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One moment, she had been the same chick he had known since their first year, then she had turned to him with a small smile on her glossy lips, like she was sharing a secret between the two of them, and the glittery makeup she wore along her cheekbones shone against the lighting of the dorm and oh-
It was as though Katsuki’s heart went into overdrive as he watched her face glitter and sparkle, as his eyes watched the tug of her lips stretch her lips and make lines around her mouth.
Katsuki took a deep breath in through his nose as his lips struggled to smile back at her.
Shit. Fuck. Shit.
He- he was never really that good at emotions and figuring out how to explain them in a way that wasn’t mild or extreme anger, even towards himself, but he had calmed down enough in the past few years to fucking understand that, in the one moment, one second of a meaningless smile exchanged over their classmates stupid actions, that his emotions had grown into something new and entirely terrifying.
She smiled at him and it changed everything .
Sweat dripped down his back, causing the fabric of his tank top stick to him, but he didn’t much care as he continued through his workout. Katsuki found himself lying on the mat in the weight room, staring up ahead at the gross fucking ceiling, his breath labored as he rested from the hard workout he had made himself go through. It was all he could do to get his mind off of her . Pushing until his lungs burned and sweat made his hair wet and the knowledge that he would wake up the next day fucking sore as hell.
That might be a problem, considering he would be out with Miruko tomorrow, and that woman was fucking relentless as hell (which he loved , Miruko was a smartass, an absolute machine that worked and worked and worked and didn’t even give a shit what people thought of her, she was just there to be a hero ), but, frankly, Katsuki couldn’t give a shit about that at the moment when everytime he let his mind wander, it found its way to thinking about pink cheeks and snort-filled laughter and the way Uraraka’s arm muscles moved as she pulled her long hair into a ponytail and how she would brush her hand against his arm as she made a joke.
Fuck.
At least this was the weight room she didn’t use, no way for her to distract him with her fucking beauty- inside and out. Because- well. Uraraka had never been one to think badly of him. She had been one of the first in the class to tease him and feel comfortable around him, which had quickly earned her respect in his book and fuck had Katsuki had a crush on her all these years and was just too repressed to even realize it?
That seemed likely.
A light kick to his shin caught his attention. Katsuki blinked and glanced over at Kirishima, whose bright smile looked a little off as he watched Katsuki with worried eyes. An earbud dangled off his shoulder, the other still in his ear. “You okay man? You’ve seemed a bit out of it lately. Are you- are you sure your not overworking yourself?”
Katsuki shrugged the best he could while lying down among his sweat as his body slowly began to ache. “Going through some shit.”
“Is it your mom?” Kirishima asked as he plopped down onto the floor, legs crossed, hands fiddling with his earbuds, twisting them around and around his fingers as he looked at Katsuki with that overly worried look on his stupid face.
While Katsuki could easily lie and agree that yeah, it was his mom that had him in another emotional funk, because, really, most of the shitty moods he got into was caused by her ‘well-meaning behavior.’ Katsuki loved his mother, she had taught him how to sew and had fostered his rather punk style to some degree (only in fashion, not in a lifestyle, because the one time she had found a pack of cigs in his room that actually were not his whatsoever, she went fucking crazy on him), but there were times that the sound of her voice and being around her made him want to scream and scream and scream and break shit because he couldn’t take it, he couldn’t. When Katsuki had explained it to Kirishima, his friend had been endlessly supportive- had even let him go a few rounds against the punching bag in his room, which seemed like a godsend for his pent up aggression. The wonders of finding a hobby.
So, he could lie. But Katsuki didn’t exactly want to lie to his best friend. Not when he felt so jumbled up again over all these overwhelming oddly good emotions.
Katsuki breathed in. “Nah. Shit’s been alright with my folks. My mom’s been kind of proud of me lately, seeing me on the news with Miruko, you know?” He bit at his lip, a little unsure how to lead into I’m fucking in love with Uraraka Ochako and it’s killing me because she’s so beautiful in every way and sure we’re friends but why in the world would she want anything like what he wanted ?
Last week, he had assisted her with a villain that had gotten quite a bit of attention from the media, though they had only stayed long enough to watch as the asshole was escorted away. That night, his mom had called him and praised him before asking if he had thought on upgrading his costume for his true hero debut. It had been a nice conversation.
“But something’s bothering you?” Kirishima prompted.
Katsuki laid his arm over his face and took another breath, settling the fucking nerves that panged up his stomach. “Uraraka’s so fucking wonderful . She makes my chest burst, makes me wanna do shit and have her smile all for myself. Shit .”
“Oh!” Kirishima gave a small laugh and Katsuki could practically feel the large, warm smile that was on his best friends lips. “Have you considered telling her? I know it might seem… impossible, but you never know until you try! You remember how I was our second year when I had that crush on Yuuto? How it ate up inside of me, but I felt way better after I told him how I felt?”
How could Katsuki forget? Kirishima had been disgustingly lovesick their second year for the quirkless kid from the management department a year behind them. They had spent many lunch hours sitting with the kid and his management buddies, which had been boring until Uraraka had mentioned- with a wink sent towards Kirishima afterwards- that this was the beginning of networking and keeping people in his good graces for when they entered the hero world. Katsuki still talked to the management kids now and then, but not as frequently since Kirishima and the kid had broken up at the end of their second year.
He thought about telling Uraraka his own feelings- how much he wanted to cup her cheeks in his hands, to kiss at her lips and taste that shiny lip gloss she had taken to wearing against his own lips, to be able to hold her hand. It made his chest ache.
“I don’t know. No.” Katsuki shook his head. “It’d just make shit awkward.”
“Well… maybe try to get closer to her, maybe then something could happen? Like, um… find something you know she’d like to do and ask her to help you, you know?” Kirishima shrugged his shoulders. “Sorry, I’m not that great at romance. It’s… hard.”
Katsuki uncovered his eyes and sat up. “That management kid ain’t keeping you down is he? Cause he’s a fucking fool for breaking your heart like that and if he is, I’ll kill him for you.” He grinned wickedly, in the way that had many of his classmates shivering and wondering if he really was feral, but Kirishima and his good friends knew that (most of the time) it was for his own shit and giggles.
His best friend only laughed and shook his head as he placed an earbud back in his ear. “Mind spotting for me man?” He asked as he stood up, an audible pop sounding from his leg. Katsuki met Kirishima’s wide eyes and found himself laughing out loud along with his friend. He clung to his sides as his laughter went on and on, more than it called for, but Kirishima’s loud laugh made him laugh even further, stupid and silly.
The roof was often the place Katsuki found himself after a long day. The view wasn’t anything- nothing but the school grounds and the sky, too polluted with the light of the city to be anything less than a few stars and moving airplanes and vast nothingness. Uraraka had been the person who had shown him the roof- it had been unkempt, but she had scurried away a few blankets up there to lie on. Since then, a little garden of strawberries had shown up.
That being said, it really shouldn’t have surprised Katsuki when he opened the door to the roof and found Uraraka lying on top of a comforter, staring up at the dark sky. He didn’t speak as he lay next to her, his bare arm brushing her own.
The sky was that mix of pink and purple that Katsuki was hesitant, even to himself, to call breathtaking. It was funny- usually people saw this shit and thought of all the good times they had as a child, but as Katsuki watched the sky slowly change color, all that it brought to mind was the last few years. Walking home at sundown with Kirishima’s arm thrown around his shoulders, Miruko teasing him mercily while he pretended to hate it more than he actually did as they moved through the city, hanging out with Jirou as he tapped a beat with his drumsticks against a railing.
Through the memories that made a small smile form on his lips, he was all too aware of where his forearm was touching Uraraka. It was- nice. It was somehow terrifying, more than he ever imagined, a curling mess that was normally reserved for fuel for fights with villains that only made him feel nervous now with no outlet to let it out on. Fuck. He wanted to- to squish her cheeks or hold her hand or something stupid like that.
“Do you think aliens are real?” Her voice was so soft and full of wonder that it took a second for Katsuki to realise what she had even asked. This girl- she was so fucking ridiculous.
A grin stretched his lips as he glanced at the bright moon up above. “Fuck yeah. Why wouldn’t there be aliens? It’s fucking stupid to think out of all of the universe there’s only one planet to have life.”
Uraraka laughed quietly as she raised herself up on her elbow. “Exactly! That’s what I keep telling Deku, but somehow he is anti-alien! Can you believe that? Deku’s a skeptic! Out of all people! I knew Iida would be, but not Deku!” She had glitter on her nose. It caught his attention.
“Fucking dumbass Deku.” Escaped his lips without thought as he watched her face. Her round eyes were shining like the stars missing from the sky and he longed to trace the smile lines on her face. Instead of getting defensive of her best friend, Uraraka only laughed a little as she stared down at him. “What’s your favorite planet?” He found himself asking.
A thoughtful look crossed her face as she thought. “Venus. I have this- it’s a little silly,” a look passed over her face as she breathed in, biting slightly at her lower lip, “but I’ve been interested in love lately. Venus is named after the Roman goddess of love. I guess that’s why I like it so much. Oh! Venus is the brightest planet, you could spot it even during the day.”
“Where is Venus right now?” He asked quietly, watching the small smile on her face grow as she excitedly laid down onto her back to properly gaze at the sky up above. A part of him wanted to roll onto his side and watch her face as she searched, but he settled for the press of her arm against his as she settled back.
After a minute of searching, Uraraka gasped and pointed up, her other hand gripping at his wrist in her excitement. Katsuki’s fingers twitched. “There! Do you see it?”
Katsuki ignored the want to move his hand into hers, instead following where her hand pointed. After a few seconds of examining the sky, now dark in official night, he saw the little speck of brightness of Venus. “Yeah, yeah I see it.” He breathed in. He could smell the flowery scent of her perfume. Katsuki wanted to bury his nose in her hair. Fuck. Fuck. All he could do was want . He wasn’t brave when it came to relationships. And he had never felt anything like this before- a crush that consumed him and made him want to blush and that was so fucking stuid, yet he could feel the blood rush to the tip of his ears and his cheeks as her fingers sqeezed at his wrist and she began to speak about the stars in that quiet voice of hers, reserved for the two of them in this moment.
The cupcakes looked deformed. He wasn’t the best at getting frosting onto the damn things, and he might have poured too much batter in some of the wrappers. They looked decent enough, but it wasn’t up to the high expectation he held for his cooking skills. Katsuki sighed through his nose as he stared down at the collection of cupcakes- some too big, some too small, some with batter cooked on the side of the bright little Hello Kitty wrappers, the pink frosting messy.
Fuck it.
Wasn’t it the fucking gesture that mattered? Besides, if it was shit, Uraraka would tell him straight out. Maybe Katsuki would have to swallow his pride and ask Sato for some tips on how to properly bake. Or, he found himself blushing at the stupid thought that passed through his mind, Uraraka would offer to help him bake some more. That would be much preferred to Katsuki than forcing himself to talk to a classmate he didn’t know very well.
Katsuki placed the cupcakes all onto a large plate, braced himself, and set off towards Uraraka’s room. Fuck, he had never felt so awkward and out of depth before. There was a silent bravery to confronting these emotions that Katsuki had never known until now, as the nerves inside of him popped like tiny explosions that made him shift from foot to foot and bite at his lower lip.
Somehow, he was already in front of Uraraka’s door. Fuck fuck fuck fuck. Katsuki breathed in. No backing out, don’t be a coward. He kicked out the door, too aware that if he tried with his hands, he might just drop all of his shitty fucking cupcakes.
The door swung open. There she was- her long hair was up in a messy bun with strands curling underneath her jaw, she was wearing a stained bright pink hoodie that had Kuromi all over it, and her left eye had layers of makeup over it unlike the rest of her face. Uraraka opened her mouth and squeaked, her hands raised as though to cover up herself. She was so fucking endearing Katsuki wanted to kiss her hands.
“Ba- Bakugou! I thought you might be Tsuyu! Um! Ah!” Uraraka paused and lowered her hand, covering her mouth as she tipped her head up and sniffed, suddenly, actually, looking at him, her eyes zeroing in on the plate full of cupcakes.
Katsuki grinned, that wicked grin that had her grinning right back when she laid eyes on it. “I made them. Might be shitty, but I know you like sweets so- here.” Katsuki’s held out the plate.
Uraraka grinned up at him, the glittery pink and purple makeup on her left eye scrunching up slightly as she did, and opened her door wider in invitation. “Let’s try these little cakes together, I want to give you my live feedback! Sorry about all the makeup, I wanted to try a look. It looks bad, I know, but, ha.” She rubbed at the back of her neck as Katsuki walked past her and towards the chabudai she kept in her room. He carefully set down the plate as he pursed his lips.
“It looks pretty good to me. Though, I don’t know shit about makeup.” Fashion? He was great at that, but not makeup. Katsuki saw it and either thought it was a fucking mess, or pretty cool. On Uraraka, it just made him feel fucking warm. Even when it was only on one eye and looked a little silly. He was warm when he looked at her bright pink cheeks and the smile on her face. Katsuki turned away from her, picked up a rather large cupcake, and shoved it towards where she sat across from him.
“Thanks Bakugou. Though, you really do know shit because this,” and Katsuki turned to look at her raise a hand and gesture at her eye, “is shit.” Katsuki laughed as he unwrapped his cupcake. He glanced around her room- it had become much more lived in since their first year. Makeup palettes and brushes lined her desk, as well as a little circle shaped mirror that was smudged with pink eyeshadow. There was stationary that was objectively cute , little plush toys of Sanrio characters, which Katsuki knew a lot of their friends gifted to her when they found out she had a mild obsession with the brand. There was a print of Aphrodite standing on top of a seashell taped to the wall and cut out pictures of clothes and bands Katsuki vaguely recognized pinned to a little bulletin board.
It was, overwhelmingly, a girls room.
His hands shook as he bit into his cupcake. It was moist. It was a cupcake, nothing special, but Uraraka made a sound of excitement from where she sat and happily ate the whole thing in a few bites before reaching towards another one.
“These are good!” She exclaimed with that large smile of hers. Katsuki’s heart was racing in his chest. “I didn’t know you were into baking?” There was pink frosting on her chin.
Katsuki pulled his eyes up from her chin to her eyes, sparkling like the glitter on her face. He shrugged his shoulders as he took another careful bite. “Thought I'd get into it. Maybe I’ll make more pastries.” Uraraka lit up as the words passed his lips, causing him to bite the inside of his cheek so he didn’t fucking grin so widely and stupidly that she would know . “How’s your internship going?”
Uraraka grinned. “Good! It’s nice working with Ryukyu. Still crazy that we get to be a part of these big operations once in a while, though, you know how much things have calmed down since the League has been brought down. How is your internship? Miruko seems fond of you.” When she finished her cupcake, Uraraka folded the wrapper in halves until it was nothing but a little square. Her fingernails were painted a deep purple, like the night sky.
Katsuki laughed as he wadded his own wrapper into a ball. “Miruko’s a crazy fucking bitch.”
Uraraka grinned back as she placed her chin on her hand, taking what he said exactly as he meant it- she’s the fucking coolest mentor . There was a few moments of silence, the two of them simply watching the other. Katsuki’s couldn’t breath as her eyes met him, sharp and wondering. She bit at her lips, looked down at her hands, her eyebrows scrunched together, and-
“Oh! I saw this and had to get it for you!” Uraraka laughed as she stood up from the table and towards her desk. Katsuki blinked in surprise. She saw something and had bought it for him? Was that normal? Katsuki tried to remember all the times his friends bought him something- a snack here and there, birthday presents, valentine chocolates, but never just because . Uraraka Ochako was going to be the death of him. Uraraka sat back down, hiding the gift in her hands. “It’s silly, um.”
Katsuki held out his hands, palms up, a small smile, small enough to be mistaken as a smirk by others, quirked up his lips. Uraraka grinned as she placed a small box in his hands. He stared at it for a second before opening the lid. Inside was a little pin that he instantly recognized. The little red panda- Retsuko- was screaming into a microphone. The grin on his lips happened without thought as he looked up at Uraraka.
“Hell yeah. I love Aggretsuko.” He laughed as he pulled out the pin and examined it closely before setting it back in the box. “Thanks, you’re the fucking best Uraraka.” He held out his fist which Uraraka quickly bumped her own against. “I should get going. Almost curfew, don’t want Eraserhead to fucking chew me out.” He stood up with a stretch of his arms and stuck his tongue out at Uraraka for no reason other than to be a bit of an asshole. Uraraka stuck her tongue out right back at him, giggling slightly and her cheeks bright pink as always. Katsuki wanted to melt.
The little Aggretsuko pin looked a bit comical on his shirt collar, and weighed it down slightly, but Katsuki just unbuttoned the top two buttons of his shirt, scowled at his reflection, and got about his day as usual. If his heart beat a little faster than normal when Uraraka beamed at him as he slumped into his chair in the classroom, well, that was quickly becoming usual for him anyways.
His feet stopped in front of a shop window. He could vaguely see his reflection- the way his eyebrows pulled together as he thought, the dark pink scar that ran across his lips he had gotten from some shithead in his second year, the thick coat he wore to combat the cold weather. Katsuki could see himself, but he looked past his reflection at the little display.
Katsuki sighed and walked inside. After nearly half an hour of sitting cross legged with items in his lap as he scowled down at them, one of the employees had approached him. She had long black hair decorated with Hello Kitty hair pins that pushed her hair back from her face and long nails painted bright pink that set Katsuki on edge until her glanced at her eyes and realized she had a cat quirk.
“Can I help you with anything sir?” She smiled, her head tilted to the side while her eyes screamed she would kill him if he so much as dared mess up the display any further.
Katsuki scowled even deeper, but asked, “If you were a girl who gave a guy an Aggretsuko pin, would you want Retsuko or Haida?”
The girl pursed her lips, shrugged, and said, “Haida maybe. Or- both? If you’re into this girl give her a hint, say something along the lines of, ‘I feel like Haida everytime I see you’ or something.” Which didn’t feel like much help, but the girl only hissed at him when Katsuki scowled at her. Resigned, Katsuki bought both a Haida and Retsuko stuffed toy, ignoring how his phone buzzed with calls and texts from his parents who were still waiting for him at the house.
Shit.
When he got home, his mom gave him a stern talk, her hands on her hips as Katsuki’s father looked sheepishly on from the table, trying to distract them by the inevitable screaming match by offering Katsuki a bowl of extra spicy ramen. Tired, Katsuki had sighed, taken the bowl offered to him, and sent the bag down carefully by his feet at the kitchen table. After a moment, his mother eyed him and asked, “What’s in the bag?”
“Shit,” Katsuki snarled out as he shoved noodles into his mouth, glaring at his mother, who looked at the bag, with it’s cutesy brand name on the front.
She sighed and gave him a smile that absolutely did not make his face flush red, no it didn’t, it had to be the heater combined with how much spice his dad had put into the damn ramen. “I see, I see.” That was all she said before she sat at the table, that stupid smile still on her face.
This was getting stupid, so fucking stupid. He was Bakugou Katsuki, he could tell a girl- a pretty, beautiful, sweet girl who made his mouth feel dry whenever she looked at him a certain way, like she knew him which was fucking ridiculous, this all was fucking stupid- that he had a stupid fucking crush on her. He could. He could and he would, he was going to do it, he was. With two Aggretsuko plush toys in his hands, he knocked on Uraraka’s door.
The door opened and Uraraka stood there, her hair pinned up, little pink and blue drawn-on freckles doting over her nose and cheeks. She grinned at Katsuki and eyed the toys in his grasp. “Bakugou! What are you doing here?”
Katsuki held out the Haida doll, which Uraraka gingerly took into her hands, her pinkies up in the air as she held the stuffed toy. Stupidly, suddenly, his throat felt stuck. Uraraka looked at him with her wide eyes and Katsuki couldn’t speak, like some kind of idiot. He swallowed. “Uh, you’re really fucking cool, ya know?”
Uraraka blinked at him, the bright blue eyeshadow on her eyelids in view as she did so. Katsuki could barely breathe as he looked at her. “Um, thanks.”
Breathe in. Breathe in and just fucking say it.
“I- would- ugh.” Katsuki leaned forward and rested his forehead against the door frame, staring at the fuzzy slippers on her feet. “You’re so fucking cool and I can’t stop thinking about you.”
“Oh.” Her feet shifted slightly. “Oh, wow.”
Fuck this was a bad idea. This was horrible. He should have stuck to his gut instinct- his head- and not go along with his feelings like Kirishima suggested. This hurt , her silence that seemed to stretch on and on and on. Katsuki straightened up and rubbed at the back of his neck, “Ugh, sorry, just forget what I said, it was-”
A hand shot out and grasped his own. “Wait! No, um, I- I feel the same. I feel the same!” He glanced at her determined expression. His shoulders untensed and he let himself smile slightly as he met her eyes.
“Yeah?” He asked, his hands fiddling with the Retsuko plushie in his hands.
Uraraka grinned up at him, the colorful freckles on her face scrunching up. “Hell yeah.” Her hand shifted, fingers intertwining with his own, and she smiled and smiled and Katsuki couldn’t help but acknowledge how his ears burned and how he couldn’t help but smile right back at her. It was easy- smiling towards Uraraka. It made him feel warm and he couldn’t help himself as he reached up and poked at one of the many freckles on her cheek. “Hey!”
“What? I’m just appreciating your makeup Sweet Cheeks.” Katsuki grinned as he rubbed his thumb against the back of her hand, watching as Uraraka’s face slowly heated up and her mouth moved, making no sound. “Huh? Ain’t ya used to compliments? You’re literally the cutest girl in our year.”
“Shut up! When- when did you get good at flirting, huh?” Uraraka pushed at his shoulder. “Weren’t you just a mess, get back to that! Go!” Katsuki could only chuckle and continue to smile at her.
Funny, how one moment, she was a good friend he couldn’t keep his mind off of, and the next she was so much more. A friend. A girlfriend. A possibility. A star among the dreary winter sky who made him feel weightless; made him feel like he could fall at any moment. She smiled and held the Haida plushie close to herself and Katsuki smiled back and he wasn’t sure how all this would pan out- and fuck this was not part of his three year plan, falling in love or coming close to that feeling- but since when was anything certain in this world of theirs?