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Saying Goodbye

Summary:

Deceit says goodbye to Virgil

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Virgil isn’t certain what wakes him until he steps out onto the balcony. The cool air washes over him, soothing the gnawing feeling that something isn’t right. Then he sees the familiar shape.

“What are you doing here?” He doesn’t turn to look. He knows who it is.

“I came to say goodbye.”

He turns then, sees the yellow eye. He thinks to himself that he will see that eye forever, every time he closes his own. It will always be there, watching.

“Not here to drag me back, then?”

“No.”

Virgil laughs, hollow and bitter. He doesn’t believe it.

Dee walks past him, to the open motel room door. Virgil bristles, turns so Dee isn’t out of sight.

“Don’t.” He says, low and threatening. Beyond Dee, Roman’s sleeping form shifts slightly beneath the motel sheets. Virgil’s heart pounds in his chest, but Dee doesn’t move to go inside.

“It’s him, isn’t it?” Dee asks quietly, that yellow eye fixed on Roman. “He’s the real reason.”

“Leave him out of this.”

Dee turns to Virgil, and the threat Virgil imagined isn’t there. He looks almost sad.

“I didn’t come here to bring you more pain, Virgil. I came to tell you that you’re free.” Dee looks down. ”And to say that I’m sorry.”

He glances back toward the motel room. “Does he make you happy?”

Virgil pulls in on himself, arms folding over his chest. He doesn’t want to talk about Roman. He doesn’t want Dee to taint the only good thing that’s ever happened to him.

“I hope he does. That’s all I want for you, Virgil.”

Dee steps back to the edge of the balcony to look down at the dark parking lot below, and Virgil feels like he can breathe again. He moves between Dee and the door, quietly pulls it shut.

“I regret the role that I have played in your unhappiness. It may be too late for such sentiments, but I never intended for things to turn out this way.”

“If you want me to be happy, leave me alone.” The words are close to a growl, but they carry more fear than threat. Virgil would fight to his last breath for his freedom, and for Roman, but he doesn’t think he could really win against Dee in the end. It took everything Virgil had to break free, and he’s barely survived the fallout. He feels the weight of it on his back like a hand pressing him into the Earth. He doesn’t think he’ll ever be rid of it. He wants Dee to pay for that. Someone should pay. It isn’t fair.

“I intend to.” Dee turns to him, fixes that yellow eye on Virgil. “This is the last time you will hear from me.”

Virgil scoffs. “Forgive me if I don’t believe that the man who has hunted me across the whole fucking planet has suddenly had a change of heart.”

Dee sighs, looks up at the empty black sky. “I am sorry it has taken so many mistakes for me to accept your choice. I told myself this was business, that it was my duty to ensure you could do no more damage to the organization. I think I needed to believe that.”

Dee rubs at the railing where a section of paint is chipping off. A small cascade of white flakes falls into the darkness.

“I will miss you, Virgil.” Dee’s words are soft. He doesn’t look up.

Virgil doesn’t answer, just watches the paint flakes fall out of sight.

“I saw your potential the moment we met.”

Virgil clenches his jaw. He doesn’t want to hear what Dee has to say about him.

“You burn so brightly, Virgil. I thought I could focus that light, burn a path for the both of us. Instead, I nearly snuffed it out.” His voice chokes a little.

He swallows, turns, meets Virgil’s eyes. “Your light was never mine. I am sorry that it has taken me so long to understand.”

The air is heavy with something Virgil can’t quite name. He wants to scream at Dee to leave, but he doesn’t. His chest aches, and he can’t tell if its fear or something else. There was a time when he considered Dee a friend. He almost sees that man now, in the dark of the motel balcony.

“You don’t have to worry about me or the organization anymore. I’ll make sure they leave you alone.”

“I don’t believe you.”

“You don’t have to. I just wish…” Dee falters, and for a moment silence hangs between them. “I wish I could see what you will become, with no one left to hold you back.”

Dee looks away again, turns until Virgil can no longer see that yellow eye. “Goodbye, Virgil.”

And then he’s gone.

Virgil remains on the balcony, watching cars on the distant highway until the cold seeps into his bones and he’s forced to go back inside. He wants to return to the bed, pull Roman close and pretend everything is all right. He drags a chair over to the door instead, and stays there until cold rays of light break through the cheap blinds and he hears Roman stirring.

“Virg?” Comes a quiet murmur from the bed. Virgil turns to Roman. His hair is a mess and his eyes are soft. He blinks sleepily at Virgil from a cocoon of sheets. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing. I couldn’t sleep.”

He stands, makes the short journey to the bed and perches on the edge. Roman tugs on his sleeve. “Come back to bed. It’s too early to get up.”

“Okay.” Virgil runs his fingers through Roman’s hair, making it stand on end. He laughs softly as Roman bats his hand away and tries to smooth down the spikes.

“You’re a menace.”

Virgil doesn’t answer. He places a kiss on Roman’s forehead, and Roman pulls him down into the warmth of the bed, wraps his arms around him, kisses him softly. Virgil feels like he might cry. It isn’t until he feels Roman’s hand wipe the dampness from his cheeks that he realizes he already is.

“Hey, what’s going on?”

Virgil doesn’t have the words to answer. He takes Roman’s hands, presses a kiss to the soft knuckles. “I love you,” he whispers. It’s the only thing he’s certain of.

As Roman rests his forehead against Virgil’s, he wonders if Dee was telling the truth, and what that would mean. He can’t remember what it’s like to live without looking over his shoulder. He pulls Roman closer, buries his face in the warmth of his chest. If it’s true, if he’s free, then this is all he wants.