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“Jaemin!” Donghyuck screamed.
Jaemin wailed in pain at Donghyuck’s voice, his ears amplifying the sound. His whole body felt like it was burning. He could feel his energy leaving him. He was starving.
“Jaemin, oh my God,” Donghyuck dropped down next to him, “What happened to you?”
“Hunters,” Jaemin groaned, “Policy says they can’t kill me because of how new I am, but they sure as hell can torture me.”
“It’s okay,” Donghyuck said, hugging him, “I’m here now.”
Jaemin’s stomach recoiled as he shoved Donghyuck away, using every bit of focus to not accidentally throw Donghyuck into the wall with his strength.
“Don’t,” Jaemin croaked, “I can’t have you close to me.”
“What did they do to you?” Donghyuck’s voice was sad.
“They threw holy water on me, burned me with crosses, and stabbed me with silver swords. I can’t heal properly because I haven’t eaten in weeks,” Jaemin told him weakly, his mind replaying everything he’s been through, “I would’ve rather been killed.”
“Jaemin,” Donghyuck slowly moved closer, reaching his arm towards Jaemin, “Please let me hold you.”
Jaemin shook his head, “I’m starving, Donghyuck. You’re only making it worse.”
“Let’s get you something to eat,” Donghyuck tried.
Jaemin shook his head, “It’s hopeless. There’s nothing to eat around here for miles, it’s completely barren. I won’t make it with how weak I am before the hunters just catch me again. Donghyuck, please just go. I don’t want you caught up in this. There is no policy for not killing young witches.”
“I’m not leaving you here,” Donghyuck shook his head, “If you eat, do you think you could heal enough to get to safety?”
“Yes,” Jaemin said, “but I told you already.”
Donghyuck bared his neck to Jaemin. Jaemin’s fangs popped out and a growl tore its way through his throat before he could stop either of them. He threw himself back against the wall, trying to slow his breathing down. “Donghyuck,” Jaemin’s breathing was labored, “What the fuck are you doing?”
“Eat,” Donghyuck said simply.
“No,” Jaemin shook his head, covering his nose with his hand, “I refuse to feed from you. I swore I would never do that to you and I intend to keep that promise.”
“I know you did,” Donghyuck nodded, “and I’m asking you to break it. You’re not breaking that promise on your own, I’m telling you to feed. You need to. Let me help you.”
“Donghyuck,” Jaemin voice cracked, his fangs throbbing in his gums, “I don’t want to hurt you.”
“You won’t; I trust you,” Donghyuck continued to show his neck, turning his head even further to make the space more open.
“I don’t trust me,” Jaemin nearly screamed, “I’m starving. If I start… If I start, I’m not sure I’ll be able to stop.”
Donghyuck walked to sit down directly in front of Jaemin, “Look at me. I believe in you. You won’t hurt me. You couldn’t. Please, it’s the only way.”
Jaemin sighed, “Not from your neck.”
“Why not?” Donghyuck raised an eyebrow, “It’s more efficient and easier for you.”
“I will end up killing you,” Jaemin said, “I know in the state I’m in if I’m using your neck I will tear your artery without even blinking an eye. It’s too close, I can smell too much there. I know I won’t be able to stop.”
“Jaemin, you’re scaring me,” Donghyuck said.
“Good, you should be. Maybe you will think twice about doing this,” Jaemin said harshly.
“No, I won’t change my mind. You have to,” Donghyuck said.
Jaemin nodded. He picked up a silver knife that was laying on the floor. He clenched his teeth, trying not to scream as the silver burned him. He dropped it in Donghyuck’s lap, taking in a staggering breath as the pain turned into a dull ache. “I’m going to use your wrist, you have to tell me when to stop. If I start taking too much, you can easily take your arm away from my grasp. Much easier than if I was attached to your neck. If I start taking too much, and you can’t get your arm away, I want you to put that knife in my heart without hesitation and then run.”
“Jaemin, no,” Donghyuck said quickly.
“Donghyuck,” Jaemin growled, “This is serious. I mean it. Do you understand what you have to do?”
“Yes, but-” Donghyuck started.
“Can you agree to those terms or not?” Jaemin cut him off.
Donghyuck slowly nodded.
Jaemin’s hands were shaking as he picked up Donghyuck’s wrist and slowly brought it closer to him. Jaemin swallowed, trying to regain control. “Are you ready?”
Donghyuck nodded.
“I love you,” Jaemin said softly.
Donghyuck touched Jaemin’s cheek gently, “I love you too.”
Jaemin bit down on Donghyuck’s wrist, blood immediately filling his mouth. Donghyuck winced at the sharp pain from the puncture. The feeling of his blood being slowly drained from him felt strange. Jaemin’s grip on his arm got tighter and tighter, the fangs going deeper, the blood being sucked out faster. Donghyuck saw Jaemin’s skin start to look healthier and brighter before he felt himself get lightheaded.
“Jaemin, stop,” Donghyuck told him.
Jaemin didn’t stop though. He gripped Donghyuck’s arm tighter, growling as he continued to drink. Donghyuck couldn’t get his arm away and Jaemin was drinking faster. A tear slowly rolled down Donghyuck’s cheek as he picked up the knife. He held the side of the blade against Jaemin’s neck. Jaemin jumped back, hissing at the burn. Donghyuck pointed the knife at Jaemin, “Are you done?”
Jaemin slowly came back to his senses, his fangs retracting. Jaemin took one look at the knife in Donghyuck’s hand, paler than usual tone to his skin, and the blood trickling down his arm from the two puncture wounds. As Jaemin realized what he had done, he felt his stomach turn. He really was a monster. “I’m sorry,” Jaemin whispered. Before Donghyuck could say anything, Jaemin was out of the cellar and running as far and as fast as he could.
Fifteen minutes of sprinting later, he found himself four towns over, hungry again. Using his super-speed drained whatever energy he had gotten from Donghyuck, not enough to sustain him. He stopped in the middle of the woods, listening. Five miles to his left he heard something. He ran that direction coming face to face with a bear. “I’m sorry,” Jaemin told it, right before drinking it lifeless.
He got himself cleaned up before heading into town, trying to find a kind enough stranger to help him. “Excuse me, sir,” Jaemin said softly, “Can you point me in the direction of Capetown?”
“Kid, that’s about 50 miles north of here,” the man said, “You don’t look in good enough shape to get there on your own.”
“It’s okay,” Jaemin told him, “I can manage.”
“Nonsense,” he shook his head, “I was headed up there this afternoon to pick up a fish import. Let’s get you something to eat and I’ll take you up there. You can help me load the fish in my cooler to pay me back.”
Jaemin nodded, “Thank you.”
“What’s your name?” the man walked him inside the diner.
“Jaemin. Yours?”’
“Heechul,” he smiled, “Pleasure to meet you.”
“You too,” Jaemin nodded.
Jaemin didn’t say anything as he ate, too busy eating as much as he could. Human food didn’t help satisfy his hunger much, but at least it was something. He scarfed down as much food as Heechul bought him.
“You must’ve been hungry,” Heechul teased.
“Yeah,” Jaemin said pointedly, “I was.”
Heechul started his truck towards Capetown, some folk song Jaemin felt familiar with playing on the radio.
“So what’s your business in Capetown anyway?” Heechul asked, “Especially all on your own.”
Jaemin shrugged.
“You know the superstitions, right?” Heechul asked, “It’s a haven to supernatural creatures.”
Jaemin nodded.
Heechul could see the serious and determined look on Jaemin’s face from his peripheral. “What are you?” Heechul asked.
“What?” Jaemin’s eyes widened.
“Don’t play dumb. You’re a kid all by yourself, exhausted and injured, immediately looking for solace in Capetown even though you knew the rumors, which are actually true. So what are you?” Heechul asked again.
Jaemin sighed, popping out his fangs for show. He retracted them quickly.
“Oh kid,” Heechul frowned, “What happened to you? Things were supposed to be looking up for vampires out in the real world.”
Jaemin shrugged, “There are still hunters. I got caught. My boyfriend found me three weeks after I was taken. He tried to help me and I almost killed him. So I ran.”
“It’s not your fault,” Heechul said gently, “Those hunters know what they’re doing. They pushed you to the edge, you weren’t yourself. You can’t blame yourself for that.”
Jaemin’s tears burned his cheeks, “He told me to stop. He had to use a silver knife on me to get me to stop drinking even though he told me to stop because I wouldn’t let go. That’s entirely my fault.”
Heechul sighed and shook his head, knowing when to stop. Jaemin wasn’t going to hear anything else other than his own self-deprecating monologue. “Do you have anyone to stay with? Any money?” Heechul asked.
Jaemin shook his head, “Everything I own is in mine and Donghyuck’s apartment. I’m not sure if Jaehyun still lives up here anymore. I just knew I needed to get here and I would figure it out when I arrived.”
“My younger brother may have an open room in his hotel,” Heechul told him, “Yunho is really good at taking in strays. He wouldn’t have picked up his husband, Changmin, if he wasn’t.”
Jaemin chuckled. It was the first time he had laughed in weeks.
“Can I ask what they are?” Jaemin asked.
“Yunho is a griffin; Changmin is a merman,” Heechul answered, “Changmin washed up essentially on Yunho’s back porch. Yunho saved him, helped him get on his feet and after Changmin got his bearings on his own they got together. It was very sweet, they’ve been married for five years.”
Jaemin smiled, “I’m happy for them.”
“Me too,” Heechul nodded. “You know,” he started, “Changmin almost killed Yunho once as well. The important thing is that he didn’t and sure there was some talking and healing that had to be done, but they did it. Maybe it would work out the same with you and Donghyuck.”
“No,” Jaemin shook his head, “It won’t.”
Heechul sighed, “Okay.”
“I know you must think I’m just some dumb and dramatic kid, but I just,” Jaemin sighed, “I just can’t be around him knowing the harm I did; knowing that I could have done even worse. How can I put him through that danger? How can I, feeling the way I do about him, subject him to that? They were right. I’m a monster. I’m a predator. I’m a killer. I’m pure evil. I don’t deserve happiness. I don’t deserve Donghyuck. I should’ve died when my humanity and soul did the first time. I wish the vampire that turned me had just drained me instead.”
Heechul felt his heart shatter for Jaemin. He couldn’t imagine not only the physical torture but the emotional torture as well that the hunters must’ve put Jaemin through. Heechul patted Jaemin’s shoulder, “The only evil ones are those hunters, I promise. I hope you find some happiness in Capetown. I hope you let yourself heal emotionally from this trauma. I hope you learn to love your life again. You deserve a second chance Jaemin, everyone does.”
Jaemin looked out of the window, watching the scenery go by, wondering how someone like him could deserve any semblance of something good.
Heechul pulled them into a semicircle shaped driveway in front of a large old manor.
“This is a hotel?” Jaemin raised his eyebrow.
“In a way,” Heechul told him, “This manor has been in the family for generations. As Yunho was the only one of us since the original owners to be supernatural, he inherited it. He didn’t like how big and empty it was so he started opening up the spare rooms for others to stay in for however long they need.”
“Thank you, Heechul,” Jaemin smiled weakly.
“Come on,” Heechul opened his door, “Let’s get you introduced.”
Jaemin nodded, getting out of the car, trailing behind Heechul with heavy feet.
Heechul rang the doorbell, and old bell tower sound making its way through the house and muffled through the heavy front doors. After a few moments, the door was pulled open, smoother and less creaky than Jaemin thought it would be, a tall and pleasant looking man smiled widely at them. Well, at Heechul.
“Heechul,” he shouted, picking up his older brother in a bone-crushing hug, “It’s been so long. I was starting to think you’d forgotten about me.”
“Oh, psh, never,” Heechul rolled his eyes, “Just trying not to be that overbearing older brother and let you do your thing.”
“You’re welcome anytime,” Yunho hugged him tighter, then noticed Jaemin over his shoulder, “Who’s this?”
“This,” Heechul stepped back, putting his hand on Jaemin’s shoulder, “is Jaemin. He’s a young vampire and is hoping you have a spare room for him to stay in.”
“What’s your story?” Yunho asked Jaemin.
“Hunters tortured me for weeks and then I almost killed the only person who’s ever really loved me despite what I am. So I came here. Hopefully to start again and to not hurt anyone else. I just want to live peacefully.”
Yunho looked him over, analyzing him and his words. His features softened, “Left staircase, third floor, last door in the hallway on your left. It has a beautiful view of the back garden and a straight path to the woods for hunting. I’m assuming you prefer animals to people.”
Jaemin nodded at that.
Yunho smiled, “If you want to join the set meal times, breakfast is 8:00, lunch is at 1:00, and dinner is at 7:00, but you’re free to do your own thing. Changmin can prepare things with a little extra iron, protein, and salt in them to help with your… cravings.”
“That would be really nice,” Jaemin smiled.
Heechul handed Jaemin some cash, “Get yourself some clothes, toiletries, and other essentials you’ll need as soon as possible. Then I want you to get yourself a job and start living. You’re not a monster nor evil, don’t let yourself succumb to those lies. You can stay here as long as you like, but you can’t stay holed up forever. You have to live your life. Can you promise me that?”
Jaemin nodded, “Thank you.”
“Of course, kid,” Heechul hugged him, “I’ll come to check up on you next time I’m in town.”
Jaemin smiled, “Okay.”
“Welcome home, Jaemin,” Yunho lead him inside, “You’ll be safe here. No one will hurt you again. The only person that can hurt you is yourself if you refuse to let yourself see yourself as someone good again. What you went through must’ve been traumatic. We have a counseling center with wonderful therapists in the center of town on the main road. You should go see about setting up appointments. They can help you, I promise.”
“I don’t know,” Jaemin shrugged, “Isn’t that kind of weak?”
“Seeing someone and talking to someone about your emotional traumas and needs isn’t weak. It takes incredible strength to talk to someone, to tell someone what you’ve been through, to relive those memories. I promise you, it will help you. That’s what we’re all about here. This whole town is set up to help people like us. Take advantage of the services we have. I still go to therapy sessions every Wednesday at 11:00 am. It really helps, even if there are no more pressing traumas, but you have that and I really think it would be good to get help.”
“Okay, fine,” Jaemin agreed, “I’ll go.”
“I’ll leave you to it to get settled,” Yunho smiled, handing Jaemin his number, “If you ever need anything don’t hesitate to give me a call, or even just shout for me, I’m always around. I am here to protect and help our kind. No matter what.”
“Thank you, Yunho,” Jaemin smiled, “This means a lot to me. I’m gonna check out my room, then head into town and start living the best I can.”
“That’s all I and Heechul ask of you. Just do your best,” Yunho smiled, “Hopefully you’ll make it back before dinner. Changmin always does something extra special for the first meal of a new guest.”
“I’ll be here,” Jaemin told him.
“Now go,” Yunho smiled, “I’ll be in my office, which is open at all hours if you ever need anything at all, it’s connected to the observatory on the ground floor in the back of the building.”
Jaemin nodded, quickly making his way up to his room. He looked around at the simple but cozy room; it really did feel like home. The window let in lots of natural sunlight, making Jaemin feel happy, but it quickly turned sad when he remembered the only reason he was able to enjoy sunlight was because of Donghyuck’s spell that helped him adjust to a daytime schedule by making his eyes adjust better to daylight than nighttime. He saw as a human.
Jaemin sighed, trying to push Donghyuck out of his mind. He followed the road signs to the main road and all the way to the town center. The first thing he did was find the counseling center. Maybe it really would help him, and Jaemin needed all the help he could get.
“Hi,” Jaemin’s voice was small as he caught the attention of the lady at the desk, “I’m new in town and I’d like to set up an appointment.”
“Of course, sweetheart,” shed smiled, handing him a clipboard with a stack of papers on it, “Fill this out, and I’ll get you scheduled as soon as there’s an opening.”
Jaemin took the clipboard and a pen and sat on a chair facing the window. He filled out the paperwork, occasionally glancing out of the window to watch the happenings of the town go on. Maybe Jaemin could really be happy here. He would always have an empty hole in his heart, a hole shaped like Donghyuck where his boyfriend was missing, but knowing Donghyuck was safer without him and Jaemin was here healing wounds that desperately needed it. Things would just have to be okay the way they were. Maybe eventually things would be more than just okay, but just okay would have to be a start. It’s where all things started. And if it turned out to be only okay for the rest of eternity, perhaps okay really isn’t that bad.