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You watched as he stumbled into his apartment, no doubt exhausted from the mission he’d just returned from. The air was crisp. It was colder this year than it had been the last, September bringing in the cold of autumn. You tugged your cloak up further and swiftly bounced up the stairs leading to his door. You hadn’t particularly been waiting for him, but you knew he should be home around now, and, well, you just happened to be in the right part of the village. It wasn’t your fault that he always decided to mope around today, rather than acknowledge the importance of the date. Even in this world you had to make time for these little celebrations. He may find it trivial… but it would always be worth the strange look he might give you.
Your knuckles rapped lightly on the door, “Hey, it's me. Open up.” After a moment of nothing, you continued, “I mean it, c’mon. I know you’re home, Kakashi.” Impatiently you played with the hem of your cloak, wondering if he would just leave you out there. He did seem tired, so maybe it would best he got some rest, anyway. As you turned to leave, though, the door clicked, revealing Kakashi, dressed down a bit from his usual attire.
He teased lightly, “I’ve no idea how you’ve made it this far as a ninja, being as impatient as you are.”
As he leaned against the doorway you smiled at him, “Oh, I suppose I would have to credit my innate skills as a shinobi, and, of course, my peers who always seem to be running late and making me wait anyway.”
He scoffed, “Alright, I get it. Why are you here?”
You gave him a narrowed glare, “You know why I’m here.”
He scratched the back of his head, giving you a bit of a blank stare, “I uh, I really don’t. I suppose it isn’t a terrible occurrence though.” He stepped to the side, motioning for you to come in.
“I know you’ve only just gotten home but have you really forgotten your own birthday, Kakashi? Or are you just trying to avoid acknowledging that you’re becoming an old man?” You stepped past him, and your sides lightly brushed. You took a breath to calm yourself and walked into his kitchen, stopping at the table.
He groaned, “An old man ? We’re the same age!” After a short pause he continued, “I hadn’t realized it was already so far into the month. I wasn’t planning on celebrating, anyway.”
“I figured.” You placed the bottle of sake onto the table, and rummaged through your pouches until you found the small unassuming box you were looking for, and carefully placed it on the table as well.
“What’re you—“
“I also figured you would try to dodge any attempts to bring you out anywhere. You should have at least a few days off until your next mission, so getting drunk and having a quiet night in wouldn’t be too troublesome for you, right?”
He sighed your name, followed by a soft, “This isn’t necessary.”
“Don’t be foolish. Of course it’s necessary.” You looked through his cupboards until you found some drinking glasses, and set them out as well, “We should celebrate every year we have, kakashi.”
He gave you an odd look— a soft sort of look. You swallowed and broke eye contact, busying yourself with pouring him a drink, instead of having to deal with whatever feelings he stirred up in you.
“Fine,” he said, “but should my genin come looking for me for any reason tomorrow morning, they’re your responsibility.”
You laughed, “Let's hope they don’t then, shall we?”
As you set the bottle down, his fingers grazed over yours, gripping the bottle to pour your drink for you. You could feel a bit of heat rush to your cheeks, and you realized that this encounter could skew either very casual, or very intimate.
You cleared your throat quietly, silently begging to start drinking so you could plausibly blame your flushed face on being drunk, rather than the fact that Kakashi made you feel like a schoolgirl with a crush. Instead, you unbuttoned your cloak and set it on the back of your chair to keep yourself distracted.
“Cheers.” You lifted your gaze back up to him, and lifted your glass as well. He had rolled his mask down while you weren’t looking. You had seen him without it a few times, but were still unaccustomed to him being without it. Your gaze drifted down to his lips and you made a mental note to not stare.
“To another year.”
He hummed back at you and your glasses clinked together. He eyed the box you had set on the table curiously, but sat down rather than let curiosity get the better of him.
You let out a sort of giggle, “It’s ah, it’s for later. When you’re more drunk and less likely to make fun of me for being so sentimental.”
“Oh, you think I’ll be less likely to make fun of you for being sentimental once im drunk? I’m sorry to disappoint but I don’t think that’ll be the case.”
You kick his shin under the table lightly, “Yeah, you say that now but we’ll see who knows better once you actually open it, huh?”
He chuckled out, “I suppose so.” A loud crackle of thunder drew his attention to the west window, and he watched as rain started to pour down in sheets.
After a few drinks, his cheeks had become quite flushed, and you could assume that you were in a similar state. “I was nervous you were going to leave me out there.” You stated absentmindedly, watching the rain fall as you imagined being out in the cold.
“I doubt that would have stopped you,” he teased.
You pouted, “You’re right but you shouldn’t say it Kakashi-chan. I shouldn’t have to break into your apartment to get you to celebrate your own birthday.”
“And you didn’t.” He paused. “I wouldn’t have actually left you out in the rain. Probably.”
“ Probably ?” You questioned, as you stood quickly and subsequently tripped on the leg of the table. You squeaked as you tumbled forward, landing partially in one of Kakashi’s outstretched arms, heart beating fast from both the anticipation of falling flat on your face, and from Kakashi’s arm wrapped around your middle, keeping you stable.
You had ended up half on his chair, and half on him, and you punched his arm lightly, “Jerk. ‘Probably’. I can’t believe I'm friends with you.”
He smiled with his eyes closed. He was so warm, so comfortable. All you could think about was getting closer. Your eyes drifted back down to his lips, and your head drifted toward his. Willpower had to be worth something, right? The furthest you could pull your head to was resting it between his neck and shoulder, but he was too warm, too comfortable to care about how embarrassing this situation would be at any other time.
When he felt you nuzzle into him, he hesitated, unsure if he should speak or not. Softly, he asked, “Are you alright?”
Surprising yourself, you shook your head no. Your voice was barely above a whisper when you responded to him, “I... worry for you, Kakashi.” You took a shallow breath, in an attempt to calm yourself, to no avail. “All of the time.”
If he could think of something to say that wouldn’t be a lie, he would have said it. Both of you knew just how dangerous being a shinobi was, no matter how capable the ninja.
He wished he could tell you that there was no need to worry.
When you leant back you wiped at your eyes to make sure that no tears escaped them. You gave a half-laugh as you reached behind you for the small box you had earlier placed on the table.
You handed it over to him as you said, “I’m being overdramatic, I know.”
He took the small giftbox carefully, and unlaced the ribbon holding it closed. Inside was a kunai, sharp and well maintained, engraved onto the side was the symbol for luck. Picking up the kunai, he realized beneath it was a framed picture of the two of you, looking much younger, and much more playfully antagonistic.
“What’s this?” He asked, holding the kunai, meaning the significance of it, rather than the actual object.
“Oh— I uh, I thought it looked nice! That you might. You know. Like. It.”
You were a bad liar. At least when it came to him.
He hummed, unconvinced, “Uhuh. What is it really?”
You sighed, and looked off to the side while your face heated up, explaining yourself, “Well… My father always told me that a shinobi needed to be quick, smart, and above all, lucky. That no amount of training could pull you out of some situations. That a lucky shinobi was the shinobi who would come home to their family. I don’t mean to insult you, I’m not saying you need it— in fact you’re likely the most competent shinobi I know. But it would make me feel better. If you had it with you, I mean.”
Before he could respond, you stood from your embrace and cleared your throat, “I uh, It’s going to be cold this year.” You needed to get out , and went for the door as you continued, “Cold winters are always brutal. I’ve always lost those I cherish during the winter.”
He called to you, but you didn’t turn back to look at him. As you reached for the door, he caught your hand gently. “If you’re already leaving…” He draped your cloak that you had abandoned at the table over your shoulders, “at least bring your cloak. It’s still raining.”
He didn’t let go of your hand, but you made no move to pull it from his grip, either.
“You were right.” He continued, “I might have teased you for such a sentimental gift earlier today.” He tugged lightly on your hand, in an attempt to get you to face him. You did so, but refused to meet his gaze. “I don’t deserve to have you worry over me. But perhaps I’m a selfish man. That I would have you worry only for me, as long as I cannot tell you there is no need for worry.”
Slowly, you brought your gaze up to his face. His eyebrows were knitted tightly, and a frown was painted on his face, along with a darker blush than what the drink had gave him. When you caught his gaze, his eyes flickered back and forth between your own, uncertain. “Kakashi?” Unknowingly you squeezed his hand, your heart in your throat.
You stopped breathing when he brushed your hair out of your face. Before you could realize it, you were drifting toward him again, consumed by thoughts of how warm he was, how much you wanted to touch him, or have him hold you. He brought your hand that he was holding up to his chest, and left it there, feeling the thrumming of his heart, as he cupped your face with both of his hands, his eyes fluttering shut, and pulled you in for a soft kiss.
He pulled back slightly, “I worry for you too, you know.”