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Yang: Sis? Can we talk?
Ruby: *looks away from her schoolwork on her bed*
Ruby: What's up, Yang?
Yang: You might want to come down here.
Ruby: *jumps down from her bed*
Yang: *breathes deep*
Yang: How do you feel about Vomit Boy?
Ruby: I mean, he is sweet and adorable and...
Yang: *puts her hand on Ruby's sternum*
Yang: No... I mean... how... do you really feel?..
Ruby: There's no way he's going to notice me... I mean, not with Weiss and Pyrrha and you and...
Yang: I was afraid you were going to say that...
Ruby: And what's wrong with me?.. Yang?.. Are those tears?
Yang: *wiping her face*
Yang: Nope. I don't know what gave you that idea.
Ruby: Yang? What... what's going on?..
Yang: It's not like I... you know... him too... and Snow Angel... and...
Ruby: *hugs Yang*
Ruby: What's going on here?
Yang: Nothing... just that we seem to have fallen in love with the same doofus... And you say me, but have you seen the way he drools over Weiss? I mean, come on, man, at least give us a chance.
Ruby: In the name of Taiyang Xiao Long, I say we give ourselves a chance.
Yang: Not that it worked out for dad... but... what the hell are you saying?
Ruby: Two sisters has to be better than one Snow Angel.
Yang: *pulls Ruby's head into her breasts*
Yang: What the hell are you saying, sis?
Ruby: *muffled speech*
Yang: *let's her go*
Yang: Okay, let's try this again.
Ruby: We seduce him together.
Yang: One, seducing him isn't our problem. I don't want a simple fling, I want him to... be with me... tell me... encourage me... Whatever I do, I don't want him to slip through my fingers...
Ruby: And two?
Yang: Sorry to say, sis, but seduction is not your strong suit.
Ruby: *pouts*
Yang: Pout all you want, it's not gonna help us here.
Ruby: What do we do, then?
Yang: We gotta hit him...
Yang: *with her right index and ring finger, pantomimes stabbing Ruby in the heart*
Yang: ...right here.
Ruby: Like cutting his head off with a scythe: one swift motion.
Yang: Okay, that's dark even for me, but I like the spirit. First thing we need to do is get him away from ice queen and miss untouchable.
Ruby: And then?
Yang: *makes an emphatic hand gesture*
Yang: Okay, I got nothin'. He likes them all sweet and doe-eyed. Not so much loud and sarcastic.
Ruby: Oh, come on, you're a babe.
Yang: Okay, yes, fair point, but which one does he flirt with?
Ruby: At least he doesn't just literally stare over your head.
Yang: Alright, so we're apparently terrible at this. Which might explain why we've made like zero progress. What we need to do is find a way to beat our Weisst enemy.
Ruby: Like what, walking around in lady stilts?
Yang: That might work, but it would take too much time to beat her at her own game. We need to fight Weiss with fire not ice.
Ruby: Tackle him?
Yang: You're a genius, Rubes.
Ruby: *does a curtsey*
Ruby: Why thank you.
* * *
Jaune: *shakes*
Nora: What was that?
Jaune: You know how people get a chill down their spine?
Ren: Yes?
Jaune: What's the opposite of that? Because I think that just happened to me.
* * *
Jaune: *climbs the stairs in the dorm room, when rose petals fly in front of him*
Ruby: You shall not pass!
Jaune: Oh, hi, Ruby. Why can't I pass?
Ruby: I hadn't really thought that far.
Jaune: . . .
Jaune: *gets tackled from behind*
Ruby: *turns into rose petals and flies over*
Ruby: *lays on top of Jaune and Yang*
Jaune: Okay, you girls want to tell me what's going on?
Yang: Not going to fight back, Vomit Boy?
Ruby: Yeah!
Jaune: Why would I want to hurt you?
Yang: Wait, you're worried about hurting us? I've literally beaten up an entire club.
Jaune: And had trouble fighting a single huntress.
Yang: So, you're not going to fight back?
Jaune: I still don't even know why I'm here.
Ruby: There was a reason we tackled him, remember?
Yang: Almost forgot. So, listen here, Vomit Boy.
Jaune: Listening.
Yang: We kind of... love you...
Ruby: Yeah!
Jaune: . . .
Jaune: Could you girls let me up?
Yang: What, no go?
Ruby: *let's go*
Yang: *let's go*
Jaune: *sits up and looks between the two girls*
Jaune: Are you girls serious?
*pregnant pause*
Yang: I... I mean... I mean we did?..
Ruby: *hides her head in her hood*
Jaune: *points at the ground* Kneel.
Ruby and Yang: *kneels in front of him*
Jaune: I asked you girls if you were serious. I know I'm usually just a goofy guy, but this is something I am completely serious about.
Yang: Good god, the balls on him.
Jaune: I deserve a straight answer. I promise to give you a straight answer in turn.
Ruby: *pulls back her hood*
Yang: I've never had a serious relationship before, but with you... I don't want... I don't want it to just be casual...
Jaune: *reaches out with his right hand*
Yang: *tentatively takes his hand*
Jaune: You want to be serious?
Yang: I don't even know...
Jaune: You're deflecting. Straight question. Straight answer.
Yang: *breathes in deep*
Yang: I love you!
Jaune: *pulls her in for a kiss*
Jaune: Let's her go.
Jaune: *looks at Ruby*
Jaune: And why is Ruby here?
Ruby: *hides her face in her hood*
Yang: Oh, no! *pulls back Ruby's hood*
Yang: If I had to be straight with him, so do you. This was your idea, afterall.
Ruby: *pushes Yang's hand away*
Ruby: Okay, okay, I'll do it. Jaune You make my heart throb in my chest.
Ruby: *grabs his hand and pulls it to her chest*
Jaune: Are you both confessing to me?
Ruby: Uh-huh.
Jaune: So, I have to pick between you two?
Yang: *hugs Ruby from behind*
Yang: Nope.
Jaune: Both of you?
Yang: That a problem?
Jaune: Just so we're clear... both of you?..
Yang: Or, hear me out, take me and get my little sister as a bonus.
Jaune: She's far more than a bonus.
Jaune: *leans forward and kisses Ruby*
Jaune: *pulls back and looks between the two of them*
Jaune: Why the hell would I say no? To either of you?
Yang: Well, for one, you are always drooling over Weiss.
Jaune: To be fair, she's beautiful, but so are you two.
Yang: We're what?
Ruby: I told you you were a babe.
Yang: And I told you you were adorable.
Jaune: Both of which are quite true.
Yang: I... don't know... I thought...
Jaune: No, you didn't. *pulls Yang in for a kiss*
Jaune: *let's her go and pulls Ruby in for a kiss*
Jaune: I won't have any arguments here. You are both beautiful.
Yang (nervously): Then why are you so caught up on Weiss?
Ruby: Yeah.
Jaune: Because I'm not going to just hit on every girl until it works out. She also did compliment me.
Ruby: *thinking back*
Ruby: That was a compliment?
Yang: Yeah, I don't think she meant it as a compliment.
Jaune: Still the nicest thing anyone has said to me.
Yang: What? No!
Ruby and Yang: *tackle Jaune*
Yang: You're our boyfriend now, and that means WE are the ones who love you, got that?
Jaune: *nods*
Yang: The more I stare at you, the more beautiful you become.
Jaune: Okay, now that was a compliment.
Ruby: You were the first one to not think I was weird. You know... after the exploding with Weiss and... I just never thought you would notice me.
Jaune: Of course I noticed you. You are my precious, shining ruby?
Yang: And what about me?
Jaune: Just as precious, but more of a dragon than a jewel.
Yang: Well, you called me Precious and Babe, so I'll take the compliment.
Jaune: Can I get up, now?
Ruby and Yang: *let go*
Jaune: *sits up*
Jaune: *holds his right hand to Yang and left to Ruby*
Ruby and Yang: *grabs his hands*
Jaune: *pulls them in for a hug*