Work Text:
Tony walked down the hall toward the communal kitchen when the sound of Natasha's voice stopped him. Normally hearing that someone was in the room wouldn't have made him pause but there was something about her tone, not to mention the nickname she was using. The very one she routinely smacked him upside the head for saying.
“Tell me you aren't planning on keeping that picture of Darcy sucking on a Capsicle.," Nat was saying sounding amused and annoyed at the same time.
“It's not like she didn't see me standing there. It was pretty hot, she was really going to town on that thing. Never thought I’d envy a Capsicle before, but damn.” Clint was saying with a soft whistle of appreciation. Tony's mind was whirling with this new and surprising information. Darcy and Steve? When the fuck did that happen? How could he be so out of the loop that he was blindsided by this news? Seriously, Darcy going down on Cap and letting Clint take pictures? What the hell? He knew she had a wild side but damn.
“I’d worry more about Steve hearing you talk like that. He’s going to be annoyed when it gets around as it is. Usually you aren’t so easily impressed by a woman’s skills, I can’t believe you’re getting all worked up over watching a little tongue action.” Natasha chastised.
Tony shook himself, this was getting ridiculous. He was eavesdropping in his own fucking tower. Squaring his shoulders he walked into the kitchen, where he was completely ignored by his friends.
“Hey it was damn impressive, she got that whole thing in her mouth without batting an eyelash. When I tried it I got a headache.” Clint was saying now. Tony gaped at him in shock. Clint had gone down on Steve too? Wasn’t he all coupled with Natasha? What the actual fuck was happening in his tower?
“That’s because you go too fast, you have to take it slow not just cram it in there.” Natasha criticized. Tony froze again, he had no idea what to do with Natasha giving her boyfriend blow job tips.
“But it tastes so good, it’s hard not to rush.” Clint whined either not noticing or not caring about Tony’s distress.
“I agree the Capsicle tastes wonderful, however that is even more reason to slow down and savor. You didn’t see Darcy greedily shoving it in her mouth did you? No she took her time, licking for a while before going for the whole thing. That is why she gets more out of it than you do.” Natasha lectured good naturedly. Tony was blatantly staring at them now, Nat had “tasted” too? Was everyone going down on Steve Rogers? Was this some sort of ‘accepting you as our leader thing’, cause he really wasn’t okay with that.
“You’ve never complained about how I use my mouth before.” Clint teased wagging his eyebrows at her.
“Oh please, I complain about your mouth all the time it’s just usually about what comes out not what you’re putting in it.” Natasha shot back with a chuckle.
“To be fair you’re more complaining about how I put a Capsicle in my mouth, not that I did it in the first place.” Clint corrected grinning.
“Yes and all this talk has made me want another taste, feel like sharing this time?” Nat asked flashing Clint a grin.
“Absolutely, you can show me how it’s done.” Clint agreed smirking as she turned away and headed toward the fridge. Natasha nodded at Tony, clearly not caring that he heard them talking as she crossed to the fridge and pulled open the freezer. After a moment she pulled out a small, narrow white plastic packet and moved back to Clint ripping it open as she walked. Tony watched confused as she pulled out a red, white and blue popsicle.
“I still can’t believe you took a picture of Darcy eating one of these.” Nat said with a grin.
“Wait, what the fuck is that?” Tony asked jerking into motion and pointing at the frozen treat in confusion.
“It’s a popsicle Tony,” Nat answered looking at him as if he were mad. Not that he blamed her, he felt like he was going mad.
“No, not just a popsicle. It’s a red, white and blue popsicle; it’s a Capsicle!” Clint corrected cackling.
“Wait, that’s what you were talking about? You and Darcy eating popsicles?” Tony asked in annoyed shock.
“Yeah, why what did you think we were talking about?” Clint shot back grinning. Tony stared at him incredulously for another long moment before throwing his hands up in the air in surrender.
“You people disgust me,” he complained heading for the door, by now having completely forgotten why he’d gone to the kitchen in the first place.
“You're right Tony, I discussed you with everyone I know and we all find you disgusting.” Natasha teased slyly as he stomped out of the room like a toddler whose favorite toy had been taken away. Clint snorted in amusement as Nat began to eat the popsicle, both of them grinning at the dim sound of Tony swearing as he retreated.
“Well that was fun,” Clint observed watching her enjoy the frozen treat.
“Yes, it was. Now I’m going to take this to our quarters and have some more, join me?” she asked sweetly before curling her tongue around the popsicle in a manner that was anything but innocent. Tony was still muttering his way down the hall when Clint tugged a laughing Natasha past him into the elevator; bright red, white and blue popsicle still waving in her hand.
