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Truly, Madly, Deeply
After several weeks Gail finally had a weekend off and what a better way to start her free time than a celebration at the Penny. And good booze she really deserved. Being a training officer was fun but also very tiring. She wondered if they were such suckers too when they had entered 15th division as rookies all those years ago.
Just when she got her order and spun around to leave the counter, she found herself face to face with a person she had not seen for almost two years. Dark hair falling down on the shoulder in gentle waves, those chocolate eyes which she kept seeing in her dreams and that typical lop-sided grin which could make her melt inside. "Hi," the newcomer greeted shyly.
"Holly," sighed the blond cop still trying to get a grip over her shock. "What…? What are you doing here?"
"Job done, accreditation received, so now I can do more nerdy stuff for you guys and help solve crimes more effectively," shrugged the doctor, trying to sound nonchalantly but still with a bashful smile.
"What are you doing here in Toronto? Shouldn't you be in California or somewhere else?"
"I came home, to you," she said sincerely, catching the blue eyes with her own.
"You can't just leave me and then come back like nothing had happened," the younger woman argued, trying her best to get her thoughts and emotions in line.
"Honey, you know I had to leave. I hoped we could talk it over," said Holly in a gentle tone.
"I don't do talking," the cop turned around and dashed away.
"Gail, will you stop walking out on me?!" the brunette called, defeated.
The other woman quickly looked over her shoulder only to see Holly still standing in the middle of the space, looking her way. Gail could not take it. It was too much of an emotional roller-coaster at once. She was not sure which emotion she should choose to think about or feel. Deep in her thoughts, she bumped into someone. She murmured a quick "sorry" and reached for her coat.
"Gail, what is going on?" asked Frankie, catching her by the arm and pulling her closer before she could bump into anyone else.
"Not now," called the blonde angrily and ran out.
The female detective approached the woman who caused such a distress to her friend. "Are you a friend or an enemy?" she asked directly.
"Depends on the point of view," replied the scientist and left the pub as well.
Back in her room, Gail locked herself, settled down by her bed and let tears fall freely. She did not even know she was holding them, until she felt them on her cheeks, rolling down. And might they roll. Her chest ached and head spun with all the thoughts of "what ifs" and "what nows".
Gail had no idea how much time had passed since she met the forensic pathologist. She did not count minutes or hours or even days. Her rookie noticed something was wrong, because Gail almost never let him drive. "Hey, Sir, is everything okay?" asked the young man. "I am not complaining but for the whole week you have been more quiet than usual."
"Then don't start complaining and keep rolling." She looked out of the window again deep in thoughts. She wanted to talk to the special scientist but what was she supposed to say? What would Holly say? And that damn blue feeling appeared again. It was a mixed feeling of anger and betrayal. Nevertheless the very first question was if Holly would apply for a job with accreditation so far away at the first place if Gail had not walked out on her that fateful night at The Penny and then kept ignoring her calls. What if Gail came to her senses much sooner and let the doctor explain herself? What if she had not been a runaway teenager and behaved like an adult and they talked?
Her train of thoughts was interrupted with their radio buzzing a domestic disturbance. When they reached the scene, there was no disturbance anymore, just a dead male body stabbed into the chest and loads of blood everywhere.
"Alright," Oliver sighed, "This is the second murder in two weeks; we need to catch the guy and fast. Peck and Peckling, you wait here for the forensics and make them work fast and precise."
"What, no!" protested Gail. What if it meant a certain pathologist coming to this scene? She would like to avoid the unavoidable for a little bit longer. She was not ready yet.
"We don't have time to argue. I need your influence on this. Unless Holly takes it in her hands we are doomed." The Staff Sergeant came closer to her and whispered. "You can thank me later." With that comment he left the scene.
Gail wondered if luck was her best friend or worst enemy. Of course it was the certain forensic pathologist who came to the scene.
"Hey, Miss Lunchbox, you are not allowed here," called her rookie.
Immediately his training officer slammed him to his chest by the back of her hand, harder than necessary. "Forensic pathologist and that is not a lunchbox but a forensic kit," Gail jumped in in the defence.
"I see someone is up to the medical jurisprudence," Holly smiled her typical grin and the blond officer recognized a feeling which was put into a slumber for so long, or mostly buried under a heap of bitterness and sadness. "Hi," she greeted softly.
The cop could swear her heart skipped a beat. "Good to see you too," contrary to her inner emotions and believes, her voice betrayed her and half cracked.
"Erm, Sir -?"
"Don't you dare to ask," the training officer warned her ward.
All was packed and bagged and an hour later Gail found herself at the morgue. She sent her rookie to start the paperwork while she spent the time at the lab. She borrowed one of the magazines about pathology and pretended to read, while in fact she peeked over the edge to see Holly working. There was something magnetic about watching the scientist bury deep in the work which made her forget about the world around.
"Oh no," Holly yelped in surprise, straightening up. "Gail, out!" she yelled, pulling of her gloves.
"What?" asked the officer, being called out of her daydreaming.
The brunette took a few long steps to the cop, and pushed Gail out of the room. "Out now!" she called again, ushering her visitor from the laboratory. The doctor hit an alarm button on their way out and the door started beeping and closing until they were completely sealed.
Gail looked over her shoulder and noticed a fog and steam coming out of the body on the table. "What the hell was that?"
"First detox shower, then explanation. C'mon get undressed," commanded the doctor, undoing her own clothes.
"Wait, wait, wait," protested the still confused cop. "What has just happened?"
"Gail, get out of the clothes now!" On one hand the blonde had to admit she liked this commanding and into-action Holly, but really, taking a shower together, without any clothes? It was as if the other woman read her thought. "Honey, it is not the first time I see you dressed like Eve and even though I would love to show you my appreciation for such a dress code, I am not very keen on doing so in decontamination shower." She helped the cop out of her clothes and pushed her into the shower corner, closing the glass door and pouring very neatly smelling water on both of them.
Gail was still shocked and perplexed. Being naked in a shower with the woman that marked her life so deeply, especially when she felt her body temperature raise, it was confusing, and exciting. Gail pinched the bridge of her nose to gain some sense. Suddenly she felt her hair being rubbed with a shampoo as Holly was washing it. "Gail, I know this is awkwardly sexy situation but now it is not the time or place to space out. A haz-mat guy will be here soon. We need to get changed."
Just when they finished dressing in the typical blue V-neck t-shirt and pants, someone in a protection suit and detection device in hand came in. "Hey, Doc, what happened here?" asked a young man with a face protection shield up.
"That's for me to find out after you determine how dangerous it is in there," said Holly looking into the fogged room. Then she turned her gaze at the floor and started pacing, murmuring something to herself.
The officer tried to settle her thoughts about what had just happened, but the memory which stuck in her mind was that she had attended a shower with the woman of her life and no clothes what so ever. It was like a dream coming true but with a twisted end. Watching her pacing and thinking brought back memories, good memories and also feelings. Gail could not deny them but also she did not want to accept them. She felt so upset. At the end she cleared her throat to get the brunette's attention. "I am going to the station to get my spare uniform and well, grab something to eat."
"Yeah, sure," Holly looked her up and down. "Not that this doesn't suit you, but the uniform is what makes the kick." She gave her a smug grin and the other woman just rolled her eyes, turning around but with a smile of her own. "Oi, Gail," called the doctor, causing the officer to stop and turn back. "Take my coat. It is chilly outside."
"Are you sure?" the cop raised her eyebrows. "I thought you would not share my things."
The older woman laughed heartily, remembering their drunken time in a coat room. "I am cool with you sharing my things, I just wouldn't wear yours. Well, maybe your uniform shirt, just the uniform shirt," she emphasised with a twinkle in her eyes. Gail gulped but said nothing as she noticed the other lab person pulling up the facial shield of his suit.
"Hey, Doc," he called. "The air is clear. Stinks like hell, but clear. It must have been the liquid," he took off his protection mask completely and pressed a button which caused some ventilators working. "Just let the fans do their magic and you are good to continue."
Gail shifted her gaze to look inside the dissecting room while the fog was clearing and she noticed the damage which look like some acid was spilled over a half of the body, the flesh was gone, just bones were left. "What now?"
Holly looked at the stone table and sighed. "Well, I have to work with what we have left and then cook the bones and hope there will be some clues. It will take a few hours."
"Alright, I am going to the station now. Will you give me a call?"
"Of course. And you can bring lunch."
Gail hummed and quickly turned around; nevertheless she did pull herself up to take the offered coat. When she was behind the corner she stopped and peeked in again. The pathologist was back working with the dead body and the officer had to admit that the doctor's outfit suited Holly very well.
She arrived at the station to change into her spare uniform. The coat was warm and smelled nice, so Holly, and the blonde did not want to take it off. Her emotions still were a roller-coaster but maybe staying a little while just like that could calm her thoughts and nerves.
"Hey Gail," greeted Traci. "I hope you are not thinking about a change of careers," she noted and she looked at her colleague's clothes.
"Let's say it did not go well and somebody tried to destroy the evidence."
"Are you alright?"
"Yeah, it just sucks. I will have to go back to the morgue."
"I believe you don't mind that much now when Holly's back," winked Traci and left the changing room. "By the way, her coat looks good on you too," she called back over her shoulder.
"Hey, Zander, what do you have on the dead guy?" asked the training officer, coming to her rookie.
"Military guy, no super soldier, but good soldier, no enemies, no girlfriend, no boyfriend, no reason to be killed," said the young man, reading his notes. "He was released from the service six months ago, but no records about him since then. How did it go at the morgue? You are back fast. Did the doc crack the cause of death?"
"Except the obvious stabbing into his chest, not yet, somebody tried to destroy the evidence. I will go back in a few."
"Uh-huh," murmured the rookie with a small sly smile.
Gail gave him a cold stare but said nothing.
In a couple of hours later Gail was back at the laboratory with a sandwich and a cup of coffee. Yes, she still remembered Holly's favourite. She entered the autopsy room and noticed the pathologist on a ladder, looking at the now only skeleton from the last step. Her gaze was switching from the bones to photos of previous victim pinned on the opposite wall.
"Holly, what the hell -?"
The doctor looked down at her and smile. "Sometimes you just need another point of view," she replied looking the other woman straight in the eyes. Of course that answer was not meant only for the recent examination. She got down from the ladder and took Gail's hand to drag her to the space between the table with the skeleton and the wall with photos. At the touch the cop felt her breath hitched. There was a jolt of electricity and she recognised the meaning. Well, she had always known but this time she realised those were the signs of higher power, yet she chose to ignore them. "Look at these injuries here and at the previous victims," explained the pathologist. "They are the same places, same force. Well, the first victim suffered more damage, because she was a woman and even though I have not seen the original body and I am working only with photos, according to her pelvis bone I dare say she was pregnant."
"So you are saying that these two banged together, he knocked her up and a third person, most likely the beau of this lady killed them both."
"That's my estimate, but I am not an officer of the law. Plus the killer is a military soldier himself with high interest in chemicals."
"How can you tell?" frowned the younger woman.
"The force and angle of the injuries, that's a military training. And the way he tried to destroy the evidence, it was a home-made chemical cocktail."
"I have to run to the station." She turned to leave.
"Gail, I believe I deserve a date," the other woman stopped her in her tracks.
"I thought it's your job. Plus you have your meal and coffee."
"Which I thank you for, but I still want that date and talk."
The officer just waved her hand goodbye and left to report the news. It did not take long for the detectives and other police force to catch the bad guy. Actually he was not even resisting and admitted his crimes, saying there was nothing for what he should live anyway.
The next occasion Gail saw the special doctor happened three weeks later when there was a body found in a nearby forest. It was pretty much like their very first meeting, except this victim still had some flesh on and its leg was torn away. Gail's rookie was taking statements from a couple who found the body, while she was guarding the scene. Not that she was ever social, but since Holly was back, she practically avoided any unnecessary contact with other human beings.
"Hey, Lunchbox, you are not…" she trailed off when she noticed who was the forensic pathologist, "Holly," she sighed.
"Hi, Officer," greeted the brunette. It could be visible as her smiley face turned into a frown. She took a long distance from the decomposed body and looked around. It appeared as she was looking for something, her dark eyes scanning the scene and ground. She watched her every step as she was getting closer to the corpse nevertheless she approached slowly and measured every inch of the ground.
"Holly, what -" the cop started talking, as she came closer, but was stopped immediately.
"Not another step," commanded the doctor, rising up her hand.
But Gail was already on the move. In a slow motion she watched as Holly dropped her forensic kit and practically jumped on her, taking her away from the place of crime and pinned her down on the ground. Holly turned on her left side and Gail pulled up on her elbows within a second to see why she was jumped on by the scientist. A loud noise was heard as a bomb was set off and the forensic kit was blown into pieces. Holly covered the officer body by her own, pinning her down to the ground again as pieces of glass and metal were falling down on them like rain. Gail was in shock, nevertheless no matter how stunned she was, she could feel the brunette's presence on her own body, her perfume, her soft dark hair escaping the messy ponytail and creating a veil around their heads, her breath on the cop's neck. And the officer had to admit she would love a position like this however under different circumstances and at some private place.
Both women were breathing heavily as Holly slowly pushed up on her arms and turned on her left side again, carefully shaking the glass and metal from her head and jacket. "Are you alright?"
"What has just happened?" the smaller of them asked confused.
"Landmine." Holly stretched out her hand and pulled the other woman on her feet.
Before Gail could say another word the police team surrounded them, offering help and asking questions. The blonde cop ignored them and looked at the ground. If it was not for Holly, she would step on another mine and it would be her leg shattered into pieces and not a forensic kit.
"How did you know?" asked Gail ignoring the havoc around them.
Immediately the pathologist turned her attention to the younger woman, so Sam ordered somebody to call for ETF team. "I have seen these injuries before. The leg was separated from the rest of the body. Separation like this caused the femoral artery to rip off, therefore the guy here died because of loss of blood. Very similar to soldiers who died in battlefields full of mines."
"But how did you know?" the blonde repeated her question, not really meaning the unfortunate person, but the metal killer. "About the landmine."
"Internship in Iraq."
If Gail wanted to ask more questions, she did not have the chance as ETF people surrounded the scene to find and secure the ground before anybody else was allowed in to collect the evidence.
"Sir, let me take you to the station. It's not like we can do anything anymore here. Dov and Jayden will take over now," said the rookie pulling his still shocked trainer away.
Just when they were climbing the hill, the said couple arrived. Dov stopped his colleague, placing his hands on her shoulder. "You are alright," he assured her.
"Is this how it feels to be bombed out?" she asked.
"Well, I was standing on a bomb for a few hours, you haven't even stepped on it," he commented with a small smile.
Gail turned back around and her eyes met the warm brown ones. The officer nodded her thanks. She was slowly getting over the original shocked and ordered her rookie to go to the station and start doing the paperwork. She leant against a certain forensics' car, folding her arms on her chest, looking down at the scene. Her eyes did not leave the scientist who pointed to a few spots and then she returned back to her vehicle.
"Are you alright?" Holly asked tentatively when she noticed the cop waiting by her car.
"Thank you. Really thank you," Gail let her arms down and put them into her pockets as she looked at her saviour. "You have just saved my life there."
"Don't mention it. But I do believe I deserve the date now," the doctor smirked.
"Next Saturday night, 7 o'clock at The Penny," said the blond woman and left. Before entering Sam's car, who offered a ride to the station, she looked back and noticed as Holly pulled out another lunchbox, with a smile across her face and went back to the place of accident. "Be careful down there," called the cop.
Saturday night arrived sooner than she would imagine and Gail was not sure if she should be excited or frightened. She knew what she felt for Holly; the feelings never disappeared, especially during these days when they were meeting on the scenes, at the laboratory or station. On the contrary, her feelings were growing; nevertheless the anger was still there. Having a rookie by her side changed her a lot. It was like taking care of a child sometimes and no matter how mad she could be at him, she knew he deserved a punishment, but her usual no-talking, running away attitude was not an option. Maybe it was time to stop using it at all and not only towards babies. She remembered all the good and bad times she spent with the special woman and she recalled how down she felt when Holly had told her she was seeing someone else. How she realised the hollow in her chest when the brunette was not around anymore. And when she admitted her stupid silent behaviour, she got lucky enough that her special person came back, but life wanted them to be separated again. Nevertheless the scientist was back now. And she kept fighting for her. So why was Gail so resistant? Was it really so hard to accept the goodness in life? To let the anger go and be happy again? Because Holly made her happy.
Before she could wonder any longer, the special doctor found their booth bringing two drinks with her. "Hi," she greeted with her charming smile.
"Hey," replied Gail, looking her up and down. She had to wonder how the brunette did it to look casual yet elegant and sexy as hell at the same time.
There was a moment of awkward silence which Holly used to take off her coat and sat beside her… date, actually. "How are you doing today?" she asked breaking the weird quiet.
"Desk duty, boring. You?"
"Staring into a microscope, boring as well."
There was another uncomfortable moment. Gail usually did not mind silence but this was nerve wrecking. "Is it always so weird when exes meet?" she asked finally.
"I don't know, Gail. You are the only one I have ever kept chasing," answered the older woman honestly.
"Why?"
"You are worth it."
"Why?" asked the blonde again, stressing the question. "I am immature, dark, snarky, ironic -"
"Dedicated, passionate, brave," continued the doctor for her. "You put on this abrasive attitude but inside you have a beautiful soul. You never give up. You would go to the hell and back to help someone. You care about people and you want to make the world a better place. Due to your family's expectation, you try to look like you do not really care, because you don't want other cops to think that it is all only a favour of your family name. You play on a thin line, but you would never betray a friend."
"Oh shut up, sweet talker," the younger woman could feel her cheeks coloured. She was very grateful for the dim light of the pub.
"Tell me I am wrong," the doctor challenged her.
Gail looked her in the eyes. Those eyes she would love to keep seeing in her life more often again but the anger with the feeling of betrayal took over. "And despite that you left me."
"You know I had to. I told you I needed that accreditation to be able to do more nerdy work. San Francisco Laboratories offered all credits I needed at once. Our paths would separate for some time, therefore I suggested keeping in touch, I believed in us, but you shut me off."
"Long distant relationships never work," Gail was still resistant even though she knew the scientist was right. They had a long sleepless night before the day of flight, yet in the morning the blonde disappeared before her partner had woken up.
"We could have tried," opposed the other woman.
"Come on, Holly, you have been away for almost two years. How would you want to keep that working? The better idea was to just… move on."
"I have never moved on, not even tried," admitted the doctor. The blonde took a long gulp from her glass; she did not want to hear the following potential question which would come for sure. "Have you?" And here it was. She took another long gulp, side glancing at a certain female detective. "Oh," sighed the pathologist, noticing the direction where the blue eyes looked. "Okay, well, maybe the date was a bad idea after all." She shifted to the side of their booth, reaching for her coat.
The cop suddenly missed the warmth; she missed the woman no matter how upset she still felt. As if a lightning bolt hit her mind, her thoughts cleared up. She was certain that if she let her special someone go, it would hurt herself more than the other person. Maybe it was time to stop being childish and speed up the process of maturing and talk actually. "I've never said I did. Why did you come back?" she asked suddenly.
"I always come back," whispered Holly with a small yet sad smile.
"I know. You were there since the beginning," nodded the officer, remembering the moments, her new friend was there for her in the times of need. "You gave me a lift to the station and then home after that Robert Robins case. You agreed to be my plus one for my boss's wedding even though we had barely known each other. You saved me from another bad date my mother was about to set me up on. You came for me to the hospital when I was injured even though I'd had a fellow co-worker there who could take me home. You came to check up on me when you heard there was a shooting on cops. And even though I brushed you off, you came to the hospital when I needed you. You tried to reach me when I was behaving like a brat and not talking to you. When I got some sense again you came to me, telling me you broke your recent relationship for me. Why do you come back when I keep pushing you away?"
"Do you really have to ask?" the other woman tilted her head with raised eyebrows.
"I don't get it. Why are you doing it?" slowly she was giving in but not just yet, not fully.
Holly chuckled however without any joy, and put on her coat. "There are powers greater than us and no matter how you put yourself down, I still see this amazing woman who is worth the world."
"But why? How can you?" the officer had an idea, but she wanted to be sure. She was never good in relationships therefore she needed to hear it out loud. She needed to know before letting go of her anger which was her anchor and companion for so long.
The brunette gave her a sad smile and stood up. "Goodnight Gail."
Now that was a very unfortunate choice of words and tone of voice. Definitely it was not what Gail wanted to hear. So she watched her to leave. But before exiting the bar, Holly approached a jukebox, inserted a coin and pressed some buttons. She placed her hands back in the pockets of her coat, staring at the music box. A few moments later the first tones started playing and the dark orbs met confused blue ones. A small smile appeared on her lips; alas the expressed emotion did not reach the chocolate coloured eyes. Actually they might glisten with tears. The doctor turned around and left the pub.
I'll be your dream
I'll be your wish
I'll be your fantasy
I'll be your hope
I'll be your love
Be everything that you need
The blonde stared at the empty space by the door where her favourite scientist had been a few seconds ago. The wheels in her head started rolling, clicking and setting in the right places.
I'll love you more with every breath
Truly, madly, deeply do
I will be strong
I will be faithful
'Cause I'm counting on
A new beginning
A reason for living
A deeper meaning, yeah
Gail finished her drink in one last gulp, grabbed her jacket and dashed outside of the bar.
I wanna stand with you on a mountain
I wanna bathe with you in the sea
I wanna lay like this forever
Until the sky falls down on me
Not really sure where she was heading, she ran out of the door looking around. What would be her chance to notice one person on a street of a busy Saturday night? Alas desperate times called for desperate measures. Still she was not sure if luck was her friend or enemy. In this case, luck was on her side as she noticed Holly leaning against the closed wing of the pub. Her head tilted backward, one knee bent as her foot rested against the wooden door, her hands deep in the pockets of her coat as usual.
"You are a moron, you know that?!" called Gail. She noticed the doctor to turn her head her way as tears were falling down her cheek, glistening in dim light. "You should have convinced me more to keep in touch." The blonde felt her own eyes getting wet, but continued, "I am a moron too. I should have listened to you and just grow up and stop being this scardy cat. You are the love of my life and I let you go, again. I am not sure if you are a fool or naïve for not giving up on me, but I am so damn grateful you haven't." Gail felt as her voice was cracking with every step, she came closer to the other woman. "I am so sorry," she almost whispered, as she places her hands on Holly's waist tapping their foreheads gently together.
The brunette put her hands on the pale cheeks, pulling the blond head up. She met the cerulean blue eyes and whispered, "I just love you." She leant in, waited a heartbeat before connecting their lips. It was as if somebody set fireworks. The heart's speed increased for both of them like they were running from coast to coast and back. Gail returned the kiss with no less intensity and passion. The roar of rushing blood in their ears dimmed the noise of the street and their minds went blank, only feelings were allowed to express themselves and every ounce of those emotions they poured into the kiss which was not supposed to end anytime soon. There was no one and nothing else in the world, just two souls that found each other again, rejoicing at the re-connection which was delayed for way too long.
Out of breath they pulled away, huge smiles appeared on their faces. There was a light of headlights as a car was passing by, waking them up from their lost world. "Let's get out of here, before we will get arrested for PDA," suggested the officer.
Holly laughed heartily, wrapped her left arm around her partner's waist as they were ready to go to some more comfortable place where they would not be disturbed while professing their love.
The End