Work Text:
John Sheridan gestured for Major Ryan to precede him into the turbo-lift, and they rode in silence to the main terminal. Ryan was leaving, re-joining his ship, preparing to take his crew into space on a rebellious mission that was all too likely to end in disgrace or defeat. Sheridan had cast his die with the rebels also, and was in as much or more danger. The space station he had led into this predicament was an immobile target, hanging stationary in space, able to defend herself, but not much more. To complicate matters, he was saddled with a quarter million lives in his care; most of them civilians, some of them important personages in alien governments. A small part of him had wondered if those latter were an insurance policy of sorts; if the government on Earth would hesitate before inflicting indiscriminate casualties that might lead to an interstellar incident. He’d been uncertain whether the current government devotion to ideology would outweigh its pragmatism. He’d just had a demonstration of how far they might be willing to go in pursuit of their goals. His own goals were to make a principled stand, encouraging the others already in rebellion against the government, but also to buy time; delaying confrontation with one enemy while preparing to face other, more deadly, ones.
Bidding a warm farewell to Ryan as he exited the lift, he silently hoped the courageous major would make it through this. His thoughts now turned to his own destination. One of those important personages was returning to his station, and he was on his way to greet her.
He’d thought about it for hours, while supervising all the mopping up operations, while getting his slight head wound treated, while assessing damage reports. He’d gotten updates on Garibaldi’s condition, and heard when Susan was found and brought aboard. What could he say to Delenn that could possiby convey what he was feeling? Gratitude was paramount in his conflicted emotions, but there were so many other feelings crowding his thoughts, that it all became a jumble. He’d never considered himself good with words in any event. He could make a halfway decent diplomatic speech, with preparation and practice. Before battle, the focus and intensity concentrated his feelings into short, but heartfelt, words of confidence and inspiration. This was another kettle of fish. The welter of emotions reminded him of the days before he’d worked himself up to propose to Anna; the same cold sweats and uncertainty, and the same fear that he wouldn’t be able to get across what she meant to him.
Still, he smiled sadly, Anna had understood, and had accepted. He’d gotten the feeling she’d hadn’t been surprised, in fact, that she had been waiting, somewhat impatiently, for some time. It was different with Delenn, of course. She was Minbari, and that confounded his problem in many ways. He felt he was coming to know her quite well, but then some gap in culture or tradition would rise up and seem insurmountable. Added to that was the delicate political consideration that the Minbari, or, he reflected, the Minbari faction that followed her lead, was his best protection against another attack from Earth. He walked on, lost in thought, missing the admiring looks of the humans and aliens who parted to allow him passage. As he entered the lift to his final destination, his thoughts turned to how she had gotten those ships here. He’d had the impression that she was no longer in high favor with her own government, and that Babylon 5 was not a popular project among the Minbari; its status as precarious as with his own people. What deals had she brokered, what had she promised, what had she given up; to obtain the fleet that had saved them? It never occurred to him to wonder if she had promised anything on his behalf. It wasn’t in her nature, which he’d already decided was honorable in the exteme. She’d proven herself over and over to him, and he’d do about anything for her.
The direction this took him stopped him short. How had she become so important to him? The trust had been earned, the respect freely given; but there was something more, something deeper, underlying his professional assessment. As the door to the lift opened, he saw Garibaldi, who distracted him from his current problem by showing him another; the long line of people waiting to embark for Earth and other colonies. The people in line gave him cold, suspicious, and angry looks, for the most part. He clenched his jaw; he’d better get used to disapproval, there would be a lot of it coming his way. Then, he looked up, and there she was, coming closer, smiling, directly at him. He was transported, momentarily, back in time, to the finest moment in his life; to the moment he’d turned and seen Anna walking towards him, down the aisle. Her smile had been radiant, her happiness evident in her eyes. He could see the same happiness in Delenn’s eyes, as she caught sight of him waiting for her.
“Hello, John.”
Her quiet voice echoed through his brain, as he tried to assimilate the revelation his heart had just awarded his brain.
“Delenn…” he breathed the word, almost afraid to say it louder for fear he would shout out what he’d just realized. He glanced around, then took her arm to pull her aside. What he had to say wasn’t for public consumption. Those people in line, for instance, wouldn’t like it at all.
“Listen…I’ve been trying to think of some way to tell you how much what you did means to me…and, well, ‘Thank you’ seems poor and inadequate. I don’t know how much this cost you, and I suspect I never will, but I want you to know that seeing your face at that moment was probably the single finest moment of my life.”
The pause was only a fraction of a second, but his heart almost stopped, waiting for her reply. He’d felt all this before, with Anna, waiting for the words that would change the direction of his life.
“It seems that this is the only home we have left. How can I abandon, as you say, my partner.”
He thought she answered carefully, aware they were being observed; and he could hear the uncertainty, as well as the affection, in her voice. She was offering him her hand…for a moment he blinked, then took it, shaking it and smiling broadly at her. He couldn’t leave it there; she had to see what he felt. They were more than Captain and Ambassador, more than friends, more than partners. Slowly, ready to pause at the first sign of discomfort or distress, he raised her hand to his lips, and kissed it, never taking his eyes from hers, willing her understanding.
The spell was broken by the approach of the others, and they were separated briefly as Susan directed them into the main shopping area of the Zocalo, which was crowded with humans and aliens, all looking towards them. As the first thundering clap echoed in the large room, he looked down to see that Delenn had taken his arm, and was standing by his side, an equal partner, ready to face whatever was coming. He smiled down at her, seeing that they had understood each other. Putting one arm around her, he drew her close, as they both received the acclamation of the people they served.
