not, could not miss the way Byleth’s eyes widened in surprise at his words, at how her mouth widened into a small, yet adorable ‘o’ or how her cheeks darkened slightly. She did not reply immediately, though, which was time enough for the boy to panic internally at the prospect of rejection and mentally flee: ‘I’ve… I’ve become better at joking, don’t you think, Professor?’
In his deepest desires, Dimitri imagined tossing aside his feeble attempt at covering up his heart by kissing her now seemingly-sad face, really kissing her, anything to take away the wound he’d just created. He’d plead for her forgiveness on his knees - no, however she wanted - she had to know that he was just inexperienced, he had meant to be steadfast, he needed her so badly. After that, she would sink into his arms, and they would stay like that for a while and then perhaps forever…
Unfortunately, he did not possess the gall to do just that.
Instead, he cringed internally at the way Byleth’s face fell - at her resigned, fake laugh of assent - at the way she stood up, brushing her delicate clothes, saying it was a good time to go back and see how the others were doing. Of course, he followed her without question; he ignored the quizzical stares from Sylvain, Claude, Felix, even Edelgard as he allowed himself to be immersed by the female horde who all wanted the same thing: his heart.
It was too bad that he had already sealed his heart away to another.
Feeling downtrodden, Dimitri resolved to himself to confess before the year’s end - when he was a better, stronger, more courageous man. A man worthy of her and his kingdom.
He would definitely do it just right the next time.
Yes, he had all the time in the world.