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It had been a long and arduous battle and finally the Emperor was no more, but at what cost? Ben had felt Rey’s energy weakening towards the end of the attack, and he knew it was all his fault.
Early on in the onslaught he had made a bad choice and been rewarded with an open wound right across his abdomen. Not wanting to worry Rey, he has tried to keep his pain hidden from her, but he knew she felt it. That was when he started to sense her healing him through the bond they shared. This girl he had treated so badly, this girl who he had hunted and attacked, this girl who despite all his mistreatment, had agreed to finally join with him and help him defeat the biggest foe he had ever faced, had been drip feeding him her energy throughout the entire struggle and now she was unconscious because of it.
The moment it was finally over and the emperor had been extinguished once and for all by both their hands, Rey had turned to Ben and shot him an exhausted smile...just as her eyes had rolled back into her head and she had fallen to the ground, only Ben had caught her before she could hit the ships surface beneath their weary feet and carried her close to his chest though it hurt him to do so. This was not the first time Ben had been lucky enough to have Rey in his arms, he just wished that this time it could have been under more welcome circumstance. Ben looked down at Rey and tried to will her eyes to open, but they did not. He could hear the rhythmic sound of her breathing and that brought him some comfort. She would live, but would she still want him in her life? Ben did not know.
Poe and Finn approached him with worried looks as he carried Rey back to the Falcon.
‘She’s fine. Stay back.’ He said in order to elevate their concern, but also to keep them away from Rey. Ben was yet to have much contact with the rest of Rey’s merry band of followers, and he wasn’t sure he trusted them just yet. He also found that he didn’t like sharing Rey. No one could protect her like he could, they didn’t understand her like he did, they couldn’t lo….
‘Are you sure she’s okay?’ Said the one they called Finn reaching out a hand towards Rey’s head.
Ben angled himself to the side so Finn’s hand missed Rey’s head entirely, even though it hurt to make the move. He hissed in pain.
‘I told you, she’s fine. She’s just exhausted, I need somewhere she can rest.’
‘Take her onto the Falcon.’ Poe suggested.
‘I want to stay with her.’ Ben replied softly, looking down at Rey’s delicate features.
Finn and Poe looked at each other. They knew Rey and the Supreme Leader now calling himself Ben, has been training together in secret for months before they had discovered them. They knew she trusted him fully now. They also knew they didn’t trust him...yet.
‘I promise you, I mean her no harm. If I had wanted her dead why would I have put my own health in danger in order to return her to you?’ Ben gestured to his wound by lifting Rey up a few inches so they could see the blood across his middle section.
‘That’s not good, you need medical attention!’ Finn exclaimed, ‘Let me take her…’
‘No!’ Ben shouted, panting somewhat from the effort.
Poe stepped forward and put a hand on Finn’s shoulder. ‘Show him the way to the ship Finn.’ Poe said calmly.
Finn looked sceptical but nodded.
The boy didn’t get it, but the man, Poe, he seemed to understand or at least... he was trying to. That was enough. For now. It was enough that some were willing to try. He would try too. For Rey. Ben contemplated this as he followed Finn to the ship he knew oh so well.
**********
Rey’s first thought upon regaining consciousness, was of Ben. She shot up from the small cot in the Falcon and frowned when she saw him sitting opposite her on a bench with his legs placed wide apart and his head down.
‘Ben?’ She asked questioningly. He looked up at her with wide eyes.
‘It’s over. You’re safe now.’ He told her.
Rey felt relief rush through her, but it was short lived when she remembered Ben’s injury.
‘You’re wounded!’ She exclaimed, jumping down for the cot and landing on her knees before him, her hands instantly going to his stomach.
Ben sat up straight and lifted his garments so she could see the bandages around his middle.
‘The agreement was that I could stay with you if I allowed them to patch me up.’
Rey was silent for a moment. He had fought to stay with her and her friends had looked after him when she hadn’t been able to. She felt tears spring to her eyes. Maybe this was all going to be okay now. Maybe the peace she craved was slowly forming around her like a warm blanket.
Unable to hold herself back Rey pounced up from the ground and wrapped her arms around Ben’s neck, burying her face into his shoulder.
‘We did it.’ She said between sobs.
‘You did it.’ Ben said, ‘You were amazing out there. You kept me standing with your energy transfers.’
Rey blushed and sneaked a peek at Ben.
‘I didn’t know if you knew what I was doing.’
‘I knew.’ Ben replied.
They looked at each other for a moment, then Ben let out a small grunt signalling he was in pain but trying to conceal it from her, Rey quickly let go of him worried for his well being.
Rey looked around at her surroundings.
‘How did I get here?’ She asked. She found she had no memory of what had happened immediately following the battle.
‘You passed out, I carried you.’ Ben replied not meeting her eyes.
Rey’s lips parted in wonder. She couldn’t help but be affected. He had carried her all this way even though he was injured...he did care for her. This was the confirmation she had been waiting for.
‘Thank you.’ Rey said standing over Ben. Ben looked up at her.
‘Thank you for saving my life back there, and ...for saving me all those months ago when we started training together.’ He replied cautiously.
Rey’s heart hammered in her chest. A million thoughts rushed through her head. The words were on the tip of her tongue, if there was ever a time she was going to confess how she felt surely this was….
‘You need to rest.’ Ben said.
Rey’s shoulders dropped. He didn’t want her to say it. Was he trying to let her down easy?
Rey nodded and returned to the cot behind her. As the adrenaline rush wore off, she found that she was unable to keep herself awake any longer. She lay down her head and closed her eyes then felt his hand on her forehead. He ran soft fingers down her cheek.
‘Sleep well Rey.’ He said.
Half asleep, Rey’s defences were down and she couldn’t stop the words that came out of her mouth.
‘Ben, you can rest now too. Lay down with me. Please.’
She heard some mumbling and fumbling but didn’t catch anything else that happened as she slipped into a deep, heavy sleep.
**********
Rey awoke much later. She sensed the ship was moving. They must have left the planet. How on earth had she not woken up during take off? Had she ever been this tired? She tried to think of a time she had slept so soundly….
There was a grunt behind her, and a strong arm wrapped around her waist and pulled her towards a very warm chest. Rey almost yelped in surprise then covered her mouth and giggled to herself as she realised what was happening. She slowly twirled around to face her bedfellow. Squashed onto the cot next to her looking like a saber cat in a tiny cage, was Ben. Rey smiled and suppressed a laugh. Her heart exploded with joy. He had stayed with her, just as she had asked him to and he was finally sleeping.
Rey has never seen Ben rest. All those times their force bond had connected Ben was always awake, pacing the floor, planning the attack, training, or sometimes just waiting for her. From the ever present dark circles under his eyes, Rey had long suspected Ben had given up trying to drift off. Yet here he was curled around her, sound asleep. She wanted to reach out and run a hand through his tangled dark curls, for sometime she had longed to touch them, but she was afraid the contact would wake him.
‘It’s okay. go ahead.’ Ben said with his eyes still closed.
With the consent she craved provided, Rey tentatively reached a hand forward and ran her fingers through Ben’s hair. His eyes stayed closed but she felt his heart speed up through the bond. She settled her hand on his cheek.
‘Why did she stay with me?’ She asked.
‘Because you asked me to, and because…because I wanted to.’
Rey pulled in a shaky breath just as Ben finally opened his eyes and looked at her. Rey searched his eyes for the answers she seeked, she searched for the acceptance she had always longed for, she searched for the family she hoped she had finally found. She opened her mouth to speak again but Ben suddenly lunged towards her and pressed his lips to hers.
Rey’s hand slipped from his cheek to the back of his head and she moaned softly as Ben’s lips crashed against her own. The kiss was desperate and filled with weeks of pent up emotions from all those training sessions they had concluded drenched in sweat but unsatisfied, all those times Ben had treated her wounds and his fingers had lingered just a little longer than was necessary, all those flashes of inappropriate images they had inadvertently sent to each other, both wondering if the other felt the same.
Between urgent kisses, Ben peppered her with answers to her unspoken questions,
‘Yes Rey, I’m it. I’m your family, I am your belonging, as you are mine. Be with me. Please. Say you’re mine. I need you to say you’re mine. Please.’
‘I am.’ Rey said breathlessly as Ben kissed a trail down her neck. ‘I am yours.’
Ben pulled away and looked at her with swollen lips and predatory eyes.
‘Mine.’ He said before he joined their lips once more.
Despite Rey’s willingness, Ben didn’t go any further that night as he knew there were others onboard and he wouldn’t share Rey with anyone. When she was finally underneath him and crying out his name, it would be for his ears only.
Instead they lay in each other’s arms and talked about the future. They talked about the joining of their opposing forces and the end of the now meaningless war, they talked about their pasts and their mutual sadness they hoped was behind them, but above all, they talked about their feelings for one another. Without the sense of impending danger hanging over them, they were finally free to reveal how they really felt for one another, and each of them was overjoyed in turn to discover that they had shared the same strong attraction all this time but been afraid to reveal it.
‘I thought I was the only one.’ Rey said shyly.
‘As did I.’ Ben confessed.
‘Can we promise one thing from here on out? Can we be honest with each other? Always?’
‘Always.’ Ben agreed kissing the back of her hand to seal his vow.
Rey sighed happily enclosed within Bens arms and closed her eyes. In her sleepy contentment she didn’t realise the words had slipped out of her mouth until it was too late.
‘I love you Ben.’
She felt Ben kiss her forehead as she started to doze.
‘I love you too, my Rey.’ He whispered back.
**********