Work Text:
“You’ve lost your resolve!”
“You said that you would bring us her head! Now you hope to make peace with her? Are you siding with our murderer?”
“We threw away our lives for you. It’s the least you could do. Now you’ve turned your back on us.”
“Worthless. I’m ashamed to call you my son.”
Dimitri sighed in frustration, gripping the hands he had folded in prayer even tighter. Whenever he had nightmares, he would often go to the cathedral, hoping to find some measure of peace. But tonight, as he attempted to petition the goddess, the voices crescendoed to the point that piecing his thoughts together became impossible.
“Dimitri?” A voice rang out, temporarily disrupting the deluge of accusations raging in his mind. Dimitri turned his head to see Byleth standing behind him. Her features were aglow in the moonlight that poured through the ruined ceiling overhead. She walked closer to Dimitri until she noticed his clasped hands, “I’m sorry- were you praying just now?”
"Something like that… it’s more like begging." He relaxed his arms and motioned for Byleth to come closer, "You didn't interrupt much, professor. If you don't mind, I'd appreciate your company for a while.”
“I don’t mind at all, Dimitri.” Byleth smiled as she drew nearer to his side. As Dimitri looked upon her face, he had to avert his gaze. Somehow, after all these years, her smile still managed to disarm him and, for a moment, he felt he was once again the flustered boy from his academy days, “Is something wrong?”
“Ah, no. My apologies.” Dimitri sheepishly met her eyes again, afraid that he may have offended her somehow, “I got a little distracted.”
They both stood there a moment in awkward silence until Byleth spoke up about something that was on her mind, “Just a moment ago, you said that your praying was more like begging. Do you mind telling me what you meant by that?”
Dimitri bowed his head slightly, “Begging seems more appropriate for a wretch who asks for something that he does not deserve.” He explained, “Especially when he is requesting something from a divine goddess.”
“I see.” She perched her hand underneath her chin in thought, “I think I remember you talking about begging before… after the ball at the Goddess Tower, if I’m not mistaken."
“Did I?” Dimitri closed his eyes, trying to recall as well. He could never forget his feelings or, more importantly, his wish from that night, but he had difficulty remembering the exact wording of the conversation that they had “Ah, yes.” He opened up his eyes and nodded, “You are right. I said something around the lines of, if one begs to be saved, the goddess would never reach out her hand to do so.” He paused for a moment, “…I was trying to speak in terms of anonymity, but I suppose, even then, it was clear that the one begging to be saved was myself."
He fell silent, contemplating for a moment if he should confide in Byleth about a certain truth about himself, “This may come as a surprise since I am not a pious man… but, ever since that tragic day, I have pleaded to the goddess every night to reach out and save me. After many years, I fell into despair as it became apparent that she would never heed my pleas. But, even after I lost hope, I continued to beg… even during the five years when I roamed the land like a wild beast. For who other than the goddess could pull me free from this all-consuming darkness that kept an iron grip on my mind and soul?"
Upon hearing the anguish in Dimitri’s voice, Byleth’s heart began to ache for him. Before Rodrigue’s death, Dimitri seldom left the cathedral, and would always be facing the rubble where the pulpit had once been. Was he silently pleading for salvation all that time? “Dimitri…” She was unsure of what to say, so she opted to place a hand on his cheek instead.
Dimitri allowed Byleth’s hand to rest on his face for a while. Then he gently took the hand into his own, softly tracing the knuckles and the bones of her fingers with his thumb.
“However, it seems that the goddess does answer the cries of the wretched. Eventually, she did extend her hand to me… through one blessed with her power. You appeared in this very place, bathed in the light just like you are now, offering an escape from the darkness. When you reached out your hand, I didn’t accept it … but you continued to offer it again and again until I eventually grasped it.” He clasped the top of the hand he was holding with his other, “Even now, you continue to guide me and this army with your hands. I know I have already expressed my gratitude many times before… but thank you, professor.”
Byleth nearly blushed. Although Dimitri was merely holding her hand, the gesture felt almost intimate, "Of course, Dimitri. I’m glad that I could help you in some way. Ever since that day, it has been a pleasure seeing you mature into the king you’re meant to be. I’m very proud of you.”
Dimitri turned his head away in embarrassment. Byleth’s praise always managed to make his cheeks burn red. She lavished similar praise on him not too long before, and he told her that he did not deserve it. However, he decided to be more gracious tonight, "Your words to me have always been so kind. I appreciate them." He released her hand from his own and took a second to ponder how he managed to muster the courage to have held onto it for so long.
“If the goddess has answered your pleas to be saved, what are you asking for now?” Byleth asked.
"O-Oh, that." Dimitri rubbed the back of his neck, "I planned to ask her to continue to use her power to… protect you and give you the strength you need to protect the others and the people of Fodlan."
Byleth clasped her hands and bowed her head, “Then I will also ask the goddess for the same thing for you.”
“…Thank you.” Dimitri replied, clasping his own hands to join her. The din of voices in his head was still present. The voices would always be there. But, with Byleth by his side, they seemed quieter somehow, and he was able to better focus on offering up his silent supplications.
Afterward, both Byleth and Dimitri sat at one of the pews and talked for a few hours. Even after they exhausted topics to discuss, they enjoyed each other’s company for a long time, both satisfied with just each other’s presence. When he heard a change in Byleth’s breathing pattern, Dimitri turned his head to see that she had fallen asleep, resting her head on his shoulder. She looked so serene that he could not bear the thought of waking her. So, instead, he remained in place until he finally fell asleep as well.
As they slumbered, they were unaware the ethereal figure of Sothis had manifested before them. She floated over to the pair and observed Dimitri’s resting face, “I have heard your prayer tonight. I vow to you that I will keep her safe.” Suddenly, the goddess’s mouth curved upward into a mischievous smirk, “And do not worry. I have also heard your other prayer… for the professor’s love no less!
“But, ah, you don’t need divine intervention for that. After all, you are asking for something that you already have. I know because I know her heart as well as my own.” She giggled, “It will be so amusing to watch when you finally come to the realization!”
Sothis yawned and stretched her limbs. When her soul joined with Byleth’s, she could only manifest herself independently from her for short periods, “Since you have prayed for what you already have… how about I do this for you instead?” She placed a transparent hand on Dimitri’s temple, “Tonight, do not dream of nightmares of the past. Instead, dream of hopes for the future. Dream of you and her together, working toward the vision of Fodlan that you desire.” With that, the goddess’s form disappeared, leaving the two to their peaceful dreams.