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A snowstorm raged, Finn was cold and tired, but that wasn’t the worst thing. Oh no, the worst thing was that he was stuck in a cave with Kylo Ren. There had been a chase, and then a fight, and then they were both left with broken weapons. And then the storm had arrived and a reluctant, silent truce was formed. The two men had retreated into the cave to wait for the weather to change.
Kylo stood at the edge of the cave, glaring at the snow as if he could get it to stop through pure will. Finn sighed and shifted uncomfortably on the damp floor of the cave, leaning against the wall and crossing his arms. Finn knew Kylo was prone to unpredictable fits of rage, so he was tense and hadn’t let his guard down. He studied him, wondering, not for the first time, if this was how he could have turned out - bitter, angry, filled with hate. No, he decided, although there were similarities in their lives, mainly the First Order, he couldn’t imagine ending up like Kylo, that kind of darkness was not in him. He knew that now, he understood that where Kylo had been poisoned by the First Order, he himself had resisted, had fought back. He had a strength in him that Kylo didn’t. Finn had seen the good in himself and had made the choice to trust in it.
Suddenly, interrupting Finn’s thoughts as if he could sense them, Kylo turned around to glare at Finn, “You.”
“Me?” Finn questioned. “What about me?”
“This is your fault.” Kylo hissed.
“My fault? I don’t control the weather.” Finn decided this summed up Kylo pretty well - everything was someone else’s fault, no matter how nonsensical it seemed.
“If I hadn’t been chasing you, if you hadn’t broken my lightsaber in that fight, then I never would have been trapped-”
Finn stood up, readying himself for another confrontation. “This isn’t my fault. If anything, it’s your fault for chasing me.”
Kylo took a step closer, “You’re a traitor. I had to-”
“What? Kill me? For doing what you’re too scared to do?” It was a throwaway comment, but as he said the words, they began to make a peculiar kind of sense. Could that be why Kylo was strangely fixated on hurting Finn? Could he see in Finn his wasted potential or the path he should have chosen?
Kylo said nothing, choosing instead to glower at Finn. For a few moments, neither said anything, and it seemed the delicate balance of this uncomfortable truce might collapse into a fistfight. Which, as far as Finn was concerned, would be fine. Sure, Kylo had the Force, but Finn was strong and smart, and he knew that without a working lightsaber they were on a more even playing field. But nothing happened, neither of them moved, and Finn had the distinct impression he’d won this round. Perhaps it was because Kylo wasn’t used to people standing up to him. Or perhaps Finn had touched a nerve.
“Yeah, thought so.” Finn shrugged. “I can’t help it you’re angry I got out and you didn’t.”
“You don’t know anything about me.” Kylo’s voice was low, his tone threatening. But if he was trying to intimidate Finn, it wasn’t working. Finn just stood his ground, never wavering. There were few things he was scared of now, and a fight with Kylo wasn’t one of them.
“No, I do.” Finn gave a short, sharp laugh. “I grew up around people like you, I learned from people like you, trained alongside them. And that’s why I left the First Order, so I didn’t end up like you.”
“You wish-” Kylo clenched his fists at his side. “You could never be like-…I am going to be the Supreme Leader. We’re nothing alike.”
“Yeah, yeah, and I was top of my class. I was on the fast track. I could have risen up the ranks. But you know what? I made a choice.” Finn turned to look out at the snow. “And that’s the difference between us. I’m not weak, not like you. I know who I am.”
And he did know. Encountering Kylo had just made the knowledge even more clear. There were parallels in their lives, but their actions had been so different every time. Where Kylo gave in to hate, Finn chose the light, where Kylo was weakened by darkness, Finn was strengthened by goodness.
The snow had started to stop, the storm was over, as if the simple act of Finn looking out had ended it. He turned to look at Kylo, who was bristling with rage, one more time before stepping outside. He felt thankful he hadn’t ended up like him.
“Y’know, seeing you just reminds me what a great decision I made when I left the First Order. And you’re right, I could never be like you.” He murmured calmly, the adrenaline of the fight was completely gone. At another moment, he might have taken the chance to end things for good, but in that particular moment, he just felt the need to tell Kylo exactly what he thought.
Kylo watched as Finn walked away with a confidence that he couldn’t understand. He was unable to move and he didn’t know why, all he did know was that he couldn’t get Finn’s words out of his head. Eventually, as Finn disappeared from sight, Kylo slid to the floor.