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It starts with a question.
"What do you think of James?" Sirius asks, sliding onto the seat next to her, not stopping until he's close enough to poke at the book she's reading. Stalled by her glare, he doesn't flip her book shut, but he does pout at her with the same gray eyes that Reg sees in the mirror every day.
Reg rolls her eyes and closes her book for him, pushing a paper inside it to keep her place. While she thinks about Sirius' question, she says, "I've never seen you in the library before. Aren't you worried about being kicked out?"
"Madam Pince likes me," Sirius tells her, looking smug.
Reg huffs. "Why?"
"It's my dashing good looks. And the fact that I've never damaged any of her books."
"You've never checked out any of her books."
"All the better." Despite his confidence, her brother's voice is quieter than Reg is used to. All too often, he's shouting and yelling and running around the school with his three best friends, visible in ways that Reg isn't. Occasionally, she gets caught up in Sirius' adventures in secret, mostly to get him out of trouble or to keep him from being caught, but she likes the shadows far more than direct sunlight. And Sirius, for all that his coloring his a match for hers, thrives only in the sun. Sirius pushes her textbooks aside as though they're what's keeping her from answering. "Tell me what you think of James."
Reg raises an eyebrow. Even at the very back of the library, where most don't venture, she isn't about to spill her heart out. That is only for girls' nights when Bellatrix and Narcissa are there to pat her hair and console her. "He's a Gryffindor."
"And?" Sirius prods.
"Your best friend."
"And?"
Reg tucks her hand under her chin and pretends to think long and hard about the issue. It's a contrast to the many times she's truly thought about it, but those times are under lock and wand. "He's a good flier."
Sirius sighs pointedly at her. He slouches in his seat and is the picture of petulance as he looks at her. "What do you think of him as a man?"
It's at this point that Reg knows she must shut the conversation down. "I know he's in love with Lily Evans. That's all I need to know."
"If she hasn't given him a second glace by now, she never will," Sirius says with some heat. "We're in our final year at Hogwarts. All I'm saying is that he can do better."
Reg hums in reply. She won't confirm or deny.
"Like, for example, my beautiful, witty sister, Regen Black. I've been thinking about it all week. James and I are meant to be brothers, that much is obvious. Fate just got our parentage mixed up. Since he doesn't have a sister for me to marry, it's up to him to do the work of making us brothers. Won't you at least consider it?"
"Absolutely not."
"Great, I knew you'd come around. Also, Rosier asked me to tell you that he can't attend Hogsmeade with you on account of him being a massive prat and spending time in the hospital wing. He's caught a nasty case of what seems to be dragon pox."
"How terrible for him," Reg drawls. She crosses her arms. "I assume his illness isn't so life-threatening that I can't visit him in the hospital wing?"
"Why would you want to?" Sirius' tone is barely above a whine. "He's a snake. You can't date a snake, Regie." Before she can argue, he adds, "I know you're a snake, but you're my perfect, innocent baby sister, and I can't just leave you in the clutches of some bastard Slytherin."
"He's actually very sweet," Reg says, just to be contrary. Her study session is no longer productive, so she shoves her papers and books in her school bag. "I'll see you around, Sirius."
"Think about what I said," he calls after her. "Think about James!"
Someone from a few rows away shushes him loudly. Reg slips away while Sirius gets into a shushing war with his newfound rival. The way to the hospital wing is familiar. She's rarely had a personal need for it, but Sirius is prone to drama and pranks, and hasn't always gotten away scot-free from his adventures.
Think about James, Sirius said.
Reg doesn't intend to do as Sirius asks. As a Slytherin, she fully embraces the trait of self-preservation, and her heart is just as important to preserve as the rest of her. Not even Slytherin ambition holds a candle to James' frequent and loud confessions of love to Lily. Reg isn't even in their year, but she's heard half a dozen confessions since beginning Hogwarts. The first had been on her train ride to Hogwarts as a new first year. She'd held Sirius' hand and worried about getting lost in the castle, as well as worrying about being disliked by Sirius' friends, especially the boy that even back then Sirius had considered a brother. The confessions that followed had been grand things like songs in the Great Hall and transfigured phoenixes leaving a message in fire across the sky, while the most recent confession had been quieter, a private moment that Reg hadn't meant to overhear. That had been a year ago and Reg has no doubt that the confessions have continued. She just hasn't been privy to them. One of these days, Lily will notice that James has grown, that his and Sirius' pranks have gotten smarter and less frequent, that his eyes are a lovely shade of hazel, and that will be it.
She may not have intended to think of James, but intentions don't tend to win against habit and sentiment.
Reg shakes her head at herself and opens the doors to the hospital wing. After confirming with Madam Pomfrey that she's here to visit her friend Evan, she's allowed through. She takes a seat at his bedside.
"Oh, Evan," Reg sighs, taking in his pitiful state.
Evan must not be hurt despite his looks, because he sits up in bed and his voice is loud as he snaps, "I'm going to kill your fucking brother."
He's never spoken to her like that before. Normally, Evan is one of the most handsome boys in her year. Reg had been able to admire his attractiveness even if his looks hadn't managed to inspire deep feelings within her. Now, he's all but unrecognizable, with purple scales protruding from his skin and horns emerging from his dark hair. Sirius had been facetious in calling this dragon pox, since it doesn't look anything like the disease, although Evan does resemble a dragon.
Unlike many of his other silly deeds, Sirius hadn't taken much care with this one if Evan knows enough to rage at her brother.
"Sirius has had a tough time lately," Reg tells him, reaching out to place her hand over Evan's in what she hopes is a comforting gesture. The scales have an interesting texture. "I'm not about to share private family details with you, but I can promise you, it hasn't been easy for him. Please remember that despite everything, he's my brother."
"He's a blood traitor," Evan spits out. "I'll— for you, I won't declare a feud, but I'm going to Dumbledore and my parents. He may be one of Dumbledore's pet Gryffindors, but he won't get away with this."
He's not hurt. He's just embarrassed, Reg decides, and considers her options. She's never been good at begging. She's done it only rarely, and only with her parents to be more lenient with her brother. Evan isn't about to hear her pleas. Not because he won't listen, but because she won't lower herself to begging when she has other options.
"The most important part of what I said," Reg tells him, speaking very carefully lest Evan be confused, "is that he is my brother."
Her wand slips out of her sleeve. Reg's hand is already resting against Evan's, so it's no work at all to make the most of a silencing charm and a few nice spells that do well with skin to skin contact. After Sirius, Bellatrix and Narcissa are her favorite Blacks, and she's learned quite a bit from her cousins. Sirius is too flashy and quite honestly too nice, no matter what Evan might claim otherwise. Sirius will be the one to carry the Black name to the next generation, but it is the Black daughters who will carry on the spirit of their family.
Reg pats his hand once again as Evan's silent screams begin to fall away. "You'd do the same for family, I'm sure. The spell will linger in your body. You really don't want to know what will happen if you try to get my brother in trouble with these lies."
She lets go of his hand. Before she stores her wand away, she conjures a vase and some flowers for Evan's bedside as a beautiful reminder of her visit.
From behind her, a familiar voice says, "Can I have some flowers, too?"
Reg turns around to find that the curtain that had separated the next bed from Evan's had been pulled open sometime after she sat down. James is the occupant of the other bed, and he's looking hopefully between her and his empty bedside table.
Think about James, Sirius said.
Dammit, she is. Reg focuses on forming the vase first, taking more care with it than she had Evan's. "What kind of flowers do you want?"
"I've always liked tulips."
It's not subtle. It's not Slytherin. She says it anyway. "Not lilies?"
James laughs and shakes his head.
Reg works on conjuring tulips for him. Variegated ones for the beautiful eyes she'd thought of earlier today and on previous occasions. It's the most innocent of meanings a tulip can have and she embraces it, unwilling to take a step. James is taken. Perhaps not officially, perhaps not at the present moment, but soon Lily will realize what a catch James is. This is only a small, temporary moment in the flow of time. Reg still makes the flowers look as perfect as she can. With the amount of care she puts into them, they won't fade for a very long time. She hopes that Madam Pomfrey will take care of them after James leaves the hospital wing. They may not be real, but they're lovely all the same.
"You're the one who keeps Sirius out of trouble," James says conversationally while she works. Reg doesn't raise her gaze from her work and lets him continue. "I didn't realize it until two years ago, but from the time you began Hogwarts, he seemed to have a guardian spirit throwing Felix Felicis his way."
"Someone has to save him from himself," Reg replies for lack of anything else she can say. James did see the whole thing just now. "I don't suppose you woke up after I was finished with Evan?"
James' smile should be classified as a spell in itself. "As far as I'm concerned, you were just visiting a friend. Why did Sirius hex him?"
"Sirius is going stir-crazy while you're cooped up in the hospital wing," Reg says, finishing with the flowers. She adds a red ribbon around the vase in a moment of whimsy and turns the bouquet James' way. "His other friends aren't enough to keep him busy. When will you be out of here?"
"It's your own Beaters' fault," James replies, but his tone turns absent as he sees the flowers. "They're beautiful. Thanks, Regen. For this and for looking out for Sirius."
Reg doesn't blush. It's a close thing. "He's family. There isn't anything I wouldn't do for him."
"Yeah," James agrees.
The warmth in his eyes is directed at her actions, not at her. Reg still imagines it for a moment, wishing that things were different. I'm thinking about him, Sirius. I have been.
They're not friends. They're just two people who care deeply for the same person. Reg leaves the hospital wing feeling flushed with James' regard, momentary and small as it is. It's fleeting on James' side and enduring on hers, and isn't that the problem? Tempers run hot in their family behind politeness and composure, and so do emotions.
By chance, Reg sees James leave the hospital wing later that day. He's carrying her vase and the flowers within it in a careful grip, avoiding crowds so that there's no chance of it falling to the ground. Reg hopes Sirius won't recognize her handiwork. It's embarrassing enough to care about one Gryffindor, let alone two. In the coming weeks, Sirius deters two more potential suitors like a particularly vengeful chaperone. Reg doesn't entirely mind, not when James keeps dropping by to laugh with her at Sirius' antics or ask her about her day.
It all comes together when she finds him waiting for her on Friday, greeting her just outside the Great Hall and looking determined in a way she's seen before. It's simply never been directed at her.
"Sirius is going to kill me for this," James says, glancing back into the Great Hall, where Sirius is looking their way from the Gryffindor table. "But will you go to Hogsmeade with me?"
For a moment, all she can think is that this is straight out of one of her daydreams. But this is real, from the bustle inside the Great Hall to the quiet moment just outside it, and to the way James looks at her like he finally sees her.
Reg doesn't agree immediately. "Are you still in love with Lily?"
"I'm not sure I ever was," James admits, his gaze not leaving hers, not even to glance at Lily in the Great Hall. "I never got the chance to get to know her enough for the real kind of love. She never let me. I know you better than I know her, and everything you do makes me want to find out more. I gave up on Lily a year ago. I'm just yours. If Sirius doesn't kill me first."
Reg fights the laugh that threatens to bubble within her. "You're really worried about Sirius?"
"You've seen the way he gets when someone asks you out."
Nodding somberly, she says, "He's very overprotective. Are you sure you want to risk your friendship like that?"
"We're brothers. He'll come around. At least I hope so."
"I think he will," Reg says, feeling lighter than air. She doesn't want to go further into the Great Hall, where she'll have to talk to people who aren't James. "Let's go for a walk?"
James smiles at her, all messy-haired and excited, and says, "I'd like that."
When Reg glances back, she sees Sirius motioning proudly at her and cheering silently. Reg sends an impolite gesture his way. It does nothing to lower Sirius' joy, nor her own. She's smiling as she turns back to James. Sirius will be so smug about this, but there's something wonderful about finally having James' attention and fulfilling a wish of Sirius' at the same time. Reg takes James' offered hand and lets the rest of the world fall away.