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The smile on Minseok’s face is wry as he listens to his cousin’s whining. Jongdae helps Minseok pack for the week long camping trip. Expertly rolling up a sleeping bag, Jongdae pouts.
“That trip was made for me! What the hell is Park Chanyeol thinking, planning it on the week of my exams?”
“Hey, it’s not his fault your department’s exams are on a different schedule. Besides, Chanyeol said it was because there were sightings recently and he didn’t want to lose-”
Minseok feels a little guilty at the way Jongdae looks so disappointed, despite his words.
“Still” Jongdae presses. “How could you leave the one BigFoot fanatic in our group?”
An awkward laugh escapes Minseok’s lips, but Jongdae drops the subject. They continue packing. Minseok nods while Jongdae gives him tips about camping and Minseok pretends like he’s not betraying his best friend and cousin.
Four of them live together - Minseok, Jongdae, Baekhyun, and Kyungsoo. It’s the reason why Chanyeol calls their shared condo The Dwarf House. Today, Jongdae and Baekhyun are both out studying at the library. Kyungsoo cooks breakfast while waiting with Minseok.
Though all of them are great friends, Minseok somehow feels a little closer to Kyungsoo, like a kindred spirit. This is one of the reasons why Kyungsoo’s the only one who knows Minseok’s secret.
“Are you sure you’re gonna be okay going on a trip alone with Park Chanyeol?”
Minseok glances at Kyungsoo before looking down at his swinging feet. He’s sitting on a kitchen stool, enjoying the smell emitting from the potato pancakes that Kyungsoo is making.
“I told you. I’m not going for him. I’m just … going to look for the ghost orchid. There have been some sightings recently.”
“Pfft” Kyungsoo snorts while flipping pancakes. “I think the only person to believe that is Park Chanyeol himself, unfortunately.”
Minseok sighs. The Ghost Orchid was a rare flower and some hikers had posted sightings of the flower in the same area that the BigFoot sightings had been. Kyungsoo was right though. Minseok himself didn’t believe the excuse. It was just a lame reason to go on this trip.
There’s a honk outside their condo and Minseok jumps up.
“It must be Chanyeol” Minseok says in one breath. “I’ll be going Kyungsoo-yah.”
Minseok hoists his backpack on his shoulder. He grabs his water flask and turns to the door to put on his shoes, but Kyungsoo holds him back by the wrist. Still in his apron, Kyungsoo has a stern expression on his face when Minseok looks back.
“I want to make sure you'll be okay” Kyungsoo tells him. “Call me if anything happens. I’ll come get you.”
Minseok lets out a little laugh. “Even if I’m in the middle of nowhere?”
Kyungsoo’s face is still serious when he replies. “Even if you’re in the middle of nowhere.”
Something warm touches his hand and Minseok looks down. It’s a bundle of aluminium foil.
“I wrapped some potato pancakes for you” Kyungsoo says after a beat of silence. “Share with Chanyeol on the way, okay?”
Though Chanyeol’s been camping more often, Minseok has more off-road driving experience and therefore offers to drive. If anything Minseok wants to be a good camping partner, not a burden.
While driving, Minseok only takes his eyes off the road to sneak peeks at Chanyeol. They talk about everything except for the fact that Minseok has been harboring an all-consuming and secret crush on Chanyeol for more than two years now. Minseok tries not to think about Kyungsoo’s cryptic warnings or Baekhyun’s suspicious innuendos. And though Minseok’s not the type to get his hopes up for nothing, he has a feeling that this trip will be more than just camping between friends.
Minseok looks over to Chanyeol furtively as he’s driving along the highway that leads further away from the city. There’s a constant smile playing on Chanyeol’s lips and a fond, soft look in Chanyeol’s eyes whenever he turns to Minseok to tell him directions.
If Minseok’s telling the truth, he’s not very interested in BigFoot or anything of the sort. He just doesn’t believe in that kind of nonsense. However, when Jongdae and Baekhyun aren't able to go due to exams and when Kyungsoo had turned Chanyeol down so curtly, Minseok hadn't been able to say no to those big puppy dog eyes.
Minseok tries not to think about the fact that just this past week, Jongdae and Baekhyun have been especially obnoxious - asking Minseok about being alright with how odd Chanyeol was or how inexperienced Chanyeol was.
("Inexperienced?" Minseok had asked.
Baekhyun had waggled his brows. "Inexperienced in b-"
"He means with camping and hiking" Jongdae had hurriedly explained.)
Jongdae had especially stressed the fact that they were going to be alone during this camping trip.
“Just the two of you” Jongdae had said. “Imagine, being all alone in the woods with only Park Chanyeol around?”
Minseok hadn’t been able to face Jongdae and ask if he knew about Minseok’s crush. Surely, Jongdae had been hinting at something because he knew about Minseok's crush?
Remembering Jongdae makes Minseok remember the gift Jongdae had given Minseok for the trip. Minseok recalls the Polaroid nestled safely in his backpack. Despite the anxiety about his secret, Minseok can’t help but grin and tap his fingers on the steering wheel excitedly as he thinks about taking lots of pictures to commemorate the moments he wants to treasure with Chanyeol.
The first day, all Minseok remembers is being tired. They park the car and set up camp at the initial site. The main topic of discussion is Chanyeol’s plan for their week long trip. When Minseok crawls into their tent to lie beside Chanyeol, he’s too exhausted to feel his heart fluttering. But right before he closes his eyes, Minseok remembers the way Chanyeol always visits their home, asking for Jongdae with a flush on his cheeks.
The second day is filled with hiking and more hiking. They go deeper into the woods where it’s impossible for cars to reach. Minseok’s not one to miss out on his daily work-outs but the trek tires him out easily as he’s not used to the terrain. All he looks to is Chanyeol’s back as Chanyeol hikes ahead of him, leading the way. Intermittently, Chanyeol talks about where others have seen the sightings, but all Minseok can see is how beautiful Chanyeol looks against the backdrop of the forest. There's a rosy glow to Chanyeol's cheeks from the exercise and Chanyeol's wide eyes sparkle in the sunlight. Chanyeol even makes the ugly brown camping outfit he has on, seem like something off the runway.
They set up their tent in a clearing in the middle of a birch tree grove. Minseok’s breathless but he doesn’t know if it’s from the exertion or from the image of Chanyeol against the pale bark of the trees. At nightfall, Minseok closes his eyes to Chanyeol prattle on and on about BigFoot. Since they’re getting closer to their end goal, Chanyeol’s getting more and more excited; Minseok can hear it in Chanyeol's voice.
“But hyung” Chanyeol continues. “What about the plant you’re looking for? I heard from Kyungsoo that it was a really, really rare one. If you find it, are you going to get published?”
Minseok chuckles sleepily. “Maybe” he answers. “But who knows if I’ll be able to find it or even if the posts about it in this area are true.”
“Still” Chanyeol smiles, putting his hands behind his head. “It’s nice to imagine the possibility, isn’t it? It'd be really great if you got something good from this trip.”
On the third day, they slow down as they get closer to the area where the BigFoot sightings were reported. Finally, Minseok feels like he’s able to breathe in deeply and take in the forest air. He takes out Jongdae’s present - the Polaroid camera - and snaps photos of plants and wildlife he finds.
As a botany major, Minseok’s always liked the quiet language of plants. He spies a patch of fireweed and snaps a photo so he can show Kyungsoo. Though Kyungsoo is more of a succulent man, Minseok knows Kyungsoo appreciates a good photo of flowers. It’s a nice change of pace to be away from his cell phone and to use a film camera.
Minseok's taking a shot of some mustard flowers when Chanyeol comes up behind him with an armful of branches for a campfire.
“That’s a good one” Chanyeol remarks, hanging his chin on Minseok’s shoulder to take a closer look. “Really pretty.”
The touch is over as suddenly and as soon as it comes. Rather than the heaviness of when it happened, Minseok feels the loss of Chanyeol’s weight as soon as he’s gone. When Minseok turns around, camera and photos still in hand, all he sees is Chanyeol’s back. There's a wistful sort of feeling that swirls around in Minseok's chest at the sight of Chanyeol's form getting smaller and smaller as he walks away.
That night, Chanyeol makes split pea soup from a powdered mix. It’s delicious, but Minseok can’t really taste it properly. Chanyeol’s busy talking about the footprints he’s found in the forest that afternoon.
“They’re definitely not from a four legged animal” Chanyeol explains passionately. “It looked more like a human’s but I can’t be too sure because I’m 99 percent sure that we’re the only ones here in the area.”
“Oh really?” Minseok’s heart isn’t really in the conversation, but he tries to maintain the smile on his face.
Maybe it’s the isolation of the forest, but something bursts inside of Minseok and he suddenly feels immensely fatalistic. Everything seems futile and as he stares at Chanyeol’s face in the firelight, Chanyeol just seems so far away. He really is very handsome, but more than that, Chanyeol holds a sweetness and a fire inside of him that seems untouchable.
At that moment, it almost tumbles out of Minseok's mouth. But before it hits the air, the confession warps and turns into something ugly. Before the twisted and bitter thing can show itself, Minseok shuts his mouth. He sighs and rubs a hand over his eyes.
“Chanyeol-ah. I think I’m going to turn in. I’m sorry. I’m just so tired.”
“Oh. OK, hyung. I’ll clean up. Good night. Get some rest.”
If Chanyeol seems a little disappointed, Minseok chooses to ignore it. He washes up behind the tent and turns in, crawling into his sleeping bag without another glance in Chanyeol’s direction. He doesn't even hear when Chanyeol enters the tent after him because he's already asleep.
On the fourth day, they each spend their days separately. Chanyeol goes to search for more footprints and artifacts while Minseok holds up the farce of searching for the ghost orchid.
Minseok wanders aimlessly around the perimeter of their camping grounds. The forest is thicker in these parts and Minseok doesn’t want to get lost. He’s careful to mark where he’s going and when he finds a small stream, he sits on a rock at the shoreline. Minseok is quick to regret coming on this trip. He reminisces about when they’d first met.
Jongdae had been the one to bring Chanyeol into their group of friends. Park Chanyeol had been bright eyed and eager to make friends. He’d followed Jongdae around like a puppy and was curious about Minseok only because he was Jongdae’s cousin.
Chanyeol had become close very quickly with Baekhyun and Kyungsoo as well. And their little family of four had become a close friend group of five. All throughout their first two years of college, they’d become closer. Minseok’s feelings had changed little by little, but Minseok had also seen the way Chanyeol became especially close to Jongdae.
Minseok never wanted to be jealous of his best friend and cousin. However, this trip was becoming more of a catalyst for Minseok’s own feelings than a trip to bring them closer as friends.
Immersed in his thoughts, Minseok doesn’t notice when the sky turns darker. What brings him out of his reverie is the soft drizzle coating his head with moisture. Quickly, he makes his way back to the camp. He’s a little worried because if it gets too dark, he won’t be able to see his own marks - his own path back to the tent. He grips his Polaroid close to his chest and regrets not bringing his phone.
His footsteps become quicker and his breath starts becoming more and more ragged with the panic he’s feeling. His hearing becomes hypersensitive and he can hear rustling from somewhere in his periphery. They’d been warned of wildlife such as wolves, wild boars, and bears. Minseok’s mind races.
Suddenly, an especially loud rustling gets closer. The dark trees to his left sway with some kind of force or some kind of being. About ten meters away, Minseok can make out a tall creature, hunched over, holding fistfuls of greenery and branches.
Minseok gulps down a scream as stills. When he does, the creature does too. Back when Chanyeol had spouted his soapbox speech about how even Jane Goodall believed in the existence of Yetis, Minseok hadn’t batted an eyelash. But now, in the midst of this giant being covered in hair and pine needles, Minseok was starting to doubt himself.
There are times in Minseok’s life that he becomes amazingly calm in the face of sheer panic. It’s one of those times now as Minseok slowly raises his Polaroid to his face. He can’t see properly through the viewfinder, but he points the lens at the creature. The second the flash goes off, Minseok makes a run for it.
Soles beating hard on the bumpy ground, Minseok sprints towards the camp, barely glancing at the careful marks he’s placed. Miraculously, he finds his way back to the camp. He rushes to find Chanyeol, photo in hand, but Chanyeol’s nowhere to be found.
Another surge of panic and dread gurgles in his intestines as he goes inside the tent. He drops his camera on the sleeping bag and steps back outside when he doesn’t see any evidence of Chanyeol coming back inside the tent since this morning. A fire is going which means Chanyeol couldn’t have gone far, but Minseok waits for twenty minutes and Chanyeol hasn’t come back.
Minseok bites his nails, wondering if he should go back into the forest to find Chanyeol. He holds his cell in hand, wondering if he should call Kyungsoo or the forest rangers to send out a search party.
Suddenly, there’s the sound of footsteps on the soft ground. Minseok jumps up from where he’s been sitting. The heavy pine trees part and there’s Chanyeol. Relief washes over Minseok like a tidal wave and he rushes over to Chanyeol. The taller boy is covered in leaves and pine needles, but he’s safe.
Without thinking, Minseok envelops him in a hug. “Where were you?” he asks, voice a little watery. “I thought-”
“Sorry hyung. I didn’t mean to make you worry. I-”
But Minseok cuts Chanyeol off by putting his hands on either of Chanyeol’s cheeks, peering straight into Chanyeol’s eyes. Minseok leans in. Their faces mere millimeters apart and truth be told, Minseok himself isn’t sure what he plans on doing next. But he feels Chanyeol’s breath on his upper lip and quickly, Minseok withdraws.
“You had me worried sick” Minseok mutters, releasing Chanyeol’s cheeks. “Please don’t do that again.”
Chanyeol swallows audibly and lets out a shaky laugh. “Sorry hyung” he says, but Minseok’s already heading back into the tent.
By the fifth day, it’s already time to head back to base camp. It’s a two day hike back to where they’ve parked the car and they hike in steady silence.
It’s only at night that Minseok takes another look at his Polaroids. He goes through them chronologically, smiling when a rare photo of the two of them emerges. The last photo is one of Minseok’s BigFoot sighting. In all the panic, Minseok had completely forgotten to show Chanyeol.
He gets up from the small fold up stool and moves to exit the tent when he suddenly stops. Minseok sits back down and squints at the photo. Despite the flash, it’s a dark shot. There are several trees in the way and it’s a little too far of a distance. And yet…
He tosses the photo back into his backpack and heads out to where Chanyeol sits at the edge of the fire he’s made.
“Where were you last night?” Minseok asks.
“Hyung?”
“What were you doing all this time? Were you really looking for BigFoot?”
Chanyeol flushes, coughing into his fist.
“Well, I was going to surprise you when we got back, but…” Chanyeol pauses to produce a small container from his pack. “I wasn’t able to find a ghost orchid, but-”
Minseok steps closer and peers into the container to see a small white bud of a flower.
“I found this buttercup growing near the stream. It reminded me of you so I- I brought it back, so you could keep it.”
Minseok looks up at Chanyeol. He wants to say something back, but it feels like there’s something blocking his throat.
“I know you didn’t want to come on this trip” Chanyeol continues. “I know I practically forced you to join me. But I was really happy, you know? And Jongdae was encouraging me to- well… I at least wanted you to have something from this trip to make you smile.”
A confused expression forms on Minseok’s face as Chanyeol smiles a little sadly.
“Did you know, hyung?” Chanyeol asks. “You haven’t really smiled for this whole trip.”
Minseok’s face falls as he carefully sets the container down. The white buttercup is lovely, but Chanyeol - to Minseok - is more so. Gingerly, Minseok puts his arms around Chanyeol’s shoulders, pulling him into a hug.
“Thank you, Chanyeol-ah. And I’m so sorry. I just didn’t want to be a burden.” Minseok gently pulls away and tugs on Chanyeol’s hand. “Come to the tent. I have something to show you too.”
Unlike the first six days, the last day of the trip seems like it’s filled with nothing but laughter and bliss. Though Minseok protests, Chanyeol insists on holding hands as they hike. Instead of hiking one after the other, they walk side by side.
Minseok decides he likes the feeling of Chanyeol’s large hand in his. But something still nags at the back of his mind.
“Didn’t you like Jongdae?” Minseok asks carefully. “I thought you had a crush on Jongdae all this time.”
Chanyeol laughs, head thrown back and eyes twinkling.
“Hyung. You’re so clueless” he says fondly, stroking the back of Minseok’s hand with his thumb. “Why do you think I made friends with Kim Jongdae in the first place?”
When they get back to the condo, Baekhyun and Jongdae both look tired, just coming out of their exams. Though they look exhausted, they still have the energy to grin and tease once they see Chanyeol and Minseok holding hands.
“I knew it was gonna happen” Baekhyun says loudly. “Did Chanyeol break down and confess in the woods?”
Chanyeol’s ears get red, but Minseok just smiles. “It’s a secret” Minseok tells them.
Kyungsoo narrows his eyes at Chanyeol, punching him on the shoulder. “There’s more where that came from if you make Minseok hyung cry.”
It’s only later that Minseok sees the tiny white blossoms in the Polaroid of the supposed BigFoot. The flowers are gripped in the hands of a tall being covered in mud and pine needles. Minseok never shows the photo to Chanyeol, but keeps it safe in his desk. Perhaps, one day, there’d be a time when he’d show Chanyeol, but for now, Minseok keeps the precious memory for himself.