Archive of Our Own ^beta

The evening prior to Newt’s departure from New York was a bittersweet one for Tina Goldstein. The two of them had been through so much together in such a short period of time. Tina felt as if she knew him and didn’t all at once. The magizoologist had spent the past seven days with the Goldstein sisters, resting and recovering after the harrowing events that had initially brought them together. Once the group had settled into a comfortable routine, Newt spent the remainder of his time exploring New York, dining with Queenie and Tina, and talking with them by the fire at night. They had learned so much from each other about their respective wizarding communities, magical creatures, and their families.

After the first few days, it became routine for Queenie to retire to bed early. Each evening, she knowingly gave Tina a wink, stretched her arms out, and sighed dramatically. The younger Goldstein would announce her exhaustion and leave Tina and Newt to themselves. The silence was always awkward at first, but it inevitably dissolved into discussions that could last for hours. When the conversation lulled, Tina would offer to make hot cocoa for the two of them before they went to bed. They would sit in companionable silence, watching the flames flicker in the fireplace before Tina regrettably bade him goodnight and made her way to the small bedroom she shared with her sister.

Their last night together played out much differently than the ones before it had. According to Queenie, she had some last-minute “errands” to run and would be gone for the majority of the evening. Tina scoffed and rolled her eyes as her sister left for the night. Thankfully, Newt was tending to the creatures in his case and wasn’t there to witness the exchange. It was up to Tina to prepare dinner for her and Newt and to entertain him for the evening. Tina prepared a simple meal of beef biscuits and hot soup.

Newt popped his head out of the case right as Tina was ladling their soup into two bowls. He grinned shyly at her before stepping out and latching his case securely.

Tina offered a happy grin as she admired his freckled cheeks and the way his auburn fringe fell across his blue-grey eyes. “You’re just in time, dinner’s ready.”

“Smells wonderful Tina really, thank you for this,” he responded in appreciation.

“It’s no trouble. Shall we sit?”

Newt nodded as Tina sat at the head of the table and he took the seat to her right. How their seating arrangements had changed since their initial dinner at the Goldstein residence. Tina smiled to herself at the thought. However, her face fell when she realized that this would be her final dinner with Newt. She pushed back the tears that threatened to spill from the corners of her eyes and focused on the meal in front of her.

They ate in silence with the exception of the clanging of silverware against dishes and the occasional slurping of soup. Tina stifled a giggle whenever Newt made a loud sound while eating. He smiled to himself, but never looked directly at her.

After the meal, the pair cleaned up their dishes and moved to the couch for their nightly routine of conversation by the fire. Tina took it upon herself to make their cocoa early and handed Newt a steaming mug as he settled in his seat.

He looked up at her, surprised, but thankful. Her heart skipped a beat when his fingers brushed hers as he took the mug from her hands. Tina closed her eyes briefly at the contact but quickly regained control of her faculties.

“I figured you might want to turn in earlier tonight since you have to leave tomorrow,” she explained, sitting beside the magizoologist.

“Ah, thank you. I hadn’t thought of that.”

Silence fell upon the two friends as they sipped their drinks and enjoyed the light and warmth of the fire.

Sitting here with him in complete silence brought Tina to tears. She had so much to say and so little time to say it. As hard as she tried, the words wouldn’t come to her mind or her mouth, but the tears...the tears fell more easily than she would have liked.

Newt glanced at Tina and saw the tears that streamed down her face in the glow of the firelight. He whispered her name in a way that made her melt. “Tina…are you alright?”

Tina shook her head and smiled through the tears, quickly brushing them away with a wipe of her sleeve. No matter how much she pushed them back, they just kept coming. Out of the corner of her eye, she watched as Newt retrieved a handkerchief out of his waistcoat pocket and handed it to her. She thanked him and brought it to her face. It was embroidered with his initials and smelled of cedar, dirt, and saltwater. It smelled like him.

He smiled at her as she made eye contact with him. “Keep it,” he assured her. “I have others.”

“Thank you.”

“Newt I-”

“Tina-”

The pair smile as they acknowledge their interruption of each other. He urged Tina to continue.

“I’m going to miss this. These evenings...this time with...well…”

“Us?” the magizoologist boldly finished her sentence.

“Well...yes,” she responded, blushing.

For the first time that evening, he gazed at her with tears glistening in his eyes.

“I will too,” he affirmed, his hand hovering near her back to comfort her. He pulled it away before she could notice; before he made another connection he’d have to break; before he fell for her more than he already had.

The next day at the docks was worse for Tina than the night before. It became real...final.

She thanked him for speaking to the President on her behalf. Thanks to him, she now had a job to return to.

The tension in the air was palpable as a hushed silence fell between the companions. Despite all the people shuffling around them, trying to get to their destination, Tina could only see him. For a brief moment, she allowed herself to memorize the map of his face: the hair that fell in his eyes, the rare shade of blue that his eyes turned when he was sad, the smallest freckles that splayed across his nose, and the curve of his lips.

A thought crossed her mind and Tina was suddenly feeling brave and paralyzed at the same time. Queenie had told Tina of a friend of Newt’s, one Leta Lestrange. She hadn’t offered details, but the pair had been friends at school until Leta betrayed Newt for one reason or another. Regardless of whatever had passed between the two, Newt still carried a picture of Leta in his case. The next words that fell from her mouth surprised even Tina:

“Does Leta Lestrange like to read?”

Newt seemed puzzled at this before he registered the name that Tina had spoken. She was secretly relieved that Newt appeared to know very little of Leta and simultaneously pleased that he wanted to send her a copy of his book.

She promised him she would look out for it. “Fantastic beasts and where to find them,” she quipped. Oh, how her perception of magical beings had changed over the course of a week, thanks to this very special and kind man.

The ship’s horn continued to blare in the background and Newt reached gently towards Tina. He softly stroked a lock of her hair in a way that Tina would never forget. She let out an audible gasp when his hand dropped back to his side and the two shared a final meaningful glance before Newt turned to head toward the steamship.

Tina’s hand involuntarily rose to the spot where he’d touched her.

Before she had time to react, Newt was back before her, with an offer she couldn’t refuse.

“How would you feel if I gave you your copy in person?” he’d asked shyly.

She laughed and gave him the reaction he’d hoped for all along: a resounding yes. This meant the two would see each other again. When? They couldn’t say. But hopefully sooner, rather than later.

Newt headed towards the gangway and paused halfway up to the ship. He knew if he turned around again, he might never return to London. He had to keep going. If it was truly meant to be, he would see her again.

After he disappeared on board the ship, Tina left the docks to head for home, giving a happy little skip along the way.

Tina’s joyful skips and slight smile faded as she returned to her apartment. Her feet felt heavy and her eyes even more so. The realization of what she would face when she opened the door hit her all at once.

As she trudged up the stairs, Tina was once again called to by Mrs. Esposito. She swore the woman had eyes that could see through walls.

“Is that you Tina?” her voice called shrilly through the wooden door.

Tina’s eyes rolled slightly as she responded, “Yes, Mrs. Esposito!”

“Are you alone?!”

“Always alone, Mrs. Esposito,” she whispered to herself before continuing up the stairs.

After inserting the key into the lock and swinging the door open, Tina allowed it to hit the wall with a bang. She didn’t care.

She flung her coat into a chair angrily and flopped down on the couch, biting back tears as she did so. She reached into her pocket and pulled out the handkerchief. Tina turned over and held the cloth, trying not to give in to her emotions, but damn if it wasn’t difficult.

She hadn’t wanted to miss him. Tina had always prided herself on being an independent woman who would never rely on a man to make her feel whole. But Newt was a different kind of man. He was humble, kind, and caring; all qualities that she would miss having in her life.

As she thought of all the moments they’d shared over the previous week, she broke. She fell to pieces and cried herself to sleep, missing the man she’d come to know and care for.

In the days and weeks that followed Newt’s departure, Tina’s life resumed some semblance of the ‘normal’ it had been before he had arrived, all with the exception of work. Things at work were very, very different. Tina was praised by her coworkers, friends, and people she barely knew on the street. The New York Ghost had published an article about her on the front page and suddenly, she was recognizable wherever she went. It was becoming quite overwhelming for Tina as she rarely received a moment of rest.

Tina had never loved being the center of attention, but she was now being congratulated for the role she played in capturing Gellert Grindelwald. It was not unusual for her to be approached by strangers for autographs or pictures on the street.

The only time Tina found relief was when she was in her office. Most mornings, she closed and locked the door, and slid down to the floor for a brief respite before beginning her tasks for the day.

All the attention left Tina with less and less time to think about Newt. However, there were brief moments when she was surrounded by people and cars and the sounds of the city streets and she would see something that reminded her of him. Whether it was the department store where they’d found the Occamy hiding, the Squire’s sign where she had first called him by his given name, or the docks where they had said goodbye. She would stop and close her eyes and think of him in her mind. She wondered what he was doing, thinking, and feeling in that very moment. Was he ever thinking of her?

She certainly hoped so.

It was three months before Tina heard from Newt, but when she did, she was overjoyed. It was a chilly March day that held the promise of spring. After returning home from work that evening, Tina spotted an envelope addressed to her on the dining room table. Her heart skipped a beat when she saw the return address. London.

Tina grabbed the envelope and raced to her favorite spot in Central Park. The bench was seated right at the edge of the water and had a perfect view of the park where children played and adults mingled. Tina felt alive and happy here; it was her quiet place. She was far removed from the crowd so that she could enjoy Newt’s letter in peace.

She tore open the envelope and began to devour his words.

Dear Tina,

I apologize that it’s taken me so long to get in contact with you. I made it back to London safely and immediately placed all of my focus on completing my manuscript, as I told you I would. I have maintained a low profile since returning home. I spend most days in my flat in order to avoid unwanted interactions with Ministry officials, reporters, and the like. News of Grindelwald’s capture spread across the pond rather quickly, before I even returned. I saw news of your reinstatement and your award from the President. Congratulations Tina, what an honor and privilege it is to know such a talented Auror as yourself.

Things have been relatively quiet. My manuscript is expected to be released by the end of the summer, just in time for the children to return to Hogwarts school. The headmaster of the school has asked to review my manuscript so that he may decide if it will be worked into the curriculum. Following its release, I’ll be traveling in order to promote my book. It will likely be one of the least favorite things I’ve ever done, but my hope is that the tour will bring me back to America. To New York. To you, and Queenie, and Jacob.

Until this time, if you wish to remain in correspondence with me, you are welcome to write to the address listed on the envelope. I truly look forward to your response.

All the Best,

Newt Scamander

Tina clutched the letter to her chest tightly before re-reading it once more. Happy tears spilled onto her cheeks and cooled her face as air whipped around her. As painful as it was to be apart from him, an entire ocean apart, Tina took comfort in his words and in the fact that he wanted to remain in contact with her. Though the distance was difficult, Tina knew they would be reunited...someday, somehow.

As she walked home, she thought of all the different ways their reunion could go. Each of them made her happy and hopeful. Upon entering the apartment, she immediately searched for a quill and parchment and sat in front of the fireplace to put into words all the things she wanted to tell Newt while he’d been away. She sipped her cocoa and smiled to herself at the opening words:

Dear Newt…