Chapter Text
Michael quickly dried of her tears when she heard Tilly at the door. Tilly threw herself on the bed.
“I tell you; Ensign Martin is driving me crazy; he keeps moving…” she stopped.
“Have you been crying?” Michael didn't reply. “I am so selfish, just going on and on, and… Oh you just look awful.” Michael looked down, as Tilly continued
“I didn't mean, awful, awful, you always look pretty... I…” Michael could feel tears coming again. It was completely illogical to be this emotional. It had barely been a break up since they hadn't been a couple to begin with.
“Was it that ensign Kenton?” “What? no!”' Michael had completely forgotten Kenton. Michael had a sparring session with him, and Tilly had a dirty mind…
“Is it Tyler?” Tilly happily guessed on. Michael shook her head. "But it is a guy, right?" Tilly asked, this for some reason Michael couldn't figure out why it also provoked an emotional response. "Oh my God, it is. Whatever happened. It will help if you tell." Tilly moved to sit next to Michael. "He just..." Trying to recall, she had difficulty processing what had actually happened. Which was strange because normally her analytical sense was not this impaired.
"He was actually very nice about it." she began to cry. Tilly looked insulted on her befall. "I am sure he was.” She said dryly. "He said, he thought I wasn't prepared for a…” Michael sniffed into her handkerchief. “…serious relationship. And..." she was feeling nauseous again, she stopped talking and ran to the refresher. Tilly was holding out a wet towel next to her when she looked up from the toilet.
"Thanks." "Did you tell, mystery, whoever, that you are pregnant?" Michael grabbed the towel "I am not..." she dry-heaved again. "Okay, sure. Ok, let's get you back to bed." she helped Michael to stand, and helped her back to her bed. Tilly tucked her in, "Try to see it you can sleep sweetie." Michael was just relieved the it appeared that Tilly was going to let her be. Tilly collected her uniform. "I'll be back!" she said and slit out of the room.
But if Michael had thought that Tilly would drop this, she was wrong. She awoke at the sound of a medical scanner humming next to her head. She sat up. looking Tilly straight in the eyes in horror. Coming to a realization.
“Did you steal a medical tricorder?” “borrowed, I am putting it back right after..." She held a breath.” “Holy shit, I was right. You are pregnant!” Michael wrestled the tricorder from Tilly. “What? No, let me see.”
“Gestation age forty-six days.” It read.
Michael was going to throw up again. When she was safely back in bed Tilly had made a Cup of tea.
“Okay, sweetie, drink this.” Michael sipped from the tea. it actually did settle her stomach.
"So, you had three dates in that time period, right. Since Martin is a tellarite, so he is ruled out, that leaves two... So …” “I know who the father is Tilly!” Michael interrupted her. Those three had not been dates, and she definitely did not have sex with any of them.
“Is it that asshole that…” “He is not... He was right” Michael said resignedly. “So, you have been dating all this time and not told me…” “Tilly. I… we were not dating.” “Just having sex?” Michael was going to protest, but that was probably the correct description of her relationship. Past relationship, she corrected.
“Okay, so you need to tell him. Else I will.” Michael suddenly looked alarmed. "He has enough to worry about, and..." "Who on board has more to worry about than you. Oh my god..." she stopped. "You are sleeping with Captain Pike?” Michael tried to look like it wasn’t true, but Tilly had seen right through her, damn perceptive roommate "Oh my god, you are pregnant with Captain hotass's baby.”
“I was sleeping with him, past-tense, Tilly, I am not sleeping with him anymore.” Michael said, pulling her pillow over her head, not wanting to listen to Tilly’s response to that.
———
Michael knew she should have reported in the following day. She really wasn't feeling her best. If best was not wanting to throw up every ten seconds and actually being able to stand without getting dizzy. But as uncomfortable as working might be it was nothing compared to the loneliness, she felt being alone.
Fortunately, Commander Saru had the bridge. Pike was only there shortly when she reported for duty, he then left for his ready room leaving the bridge to Saru.
“Burnham” He greeted without looking at her. “Captain” She greeted back and took over the science station from Ensign Thomson.
“You have the bridge, Saru.” Pike said, and left for his ready room. It only took fifty minutes for Michael to decide that coming to work might have been a mistake. Between trying to contain her nausea and her dizziness. She was thinking whether it would have been a good idea to have gotten breakfast. But the very idea seems to make her even worse.
“Commander Burnham, can you get a reading on the asteroid?" She heard somewhere in the distance. "I, no, I need to leave." she said leaving a dumb folded crew, while she fled out of the door. It felt like an accomplishment that she made it all the way to her own refresher before vomiting.
To be fair to Captain Pike, her work had been substandard, and she really should have gotten a sick note from doctor Pollard, or at least have gone see medical attention. She had been called into his ready room when she returned after an hour.
“Listen, Burnham.” Pike said. Indicating that she should sit down. “You need to pull yourself together, I don't know if this is because of us or…" He trailed oft, trying to read her.
“You said it yourself, sir. We didn’t even have a real relationship.” Michael stared at him like a defiant child. He didn’t respond.
“I will increase my performance, sir!” Pike took that in for a moment, while displaying some sort of emotion, but Michael was unable to decipher what that emotion was.
“Okay.” He said slowly. “Do you want to talk about what it is then?”
Michael thought of the child, and she thought about feeling his comforting arms around her. Whispering loving things in her ears.
“No Sir, it is personal.” She said.
Pike sighed. “Okay, Burnham. I won't pressure you then. But it is clearly eating at you.” She took a moment to translate the idiom. Michael nodded
“If that was all, sir?” She said stiffly.
He gestured that she could leave.
———
"I guess you are not going to the party tonight?" Tilly said skeptical at Michael, who had hidden herself under her bed cover.
“You know, I didn't think I would be saying this. But you need to pull yourself together, or at least tell him that you love him.” Tilly put a finishing touch on her hair.
Michael found it completely illogical, that she would have this type of emotional breakdown. It had to be the hormones. She sat up, and dried her cheeks.
“You also really need to tell him about the baby.” Tilly huffed. “Technically is it a fetus, not a baby." Michael corrected. Making Tilly huff at her again.
“You are still stalling! It will be a real baby real soon. Do you think he won't notice?”
Michael looked down at her stomach. There was not much to see at the moment, it looked slightly distended maybe.
“I don’t want him to feel obliged to participate in a relationship with me, just because…" Michael dried of more tears from her cheeks.
“I understand that, but he is the captain and he is going to find out eventually.” Michael knew, but she just needed more time. Tilly changed the topic.
"What did doctor Pollard say?" Tilly asked.
Why was Tilly doing this to her? “I …” “You didn't go see her, did you?” Tilly rolled her eyes as Michael shook her head.
“Well, I know that a speech about forgotten preservatives isn't what you need right now. But this about the health of your baby.” “Fetus!” “Whatever.”
Michael got up and put on her dress, she did not want to discuss this anymore.
“Gosh, you really look pregnant.” Tilly said non-helpfully, this did not bode well for how she was perceived by others.
“I am pregnant" Michael said disgruntled. Tilly blocked her from leaving.
“I am happy that you decided to come to the party, and I can't believe I am saying this. But you need to not wear that dress and put on your uniform again else the whole ship will know.”
Michael went to the infirmary the next morning.
“I went to see doctor Pollard” Michael said to Tilly when she got back. "That is a good thing, right? Oh no, was something wrong, sweetie?” Tilly began moving in to give her a hug. “Was the baby alright?” Michael didn't know how to formulate it; a lump was struck in her throat.
“No, that was not...” “Then what…?” “Babies.” Michael corrected. “The babies are fine.” Tilly took a moment to digest this new information. “Twins, you are having twins.” Tilly had difficulty to contain her enthusiasm. “No wonder you are that huge already.” “I don't think I am…” Michael moved a hand to her stomach.