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The screams woke Ethan out of a dead sleep.
He would like to say that that was a Parent Thing; but if he was being honest, it was something he’d just gotten accustomed to over the last month.
After Jason had died, Shaun had had his fair share of nightmares. Ethan had missed many of them, having been in the hospital for a time afterwards- Grace had been the one to tell him about them. And then there had been the relatively rapid disintegration of his marriage to Grace, which he suspected had caused Shaun to shrink into the background and draw as little attention to himself as possible. So at the end of the day, Ethan hadn’t seen much of the more obvious fallout from Shaun’s first, biggest trauma.
But he was sure seeing the fallout from this one.
Logically, Ethan knew that Shaun was fine, that someone wasn’t in his room trying to take him again. But it didn’t make him any calmer when he awoke to the sound of his son’s screaming, and it didn’t make him move any slower when he got out of bed to go tend to him. After all, Ethan knew everything was okay: But until he was awake and calm, Shaun was under the impression that it was all real- and he was utterly, utterly terrified of it.
And that was an unbearable thought for Ethan.
Tonight, Ethan was careful to hustle a little more cautiously. This new apartment of theirs had an entirely different layout from their original home, or the sad one Ethan had acquired after his divorce from Grace, and on previous occasions Ethan had stubbed his toe, hip-checked a table, or misjudged the doorframe and whacked his shoulder. This time, he managed the journey with only a mild scrape against the partially-open door to Shaun’s bedroom.
In bed, Shaun was thrashing and crying and tangled up in the sheets. Ethan knew from previous occasions that he was dreaming of the water again, struggling to stay afloat in spite of the exhaustion and hunger and fear of being trapped. Frankly, Ethan thought it was a miracle that Shaun hadn’t drowned accidentally even before the rainwater was high enough to overtake him. It made him infinitely less willing to complain about his ruined finger and the hundreds of aches and pains he’d received as a result of the trials.
“Shaun,” Ethan said, catching one of Shaun’s hands and holding it carefully. Not too tight: Trying to restrain him before he was awake only made it worse, because in the dream-state Shaun losing his ability to move his arms only heightened the terror. “Shaun, buddy, it’s okay, you’re okay.”
It took a moment, then another, and then one more until Shaun was fully awake. The struggling had slowed to a stop and then he’d gone limp, almost appearing to be asleep again: Then his eyes had opened wide, and Shaun had started slightly when he saw Ethan sitting beside him. “Dad?”
Ethan smiled. “Hey,” he whispered, ruffling Shaun’s hair. “You were having another nightmare.”
“I know.” Shaun’s eyes were so serious. Since Jason’s death, it was rare to see the carefree exuberance that used to be so typical of him. Ethan hoped to change that with time, but first they had to work with this.
“Was it the water again?”
“Yeah.”
Always the water; sometimes the playground where the “police officer” had approached him, taken him away in his car, but definitely, always the water. Always the freezing water threatening to drown him if he fell asleep and failed to keep his head up. Always the water, growing higher and higher and higher until he couldn’t shut his eyes without it overwhelming him. Always the water, suffocating him into darkness.
Ethan had his own nightmares: Ones where he pulled Shaun from the hole only to find that he was beyond help, that he had failed to save another son. He dealt with them by remembering that Shaun was asleep in a room nearby, warm and breathing and shaken, but safe.
He hoped that Shaun felt the same: That when he awoke from his nightmares that he remembered that his dad was close at hand, ready to protect.
“You want me to stick around for a bit?”
Shaun nodded, eyes wide and owlish. “Yeah.”
“Okay.”
Ethan sat on the edge of the bed, rubbing Shaun’s arm until his eyes drifted shut and his breathing steadied out again. This was good: He rarely had more than one nightmare a night. He would probably be okay now.
Still, Ethan stayed for a time.
He knew Shaun was nearby, but it was still good to see him.
Still good to be certain.
-End