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Lucifer woke with a smile on his lips and anxiety in his heart.
It was an odd feeling. He was happy—that was without question—instead of being mostly anxious like the other morning. But there was still an underlying layer of worry that he was going to fuck this up.
No, not worry. Certainty. He was certainly going to fuck this up and he would have to rely on the good graces of the Detective to forgive him. But in his experience, there was a limit to how often you could expect forgiveness, and he had a habit of pushing past that limit without realizing he was doing it. He had a feeling that giving in to this anxiety would be pushing past that limit with the Detective.
And, for once, he didn't want to give in to the anxiety that this was going to blow up in his face. There was the urge to leave before it could, of course, but it wasn't overwhelming. It was the happiness that was almost overwhelming. The feeling that finally, he got to have something he dearly wanted.
When he checked the clock, he realized he was going to be late and rushed out of bed to get ready for the day.
When he got to the precinct, he paused to watch the Detective at her desk before she saw him. She checked her phone with a frown, and he realized with a funny blip to his heart that she was waiting for him.
"Detective!" he said as he got near her desk. She looked up in surprise and he smiled when their gazes met. "Miss me?"
He had stayed until late the night before, quietly talking about nothing in particular while the urchin slept. It had been nice—comfortable—and he was looking forward to repeating it as often as possible. Perhaps with some added activity when the urchin wasn't around.
When he'd finally had to leave, the Detective yawning and dozing in his arms, it was only with regret. They had kissed sweetly at the door, a soft thing he had felt down to his toes, and he'd had to sit in the car for a moment to get control of himself, remind himself it was only a goodbye kiss, nothing special. Certainly nothing worth that much of a reaction.
"I wasn't sure if you were coming in today," she said, and her tone had something careful in it that made him stop.
"Are you doing paperwork?" he asked, his distaste for the activity never having faded. If she was, he would stay for a bit, perhaps, but not all day.
"No, I just- Never mind," she said and finally smiled at him. "Sit down. You're giving me a crick in my neck."
He sat, puzzling over what she could have meant. It did nothing to help his mild anxiety, and that- oh, yes, alright, it was fair for her to be worried that he would have disappeared again.
"I'm done running," he said quietly, intently, and she looked to him in surprise.
"I-" she started, then shook her head. "I know. I shouldn't-"
His heart was in his throat, but when she didn't continue, he said, "You should. I- I have treated you very badly in the past. And I want to make up for it."
She smiled and looked around as if to check that no one was watching, and then got up and pecked him on the cheek. It was a brief touch, something that in other circumstances wouldn't have lit a fire in him, and yet because it was Chloe, he found himself trailing after her in a daze.
"Oh," she said as she was getting in the car. "We're driving around to look at Christmas lights tonight, if you want to come."
"Of course," he said, unsure what that actually entailed. He didn't ask, though. It didn't matter, as long as he got to be around the Detective for longer. To maybe be kissed by her again. If this was what addiction felt like, he suddenly understood addicts a lot more.
Work wasn't terrible interesting, the best part of it being the times when he was able to steal a touch or a kiss from the Detective in the car between interviews. No matter how much she scolded him about being professional, he could tell that she was enjoying the game too.
He followed her home at the end of the day, it not occurring to him to do anything else. He had her pressed up against the door before she could even get her key out, claiming her lips for his own. She laughed and her attempts to push him away where half-hearted at best.
"Lucifer," she said in between kisses. "We should go inside. What are the neighbors going to think?"
"That you have a devilishly handsome suitor, of course," he said, but something twisted in his stomach at her words. He ruthlessly pushed it away and grinned at her, diving in to peck her lips once more before straightening and stepping back to let her unlock the door.
Inside, he dodged the urchin and—as much as he wanted to be kissing the Detective—he moved straight into the kitchen to begin dinner.
"You don't have to do that," the Detective said, as if he didn't know that. As if he didn't like cooking for them, taking care of them. It was a strange instinct, this need to please, but not one he was unhappy with.
"Of course, darling," he said and pulled out chicken breasts he'd set to marinating the night before. "But I hardly mind."
"Alright," she said, leaning against the counter and watching him. "I just want to make sure you know you don't need to."
He cast her an amused look. "I know."
Dinner passed swiftly and the sun had been fully set for quite some time before the urchin asked if they could leave now pretty please.
The Detective took his hand as they left the house, slipping her fingers between his. He brought her hand up to kiss her knuckles, just to see if it would make her blush. It did. She knocked her shoulder against his arm with a grin and he couldn't help but smile back.
"Come on you guys," Beatrice yelled from inside the car, her voice muffled.
Chloe laughed and dropped his hand, much to his regret, moving to her side of the car. He slipped in the passenger side and, as soon as the car was in motion, claimed her hand again.
"So what's this business about looking at the lights?" he asked, and Beatrice was more than happy to explain.
"Some places do really cool decorations!" she said, her nose already plastered to the window. "No one near us does but Candy Cane Lane is awesome," she added reverently.
He glanced to Chloe for an explanation, and she said, "A few blocks in Woodland Hills get really decked out every year. So we go drive through. Usually Dan would be here, but…"
"Indeed," Lucifer murmured, trying not to feel stung at the reminder that this time together was coming to an end soon.
It wasn't like he and Chloe would never see each other after Daniel returned, but they would be seeing each other less and he found he was enjoying this introduction to Christmas they were giving him. Much more so than he thought he would.
But all good things had to come to an end, he supposed. He shook the thoughts out of his head and turned in his seat to talk to Beatrice.
"And what about this Candy Cane Lane is so impressive?"
The Detective laughed and Beatrice just goggled at him for a moment before answering. "It's got houses covered in lights and there's a snowman bigger than a house and a castle and music and it's really cool."
He hummed in acknowledgment and turned back to Chloe. "Is it one of those computerized light displays with the holiday music?"
"Yeah but times a thousand," she said, glancing to him with a quick smile. "You'll see."
And he did see. He had to admit, some of the light displays were pretty ingenious. But the truly beautiful thing of the night wasn't the displays when the Detective turned down the headlamps, or the lights flashing to the beat of carols being played over a speaker system, or the castle that Beatrice exclaimed over.
It was the way Chloe held his hand the entire time, the way they traded soft smiles, the way she leaned over the console to kiss him when the traffic slowed to a stop in front of them. It was being with her.
THE END