Work Text:
i do not know how to write any of this lightly.
how to carve away at words like marble, turning daggers and punches into wax seals and flower stems.
i do not want my words to hurt.
i don't know if extending sentences and turning short lines into stretched sentences will help,
but i'll still try.
perhaps my fingertips will smooth the edges of the knives i've fashioned, rearranging words until they look more like light than shadow.
i am used to writing how i feel, and i don't know how to write a hurricane into a rain shower.
these words are honey and brown sugar, but they feel like stones before they're tumbled.
i will use words like sunset and lavender and petrichor, but i don't know if they will be able to filter feelings into glowing metaphors and flower petals.
i don't exactly know what is beginning or ending, i just know that everything changed.
i have noticed that floating in space is quiet, walking on the edge between calming and unsettling.
feelings are hard to express in tangible words.
i would like to press apologies into flowers.
sealing apologies into the pages of my favorite books, pressing them in with the weight of guilt
placing a bouquet of mixed emotions into your hands simply because it's easier than words.
this may be the closest i'll get to that and i can only hope that these words will mean something.
i am letting your apologies coat my hands, slowly dripping off like honey. i like to believe that this time, you are telling the truth.
i do not think i can heal the bruises left by scathing statements in one poem, but i hope this is better than nothing.
apologies have settled into the space between my ribs and i cannot express how much i mean them.