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Donghyuck arrives home from school after being temporarily excluded, again, but this time he thinks it could be his last.
He opens the door to find his parents stood in the doorway with his laptop and journal in their hands. They know.
His eyes widen and he opens his mouth to speak but before he can tell them it’s not what they think, his dad shuts the door behind him and kicks Donghyuck in the back of the leg, knocking him to the floor. His parents proceed to beat him black and blue, calling him every name under the sun.
“No son of ours would ever sin this way!” his mother spits.
“We didn’t raise a faggot!” his father adds.
The pain is bearable until his sister walks in, she is only 11 years old. She should never have to see her big brother like that. She runs to his side and cries, holding onto him for dear life as if he could slip away from her at any given moment.
Their mum pulls her away from Donghyuck, she starts to scream for her to let go.
“What have you done to him?! How could you?” she cries.
Donghyuck feels the burning tears roll down his cheeks.
His dad runs upstairs and grabs everything he can see, throwing it into a garbage bag before tying it up. He chucks it at Donghyuck and tells him to “Get the fuck out of this house! You’re no son of ours,” to which Donghyuck pushes past him to go and say goodbye to his sister.
“I’m sorry, Chae, I have to go now. I love you, please keep working hard at school, okay? Promise me you’ll do well for me?” Donghyuck asks, holding her hands in his own.
“I p-promise, I love you Hyuckie.” She squeezes his hands tight, her cheeks wet from her tears.
He kisses his sister’s forehead gently and leaves without a word to his parents.
He turns up on Mark’s doorstep, the only place he can think to go. He needs his brothers now more than he ever has before.
Renjun opens the door, seeing his friend standing there with blood-stained clothes and pain in his eyes.
“Mark! Come here!” He shouts upstairs.
“What’s up?” Mark asks as he runs down the stairs. His eyes meet Donghyuck’s. “Hyuck... what the fuck happened to you? Was it Hyunjin’s friends for breaking his nose? Because if it was, this is fucking insane.”
Donghyuck could only shake his head at the older boy. Mark’s eyes glance down to Donghyuck’s right hand and the black garbage bag he held in it.
Renjun reaches out and takes his bag, taking it upstairs, while Mark helps Donghyuck to get up the stairs.
“They found out, right?” Renjun guesses.
“Yeah... Chae saw, that’s what hurt me the most. Seeing her cry and having to say goodbye to her.” He starts to cry again at the thought of his sister all alone at home, confused and hurting.
The boys hold him close, the way they always did, and it makes Donghyuck feel at ease. He’s safe with them.
They clean him up and get him into some fresh clothes.
“Thanks, guys... I don’t know what I’d do without you.” He says gratefully, smiling weakly at his friends.
“Always, you’re family. You know that.” Mark puts his arm around Hyuck’s shoulder while Renjun grabs both of them into the biggest hug. Hyuck finds himself laughing like he isn't in agony anymore as if nothing had happened at all.
Mark rolls a spliff for them to share and they head out to meet the other four boys.
They figure that Donghyuck needs to take his mind off of everything that happened that day, and it's their job to make him feel on top of the world again. They understand him, even if nobody else does. They understand each other. Because they are a family.
Mark and Renjun grab their bikes, and Donghyuck jumps on the back of Mark’s as they head to meet the other four boys. Donghyuck doesn’t even care that it hurt his wounds every time they go over speed bumps, he just feels safe with his arms around Mark.
The three of them laugh and shout with glee as they go. It’s like the world has stopped just for them, there’s no conflict and no pain, just fun.
They arrive at the park to see Jeno and Jaemin sitting on the swings with a bag full of cans of beer on the floor, Jaemin taking a drag of the spliff the pair are sharing.
Jisung stands up from his spot on the floor and immediately rushes over to Donghyuck with worry in his eyes. “Hyuckie, come here!” He wraps his arms around the older yet smaller boy gently, trying to avoid causing him any more pain. “Nana, move! Let Hyuckie sit there.”
Donghyuck tries to say no and that he’s okay to stand but Jaemin insists, planting a gentle kiss on Donghyuck’s temple as he walks past him. This gesture from his friend makes him feel a little fuzzy inside, in a good way, but Donghyuck dismisses it.
Hoping he's not blushing; he takes his seat on the swing and grabs a can of beer from the bag.
“How did Chae take you leaving?” Chenle asks, cautiously as he passes the spliff over to Donghyuck.
“Not well, she cried a lot and I did too once I left,” He takes a drag before continuing. “I’m okay now, Mark and Renjun really helped me.”
Mark smiles widely and goes over to the younger boy. “It’s nothing, you’re our brother, remember? Family.” He says before stealing the spliff off Donghyuck and running back to his spot next to Jisung.
He receives a scowl from Donghyuck and the group just laughs at the pair of them.
This is exactly what he needed. Just some time with the boys.
“Shit!” Jaemin curses loudly, making everyone’s heads turn to him.
“What is it, Jaem?” Renjun asks, as Jaemin stands up and grabs his bike from where he propped it up against the slide.
“I gotta go, my mum needs me. I’ll see you guys tomorrow.” And with that, Jaemin rides away before anyone can stop him.
“Who’s got the paint? I have an idea.” Jeno says with a smirk.
“That would be me!” Chenle beams, pulling out 6 cans of spray paint, in all different colours.
The group go down to the local church, knowing nobody would be around at this time of night.
“This is where your parents go right, Hyuck?” Donghyuck nods in response.
“Well, we’re gonna show them that what they did to you wasn’t right,” Jeno says as he takes the red can and sprays a red arch on the wall of the church, Renjun follows with orange and Jisung with Yellow.
Donghyuck takes a deep breath before taking the green can and spraying the wall with eyes ablaze. He hates his parents for what they did to him and he knows they got their views from going to this church because their parents went there too. They want to impose those views on Donghyuck and Chaeyoung, but Donghyuck refuses to let Chaeyoung be raised to be ignorant and hateful.
By the time they are finished, a huge messy rainbow is sprayed onto the side of the church and Donghyuck smiles so wide it hurts a little bit.
“Feel better now?” Mark puts his arm around Donghyuck’s shoulder and smiles.
“Yeah, thanks guys, but I’m tired now so could we head back to yours?” He turns his head to look at the oldest boy.
The boys part ways after each of them hugs Donghyuck, and Jisung even gives him a light kiss on the cheek before leaving with Chenle.
The boys get home to Mark’s house and his parents are arguing, again. Renjun suggests going up into the treehouse and staying there for the night since the sounds of shouting are more muted from up there. The other boys agree as they grab blankets, pillows and snacks to set up a cosy den for them to stay the night in.
Donghyuck yawns as he slips his shirt off and puts Mark’s hoodie on, and before Mark can say a thing Donghyuck is cuddling into his side and soon falls asleep.
Donghyuck wakes up to shouting; Mark’s parents, again. The other two boys were still asleep so Donghyuck just scrolled through social media.
He gets a message request from an account he doesn’t follow. Curious, he opens the message. It reads: “Hyuck, it’s Chae. Meet me at our spot at 12. I need to see you.”
Donghyuck immediately sits up and replies with a simple: “I’ll be there.”
He checks the time and it’s already 11 am. He scrawls a note on Mark’s hand with a marker pen he found on Mark’s desk, letting him know where he is.
He showers and gets dressed faster than he ever had before in his life. This means everything to him. Chaeyoung is Donghyuck’s world, period. He would die for her.
He gets to their spot early, 11:53 to be exact, but it’s not long before Chae arrives. She’s dressed in her school uniform so she must have skipped or snuck out of school but Donghyuck couldn’t care less about that.
“Hyuckie! I missed you!” Chaeyoung beams, pulling her older brother into the biggest hug. Donghyuck laughs, his smile the brightest it could possibly be, hugging back tightly.
“How have you been?” He asks her, sitting down. Her face drops, a sad expression appearing on her face.
“Mum and Dad are getting worse. I don’t want to stay there anymore. I want to come and live with you!” She grabs his hands, her eyes filled with desperation.
Donghyuck shakes his head. “I wish you could, I do, but they’ll come looking for you.” He looks at her with sadness in his eyes. She bursts into tears.
"I'm sorry. But..." Donghyuck hesitates. "If you want to keep meeting, we can. I promise you that." She smiles at him and they sit in silence for a while.
Meanwhile, back at Mark’s house, the boys take the opportunity to plan Donghyuck’s birthday party.
“I think it should just be us, keep it small but make it fucking awesome!” Renjun suggests.
“I’m paying. For all of it. No point in me having money if I’m not gonna use it to give my friend the best birthday he’s ever had.” Chenle insists.
“Okay, okay! Well, I think that Hyuckie deserves a blanket fort at this party.” Jisung says with a sweet smile.
“Jisung, we all know that YOU want a blanket fort. So sure, blanket fort is a go.” Mark shakes his head with a smile.
Jaemin’s phone buzzes, he picks it up and sees a text from Donghyuck that reads “Please meet me, I need you. I’m by the river.”.
“I have to go. I’ll see you later yeah?” Jaemin jumps up and runs out of Mark’s house.
Jaemin arrives by the river and sees Donghyuck sitting there, tears filling his eyes.
He sits down on the grass next to his friend and takes his hand in his own.
Donghyuck tenses for a second before relaxing into Jaemin's touch.
"I feel stuck, Nana. Like I'm trapped, frozen in a block of ice or in a bubble of isolation. People I love are suffering and I can't help them." Jaemin brushes his thumb against Donghyuck's tear-stained cheek, before resting his hand against it.
"Is this something to do with Chae?"
"Not just her, you too. And Jisung. You're both going through shit right now and I feel useless."
"Lee Donghyuck! I don't wanna hear that okay? You're not, never have been, and never will be useless."
Jaemin pulls the slightly older boy closer to him, his arms protecting him like a shield from the world.
The day of Donghyuck's party has arrived and the boys are out getting last-minute presents for him.
They jump on the subway to Gangnam. Chenle notices a bruise near Jisung's eye and moves his bangs to get a better look.
"Holy shit, Sungie! What the fuck happened?!" Jeno's raised voice attracts concerned looks from the other passengers.
"It's nothing… it doesn't matter." his voice trails off and he tries to hide the bruise again with his bangs.
"Tell me, Jisung." Chenle demands, Jisung can see the seriousness in his eyes.
He gulps before telling them, avoiding Chenle's eyes. "They cornered me in the boys' bathroom. They told me I didn't belong in there. Then they did this." Jisung points to the bruise.
Chenle's eyes fill with rage. "Give me names, nobody treats you like that and gets away with it."
"No Lele! You'll just make it worse!" Jisung grabs his hands, squeezing them to reassure him it's okay.
"I still want to know who did this to you, Jisung."
They were almost at their stop. Mark took Jisung's hand.
"It's gonna be okay, Jisung, you can tell us later if you like?" Mark's sweet honey voice soothes Jisung and the younger boy smiles up at him.
They get off the subway and run towards the ticket gates. They jump over the barricade and sprint towards the exit, laughing and flipping off the security.
Jaemin picks up this hoodie, black with a small embroidered sunflower and a yellow drawstring, and smiles imagining Donghyuck wearing it.
"I'm gonna get him this." Jaemin shows the hoodie to the other boys.
"You removed the tag right?" Jeno whispers.
"Yeah, don't worry." Jaemin assures him, discreetly placing the hoodie in his bag.
They leave the store with smug smiles as the security alarm remains silent.
Once all of the boys have their presents for Donghyuck, they head back to Mark's.
Donghyuck is sitting with Chaeyoung, wearing the blue party hat she forced him to put on, and a cupcake in his hand.
Chaeyoung pulls the lighter she stole from her dad out of her pocket and Donghyuck snatches it from her.
"Give that here, I'll light the candle. If you burn yourself, you know mum and dad will figure out that you've been seeing me."
He lights the candle and Chaeyoung rolls her eyes. "Make a wish then!" She nudges him.
'I wish I'll be truly happy soon, and that Chaeyoung will be happy and safe too.' He thinks to himself before blowing the candle out.
He smiles at Chaeyoung and she takes the candle out of the cake, and goes to take a huge bite. He laughs and lets her.
He soon heads back to Mark's. As he walks through the door he's met with all his friends' beaming faces looking back at him.
"Surprise!" They all shout in unison.
Donghyuck laughs and goes to hug each of them.
"What the fuck is all this?" He says, a bit shocked.
"The best birthday party you've ever had. Come on, loser!" Chenle guides him into the kitchen where he sees every food he could possibly want from kimchi stew to pizza.
"Guys.. you've really gone all out! Thank you so much!"
"Alright, don't get soft on us!" Jeno jokes, earning him a punch on the arm from Donghyuck.
Jisung puts some music on and they all start jumping around having the time of their lives.
After a few beers, Mark and Donghyuck are yelling the lyrics to 24k Magic by Bruno Mars while the others watch on and laugh.
"Hey, why don't we play spin the bottle?" Jeno suggests.
"Sure, why not?" Mark says with a shrug.
The boys sit on Mark's living room floor in a circle and Chenle grabs one of the empty beer bottles from the table.
"Okay birthday boy, you go first." He says, nudging Donghyuck playfully.
Donghyuck spins the bottle and it lands on Jaemin, who smiles back at him.
"Come 'ere birthday boy!" Jaemin grabs Donghyuck's t-shirt and pulls him in for a kiss.
Donghyuck had never really looked at Jaemin as more than a friend before but he was losing himself under Jaemin's touch.
He pulls away and goes back to his place in the circle. Donghyuck smiles, pretending he isn't aware of the evident blush on his cheeks.
Next Jaemin spins the bottle and it lands on Jisung. He leans in and connects his lips with Jisung's.
Donghyuck feels a new kind of pain when he sees his two friends kiss. He doesn't understand why he feels this way.
They soon finish the game and Donghyuck goes into the kitchen. Jaemin follows behind him.
"Wow, Hyuckie, you never told me you were that good a kisser!" Jaemin teases.
Donghyuck sighs, picking up a bottle of vodka and pouring some into his cup followed by some cola.
"What can I say? I'm full of surprises, Jaem."
Jisung sits in the corner, a large bottle of vodka between his legs, watching the other boys have fun.
He twists the cap off of the bottle and takes a large sip. He winces at the taste but continues to drink.
Jisung stands up and walks towards the door, unnoticed by the other boys. Chenle looks up from his phone and sees Jisung stumbling out of the front door.
He runs to help the younger boy but Jisung pushes him away.
"I don't need your help, Chenle! I can take care of myself!" He tells as he trips and almost falls onto the concrete. Chenle catches him.
"Jisung, talk to me." He shoots the younger boy a sweet smile helps him sit down on the doorstep.
"I'm not like you, I'm not manly enough. I'm never gonna be." Jisung breaks down in Chenle's arms.
"Shut up! You're more manly than me that's for sure!" He lifts Jisung's head a little and wipes his tears away gently with his thumb.
Jisung leans in and kisses Chenle, who hesitates and pulls back a little. Jisung stands up hurriedly.
"Oh god, I'm so sorry. Fuck- I- I shouldn't have done th-" He gets cut off by Chenle who connects their lips in a sweet kiss, despite Jisung tasting of straight vodka.
Jisung giggles against Chenle's lips, both feeling completely euphoric. Chenle would give Jisung his last breath just to hear the sound of his cute laugh again.
Mark, Jeno and Renjun sit in the living room doing shots and laughing together.
"Jaem… that was my first kiss." Donghyuck reveals.
"Wait, really? I'm sorry, I hope it wasn't too bad."
"No no it was good. It was really good." He smiles weakly at Jaemin.
6 Months later…
Chaeyoung's 12th birthday rolls around and she waits at the spot for Donghyuck.
He arrives, with a big bag of presents from him and the boys.
They have a great afternoon together and it feels just like old times.
At the end of the day, Donghyuck walks Chaeyoung to the end of her street.
"You look after yourself, yeah? I'll see you soon." He gives her a kiss on the forehead and she wipes it in disgust. He laughs.
As he's walking home, Mark pulls up in his dad's car.
"Get in! We're going to have some real fun!" He shouts from the driver's seat.
He gets in the car and kisses Jaemin as they drive away.
Mark's terrible driving earns him angry responses from other drivers who beep their horns at him but Mark just laughs. They all do.
Renjun swigs some soju and Donghyuck takes a drag of Jaemin's joint. Donghyuck believes this is what it feels to be on top of the world.
He might not know where he's going or what his future holds but he knows one thing; that he's loving whatever this is and that life is now.