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Alone in his cell, Elias laughed bitterly, harshly, in disbelief. He had made a rare honest-to-god mistake, and now the universe had given him his reward. Though it was not entirely unexpected that he had been ousted from the Institute, he was still trying to wrap his mind around that the plan had originated from Martin. Martin, of all people, who knew Elias had completely underestimated him and, cunningly, used it against him. The Beholding help him, but Elias admired that. While he had been mulling over where he had erred, something in the unfathomable universe clicked, two strands of the Web’s thread intertwined, and a connection formed. Elias felt a searing pain on his wrist, enough to startle him out of his reverie in time to see “Martin Blackwood” in a dark black, messy scrawl burn into his skin, just under the neat, older “Jonathan Sims”. This was too much for Elias’ usually well-maintained self-control, and so he laughed. The way he saw it, on top of everything else that had happened, this might as well happen too.
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For most of his life, Elias had been apathetic towards the concept of soulmates; they were too closely associated with the Web for his comfort. And even when he had been young, popular opinion towards soulmates had been sickeningly romantic: star-crossed lovers, mythically perfect couples, doe-eyed sweethearts, all of which he viewed with overwhelming cynicism. Without taking into consideration the utter ridiculousness elevating a name on a wrist to finding the “one”, he fervently disliked the loss of control if assigned a soulmate. But the patience of the Web was unrivaled, except with perhaps the End, and it had been quietly weaving a web or two just for him.
When Jon put in his application to the Institute and Elias interviewed him, the immediacy and strength of the kinship he felt with the man had been jarring, like the ground had disappeared beneath his feet. However, he adjusted to the feeling, as disconcerting as it was, and found it was not unwelcome, especially because he had been increasingly… displeased with his current Archivist. And from his estimation, Jon was just as born serve the Eye as he himself was; he was perfect. After 200 years of waiting, Jon’s name etched on his wrist became a reassuring sign that Jon was the one Elias had been waiting for, in every way possible. Elias felt an aching weight in his heart, the fathomless, dark need to possess what was his: his Archivist and the Crown that would fall neatly in his lap as a result.
But this thing with Martin was something else entirely, a living example of what he had always hated about soulmates, and he couldn’t even begin to figure out how he felt about it or how it affected his plans. But thanks to Martin, Elias had plenty of time in HMP Belmarsh to think and Watch.
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If Elias thought the Web had acted with spite towards him, it had ravaged Martin, who had grown up hearing a siren song of love and being wanted that he thought a soulmate would offer him. Instead, Martin had silently endured Jon’s constant dismissal of his tentative efforts to connect, and now a mutual bond with the one man he hated. Elias Watched from afar as Martin despaired at Jon’s bedside, clutching Jon’s lifeless hand. He Watched Martin sit in document storage, alone, eyes fixed nearly unblinkingly at his wrist, where Elias’ name had fit neatly under Jon’s, before throwing himself into his work to push it out of his mind. He watched Martin move around the other Archival assistants with only a quiet word here or there, continuing to record and file as if his whole life didn’t suddenly feel meaningless.
Then the attack on his Institute and Martin agreeing to work for Peter. Martin foolishly wanted his life to mean something, even if the meaning came from a pointless sacrifice to stop Peter’s Extinction. The more Elias Watched, the more their connection worked its way under Elias’ skin; he could taste Martin’s desperation, bitter on his tongue, and felt the wisplike echo of Loneliness already clinging to his skin. He knew Peter would think he had already won. But what Peter didn’t factor in, and Elias had counted on when he made the bet, was that Jon would wake up. Of course, this changed everything. Elias had his Archivist, more powerful than ever, and Martin had his anchor.
It was embarrassing for someone who’s life revolved around Knowing to realize how little he truly had understood Martin. But as Elias Watched him, Elias saw himself reflected back. Under his anxious exterior, Martin was tenacious, cunning, calculating, and, although he might not even want to admit it to himself, quietly burned with a desire to know. Martin had proved himself more than able to deftly manage both Peter and his Institute. Watching it all unfold with a such a different frame of mind, Elias could hardly fight the growing feelings of pride and affection. He could see a future where together, he and Martin, could protect and care for his Institute and Jon. However, with his acceptance of his and Martin’s bond came a slight hiccup in his current plan.
When Elias had originally constructed his plan involving Peter, he obviously had not considered the possibility that he might be bonded to whomever Peter picked to bring into the Lonely. Despite Elias’ newfound appreciation for and belief in Martin’s abilities, he didn’t quite want to leave anything to chance. Soulmate connections and the Lonely don’t generally mix; the Archive had several statements describing the excruciating pain and subsequent severance of a connection if one was lost to the Lonely forever.
And, in all honesty, he and Martin were long overdue for a chat.
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Elias and Martin sat at opposite sides of the cold metal table, in a guard-less room, flanked by two security cameras. Although physically closer than they had been in months, Elias could feel the wrongness of the wide gulf of distance that separated them. He longed to reach out, to touch, to claim. Martin wasn’t meeting his gaze, so Elias took the time to study Martin’s appearance. He was thinner then when Elias had last saw him, and rather wan, his freckles standing out in stark contrast to his pale skin. His reddish-brown hair had grown out some, making his previously slight curls more predominant. However, his expression, though currently not looking directly at Elias, was determined and, dare Elias say it, cold.
More than that though, Elias could smell brine and see fog wrapped lightly around Martin’s shoulders; the Lonely was tightening its hold on him, making it more difficult to experience their connection. But, although weakened, it remained. Elias brusquely pushed past the cold, the Lonely, to discover what Martin was feeling. Elias briefly felt a myriad of emotions: anxiety, resolve, irritation, and resentment. However, just as rapidly as they had washed over him, they disappeared behind a wall of fog. Martin’s eyes narrowed, but as he opened his mouth to speak, Elias silenced him with a hand, shaking his head.
“One second, Martin. I believe...” A tape recorder that had appeared on the table between them clicked on.
“There. Much better.” Elias folded his hands in front of himself.
“You know I don’t care if Jon hears this,” Martin said, crossing his arms.
Elias gave an exaggerated sigh. “Come on, Martin. Its been so long since I’ve seen you. Let’s not start with lies.”
Martin took a deep breath, finally looking Elias in the eye. “Fine.”
“I am very pleased to see you.”
Martin frowned, and raised an eyebrow in disbelief. “Mhm. I’m sure you are,” he said sarcastically. “I bet this is a dream come true for you.”
Elias raised his cuffed hands and gestured mockingly around at their surroundings. “What? Being at her majesty’s pleasure? Separated from my Institute? Or,” Elias paused for dramatic effect, “sharing a soulbond you?”
To his credit, Martin didn’t flinch. “All three I imagine.”
“I want to see it.”
“See what?” Martin asked, bemused.
“My mark.”
Martin sputtered. “W—why would you want to do that? In denial?”
“Clearly not. I just wish to see it for myself. My name on your skin.”
The tips of Martin’s ears turned red, his cheeks burned. Elias could practically feel Martin’s nervous heartbeat fluttering in his own chest. If he wanted to, he could try to project calm back, but he found he quite enjoyed Martin like this.
“You cannot honestly say you’re happy about this. That you wanted this,” Martin said bitterly.
Elias pursed his lips. “Well, I’ll admit I was not pleased at first, but,” Elias said, pausing as Martin made a noise of dark amusement, “But it has grown on me.”
“Sure-” Martin began, but Elias slipped in to interrupt before Martin’s self-loathing could get the better of him.
“I have had plenty of time to think about it, to reflect, and I came to the conclusion that I welcome it,” Elias said, his eyes never once leaving Martin’s face, his tone conveying seriousness in every syllable. He did not wish for Martin to mistake the meaning of this; he knew how Martin excelled at twisting words until they reflected negatively on himself.
Martin narrowed his eyes. “For what purpose?”
“Excuse me?”
“What do you get out of it?”
“You. Now may I please see my mark?”
With confusion and perhaps some curiosity Martin pushed up the sleeve of his jumper to his elbow, holding out his wrist, palm up. “Fine, here. Happy?” Expecting just a glance or a curious perusal, Martin gave a slight jump when Elias gently took ahold of his arm, his eyes intently focused on the two neat inscriptions on his wrist. His right thumb smoothed a circle over his name, and then Jon’s, a smile playing at his lips. Martin’s breathing changed, becoming shakier, and his previously faint blush blossomed beautifully.
After half a minute, Martin cleared his throat, clearly uncomfortable, and Elias graciously let go of his arm. Martin pushed the jumper sleeve back down, but Elias saw him fleetingly run his own hand over the marks.
Martin took a deep breath and, appearing to make up his mind, or perhaps going against his better judgment, he gestured for Elias’ arm. “An eye for an eye?” he said, causing Elias to smirk. “Shut up, its just an expression.”
Elias gladly gave Martin his arm, awkwardly trying to adjust the metal cuff so Martin could better see. Martin gave a slight intake of breath when he caught sight of Jon’s name. It quickly turned into a quiet, bitter laugh. “Of course, of fucking course,” he spat. “That explains a lot, doesn’t it?”
“Would it placate your own self-loathing and enmity towards me if I told you he most assuredly does not return the bond?”
Martin made an abortive attempt to push Elias’ arm away but he couldn’t quite seem to be able to do it. His eyes drifted down to his own name in its messy script, his own handwriting, which caught his breath slightly. It was as if Martin didn’t quite believe it until this second, in one stroke disproving that no one could ever have him as a soulmate. Those unfamiliar feelings he had been experiencing were not all in his head. He hesitantly brushed a finger across his name, as if expecting it to disappear or to prove to himself it wouldn’t. Elias closed his eyes to enjoy the sensation that was over too soon. Martin’s hands left his a few moments later, and Elias opened his eyes to see a Martin who was resolutely attempting to compose himself and failing miserably. Martin clenched his fists, fingernails digging into skin, and stood up, his chair pushed aside.
“This was a mistake. I just wanted information on...” Martin made a frustrated huff, pointedly avoiding Elias’ intent, smug gaze. “It—it doesn’t matter. I shouldn’t have come.”
As Martin made a motion to turn and leave, Elias stood quickly enough that his chair fell on its side with a clatter. Martin flinched, instinctively looking directly at Elias. Elias moved around the table, and then strode directly up to Martin. Martin, in turn, backed up just as quickly, until his heels and back hit a wall. Martin frantically glanced up at the two cameras in the room.
“Don’t worry, the cameras are off. They do that sometimes,” Elias said smoothly with a small shrug, his eyes gleaming. He stepped up into Martin’s space, willing the fog to dissipate under the shear force of his own god’s influence. The shear force of his own influence. You can’t feel alone if you are given a physical reminder that you’re not.
Martin appeared to waver for a moment on whether to attempt to shrink further back or push forward before inhaling quickly, and shoved Elias away with both hands on his shoulders. “What do you want?” he asked through gritted teeth.
Elias momentarily felt regret that Martin didn’t share Jon and his Beholding abilities. He missed the feeling of Jon trying to compel an answer out of him. However, Elias could honestly say that Martin demanding answers was a good look for him. Elias smiled wider.
“I already told you, Martin. You. You’re my soulmate, and I take care of what’s mine.”
“Oh like how you took care of Jon? Like when you didn’t tell anyone he had been kidnapped? When you let us be attacked by worms? Or when you let Jon run off to get his hand burned? When he died?”
Elias sighed, shaking his head. “Martin, what Jon did were his choices, and he’s more capable then you give him credit for. You may have noticed he’s still alive. Either way though, you and I both know that we can’t tell him everything we are aware of, for his own safety.” Martin scoffed, but before he could argue back, Elias easily brushed aside Martin’s hands, pushing Martin back against the wall with his own body.
Elias had no illusions that Martin would suddenly join his side, but he still knew how to sow a little uncertainty, especially considering Martin’s past (and if Elias had a guess, lingering) romanticism of soulmates.
This close to Martin, Elias had to look up at him. Martin was breathing rather quickly, his brow furrowed, still looking utterly bewildered, but Elias could see that he was trying to work out what was going on. Elias placed his hands lightly, gently, on Martin’s upper arms, before sliding them up, one hand around Martin’s neck, where he could feel his pulse, and another to his face, so that his palm rested on Martin’s cheek. Martin’s skin was smooth, soft. His pulse’s staccato beat was comforting to Elias; a slow pulse meant apathy. Martin jumped a little at his touch, as if given a small shock.
Martin’s eyes suddenly widened, clearly realizing something. “Oh. You’re worried, aren’t you? I’ve read the statements, heard Jon’s recordings. I know as well as you do that the Lonely breaks soulmate bonds. And for some bizarre reason you want to keep this—this connection that we share?” Martin shook his head, swallowing. “Or—or perhaps this is a just further manipulation to get me to push further away from you to join the Lonely because you really do hate our bond as much as me.”
Elias sighed, ever so slightly rolling his eyes. “Surely, with our proximity--”
“Is that what you’re calling this?” Martin cut in, and grabbed Elias’ hands so that they were no longer touching his face or neck.
Elias closed his hands around Martin’s instead so he couldn’t, at least easily, pull away. “Do you trust me?”
Martin gave a shaky huff, nearly a laugh, but laced with bitterness. “Absolutely not.”
“A pity. Very well then. You were just able to grasp a small thread of my emotions. I want you to follow that thread and tell me how I actually feel about our soulbond. Do this, and you can ask all your other questions.”
Elias could the feel Martin’s jittery indecision like static on his skin and his need for reassurance of his current path with Peter eating away at him. After his little slip-up, Elias just hoped he had pushed his own anxieties far enough out of his mind that Martin wouldn’t pick up on them anymore.
“Fine. But I want you to step away from me. And I want for us to have this discussion back at the table. Not like… this.”
Elias sighed. It was honestly rather disappointing. “As you wish.” He let go of Martin’s hands, pointedly stepped away from him, and gestured back to the table.
Once they were both sitting back down, Martin just shifted uncomfortably in his seat, staring at his hands.
“Well?” Elias prompted.
“I… I’m not sure how, really. With...” Martin flinched, just ever so slightly. “With Jon, it was as natural as breathing.”
“And it probably helped that you didn’t have to worry about him returning that connection.” Martin’s eyes flashed, now affixed on him with an angry glare. Before Martin could interrupt though, Elias continued. “It was the same for me. When you actually have to deal with a relationship, it complicates things. When you have to open up to others, it gets messy. Not everyone likes being seen. But now, we both have an opportunity to see and be seen. I don’t think I appreciated what I was missing enough before with Jon.”
Martin didn’t say anything, but muttered under his breath something that sounded like “I bet you didn’t, you spooky motherfucker.”
Ignoring him, Elias continued, “All of that to say, I do have an idea of something that may help you.”
“What is it?” Martin asked, eyeing him skeptically.
Elias offered his hands. “Here. Direct contact is frankly the most efficient way to strengthen the connection. That’s what I was trying to say earlier.”
Martin buried his face in his hands, his fingers tangling into his hair. With a groan of disgust, or perhaps exasperation, Martin clenched his fists, tugging on his hair, before looking up, his hands raised in surrender. “Fine. Fine, fine, fine.” With a deep breath, Martin leaned forward, hands firmly grasping Elias’. Elias relished the sensation of the warm, soft hands that enclosed around his.
“Now what?” Martin demanded.
Elias shrugged. “Its up to you now. I can only do so much, Martin.” Giving Martin a critical look, Elias continued, “Although thinking about me may help.”
“Thinking about you… Yeah, I’ll think about you,” Martin muttered under his breath, glancing down at their joined hands where Elias had begun to brush his thumb over Martin’s knuckles. “I’ll—I’ll,” Martin stumbled, his voice slightly shaking, before barreling on, “I’ll think about how irritating and awful you are, how you won’t tell us fucking anything, how you force us to-- oh.” Martin’s eyes abruptly, briefly widened, before he exhaled. “Oh.”
The connection between them flared, finally; it burned through Elias stronger than ever, and he smiled, basking in its warmth as a cat would in a patch of sun. He drew in Martin’s feelings of anger, bemusement, tentative interest, and grudging admiration as easily as breathing. He knew without a doubt Martin could sense his pleasure.
“You… y—you do like this. This—having me as a soulmate?” Martin said, dazed. “This—this—our bond. Its—“ Martin shook his head in bewilderment, as if still trying to deny it. “You—you… But—you hated me. I know that. You forced me to see—to feel my mum’s--” Martin’s brow furrowed, his lower lip quivering. When he continued, his voice was markedly shakier. “Why would this bond change anything for you? You’re no romantic, I don’t feel any romantic--” Martin stopped, closing his eyes, and was breathing heavily by this point.
“Martin,” Elias said in a low, quiet voice, his thumbs still dragging across Martin’s skin in small, slow circles. “Its okay. You’re okay.” He gave a small sigh, and pursed his lips. “In my defense, you were acting out. But--”
Martin laughed, a high pitched, nearly hysterical sound. “Acting out? You’re still...” he managed, his voice still high, wavering. Martin’s hands now gripped Elias’ as if trying to hurt him and as if clinging to a lifeline all at once. “You’re defending that even after we’ve become soulmates? You’re a bastard, you know that, right? A psychopathic bastard, and—and my soulmate.” Martin gave another broken laugh.
“So what does that say about you?”
Martin’s red rimmed eyes narrowed as he glowered at Elias. “Oh fuck off.”
As usual with Martin, this conversation seemed to be getting away from him. “Damn it. Martin.”
“What?” Martin gritted out.
“I had underestimated you… I… Hm. This won’t do.” Instead of trying to convey his thoughts with words, Elias pushed his feelings of admiration, the gratification he got from seeing Martin, and his possessiveness to the forefront of his mind for Martin’s perusal. With abstract interest, Elias thought he could actually sense Martin’s consciousness in his mind turning over these feelings.
Martin blinked, and his hands, still holding Elias’, relaxed imperceptibly. His expression also softened, though not to how he usually looked at Jon. He looked at Elias like an abstract painting, trying discern the meaning behind the forms and colors and shapes, attempting to work out how he felt about it.
“And that,” Martin said, gesturing towards Elias’ head, “makes everything you’ve put me, and everyone I care about, through good and fine?”
“I cannot presume to tell you how to feel. But you need to know that my feelings have changed. We are soulmates, and that is no insignificant thing.”
“Fine,” Martin said shortly, a ghost of a waver still in his voice. “I accept it. I still strongly dislike this whole situation, to put it mildly, but I’ll accept you… like having me as a soulmate.”
“Thank you, Martin.” Elias said, with an approximation of gentleness, and pulled his hands away from Martin’s. “Well, on to business.”
With some distaste, he told Martin that what Peter had been telling him was (unfortunately) true. He described his original disbelief in the Extinction, and how he now had to admit it was real. It was rather unfortunate that as a condition of Peter and his bet he wasn’t allowed to lie, at least about anything on Peter’s side of things.
“As for why I’ve done so little about such a looming existential threat, to be blunt, I’ve been rather busy.”
Martin laughed humorlessly, rolling his eyes.
“Don’t forget, I’m here,” Elias said sanctimoniously, and gestured at the room again, “due in no small part to your actions. So by this point all I can do is confirm that everything Peter told you is true.”
Martin’s eyes flashed back to his suddenly, catching Elias by surprise. “I think he wants me to join the Lonely,” Martin said quietly, his head slightly cocked, his gaze inscrutable, but somehow still managing to look vulnerable. Without warning, Elias felt… choked with a nameless emotion, curling inside his chest, like smoke. Peter couldn’t have Martin, Martin was his, Peter didn’t deserve Martin.
He folded his hands together, hoping Martin wouldn’t notice their slight shaking. “Then it sounds like you have a decision to make,” he said tightly, with a cold smile. Damn this bet. He forced his tone and his expression to be as cool and detached as possible to hide his disgust at the thought of Peter’s hands on Martin, the Forsaken hollowing him out until there was nothing left, unmaking the bond they shared. He resented having doubts about this bet with Peter though, especially with so much on the line; his long held plans were so close to coming to fruition, but he had not planned for this absurd set of circumstances. He never imagined he would have a... personal interest. Internally, Elias pulled a face. Not for the last time, he silently cursed the Web.
“That’s all?” Martin asked, eyebrows raised. “Great. Great, great. So what you’re actually saying is that you’ll be-- no help whatsoever?”
Elias gave him a bitter smile. “Just like old times.”
“I don’t know what I expected.” Martin rubbed his temples and sighed. “Right, we’re done here.” Martin stood, and this time Elias didn’t try to physically stop Martin as he turned to unlock and open the door.
“One last thing Martin, something I don’t believe Jon’s shared with you.”
At the mention of Jon’s name, Martin visibly tensed. “What?”
“Your soulbond with Jon is mutual. Its a rather recent development, since his... accident with the Stranger. I don’t blame you for not noticing of course. With how you’re running headfirst into the Lonely and all. The Lonely does tend to obscure things.”
“You’re lying.” Martin’s face was stony, but Elias knew it was a facade.
“Martin, I would never, not to you. What could I possibly gain from lying about this? It benefits only you.”
Martin snorted. “Right. Well, like I said, we’re done here.”
“Don’t forget to keep in touch, Martin,” Elias called out, shackled hands raised. “There are so many people in here, but without one’s friends… It does get rather lonely.”
Without so much as a glance back, Martin shut the heavy door behind him with a resounding clang.
Martin was beautifully enigmatic, swinging wildly between wearing his heart on his sleeve and being nearly impossible to read. So he had no way of knowing for sure if he had done enough to sway Martin away from Peter, but he done all he could. There was nothing Elias could do now but wait and Watch how it all played out.
