Work Text:
"I love you, Saitama."
You stared at yourself straight in the eye in front of the mirror filled with sheer determination before screaming and blushing in embarrassment. You have been telling yourself the same statement in front of the mirror for as long as you can remember. The name you just mentioned--"Saitama"--was your childhood friend and schoolmate since elementary school. The two of you were often bullied, and so you eventually found comfort in one another one day. As years passed by, your feelings for the man grew with each passing day, and it intensified during your high school days with him. You have always planned on confessing your feelings for the man, but you knew that he will not take you seriously; he never did, anyway. He was always lost in his own little world, and he did once mention to you that he was not interested in dating. However, you still wanted to tell him what you really felt for him. You have been stopping yourself because of various reasons, and that included the fact that you did not want to be a distraction for his career as a hero, and that you did not want your friendship to be ruined just because of something as simple as a proclamation of love.
You groaned as you threw yourself in your bed, rolling over from side to side. You wanted to tell him so badly, and it's already been so many years since you have planned on telling him. The two of you were already consenting adults, so what was stopping you? Saitama was not a bad person, but he was not entirely good either. You accepted the fact that there was a possibility of him rejecting you. You sniffed as you held back your tears in anger and confusion. Your eyes darted towards the picture frame on your bedside cabinet, seeing a snapshot of you and Saitama during junior high school. He still had a full head of hair, and he looked quite adorable with his signature neutral expression. You find yourself smiling and forgetting your frustration over confessing your feelings to Saitama.
However, when you took your phone out of your pocket to check the message Saitama sent you a few minutes ago, your smile faded into a frown. Your chest felt heavy with anxiety and your mind with confusion. If only you could tell him what you really felt through text, but you knew that that would be rude and unbecoming of you. In addition, there's a high chance that Saitama would not reply to your message.
come over for hotpot 2nite
Sender: Saitama
It was Saitama's message to you every week during Sunday, since Sunday was your only rest day from work. You usually did hotpot with his disciple named "Genos", but there were times when he was not around because of hero work. Genos usually did the housework for Saitama, making him more of a housemaid rather than a disciple. You asked Saitama if he really took Genos in, but Saitama insisted that the guy was just someone who came to his apartment one day and asked to be his "Teacher." You did not ask for more, knowing full well that they had a rather complex relationship as Teacher-Disciple.
You took a bath and wore your best and most comfortable clothes, especially since winter was arriving earlier than anyone expected. You cautiously walked down the streets of City Y, the city where you grew up in, making sure no one saw you cross the border between City Y and City Z. When Saitama's apartment appeared in your field of vision, you felt relieved that you did not encounter a single monster on your way.
"Oh, what do we have here?"
You stand corrected.
You turned your head to see a vending machine with muscular arms and legs approaching you. The monster had elongated eyes coming from the mirror of the vending machine, and its mouth had glass shards instead of teeth. You gulped and took a step back, but the monster took a menacing step towards you.
Vending Machine Monster
Threat Level: Tiger
"It's rare to see someone cross the border to visit this ghost town!" exclaimed the monster. "You must be looking for danger! No one's around here to save you!"
"U-Um..." was all you could say.
"I used to be a human being addicted to eating stuff from vending machines until I became one! Since no one's out here to save you, then I'm going to eat you--!"
Before the monster could even take another step towards you, the monster blew into a million pieces. Its blood and internal organs splattered about, dyeing your clothes a bright red color. You screamed, remembering that you wore your best clothes for this very occasion. Not that your looks really mattered to Saitama, but you wanted to look your best for tonight.
You planned on confessing your feelings for him, after all.
Your eyes widened at the sight before you; Saitama stood a few feet away with his fist nonchalantly in the air, wearing nothing but pajamas and slippers. You had to admit, he still looked cute to you regardless of what he wore.
"Man, talk about annoying," said Saitama in his usual monotone. "You okay?"
You nodded shakily. "Y-Yeah... I'm glad you got here in time, Saitama."
Saitama proceeded to crouch and grab the bags of chips from the Vending Machine Monster scattered about. You wondered why Saitama stared at each of them intently.
"Aw, man!" exclaimed Saitama, visibly annoyed. "They're all expired! I was thinking they would be good snacks after dinner..."
"I see," you said, chuckling. "What were you doing outside, Saitama? Aren't you supposed to be preparing for hotpot?"
"I wanted to pick you up," replied Saitama.
You blushed. "Wha--? W-Why? You shouldn't have troubled yourself with--"
"I know this place is infested with monsters, and I know you won't get lucky every time," explained Saitama, picking up a few bags of chips. "Hey, some of these are actually still viable..."
You smiled. He has always been that kindhearted boy you have known since elementary school. During elementary, he usually offered to give you his lunch whenever your parents forgot to prepare yours. You often denied his offers, making him look embarrassed and annoyed at the same time. One day though, you recall being so hungry that could not even stand up from your own seat in class. Expecting that Saitama would stop offering his lunch, he still did that day. You recall his lunch being hot dogs shaped like octopuses and rice balls. They tasted nice. You recall asking him if he was the one who prepared them. He told you that he was. Ever since that day, the two of you grew closer to one another.
"Is Genos home?" you asked, honestly hoping he was not home.
Saitama shook his head. "Nah, he's got some business to attend to with Dr. Kuseno. Something about an upgrade."
You nodded. You recall the first time you met Genos. He was heavily wounded, his right arm ready to fall off if he took another step. He explained that a "Dr. Kuseno" always did his upgrades to improve his physical strength and durability. Genos was handsome, but he was still far-off from being completely human. He used to be human, but it seems he has been deprived of human emotions ever since his parents passed away. He was kind, but he was straightforward. He recalls being hostile towards you because he wondered why Saitama was living with someone who was not a hero. You told him that you were childhood friends with Saitama, which made him suddenly grow interested in you. This knowledge alone made him interview you about Saitama and the training he has done to achieve the godlike powers he has in the present.
"Thanks for saving me from that monster earlier, Saitama," you said, smiling.
"It's no big deal," said Saitama, scratching the back of his neck. "It was like dealing with an ant, so..."
"What kind of snacks did the monster leave behind?" you asked.
Saitama held out a few bags of renowned chips called "Patatata Chips." You nodded.
"They're supposed to be good, but I've never ate one," explained Saitama.
"They look good," you said, nodding. "Let's eat them after dinner!"
"Yeah..."
When the two of you finally arrived at Saitama's apartment, Saitama quickly began to prepare the hotpot. You sat in his living room slash bedroom, looking around. Nothing really changed, since you usually come by every week. You noticed a couple of open manga on his bed, and you eventually noticed that his bed was a little messy. Saitama was not the type to apologize for something so natural, but you could let this one go. It did no harm to you, anyway. Saitama's TV was on, and the news was on. The news reporter talked about Amai Mask's new concert set for next week and tickets were already sold out.
Looking around further, you could see a picture frame on the computer table beside the TV. You stood up and decided to take a closer look. You have never seen a single picture frame in Saitama's home ever since he moved in this abandoned apartment complex. You picked up the picture frame and scanned the contents. You blushed when you noticed that it was the same photograph that you had in your home. It was you and Saitama during junior high school. You turned to look at Saitama, who was cooking in the kitchen, a small smile spread across his face. He looked like he was enjoying what he was doing. You could not help but smile when you saw his smiling face.
"I didn't know you kept this photograph with you," you told him.
"Ah, I found it lying on the floor one day," said Saitama nonchalantly. "It would be a waste if I threw it away, so I framed it."
You smiled, feeling giddy on the inside.
"I happen to have the same photograph back home," you said.
"Oh? That's cool."
Silence. It was not an awkward one but rather, a comforting one. Even though Saitama rarely says anything out of the ordinary, silence with him was comfortable. Maybe it is because you like him so much to the point that his flaws were immune to you, but it is just what you felt.
You walked over to the door leading to the kitchen and leaned on the doorway. You watched as Saitama began mixing the ingredients for hotpot, completely oblivious of your presence. When Saitama turned to grab one of the ingredients beside him, that was when he noticed you. You gave him the brightest smile that you could manage.
"You should wait back there," said Saitama. "I'm still not done."
"It's okay," you insisted. "I'm getting kind of bored, anyway. I just want to talk to you."
"Oh, okay. What did you want to talk about?"
Honestly, you just wanted to come out of the closet and tell him how much you love him ever since elementary school, but you knew that the atmosphere was too bare to even begin such a conversation. You began recalling the time you realized you were falling him for him. It was junior high school when the bullying in school intensified. Saitama was often bullied, and you were often bullied as well for hanging out with him. However, the differences between the bullying the two of you received was that Saitama received physical blows while you received emotional abuse from your female classmates. There would be times when Saitama would approach you with a blackeye and another one on the other eye the next day. You would always bring a first aid kit just in case he had open wounds that proved to be painful. He often told you that it did not hurt, but you knew he felt otherwise. He always puts up this strong persona, but it was impossible that he did not feel a single thing from all the punches he received throughout high school. You could not help but frown recalling all the horrible things your classmate told you about you and Saitama hanging out together. Saitama noticed the sad expression on your face and stopped cooking for a moment.
"Hey, you okay?" asked Saitama, waving his hand in front of your face.
Surprised, you met his gaze for a brief moment before nodding. You gave him the same bright smile like earlier. Saitama was not buying it. He cocked an eyebrow and frowned. He wondered what was bothering you all of a sudden.
"Something bothering you?" asked Saitama.
You looked downwards. "Just thinking about how far we've come. I'm just glad that high school was over before we even knew it."
"Oh."
Saitama knew you are not fond of your memories of high school. He did not know how to stop your bullies, because he knew being physical about it would not fix anything. From his perspective, you were the one who went through a lot compared to him. You were not capable of defending yourself back then, and so you let your anger and sadness fill your heart. You never told him about anything that bothered you because in your perspective, Saitama was having his own rough time. He did not want to keep watching you suffer, but he was not the type to force someone to tell him what they felt. He could not help but give you a slightly worried look before turning and cooking again.
"Don't you think what matters is the present?" asked Saitama.
"Huh?" You blinked your eyes twice.
"I don't think there's any point in lingering in the memories of the past," continued Saitama. "Yeah, I sure am glad that high school was done and over with. Honestly, I wouldn't have gotten through it all without you."
Saitama gave you a small smile before preparing the table for hotpot. Mesmerized by the smile he gave you, you watched his every move as he went to the living room carrying the hotpot. Saitama eventually sat down and patted the space beside him. He looked over to you with his usual blank expression.
"Come on, we should eat before it gets cold," said Saitama.
Snapping back to reality, you gave him a bright smile before sitting on the space beside him. There was something about the muffled sounds coming from the television and the warm steam coming from the hotpot that made this dinner with Saitama even more romantic. You wanted to consider this as a date with Saitama, but he would just outright insist that it was just dinner with his childhood friend and nothing more. You watched as Saitama began picking out the vegetables before picking out a couple of meat. You began picking out the meat and a few vegetables that you find delicious. The two of you ate quietly before finally mustering the courage to break the ice between the two of you.
"You're really good at cooking, Saitama," you said, smiling. "I wouldn't cook something like this in my entire life."
"Well, I can teach you," said Saitama as he took a bite off of the meat with his chopsticks.
"Thanks, that would be awesome."
"Oh, I didn't get to apologize for your clothes. I'm sorry."
You looked down at your clothes and noticed the dried up splatter of blood. You gave him a forced smile before sighing to calm yourself down. Saitama noticed you have never worn something different before, and so he knew he had to apologize for it. You did not look pleased earlier when he defeated the monster, and it stirred something akin to embarrassment and guilt when he saw you frantically looking at your clothes. He wanted to tell you that you looked nice in it, but seeing you covered in blood made him think otherwise. You might get angry at him for saying something anticlimactic.
"Oh, don't worry about it!" you said, laughing. "I can just wash this off."
"I'll wash them for you, if you want," offered Saitama. "You know, to make up for what I did to it."
You blushed. "Oh, no! That wouldn't be necessary!"
The two of you ate again quietly. You kept peeking at Saitama as he ate from his own bowl. He did not look anything different from what he looked like back then, and the only difference is him being bald. When you finised your own bowl of hotpot, you continued staring at Saitama. He looked busy eating his own dinner. You suddenly recalled the statement you told yourself in the mirror just earlier. Was tonight the right time to tell him something so out of place from your usual conversation with the man?
You sighed as you played with the chopsticks in your bowl. There have been countless times that you have wanted to tell Saitama what you felt, but you were somehow always unlucky. During high school, someone would call him in class all of a sudden before you could even tell him what you really wanted to tell him. When he would come back and ask what you were going to say, you would always shake your head and tell him your forgot. Also, there was a time when the two of you were walking back home from school and you decided that you wanted to finally tell him you liked him. However, a monster appeared out of nowhere and Saitama urged you to run away as he tried to fend off the monster. In the end, of course, he was beaten quite badly and you had to tend to his wounds when you came back for him. You wondered if this silence between the two of you should be filled with the words of love that you have always wanted to tell him ever since you were young.
"Hey, Saitama--"
"Hmm?"
Saitama, who had his mouth and cheeks full with meat, looked at you with a curious look. You grabbed at the sleeve of his pajama with your thumb and index finger like a child. You wanted to tell him badly. You have always been preparing yourself for the perfect moment to tell him. Now was surely the time.
Saitama gulped down his food.
"Is there something wrong?" asked Saitama.
"There's something that I've always wanted to tell you for a long time," you told him.
Saitama did not react for a few seconds before slightly tilting his head.
"What's it?"
"Well, I... Um... I've always..."
"You've always what?"
"Er..."
Saitama placed his bowl on the table and fully turned to you. You did not want him to see your blushing face, but he was looking at you quite intently. There was something about his look that made you even more nervous than your attempts at confessing your feelings for him back then. He was listening for the first time; maybe that was it. There were no distractions around you. All you could hear at that moment was the sound of Amai Mask's singing on TV, the whistling of the wind outside, and the boiling steam rising from the hotpot beside you. Saitama held your stare. You were sure your face was as red as a tomato at that moment.
"I've... Uh... I've always wondered what kind of girl you've wanted to date," you said, looking away from him.
"Huh," said Saitama, also shifting his gaze. "I've never been interested in dating anyone, so I wouldn't know."
"W-Well, what if you were ever given the chance?" you asked.
Crap, this isn't what I wanted to say, Saitama! you thought.
Saitama hummed. "If I were to date a girl, then I'd like a girl that's just like you."
NO! THAT'S NOT WHAT YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO ANSWER EITHER!
Your face was practically bright red at this point, and you had to look down to avoid Saitama's intense stare. He would... date a girl like you? Is that not a compliment? That would mean he likes a girl just like you?! What was he even trying to say there--?!
"W-WHY SOMEONE LIKE ME?!" you exclaimed.
"I don't know," said Saitama, grabbing another piece of meat from the hotpot. "I've never met other girls besides you."
Oh, so that was his reason.
Something deep inside you was somewhat disappointed with his answer. You sighed sadly, making sure it was not obvious to Saitama. You wondered why it was not as easy as you thought it was. You watched countless romantic-comedies and read various manga just to get a gist of what it is like to be in a relationship. How come it was so different with Saitama? He was not like all those typical manga boys who look and act charismatic, but there was something about his simplicity that made you fall in love with him. You always worried for him. He was always out there doing his best and training to become the best hero that the world ever had and he accomplished that. Not everyone in the entire world knew of his feats, but you were a witness to all of it. If only you could tell the entire world what Saitama was really like, but Saitama insisted to "let things go." Something about everything he says to you makes your heart flutter and your mind a mess. You kept staring at him as he ate. You did not have the appetite to eat anymore. You just wanted to tell him.
Just say it.
"Saitama, that wasn't really what I wanted to ask," you said, sighing. "I'm sorry."
"Oh, then what was it?" asked Saitama after gulping down his food.
You scooted over closer to him, making him feel nervous all of a sudden. He was good at not showing it, but he was sweating as if there was no tomorrow. He was slightly shaking, but he made sure it was not visible to you. You looked at him in the eyes and he willingly did the same. He placed his bowl on the table again and continued staring at you. You do not know, but every time you look at him, everything about him calms down. You have been looking at him that way ever since high school, and it was the same look you would give him whenever he did something reckless, like fighting off of a bully that he did not have a single chance of beating. It was also the same look you would give him whenever he had a wound that he did not want to show you because he did not want to worry you about something that was not a big deal for him.
It was a look of worry, and... care.
You eventually find yourself holding his hand. Saitama stared at it for a few seconds before looking back at you.
"I've always wanted to tell you that I love you," you said, in a whisper, making sure he was the only one who could hear you.
"Huh...?" was all he could say.
You blushed. "Don't make me say it again, Saitama..."
Everything went silent. It was as if time itself stopped for the two of you. The two of you find yourselves staring at one another. There was no urge to kiss one another, but there was an urge to tell one another what they really felt for one another. You began reminiscing about the times you attempted to confess your feelings to Saitama, but always ending up failing. You recalled all the times Saitama would sit beside you after class while you were crying your eyes out after a bully harassed you about him. He would often tell you to stop hanging out with him because he did not like seeing you cry all the time because of him. However, you always insisted on staying with him. He never protested about this because he did not want you to go either. In his perspective, something about you made his stone-like heart beat even after all the rigorous training he did to becoming the world's strongest hero. You were just different compared to anyone else.
"Just say it," you told him.
"Huh?" said Saitama, unsure of what to say.
"Just say that you don't want to be with me and I'll go."
"Oh, uh... I don't like you."
"Seriously?" You could not believe it.
"Yeah, b--"
You abruptly stood up and headed for the door. You exited his home and slammed the door behind you. Saitama stared at the door for a few seconds before standing up to clean up the hotpot that was not at all finished. He turned off the TV and closed the curtains. He did not understand why would go away all of a sudden. You did not even let him finish. He did not like you, because he loves you. He was going to make a joke, but he guessed that it was not the right time to say such foolish things. When he stared at you as you confessed your feelings for him, he noticed how troubled you looked. He should have not taken your feelings lightly like that. Now you were out on your own all alone and in a vulnerable mental state. Saitama paused for a few seconds before dashing outside his door, leaving it open.
You were nearing the border between City Y and City Z. The night was unbearably cold, but you were glad you were wearing something to fight off the cold. As you were walking, you heard heavy footsteps behind you. You did not want to look behind you, knowing it could be a monster, and so you ran with all your might. You were already crying, but you did not want to deal with another monster for tonight. You were too heartbroken to even mess with monsters. You just wanted to get away as far as possible. You did not want to come back. How could you be such a fool? You expected that he would love you back, but it was impossible. Saitama never took you seriously. Even though you always told him not to get himself beaten up by the bullies back then, he would still egg them to fight. As stupid as you were, you were always there to tend to his wounds. Now you knew; everything you ever did for him, he never appreciated them. You stopped running. You crouched and began crying out loud. You looked pathetic, but everything hurt. You did not care anymore. You loved him so much and did everything for him--
"Hey, Y/n."
You flinched. You turned your head and saw Saitama with his arm raised again and his hand balled into a fist, a dead monster right beside him. You were drowning in your own sorrows that you could not hear anything else besides your own thoughts. Saitama looked worried as he approached you. You wanted to turn and go back home as soon as possible, but there was something inside you that made you want to run and hug him tightly. When Saitama was already a few feet away from you, he noticed you were crying. Damn it, not gain, thought Saitama. It has been a while since he saw you crying, and this different feeling of frustration annoyed him. It was different from losing a game with King and listening to Genos's endless preaching of him. This was you, and you were different than them.
"Y/n--"
"Okay, I get it!" you exclaimed. "You don't like me; that's enough of an answer. Just leave me alone for now. I just want to be alone for now."
"But you didn't--"
"I want to go home."
"You didn't let me finish."
You looked at him straight in the eye. Oh, forget it. You were not going to make out a single emotion from the way he gazed at you.
"I was going to make a joke that I didn't like you but instead loved you, but you left before I could even say it."
"W-What?! You idiot!"
You were about to slam your fists on him out of frustration when he stopped them with both his hands.
"I loved you for a long time, but then I thought love is nothing but a distraction," explained Saitama. "I mean, while I was training to be a hero, I just wanted to stop my emotions from being way out in the open. A superhero isn't supposed to be vulnerable, especially psychologically, so I tried shutting those out. However, ever since we started hanging out again, you were special. I could be somehow myself again from back then whenever I'm with you."
"S-Saitama..." You blushed.
"I was honestly waiting for you to say it ever since we were in high school, since I was too... shy to tell you."
"Seriously?" you scoffed.
Saitama blushed a little. "Somehow, along the way, I forgot on planning to tell you, so... yeah. I'm glad you told me."
"You should have kept a memo," you joked, wiping away your tears.
"I should have," said Saitama, grinning in embarrassment. "But hey."
"Yeah?"
"Next time, say it more clearly."
You nodded. "Okay, then... I love you, Saitama. Now, is that better?"
Saitama nodded. "Loud and clear. I... Uh... I love you too."
You engulfed him in a tight hug. Saitama, surprised, did not return the hug. He simply began petting your head. This feeling of sheer happiness was so foreign to him that he did not know how to act.
"How about we finish that hotpot you just left?" said Saitama, slightly pulling you away.
You blushed. "O-Oh, right! I'm so sorry!"
"See? This is why we should keep our emotions in check."
"Says the one who doesn't even do it."
"Yeah, whatever. Come on, I'm still starving."
The two of you began walking back to Saitama's apartment. This time, the two of you held hands. There was something about the cold night that made everything you see seem so romantic. The ghost town looked as if it were engulfed in beautiful streetlights with Saitama right beside you. You peeked at him, seeing him looking straight ahead. You tipped your toes and gave him a quick peck on the cheek. Saitama's eyes widened, and he stopped walking for a moment. You giggled.
"Come on, don't be like that!" you told him.
"Do it again, please," said Saitama in a shaky voice.
"Eh?"
"Do it again, please," repeated Saitama.
You pecked Saitama on the cheek. He eventually did the same for you. You jumped slightly at the contact. His lips were warm and soft. You could not help but blush a bright red.
"Let's go, the hotpot's waiting," said Saitama, grabbing you by the arm and practically dragging you.
"Y-Yeah, wait a sec!"
You smiled as you watched Saitama drag you back to his place. You sighed dreamily as you looked up at the star-dotted sky.
Finally.