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Love wasn't just a feeling, it was a warm presence – a light shining brightly cutting through the darkness or so everybody said.
It had started out as a casual crush, or so Taehyung believed.
He hadn't meant to fall for this boy named Jungkook, not when the other was committed and madly in love with Jimin. It also didn't help that Jimin was his best friend and his on and off fling, before Jungkook came into the picture.
If Taehyung was being honest, he and Jimin had started being intimate because they didn't want to talk about their feelings. He believed if they kept it exclusively physical, the emotional feelings attached to it, would disappear or be hidden from them. Taehyung was afraid that if he talked about the L-word, if he acted on it, Jimin might freak out. He had gone through three relationships in the past before turning to Taehyung for help, and Taehyung himself had just move on from Bogum and their toxic arguments.
They both were healing in a way, and they both needed time it seemed. So that's what Taehyung did, at least he believed sex to be part of that healing process – more like a friends with benefits thing – no strings attached. But three months into their agreement, Jimin had tried to go further.
On more occasion then one, Jimin had tried to bring up the topic but Taehyung had refused to dive deeper into that department.
And so, they had one night stands, which turned into a routine for a couple months.
Every weekend, Taehyung could be found in Jimin's room in the dorm.
But then, the new transfer student, Jeon Jungkook, arrived and everything changed.
"Taehyung-" Jimin had woken him one Saturday night, not bothering to switch on the lights in the room, and had blurted out. "I think I'm in love with Jungkook."
"Huh?"
"Taehyung...I said, I'm in love with Jungkook."
Taehyung didn't know how to respond, so he nodded his head, slow and confused. But Jimin couldn't see him in the dark, so he licked his lips and said. "Okay."
"Okay?"
He didn't need to see Jimin's face to know he was surprised by Taehyung's response.
"Well...if you like him, you should tell him." Taehyung began, the bitterness of the words burning on his tongue. "What we have is just a...-"
"Fling?" Jimin asked in a quiet voice. Taehyung couldn't see his face, so he didn't know if this was anger speaking or Jimin thought the same.
"Uh...yeah...I mean, we knew this wasn't going...going anywhere." Even as he said it, Taehyung's heart trembled at the thought of not seeing Jimin the next day.
How was he supposed to survive the absence of Jimin in his life, when they were always glued to the hip. But it didn't matter. If Jimin liked Jungkook then he wasn't going to stop him from pursuing the boy.
After all, Taehyung hadn't wanted to acknowledge his feelings for Jimin. Maybe this was for the best...
"Okay." Taehyung watched Jimin's head bob in response. "I'll tell Jungkook how I feel." He said, but there was no happiness in his voice.
Taehyung wondered why, but didn't think much on it.
Turns out, Jungkook was hard not-to-like. And don't get him wrong, Taehyung had tried, he had tried millions of times to find faults in the other when Jimin finally started dating Jungkook.
But everybody loved him, and for a good reason – the boy was a sweetheart.
He respected his elders, bowed to his hyungs and helped everyone who asked him. He knew Jimin's favorite latte and provided him with notes, whenever needed, he even let Taehyung borrow his book from time to time, when the other forgot to bring the right textbook to class. No matter how hard Taehyung glared at him, Jungkook always gave him a soft smile, and his eyes -
Taehyung hated his all-knowing eyes.
The look Jungkook gave him, it was too shrewd, to clear for Taehyung's liking. Every time they stared at each other, Taehyung felt as if the boy was stripping him naked, down to his very soul. He hated it, and at the same time loved it.
It made him go crazy, knowing that Jungkook suspected his feelings for Jimin, and somehow that knowledge made him like Jungkook to a degree.
However, things got slightly out of hand, when Taehyung caught himself watching Jimin and Jungkook together and a strange warmth bloomed in his heart.
He knew he still loved Jimin. He had always loved him. But now, it was as if, his heart had grown in size to fit one more person in it.
Taehyung didn't want to except it, but it was true.
Somehow, his idiotic heart had fallen for both Jimin and Jungkook.
It was like this, Jimin was his childhood love that had grown into something more, mature and it burned slowly and surely in his heart. While, Jungkook and the love Taehyung felt for him, was refreshing, a breath of cool air, clearing his mind and letting him enjoy the wilderness of it.
Still, Taehyung was stubborn when it came to his own feelings, so he ignored them.
He hid them behind annoyance, and frustration, and tried his best to look the other way.
However, once Jungkook caught him in the bathroom trying to breathe through the messy storm brewing inside him.
And that brought about another change in their relation.
"Are you hurt?" He had asked, in that nerve-wrecking, calm and soothing voice.
It was the voice that Taehyung hated and loved.
He took a quick step back, and Jungkook followed him. "W-What do you want?"
"I'm asking if you're okay, Taehyung?"
The way his name rolled off Jungkook's tongue, it sounded so beautiful and Taehyung huffed in annoyance. "It doesn't matter how I feel."
"It does to me." Jungkook said, and without any warning, caught hold of his chin.
"Let me go." Taehyung grabbed the hand that was holding his face and pushed him, but Jungkook didn't budge. Instead, with a strength Taehyung didn't know Jungkook possessed, he pulled Taehyung close...impossibly close.
Taehyung suddenly felt breathless and worried his lips would touch Jungkook's if he moved an inch to the side. Jungkook on the other hand, didn't mind the closeness at all. In fact, a small, curious smile played on his lips.
"I'm asking you again, are you alright, Tae?"
'Tae' - it was the nickname Jimin had given him. And hearing it, snapped him back into action and Taehyung once again pushed Jungkook. This time, the latter fell back, letting go of Taehyung's chin.
"What the fuck do you think you're doing? Get lost!"
"I was only looking out for you." Jungkook replied. He was composed and talked in an amused tone. Taehyung didn't like it one bit.
"Go back to class." Taehyung said. "Jiminie must be waiting for you." He spat.
He couldn't help it.
The fact that he loved both of them, and the two were so far out of his reach – it made him mad...so so mad. And he hoped his anger would make things clear for Jungkook.
Unfortunately, it brought a wide smile on Jungkook's face, and the sharp look was back in his eyes – the one that made Taehyung want to cover his body with his hands.
"Are you jealous, Tae?"
"What?"
"Are you jealous of us dating?"
"What? N-No!" His stutter was answer enough, and Jungkook noticed. The smirk on his face grew.
Taehyung wanted to kick his face right that moment. Wasn't he supposed to be a good kid? Why was he torturing Taehyung like this?
Flirty with him, when Jimin was his boyfriend? Could it be?
Taehyung froze, an unbidding thought racing through his mind. His eyes snapped back, boring into Jungkook's face.
The ferocity of his gaze made Jungkook raise an eyebrow. "What?"
"Are you looking to cheat on Jiminie, with me?" Taehyung's voice was cold, and quiet. He knew what his face looked like – razor-sharp, with a murderous intent in his eyes. If Jungkook thought he could sway Taehyung by his touch, he was so wrong.
"What? That's absurd!" Jungkook chuckled and shook his head. "How are you so dense? I love Jimin! I would never do that!"
"Then what?" Taehyung crossed his arms across his chest. "What are you doing here? Why are you talking to me?"
"What? Is there a rule that says I can't talk to Jimin's best friend? His lover before me?"
Taehyung's face burned and he wanted to whack Jimin in the head. Why was his friend such a blabber mouth?
"I'm not his lover."
"Sure you aren't." Jungkook said with enough sarcasm that it stung Taehyung in the heart.
A silence swept upon them, and when Taehyung didn't say anything, Jungkook sighed.
"You know...he loves you."
"Of course. I'm his best friend! We grew up together."
"That's not what I meant." Jungkook said and Taehyung frowned.
On cue, the bathroom door opened and Jimin stepped inside. It was as if some sixth sense had led him to the place, and now Taehyung stared at the two of them.
"Taehyung..." Jimin looked at him, surprise evident in his eyes.
After Jimin had started dating Jungkook, Taehyung had stepped back, talking with Jimin only when needed. He had stopped returning calls, and had maintained his distance.
Now though, watching the way, Jimin's eyes looked at him in concern, Taehyung wondered if he had done the right thing.
Was it the right decision to have left Jimin's side.
Taehyung sighed. "If you don't have anything to say to me, I'm leaving."
"Wh-"
Before Jungkook could say another word, Taehyung made a beeline for the door, only to be stopped by a pair of desperate arms around his waist.
"Please..." Jimin breathed into his back. "Please stop running from me...please stop running from us."
Taehyung's heartbeat raised up a notch.
"Let me go." He hated how there was a tremble in his voice, but Taehyung turned the doorknob.
Again, another hand wrapped over his and Jungkook stood in front of him. "You aren't going anywhere."
"D-Did you two come here, with the plan to gang up on me." Taehyung raised his voice, letting the anger from all those months bleed into it.
Why couldn't they mind their own business and let him be? He had come to peace with his feelings, and there was nothing he wanted more.
"Do you love me, Tae?" Jimin asked in a whisper.
"Of course, Jimin. You know-"
"Then prove it." Jimin cut him off, and before Taehyung could react, he was turned around and pressed against the door, with Jimin's lips on his, kissing him aggressively.
Taehyung couldn't think straight. He tried to push him, but Jimin wouldn't let go. He used his tongue, teeth and everything he could to swallow Taehyung's breath and words from him.
Why was he doing this? Didn't he love Jungkook?
At this thought, Taehyung found Jungkook looking at him with a small smile. What was going on in his head? Wasn't he going to get his boyfriend away from him? What...what was happening?
"J-Jimin! Stop! Stop!" Taehyung finally managed to push away Jimin.
"Y-You have a boyfriend J-Jimin!" Taehyung said, trying to organize the thoughts in his head. He couldn't recall what the conversation before was. His head was a mess.
"He's my boyfriend, but you love him too." Jimin said, a little breathless, and licked at his puffy lips.
"Wh-"
"Don't deny it."
Taehyung blinked and instead of Jimin, Jungkook was now in front of him, the all-knowing glint back in his eyes.
"Stop! Stop!" Taehyung tried to push him away, before he could kiss Taehyung. But Jungkook had already calculated his reaction and grabbed his wrists, pushing them over his head and his teeth dug into Taehyung's collarbone.
Taehyung choked at the sensation on his neck, Jungkook's hot tongue licked and his teeth bite into the sensitive, sucking and pressing into him. "Please..." His voice came out broken, and Taehyung felt the wetness on his cheek.
He hadn't meant to cry, but his feelings, the chaos within him and now with Jimin and Jungkook's touch – he couldn't stop his body from arching into Jungkook's warmth. He hated it, and was helpless.
"Please...stop. Why are you doing this to me?" Taehyung mumbled, his head bowed, as Jungkook continued to place rough kisses on his skin.
Now, his body was pressed against Taehyung, and he knew he wasn't imagining the hardness between his legs.
"Do you understand now."
"No..." Taehyung hiccupped. Even though the answer was in front of him, his head couldn't process it.
How was it possible?
"God dammit! Tae!" Jimin cried and stomped to him, digging his fingers into Tae's chin. "I'm not going to let you run away from me again! Do you get it!"
"I fucking love you! Okay! Yes! I love Jungkook! But I love you too!"
"But-"
"I already knew about you Tae." Jungkook whispered into his neck. "I knew you loved Jimin as much as I loved him. And it made me happy."
"Yes-"
"And, I knew you loved me as well." Jungkook said, pressing again into him.
Taehyung's breaths came fast and shallow. Was this what he think it was?
"But you don't love me." Taehyung whispered. Even he could hear the lie in his words. The body pressed against him was proof, the feelings were mutual.
"Yeah. Of course he doesn't love you." Jimin said, rolling his eyes at Tae. "That's why we come together shouting your name."
Taehyung's eyes widened and his knees gave out under him, only Jungkook's hold on him kept him upright. The thought that the two of them shouted his name, while pleasuring each other...it was too much. His body was on fire now.
"When did you-"
"Since the beginning." Jungkook said and stepped back, letting go of Taehyung's hands.
"Jimin proposed to me, but also let me know that he stilled loved you."
"I felt incomplete without you Tae." Jimin said and caressed his cheek. "Don't you see? We complete each other – you, me and Jungkook, together."
"When I first laid eyes on you and Jimin, I knew I needed both of you in my life." Jungkook confessed, and for the first time, Taehyung saw the boy blush in front of him.
"Oh..."
"Yeah...oh-" Jimin grinned, his eyes turning into crescents. "He told me just as much, when I professed my love. We both needed you in our lives."
"But you were so hell-bent on avoiding us, on staying far from us that you left us no choice." Jungkook said, the briefest of guilt fleeting through his eyes, before being replaced by a smile. "We had to let you know that we both love you."
"F-For real?" Taehyung looked at Jimin and then at Jungkook.
They nodded in unison, and watching them like this, made Taehyung's worry disappear, causing his heart to flutter with a new found joy.
"I can't believe it." He whispered, more to himself than anybody else. "I can't believe it's true."
"It is." Twin voices echoed on his sides and looked up to see Jimin and Jungkook beside him, smiling at him.
"We love you so much, Tae." They both kissed his cheeks and Taehyung laughed, nodding as well.
"Me too...I love you!"
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