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Inoo's fingers dance across the piano keys as gracefully as he usually moves himself across the dance floor. His body sways slightly as he momentarily gets lost in the music, his face holding a look of concentration so different than his typical smirking smile.
Yamada watches from the other side of the room, entranced by the music and the person creating it. Most of their bandmates are more focused on cleaning up and changing now that their dance practice is over. But Yamada remains enthralled by Inoo.
It's a feeling that's been blooming inside his heart for several months now, like an overlooked tiny flower bud at first. But Inoo is like the sun and oxygen and soil providing nourishment until the feelings have snaked through his entire body like vines running through his veins instead of blood.
Without even meaning to, Yamada has fallen wholeheartedly in love with his bandmate, the quirky piano player always with a smile on his face and a joke on his lips.
Inoo's practice is interrupted by Daiki and Takaki, who hover around the piano. They pluck at black and white keys, dodge as Inoo playfully swings his music at them in retaliation. Yamada watches it all play out, listens as the trio of friends laugh together.
He wants so badly to tell Inoo how he feels. He wants to wrap him up in a hug, wants to ask him to play music together, wants to see him smile because of him.
But he's hesitant to say anything. There's that nagging fear of rejection, like an unsightly weed growing up in his garden of feelings.
"Take a picture, it'll last longer."
Chinen's cheeky voice interrupts his musing, and he can feel his cheeks flush at getting caught staring.
"Don't know what you're talking about," Yamada says, forcing himself to turn away and look at Chinen instead.
"Uh huh," Chinen replies, clearly unconvinced. "Sure. Just continue pining after Inoo-chan. That sounds fun."
Yamada glares at his old friend.
Chinen, who's been immune to Yamada's intimidation tactics for years, just grins and hands him a water bottle. "Here," he says. "You look thirsty."
"Thanks," Yamada begins, reaching out for the bottle.
"Thirsty for Inoo," Chinen adds quickly with a cackle.
Yamada snatches the bottle and smacks Chinen's shoulder with it. When he's done, he can't hide a pout from creeping across his face. While he was distracted, Inoo had left the practice room. The piano now sits empty.
"He'll never like me back," Yamada sighs. "I'm too short. I bet Inoo dreams about dating someone he doesn't have to look down at." His fingers curl tight enough to put a dent in his water bottle. "It's hopeless."
Chinen taps the side of his head like he's just climbed out of a swimming pool and needs to get water out of his ears. "I think I have something stuck in here," he says with another tap for good measure, "because it sounds like Yamada Ryosuke is giving up."
He gives Yamada an uncharacteristically serious look.
There's suddenly a different feeling settling in his chest. A burning that feels like shame and embarrassment, like flames eating away at the vines wrapping around his heart.
He hates that feeling. It feels all wrong, even before Chinen had pointed out. Usually there's nothing he doesn't try to tackle head on. When he's focused on something, he's an unstoppable freight train. If he can fly suspended above an audience of cheering fans, then he can tell Inoo how he feels too.
That burning feeling shifts to something akin to determination instead.
"Alright," he exclaims, smacking Chinen with the water bottle again. "I'll tell him how I feel. And I won't let my height stop me."
"That's the spirit," Chinen replies. He has the audacity to look smug as he sips his own water.
Yamada takes a deep breath, thinking about the bright smile often resting on Inoo's face. He's going to do whatever it takes to get that smile directed towards him.
He's going to get tall.
***
Yamada has been standing at the top of the staircase so long the janitor has tried to sweep around his feet instead of waiting for him to leave. Yamada ignores the prickly feeling against his shoes though in favor of focusing on his mission. Inoo could walk by any minute, so he has to be prepared.
It's a quiet evening in the Johnnys Jimusho office, and mostly everyone has gone home for the night. He taps his foot impatiently, though his mind starts to wander to Inoo. He thinks about the silly things Inoo said during their magazine interview earlier. He thinks about the way Inoo danced around the cameras between photoshoots, going from grinning and goofy to serious and sexy in a split second. He thinks about the way Inoo's lips quirked into a half-smile while he scrolled through his phone during lunch break.
He gets so caught up thinking about Inoo's lips, he almost misses as the person in question walks by.
"Inoo! Wait!" he calls out, waving one hand as if that might help.
His bandmate takes a few steps backwards until he's standing at the bottom of the staircase.
"Hi Yamada," he calls out, returning the wave.
He takes a step forward to start climbing the stairs, but Yamada thrusts both hands forward to get him to stop.
"I need to tell you something," Yamada says quickly, words spilling frantically from his mouth.
Nervous butterflies swarm in his stomach, like they're anxiously looking for the feelings flowers blooming in his heart. He wants to shoo them away but Inoo is staring up the stairs at him in confusion.
"I just wanted to tell you..." he trails off, suddenly unsure of how he should confess. What would be the best thing to say to encourage Inoo to date him? Why didn't he write this down earlier?
"Just wanted to say..." he mumbles, at a loss for words while Inoo looks up at him from the bottom of the staircase in mild confusion.
"Hi guys!" Yabu calls out as he dashes around the corner and zooms down the staircase with no regard for whatever's happening between his bandmates. "I can't find my keys," he yells as an explanation as he disappears down the hallway and out of sight without slowing down at all.
Inoo glances in the same direction Yabu had gone. "I think I saw his keys in the bathroom earlier," he mutters. He glances back up at Yamada, the unspoken question to follow Yabu plain on his face.
"Just go," Yamada replies, waving his hand again. "I'll tell you another time."
Inoo nods with a smile and leaves to chase down their forgetful friend.
Yamada continues to stand at the top of the staircase for a few minutes, ignoring how the butterflies in his stomach have settled down now.
He's got to come up with a Plan B.
***
After so many years of filming Itadaki High Jump, Yamada knows their studio inside and out. So he's absolutely positive he has the perfect spot to confess to Inoo. This time it's going to work out exactly right.
Despite his confidence that Inoo will accept his confession this way, the butterflies in Yamada's stomach still make him feel vaguely nauseous.
Or maybe that's just his fear of heights kicking in.
He's standing on a balcony inside the studio usually reserved for staff to access the stage lighting. But he's picked the most secluded portion of the area, where the lights often don't need any attention. So no one should interrupt him this time. Inoo will walk by, he'll confess looking tall and cool as hell up here, and then they'll be dating. Perfect.
Yamada makes the mistake of looking down and his stomach churns again. He forces the urge to vomit back down because that would be decidedly less romantic.
He sends Inoo a text to come over to his spot, and then he waits.
He'd prefer to be Romeo, but he kind of feels like Juliet waiting on the balcony like this. Shoot, maybe he should have brought some roses...
Inoo shows up while he's trying to remember the lines about roses, immediately distracting Yamada with his slightly confused smile.
"Hey, what's up?" Yamada calls out over the railing, making sure not to lean too far over and get dizzy.
"You are, apparently," Inoo grins. "Did you need something? Help getting down maybe?"
Yamada shakes his head. "No, I'm good up here." (A lie, but he barrels through it, like the Romeo that he is.) "I just wanted to tell you something."
Inoo waits expectantly.
"Something about... roses?" he says, again finding himself at a loss for words.
He's pretty sure even the butterflies in his stomach are mocking him at this point.
Before he can say anything else, however, Inoo's phone rings. He hastily shoves his hands in his pockets, looking for the source of the noise.
"Oh, it's my mom," Inoo says. "Do you mind...?"
Yamada waves his hand. "It's fine. We'll talk later."
Inoo nods with a smile, and walks away with his phone to his ear. Yamada watches him go, and then sighs dramatically.
"My life is a Shakespearean tragedy," he says.
"No, it's not," a different voice chimes in.
Yamada glances down to see Hikaru standing there, dressed in women's clothing (not usual for a day of filming their show) and a cute wig. And for some reason, he's eating a bag of popcorn like he's got a front row seat to an exciting movie.
"No, it's definitely a Shakespearean comedy," Hikaru grins.
***
"This is awkward," Yuto says.
"It'll be fine," Yamada answers, shifting a bit to get more comfortable.
"It still feels really awkward," Yuto continues.
"I'm not that heavy," Yamada snaps from his perch atop Yuto's shoulders.
Yuto sighs. "No, I mean, I kinda feel like the third wheel here if this is really how you want to confess your feelings to Inoo."
"That's why I brought the earmuffs," Yamada says, carefully pulling out a pair from his pocket and dangling it in front of Yuto's face.
Yamada can't see Yuto's face from this angle, but he's sure Yuto is frowning. "Listen, I'm running out of tall places to do this, and I don't have time to learn how to walk on stilts."
Yuto gives his foot a comforting pat. "I think Inoo-chan probably doesn't care that you're short, you know."
"You sound like Chinen," Yamada grumbles.
"Oh," Yuto suddenly exclaims, pointing to the end of the hallway. "There he is!" He lurches forward to catch Inoo's attention, and Yamada has to scramble to grab his hair to keep from falling off of Yuto.
Inoo laughs when he sees them, and the pleasant sound makes Yamada feel warm. He hopes his cheeks don't start blushing too much.
"Hi guys, what's going on here?" Inoo says, looking between the both of them.
"Oh don't mind me," Yuto says, chuckling awkwardly and putting the earmuffs on. "Just pretend I'm not here."
"That'll be... difficult..." Inoo scratches his forehead, but then shifts his focus up to Yamada.
"There's something I've been dying to tell you," Yamada begins, nervously tapping his fingers on the top of Yuto's head.
"I'm all ears, in contrast to Yuto currently," Inoo jokes, pointing to the earmuffs.
It's dumb jokes like that which have always made Yamada fall hard for Inoo.
He takes a deep breath, ready to just blurt everything out. "I just wanted to tell you that I really li-"
But he's cut off from finishing his sentence by a surprisingly loud sneeze, and suddenly Yamada's whole world tips forward. He flies off Yuto's shoulders and falls hard on top of Inoo.
He had wanted to hold Inoo close, wrap his arms around him, run his fingers through his hair. But this isn't exactly what he'd had in mind when he "fell" for his bandmate.
"Excuse me," Yuto says, rubbing his nose. "Sorry about that. Might be coming down with a cold."
Inoo looks up at Yamada with a slightly pained expression, probably from Yamada lying on his legs at a funny angle.
"Just... forget about it," Yamada sighs, scrambling to stand up.
"Another time?" Inoo asks.
"Yeah, another time," Yamada agrees.
He watches Inoo walk down the hallway, turning the corner and disappearing out of sight.
"So did it work?" Yuto asks, taking the earmuffs off.
"What do you think?" Yamada glares at him.
"Well, there's always next time," Yuto says.
Yamada nods.
But deep down, he's ready to give up. Even he can't seem to beat this, no matter how strong his determination.
***
Yamada avoids Inoo as much as possible for the next week. It's difficult with all the music shows they're scheduled to appear on, but he manages the best he can. Daiki and Takaki are good at distracting Inoo, though they both seem to be reluctant to help Yamada's avoidance plan.
He ignores the feelings that he'd let grow in his chest, letting the garden wilt and wither. He figures if he just neglects it long enough, he'll move on okay.
Yamada slips his coat on, ready to head home after a long recording session. The sky's already darkened, so he can imagine the temperature has dropped quite a bit.
"Going somewhere?" Inoo's voice startles him about the same time Inoo slings an arm around his shoulder. He looks up to see Inoo grinning at him, like the past week of Yamada avoiding him hadn't happened.
"I was just going home," Yamada answers.
"Let's take a walk first," Inoo says, removing his arm to gesture towards the door.
Yamada doesn't resist even though he has no idea what to say or do. But Inoo doesn't give him a chance anyway. He chatters on about their new music, the weather, an unfortunate cooking incident that almost caught his stove on fire yesterday. Inoo's stories calm his nerves, and he finds himself relaxing as they walk together. Even laughing now and then.
Finally Inoo stops at a park entrance and gestures for Yamada to look inside. He gasps when he turns to see a multitude of lights decorating the park. The whole area glows under the different colors.
"Beautiful," Yamada breathes.
"I like to come here around Christmas time and look at the illumination display," Inoo explains. His voice is quieter than usual, a little more shy. "The lights just make me feel content. Like a bunch of shiny colorful fireflies lighting the way forward."
Just like that, Yamada's feelings for Inoo swell into full bloom again, like it's suddenly springtime. Even after a week of neglecting his feelings, he still likes Inoo so much.
"Isn't there something you've been trying to tell me?" Inoo asks as they start walking through the park. The lights reflect off of Inoo's face, illuminating his soft smile in a rainbow of colors. "I don't think we'll get interrupted out here."
Yamada glances around for something to stand on, but they're not near any benches and the playground equipment is on the other side of the park. So he lifts himself up on his tiptoes in the hopes it'll be good enough.
"Stop that," Inoo giggles, placing his hands on Yamada's shoulders and gently pushing him back down. "Just talk to me normally."
Yamada rocks back on his heels, taking a moment to stabilize himself again. The butterflies in his chest feel like they're bursting at the seams because this is finally it. He's going to confess.
"Inoo" he begins, and then corrects himself. "Kei, I don't know how to say this to make it perfect and romantic and all that kind of stuff, but I've fallen in love with you. And I... just wanted you to know."
He wants to look down at his feet, but he forces himself to look at Inoo's eyes instead, waits for the rejection, waits for the excuses about his height.
But Inoo's face just lights up as brightly as the park. "I've been waiting so long to hear you finally say it," he laughs.
"You, you mean you're not rejecting me?" Yamada replies, feeling the urge to check if there's something in his ears. "You don't care that I'm shorter than you?"
"Nah," Inoo says, hooking his arm around Yamada's and leaning against his shoulder. "That doesn't matter. I think you're actually pretty cool, no matter how tall you are. And your persistence and determination to confess was super manly." His familiar grin creeps up on his face.
Yamada can't actually tell if Inoo's making a joke about his manliness or not there, but he doesn't mind it. Right now, his heart feels like it's soaring. He's finally got Inoo in his arms, and it feels like they fit together smoothly.
"Hey, let's get some hot chocolate and head back to my place to warm up," Yamada suggests, leading Inoo back through the array of lights. He already has a couple of date ideas for the weekend he's going to suggest.
"Sounds good to me," Inoo says. "I love cuddling."
Yamada laughs, suddenly having a good idea. He raises up on his tiptoes slightly and then gently pulls Inoo forward and down a bit to press a kiss to his lips. Inoo happily kisses him back.
Maybe his height doesn't matter at all.
Not when they can meet in the middle.