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The smell of burned metal creeps into Rey’s nose before her eyes open. The tangy scent is like an alarm bell in her head. She struggles to wrench herself from the blackness. Her mind is muddled, trying to catch up to itself. She must have blacked out after the explosion, because she doesn’t remember how she ended up on the floor in her quarters. The back of her head throbs where it made contact with the ground.
It! Is it ok? They’re after it!
She forces her eyes to open just a slit. Light filters in. Rey’s conscious mind has awoken before the rest of her body. A million thoughts rush in, but she can barely move her sore limbs. Once she’s able to squint past her own fuzzy vision, she spots the blackened R2 unit across the room.
She blinks. Confusion settles. What happened? Tendrils of smoke are still rising from the droid’s charred carcass. It was supposed to repair the temperature controls in her quarters. Something must have made it explode like that. A cold pit of dread drops in her stomach. She freezes.
Sabotage.
Her mind starts to race as her sluggish body struggles to catch up. That explosion changes everything. Someone is trying to kill her, and they’ve just gotten past security. And it’s not just her they’re after.
The memory of Ben’s face flashes behind her eyes. This wasn’t supposed to happen. She wasn’t supposed to be left alone. She clutches her belly. It’s still so early. Panic rises. Alarms have been blaring. She hasn’t heard them until just now, when everything comes crashing back.
“Rey! Are you ok?”
Poe’s voice booms from the hallway outside the door.
No! Rey tries to struggle to her feet. The room is spinning. She needs to think of a plan, fast.
The alarm in Poe’s voice is undeniable. He rushes into her room, eyes wild. Bits of warped metal and wires rustle around as Rey pushes herself off the ground. She just wants him to go away. She doesn’t want any of this.
“Rey!” Poe yells when he sees her. He dashes across the wreckage to help her up. All he’d known is that there was a report of an explosion in her quarters. Dropping everything without a second thought, he’d beaten the security team.
“What happened? Are you ok?”
The questions tumble out. His dark eyes are filled with concern.
“I… I think I’m ok. The R2 unit...it just exploded out of nowhere," she stammers, her mind still reeling. Inside herself she’s desperately searching for any signs that it’s alive. Beads of sweat form on her brow as the security team streams in, armed and ready. They need to run a full scan of her quarters.
Rey strains to sense any sign of life inside her. A flutter, or a woosh. Anything. Desperation claws at her, and her heart pounds. She needs to know it’s alive. But there is no answer. It’s too soon to know without a medical exam.
“Rey?”
Poe’s voice jerks her back to the moment. Back to the aftermath of a failed assasination attempt.
“Rey, we need to get you to the med bay, you’re hurt.”
Poe loops one of her arms over his shoulder and helps her to her feet. For just one moment she allows herself to lean on his strength. But her mind is racing, and she can barely breathe. She can’t go to the med bay. No one can know her secret. Not yet.
“ No!”
Her objection comes out more emphatically than she intended. But she can’t let them find out! She feels around at a cut on her forehead. It’s sticky with blood, but not deep. She’d been hovering around near the R2 unit when it blew up. It was sheer luck that most of the shrapnel had somehow missed her.
“But we need to get you out of here, and have the security droids sweep the room. Let’s get you to the med bay.” Poe tries to herd her along. She yanks her arm away from him.
“I’m fine, General, just a little banged up is all.”
Ben, I wish you were here.
He should be here. She is beginning to think the Force has played a cruel joke on her. She remembers his life force flowing into her, reviving her, on Exogal. Neither of them could have known a new life was created in that moment too. A fusion of him and her. And now she’s left alone.
Poe frowns. He’s worried. Does he suspect? Rey can’t bear to think what would happen if she told him. Or any of her friends. They would try to be nice, but none of them would understand. Pity and disgust would hide behind their surprise. Kylo killed many of their friends, and families. They will never forgive him.
Rey knows she has been distant lately. A cauldron of emotions. She doesn’t know how she should feel. Part of her is paralyzed with dread, and wants to run away from it all. Leave everything behind. But the problem is everywhere she runs, it will still be there, if it’s still alive.
A wave of nausea swells inside her and her stomach turns. She tries to conceal it, but her heart leaps. Could it be? Composing herself, Rey forces her tone to remain more even this time. She needs him to believe her.
“General, I’m fine. I’ll get it checked out later. Now, we need to get to the command center, and initiate a security sweep of the base.”
Poe nods, reassured by her confident tone.
“Right, I’m putting the base on lockdown, and I could use your help. Whoever tampered with that droid could still be here. I don’t want you to be alone until we’ve searched the entire vicinity. Whoever did this isn’t getting away if I have anything to say about it!”
Relief. Rey manages a weak smile. She’s kept her secret a little while longer.
*Many thanks to IvyLeigh for graciously lending me the original pregnancy concept