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She wasn’t sure when it became clear to her, but now that she knew, it was obvious. The signs were all there. The ones that she seemingly overlooked; missed. Now that it was staring her in the face, she realized it was the little things that tipped her off.
Laundry being folded. Breakfast made and ready in the early morning. Messes cleaned up that hadn’t been the night before.
She couldn’t say she was worried, no. It wasn’t that per se. It was more that she was concerned. How would it affect him? Was this another thing they wouldn’t talk about?
Lost in her thoughts, she placed her palms flat on the countertop. Of their own accord, her fingers lifted and began making wide circles, in tune with the rhythm of her thoughts. Becoming entranced with the movement and distracted by the scenes passing through her mind, her eyes glazed over. A few specific memories popped up for her, solidifying her realization, and causing questions to rise.
Would he be mad that she noticed? She hoped not. There wasn’t anything to be angry about. It was just an observation. It didn’t matter to her. Of course, she’d be concerned, but she was confident that he knew what was in his best interest. He was an adult. A grown man. He knew how to take care of himself.
So lost in her ministrations, she didn’t hear the sliding door open and the heavy footsteps that trudged through. She let out a small sigh, jolting back to reality and blinking the haze out of her eyes. Inhaling, she curled her hands in towards her. A sound from the doorway alerted her to his presence and her head snapped up. He stood there, hands hanging at his sides and staring. She met his stare with no questions; no alert.
“Been standing there long?” She finally asked.
He continued to stare, a habit of his. One that irked many people and at one time herself, but now, was something she’d grown used too. She continued to watch him, realizing quickly that he wasn’t planning to answer her. She shrugged and backed away from the counter, turning her back and opening the fridge.
“I was just about to make something to eat before I got distracted by my thoughts.” She explained to him, peering over her shoulder. She noticed that he’d moved closer and was standing on the other side of the counter, “Any requests?”
He shook his head, indicating that he was either not hungry, or wasn’t picky about what she chose to make. She went about making a quick meal, their shared silence and the familiar sounds of the beach as their only soundtrack.
She enjoyed their coexistence. Both having different versions of quiet, but both versions fitting seamlessly within each other. Together they maintained a comforting white noise. An ocean breeze floating through the window, or waves crashing against the shore.
She set out two plates, carrying them over to the island between them and setting one plate down in front of him. He glanced at the plate, now resting between his forearms. Using her hip for balance, she leaned against the island, picking up a few chips and popping them into her mouth.
She noted as he clenched his hands into fists before releasing them again. She tilted her head to the right and raised her eyes to search his face.
“Everything ok?” He asked her.
She blinked, processing the question. Ah, he was on edge about her comment. Admitting to being distracted, stuck in her thoughts had set off his internal alarms. She frowned for a moment. He was always so concerned with what she thought. As if she was going to run scared. She wondered how many people had let him down. How many people couldn’t accept him for who he was?
She sighed, before offering him a small smile, “Yes. Everything is fine.”
He stared, imploring her for more information. He’d never ask outright. It wasn’t how he operated. He waited. He observed. His intensity usually aided in people explaining themselves for him.
“You haven’t been sleeping.” She said, letting him know that she’d picked up on the little nuances. The ones that gave him away.
She watched as he froze. Shutting down. Keeping himself protected. His teeth clenched and his stare switched into a glare as he watched her. She could feel the tension rolling off him. She inhaled more questions about how he’d been treated popping into her head.
She knew his anger was always there. Simmering just below the surface. She knew he had trouble swallowing his own emotions, and she hated to see him storm off in a fit. He never spoke about it, but she knew. She knew his own feelings had been pushed aside one too many times by those he was closest too. His loved ones. His family.
It was an unspoken truth between them. She wouldn’t ever force him to admit his hurt. All she could do was be honest with him and it worked. For them. She was always open about her feelings. Never leaving anything up to interpretation. She made herself clear, letting him decipher how to approach situations on his own. Having full knowledge of what she was thinking; feeling.
She pushed off the counter and stepped around, her bare feet padding against the hardwood floors. He didn’t move, only his eyes following her as she came to stand next to him. She reached out, resting her hand against his cheek.
With a shrug and a smile, she murmured, “It’s just an observation.”
She leaned in towards him, dropping her hand to his shoulder and pressing a tender kiss to his cheek. As she pulled back, he turned his head, his eyes focused intently on her face. She could see the conflict behind his eyes. He wanted to believe her, believe that she wasn’t going to push him away. He didn’t want to be vulnerable. Not for anyone, not even himself.
Wrapping her arms around him, she rested her head on his shoulder, snuggling against him. He was always so warm. Her eyes fluttered closed as she settled into him. She relaxed, letting him know that she wasn’t scared. It didn’t matter to her.
“It’s alright Andrew,” She murmured, “I don’t mind. If you’re good, then I’m good.”
It took another tense moment of her keeping herself aloof for him before he settled. The tension pouring out of his body in a wave. She kept a solid hold on him, indicating that she wasn’t going to run away because he wasn’t sleeping. She didn’t know what was keeping him awake, but she knew that whatever it was, they could figure it out. He knew his own balance. He knew what he was capable of. All she could do was reinforce him and his decisions.
He shifted in his chair, opening his arms and capturing her in his embrace. He pulled her closer to him, wrapping his arms affectionately around her body. Reaching on hand up to palm the back of her head and cradle her. She smiled to herself.
They worked through so much together. This was one more steppingstone in their garden. Together they would flourish. Blooming with love, affection and support. She gave him everything he needed and asked for. He was her pillar, keeping her standing strong. They matched each other.
~(AK)~
Everything she did was graceful. Even if she stumbled, she made it look sinuous. Every movement she made appeared deliberate but effortless all the same. He sat on the ledge outside Baz’s house watching her. Her long hair wafted around her as she walked. Stooping down, she undid the buckle on her sandals and hooked the straps around her fingers before stepping barefoot on to the beach.
He could see the smile on her profile as she wiggled her feet in the sand. Half turning, she flicked her gaze towards him, using her free hand to tuck her hair behind one ear. She called out to him; her voice nearly silenced by the roaring wind. She laughed when she realized he could barely hear her. Instead of yelling again she opted into waving him over to her.
He felt a firm buzzing from inside his pocket. Inhaling deeply, he gave her a curt nod before slipping his hand into his jeans pocket. He lifted the phone up and slid his thumb across the screen to answer.
He didn't need to see the caller ID. He knew the voice the second they started talking. It was J. Calling a family meeting. He didn’t bother to listen to any of the details, knowing he’d get them all again at Smurfs.
Instead, he found himself caught up in watching as she twirled around. Her shoes wriggling carelessly in her grip. He didn’t have to hear her laugh to feel its effects. It was infectious. Affecting everyone around her. He swallowed, hearing the tinkling of her voice carried over the breeze.
He swallowed, agreeing to meet with J and hanging up without any care. Dropping his phone back into his pocket he slipped down from his perch. Without putting too much thought into his next course of action, strode across the Strand, moving directly towards her. Taking deliberate steps to clear his mind of any clutter.
She hardly had any time to notice him before he was on her. She stopped her spinning within seconds before he reached out, grabbing her face between his hands and pulling her towards him.
She gasped but the smile never dropped from her lips as he surrounded her. He kept his eyes steady on her face, gauging her reaction. Her grin grew as he brought her closer to him.
Finding his approval, he dipped down. His mouth descending onto hers while she closed her eyes, dropping her shoes to wrap her arms around his neck. She met his kiss with equal passion, letting him keep control. Her body melding into his, a perfect fit. His fingers massaged her scalp, as he held her tightly against him.
He could feel her hitched breathing, noting the effect he had on her. In a gentle caress, she toyed with his bottom lip, her teeth catching iI. He exhaled through his nose, his entire body falling against hers. The shark being turned onto his back soothed. She ran her hands along the outsides of his arms. Back and forth. She was his ocean. His breath of fresh air.
Breaking apart, he leaned his forehead against hers. She pressed another light kiss to his lips, bringing her hands up to frame his face. He opened his eyes to find her gazing up into his. He didn’t have to see her smile to know that it was there. The small affection causing his heart to stutter in his chest.
He knew the truth. He knew what he felt for her. He wasn’t ready to admit anything but he knew it was there. Everything about her calmed him. She was the eye of his storm. Her softness allowing him to feel human. If the world collapsed around them he wouldn't mind, as long as she stood right there, next to him. She was his counterpart, his perfect balance.
He smirked. Smurf was going to hate her.