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Peter didn't know how long he'd been lying down on the couch.
He'd been staring at the coffee table for hours at this point, waiting desperately for the dark abyss to swallow him whole.
Sleep didn't come easily to him nowadays. It hovered around the edges, most of the time, but it never consumed him completely like he so desperately wished that it would. There was no point in it anyways, seeing as he'd always wake up as fast as if a gunshot had sounded, heart beating fast, sweat matting his forehead and breathing as if he'd just surfaced from deep waters. Time had taken on a different form thanks to this, it dragged on more than it ever has, and it served for more quiet moments to think. More moments to think about the five year catastrophe that was the Snap, as people are now apparently calling it.
The five year gap in his life was as abrupt as the transition from summer to winter. What were once memories full of warmth and tenderness were now forever frozen in time. Now, all he could do was watch idly from afar as the world continued to spin around him with a dizzying tune, like a song from only the oldest of childhood memories, slowly slipping out of his reach as quick as the colorful autumn leaves, leaving behind a fleeting sense of helplessness.
He pushes his nose deep into the couch cushion and closes his eyes with a heavy sigh. Distantly, he hears the front door being pushed open, along with the rustle of bags and heels clicking against the hardwood floor, but he's too deep inside his own head to care. If he's being honest, all he even wants to do right now is to wallow in his self pity and let the couch swallow him whole.
He curls into himself further when the cushions dip beneath him as May settles herself between Peter's legs and the end of the couch. "I know you're awake." She says, a tinge of amusement in her tone.
Peter rolls over with a sigh "Hi." He blinks up at her blearily and frowns petulantly.
"Hey," May leans over to carefully smooth away the hair out of Peter' eyes as she shakes her head amusedly. "Are you alright?" She lays her hand on the crown of his head when Peter nods, her touch warm and tender. "You sure?" She asks.
"May, I'm fine. Promise." He says, giving her the most reassuring smile he can muster.
May sighs and squeezes his shoulder. "There's some Thai from yesterday in the fridge if you're hungry." She leans forward and presses a slow kiss to his forehead.
May's presence, he found, was one of the only remaining constants left of his old life, a warm reminder that this new life isn't as bad as he sometimes thinks.
Peter shakes his head and cracks a small smile. "It's okay, I ate earlier."
"Hm…" She purses her lips, looking at him like she does whenever she's deep in thought. Then, she stands up. "Alright, come on. Put your jacket on." She says, a hand on her hip.
Peter sits up, now more alert. "What?" He asks.
"We're going for a walk." May says.
"May, I don't-" He cuts himself off at May's stern look and sighs deeply. "Fine…" He grumbles. Begrudgingly, he stands up. Rubbing a fist against his eyes, he grabs a discarded hoodie from the back of the couch and quickly slips it on, along with a pair of shoes.
May opens the door as soon as he approaches her and smiles. "Ready to go?" She asks, and Peter merely shrugs.
The journey outside was...quiet, to say the least. May obviously had something in mind, and while Peter was dreading to know what it was, he couldn't deny that he was a little curious, too.
As soon as they walk through the doors of the lobby, a wave of cold hit him, seeping through his fingers and toes as he released a full body shiver.
May turns around from where she's standing just a few steps in front of him, and waves him over. As soon as he's within reach, she links their arms together and continues to guide them through the busy streets.
May shivers and laughs. "It's a little chilly out here, isn't it?"
"Y-Yeah, it is." He forces a small laugh of his own, but he knows May doesn't buy it. If anything, she looks even more worried now.
Even so, she smiles. Stilted and obviously a little fake, but still a smile nonetheless. "Good thing I made you wear the jacket, right?" She says, nudging his shoulder playfully. When she receives no reaction from him, the smile falls from her face, immediately making something in Peter's chest tighten with trepidation.
May tilts her head back and sucks her lower lip between her teeth before sighing, expression turning solemn. "Alright, I didn't want to spring this onto you immediately, but…" She turns to look at him. "Peter, is there something you want to tell me about?"
Peter straightens his posture and shakes his head almost frantically. "No, I'm okay." He says, hoping he sounds convincing enough.
"That's not what I asked." May purses her lips. "You know, I’m worried about you.” She admits quietly.
A twinge of guilt pinches him somewhere in his ribcage at that. “I know, I'm sorry…" He looks down, burying his free hand inside his hoodie pocket in a poor attempt to stop it from shaking.
May only sighs deeply. “I know you're strong and capable of taking care of yourself but...watching you do this to yourself is torture, kiddo." Her bottom lip trembles slightly just as she closes her eyes for a brief second. "I know you're a lot like Ben in that regard, with the whole...wanting to take the whole weight of the world on your shoulders thing but…you don't need to. And it's killing me that you're trying so hard to hide it from us, because we can help you."
Peter didn't have to ask who 'us' was, he already knew.
"Please...talk to me, honey…" May murmurs, her hand gently caressing his cold cheek. There's a deeply rooted worry in her words, concern and apprehension and such a desperate need to help.
He wishes he could brush it all away, wishes he could force a smile and pretend that he wasn't completely and utterly shaken.
But he can't. He’s exhausted. Completely drained. And the emotions that are rolling around in his chest are growing louder and darker and more poisonous by the second.
Which is why they stop to sit on a bench. Peter knows better than to have this conversation while standing. "I don't- um-" He wrings out his wrists and looks up at May, who only gives him a reassuring nod. He takes a deep breath, let's it out, and then starts talking, carefully ignoring the rush of nervousness that runs through his fingers. "Some- Sometimes I wish they hadn't brought me back…like, after- after the snap..." He murmurs, tucking his hands into his lap to avoid fiddling with them.
He looks up at the May's harsh intake of breath, only to get his own breath stuck in his throat. Her eyes are wide and teary, now caught in Peter's gaze in a way that adds yet another ache to his heart, throwing one more stone onto the pile weighing down his shoulders. There's so much fright and concern there and Peter hates that he's the cause of it. He hates it, hates it, hates it.
He purses his lips and shifts his gaze onto somewhere between her ear and shoulder. "I know that sounds really, really awful and I’m not- I’m not ungrateful, but I just- everyone's already moved on and- and I know they’re trying really hard to...not make me feel out of place but sometimes I just really…” His breath hitches and he looks down at his hands just as a tear trails down his chin. “I do feel out of place and-“ He covers his face with his hands and releases a quivering breath. “I don’t know what to do. And it sucks…” He bites out, voice cracking.
There's a moment of silence which he just spends trying hastily to control the whirlwind of emotions swirling inside him, and he nearly jumps out of his skin when he feels May's hands over his own. She gently curls her fingers around both his wrists, carefully prying them away from his face. “Oh, kiddo…” She breathes out, voice laced with deep sympathy as she laces her fingers with his own.
Peter inhales shakily, a harsh whimper escaping his lips at the action. "May…" He chokes out desperately through the unshed tears that are burning behind his eyes.
He can hardly breathe now, icicles pushing their freezing tips straight into his lungs, and he distantly wonders how he can be standing on solid ground and still feel like he's drowning.
And he's tired. He's so, so tired to the point where it's almost suffocating.
It's only when he feels a gentle, familiar hand carding through his curls that he completely allows himself to break down.
“It’s okay, just let it all out. I've got you." says May's soothing voice.
And so, Peter lets himself cry. He lets his tears burst forth like water from a dam. He lets every part of his body tremble and let's himself curl his fingers around the back of May's coat and sob. He lets himself fall into the comfort of her embrace, hoping it'll somehow ground him. He just...lets it all happen, knowing that May would be there to catch him and help quiet the roaring voices inside his head.
He doesn’t know how long they stay on the bench, or how many people might've inevitably witnessed breakdown, all he knows is that May holds him through it all without a single complaint.
"Why didn't you tell me?" She asks as soon as his breaths have evened out and it isn't so hard to breathe anymore. Her words aren't accusing or angry, no, they just...sound sad.
Peter shrugs helplessly. "I didn't wanna worry you."
May makes a small noise of protest as she softly rubs her thumbs against his wet cheeks. "Honey, I'll always worry about you, it's my job."
"I know," He breathes, wiping desperately at his eyes himself. "I'm sorry for being such a mess lately…"
He feels May pulling him impossibly closer towards her chest. "Hey, hey..." She shushes him gently. "You don't need to apologize for that, it's okay. It's not your fault."
Peter's breath hitches once more as he shakes his head miserably. "I'm tired, May...I'm- I'm really, really tired." He croaks, his voice sounding clogged and scared.
"I know you are, sweetheart, I know…" She sighs deeply before pulling back so they're properly staring at each other, and that's when Peter catches the slight wobble in her lips. Stressed. She looks stressed. Peter's making her stressed. "But I need you to listen to me, okay?" She cups his cheeks with both of her hands, her touch both gentle yet firm at the same time. "I'll always be here for you, no matter what. Day or night, it doesn't matter, you can always count on me. Remember that, okay?" She says. Her eyes water as her fingers gently trace small circles against his blotchy cheeks, a tight lipped smile decorating her tired features.
Her breath wavers as she closes her eyes and presses their foreheads together. "We'll get through this together." There was a tenderness in her voice that almost has him bursting into another round of tears, a soft promise. "It's what we Parkers do best, right? Look after each other?" She says with a soft smile.
The strangled sound Peter made might've been a laugh or a sob. Either way, it makes May smile gently. "Yeah," He whispers, voice cracking as he ducks his head deep into the crook of her neck. "Love you, May…"
He feels May's smile widening when she presses a slow kiss on top of his head. "I love you, too, baby."
Later, when they're back at their apartment, May guides him towards the couch and lays him across her lap, one hand resting on his shoulder while the other carefully works through his mess of curls.
Then, May starts talking, slow and a bit cautious. "So, I was thinking…"
"Oh no…" Peter smiles playfully.
It earns him a gentle slap on the arm, which only makes his smile grow. May rolls her eyes, lips curling up just slightly. "I was thinking...what if we went to the lake house this weekend? You and Tony haven't seen each other in a while, it could be good for you."
Peter looks towards the wall and bites the inside of his cheek, then looks back at May. "I'd like that." He says with a tight lipped, teary smile.
May smiles. "Yeah?"
"Yeah," He says, smile widening.
"Great, I'll tell Happy in the morning, then." She says before clearing her throat. "And...maybe it could give you the chance to, you know, talk to Tony about a certain situation?" She suggests, not unkindly. "You don't have to, but just think about it, okay?" The glint in her eyes is hopeful, and Peter's always hated letting her down.
So, he nods. "Okay." He murmurs, burying deeper into her embrace. "Thank you." He whispers, for fear that his voice might crack if it's any louder.
May settles her hand on top of his. "You don't need to thank me, not for this."
Peter smiles warmly, hoping to pour all of his gratitude into just that smile alone. And he thinks he succeeded, if the loving tinkle in May's eyes is anything to go by. "I want to." He whispers earnesty.
~
Two days pass by and, truthfully, he doesn't remember much those two days, aside from spending more time with May than he normally does, which he is extremely grateful towards her for. And, additionally, he also doesn't remember much of the car ride towards the lake house either, seeing as one moment he's staring out the window of the car only to see buildings and traffic, and the next he's seeing trees and open fields.
A distant part of him thinks he should be worried about that, but that's not his biggest problem right now. No, his biggest problem right now is trying to find out a way to...talk to Tony about his adjustment, or rather, lack thereof. Not that he really wants to, just for May's sake. And maybe for his own peace of mind, too.
He ends up startling out of his apparent trance when Happy says, "We're here."
Peter blinks himself into reality and quickly scrambles to grab his backpack from where it's lying against his feet. He clears his throat and takes a deep breath, hoping to wash all of his remaining nerves, and pushes the door open with shaking fingers.
Almost immediately, a shrill voice he knows all too well calls out to him. "Peter!"
Peter whirls around and, sure enough, there comes Morgan barrelling towards him, Tony and Pepper behind her. He kneels down just in time to catch her, making a little noise of surprises as he does so. "Hey, Mongoose!" He laughs freely and cradles the back of her head as she wraps her arms tighter around his neck. “Geez, someone sure missed me.” He jokes, closing his eyes and he rocks them back and forth slightly.
Morgan pulls back just enough to pout at him, looking as offended as a five year old could look. "Well, duh, of course I did!"
Peter grins widely, warmth seeping into his bones. "Missed you, too, crazypants." He flicks her forehead fondly.
Morgan Stark was one of the most surprising changes and additions to this new life, a welcoming one, obviously, after all it was practically impossible not to adore her. But it was still shocking and different nonetheless.
Just as he was putting Morgan down, Tony speaks up. "What, no hug for your poor old mentor?" He says. Peter's smile widens as Tony spreads his arms wide. He jumps up from the ground as quick as he can and wraps his arms around Tony's shoulders.
Tony immediately reciprocates the action, wrapping his own arms tightly around Peter's back. "Missed you, kid." Tony says quietly, his voice slightly muffled by Peter's flannel.
Tony's open affection, yet another new thing. One which Peter was finding easier and easier to adjust to with each passing day, after getting over the initial surprise.
Peter tightens his arms around him. "I missed you, too, old man."
Tony scoffs, but otherwise pays the comment no mind. He pulls back and claps both his shoulders, offering him one last, wide smile before turning towards May and rubbing his hands together. "Aunt Panini, good to see you again!" He slings his prosthetic arm around her shoulders casually, a grin on his face.
May rolls her eyes with a fond shake of her head as she pats his back, sharing a look with Pepper. "Good to see you, too, Tony." She says.
Peter catches Pepper's eye and gives her a small wave. "Hey Pepper," He grins shyly.
Pepper leans forward to kiss his cheek. "Hi honey, how are you?" She asks after pulling back, keeping her hand on his shoulder lightly.
Peter shrugs sheepishly. "I'm okay. Just, y'know, getting by." He says.
He feels Morgan tug down on his sleeve and turns around to look down at her questioningly, Pepper's hand falling from his shoulder. "We got you ice cream!" She exclaims, a little more quietly than what he's used to.
Peter gasps dramatically. "You did?" He leans down to her height with a grin. "What flavor?" He asks in a stage whisper, eliciting a giggle from her.
"Mint chocolate chip." Morgan replies in the same tone, a hand cupped around her mouth as if the was sharing one of the world's deepest secrets.
"Yes!" He silently cheers, raising his hands to the air. Then, he offers a hand to her. "Well, then, come on! What are we waiting for?" She takes his hand happily and starts guiding them inside the house, half running, half walking.
"Hey- where are you two going?" Happy asks from behind them.
"Ice cream!" Morgan calls out over her shoulder excitedly, making no move to stop.
"Morgan, that was supposed to be a surprise." Pepper admonishes, though the fond quirk of her lips gives away that she's actually not annoyed.
"Sorry." Morgan giggles in a way that implies that she is very not sorry at all.
Tony rolls his eyes as he catches up to them. "Liar," He ruffles her hair before exhaling deeply. "Alright then, come on you heathens. Let's get ice cream." He says.
Morgan whoops excitedly before following Tony into the kitchen. "Yes!" She exclaims.
Peter watches them with a small smile on his face until Pepper comes up from behind him and carefully starts to take away his backpack. "I'll take this to your room, honey." She says.
Peter grabs the strap and pulls it closer to himself. "Oh no, that's okay, Pepper! I'll just take it later." He smiles at her politely, shoulders hunching slightly.
"Please, I insist." Pepper says, rolling her eyes gently while offering him a smile that leaves room for no argument.
"...Fine," Peter grumbles, taking his backpack off and giving it to her begrudgingly. She takes it with a satisfied nod and waves at May to follow her. "Thank you!" He calls out before they round the corner.
"So, Spidey, how's school going?" Tony asks from where here's now serving them both ice creams in the kitchen.
Peter shrugs even though he can't see him. "It's alright, same as always, I guess." He replies.
Tony hums in acknowledgment. "Hm...and your scary girlfriend? How's she doing?"
Peter feels his cheeks heat up furiously and palms the back of his neck. "Um, she's- she's good, yeah…" He bites the inside of his cheek to hide the smile that's threatening to show. He barely misses both the smug smirk Tony gives him in response and the amused look in Happy's eyes from where he's seated on the couch.
After a brief moment of silence, Peter licks his lips and clears his throat. "Hey, uh- Tony?" He calls out when he sits on the kitchen table.
Tony turns around to face him almost immediately. "Yeah?" He asks, eyebrows furrowed as if he's noticed his sudden change in tone.
Peter's mouth opens and closes several times before he shakes his head. Now's not the right time. "Uh- nothing, nevermind. Sorry." He says with a small smile.
Tony keeps watching him with that same concerned expression that never fails to make Peter's stomach churn until Morgan tugs at his sleeve. "Daddyyy, hurry up!" She says impatiently, practically vibrating with energy.
Tony shakes his head amusedly and chuckles. "Geez, okay. Hold your horses, little miss." Just as he says that, he hands Morgan two cones of ice cream, making her grin widely. "There, for you and Peter." He gives her a pointed look, so she doesn't think otherwise.
“Thank you!” Morgan chirps before going over to sit next to Peter, offering him the ice cream cone with poorly hidden excitement
"Thanks." Peter says, taking it from her hand gratefully. "So, Tony, Happy told me that you've been mopey over not being able to see me?" Peter asks teasingly, propping his chin up on his hand.
Tony scoffs, leaning on the kitchen aisle with crossed arms. "Okay, first of all, I do not mope-"
Happy snorts from the couch. "Sure."
Tony points at him with the ice cream scoop, eyes narrowed. "Shut up." He says before turning back to Peter. "And second, even if I did mope -which, again, I don't- I think I have all the right to do so, don't you think?"
Peter throws his hands up in surrender. "Hey, I wasn't mocking you or anything, I was just saying." He takes a bite of his ice cream with a grin.
"Oh, weren't you? Yeah, your tone said otherwise."
Morgan leans her body towards Peter. "What does mope mean?" She asks in a poor attempt of a whisper.
Peter leans in to whispering her ear, "It means he gets sad whenever he doesn't see me."
Morgan's mouth opens in a little 'o' shape. "Oh…" She says before blinking to herself, confusion shining in her eyes as she turns towards Tony. "Wait, but- Daddy, you do do that."
Peter looks at him and grins cheekily. "Told you."
Tony looks at Morgan with his mouth agape in mock betrayal. "I have never felt so betrayed. Just for that, neither of you are getting any more ice cream." He says, sniffling.
Morgan pouts. "Wait, no fair-"
"Don't worry, he won't actually do that. He loves us too much." Peter waves a dismissive hand, giving her a small grin. "So, tell me, how often does your dad mope exactly?" He asks without taking his eyes off Tony.
"All the time." Morgan pronounces each word slowly before sighing dramatically. "He's always telling Mommy about how much he misses you." She says, eyes sparkling with mischief.
Peter places a hand on his chest and coos. "Aww, Tony-"
"I've been betrayed in my own home. Can you believe this Hap? Wait, no- Don't answer that, I forgot. You're the reason this conversation is happening in the first place."
Happy throws his feet up on the coffee table and rolls his eyes. "You're so overdramatic." He says, shaking his head.
"I know, right?" Peter says, earning a warning glare from Tony.
Just then, May and Pepper walk back into the room. "What's going on here?" Pepper asks, sitting on the edge of the armrest.
"We're talking about how much Daddy's been moping." Morgan replies brightly, licking the edges of her ice cream cone.
"Morgan and Happy exposed me." Tony waves his finger at both of them, exasperation clear in his tone as he runs a hand through his goatee.
May rubs Tony's back in mock sympathy before sitting down next to Happy. "If it makes you feel any better, Peter's been pretty mopey, too." She grins, causing Tony to whip around and face him, looking more than slightly delighted.
Peter squawks in offense, heat rushing to his cheeks. "I have not-"
Tony shakes his head and laughs heartily. "Good to hear. Guess that makes us even, then." He says as he walks over to him, a smirk spreading across his lips, previous embarrassment forgotten. He reaches out to shake Peter's shoulder fondly. "It's okay, we're glad you're here now, too, kid."
~
It wasn’t until the sun was about to set, when Morgan had already turned in for her afternoon nap, that Peter was able to slip away from the commotion for a bit. It took a while, considering the fact that Morgan was a pretty big sleep cuddler and didn't seem to want to let go of his arm, but he managed to get away regardless.
Which brings him to where he is now, perched up on top of a particularly large tree, watching as the sky painted in hues of orange and yellow and a faint, soft pink slowly disappeared behind the horizon, making way for the depth of nighttime as the sun casts its last golden rays across the lake.
No one seemed to mind his sudden need to be alone, except for Tony, who regarded him with a curious quirk of his brow.
Which is why Peter isn't surprised when he hears the sound of approaching footsteps. Unlike May's, Tony's steps were steady and unabashed.
"Thought I'd find you here." Tony says, tucking his hands in the pockets of his jeans.
Peter rolls his eyes good-naturedly. "Please, it’s not like I made it that hard." He says.
"I'd beg to differ. Do you realize the amount of energy it takes for me to come out here?"
Peter bites back a smile. "So, what? You retire and now you're suddenly incompetent of walking a few steps? I knew you were old but wow-"
"Watch it, kid." Tony smirks at him, drawing a snicker out of Peter. Then, he leans back against the tree trunk and clears his throat, looking down as if he was contemplating something.
Peter tilts his head to the side and leans forward in an attempt to get a better look at his face. "What's wrong?" He asks.
Without looking up from the grass, Tony replies, "May said you had something you wanted to talk to me about?"
Well...shit. There goes his chances of bailing out.
Peter scoffs. "Traitor." He mutters as he picks at some dirt inside his nails.
Tony looks up to arch an eyebrow at him, the edges of his lips quirking up just slightly. "Well? Do you?" He asks.
Peter purses his lips and swings himself back and forth on the tree branch. He doesn't miss the way Tony steps just a little bit closer to where he's sitting, eyeing the tree warily. "Well- technically yeah, but it can wait until morning. It's not really a big deal, anyway."
"Hey, I get to decide if it's a big deal or not." Tony narrows his eyes. "And I'm here now, aren't I? So, why not just do it now?"
Peter looks over to the porch where May, Pepper and Happy are now sitting at. He catches May's eye and swallows down roughly when she gives him a smile and a thumbs up. Then, he looks back at Tony, his mouth suddenly feeling dry.
And Peter actually wants to tell him. He wants to tell him so badly. He wants to pour all his feelings out like how he did with May but- this is different, somehow. There's still that creeping feeling weighing him down, pushing in like a fist on his sternum. The same doubt that's been present for the past two days, the same doubt that's stubbornly refusing to leave.
Despite that, he still forces himself to push through anyways.
He needs this. He knows he does.
"Is it bad that I still don't feel completely…okay with all this?" Peter asks in a stupidly weak voice, swallowing hard. God, he can't believe he's actually doing this-
Tony straightens and tilts his chin up to look at Peter inquisitively. "What do you mean?"
Peter clicks his tongue. "I just mean that- um-" His grip on the branch loosens, and he drops down beside Tony with a sharp exhale. "I still don't...feel like I fit in completely, if that makes sense." He pauses to sit down, leaning heavily against the tree. "I mean...five years passed, everyone's already moved on, including you, and I just…" He bites his lip and clears his throat. "A lot of my old classmates are in college now, our apartment's not even the same anymore…and you- you have a kid now, which is like, insanely crazy-"
Tony cuts him off. "I have two, actually." He says, almost absentmindedly, like the words just spewed out of him automatically.
Peter furrows his eyebrows. "What?" He asks.
Tony huffs out a quiet laugh as he sits down beside him. "Morgan's not my only kid, Pete." He says, eyes impossibly gentle as he looks at Peter with such pure and undevoted love that he's immediately hit with the urge to just- jump into his arms and cry.
But instead of doing that, Peter just blinks dumbly at him, mouth gaping at the admission. "Oh," He breathes out, feeling more than a little stunned as his heart somersaults in his chest.
Tony chuckles and casually slings an arm around his shoulders, effectively pulling him closer. "Yeah, oh." He rolls his eyes in clear amusement. "You really didn't know?" He asks. Peter shakes his head and rubs the back of his neck sheepishly. "Well, then, you're a dumbass. May's right, for being so smart you can be painfully oblivious sometimes." He shoots him a smirk from the corner of his eye.
Peter frowns. "Hey-"
"But yeah, you're right, I did move on, eventually. I had to, if I wanted to raise Morgan properly. But there was always that...void, you know? Like something was missing and I couldn't be completely happy until I got it back." Tony says, voice rough.
"And you know what that thing was?" He asks, finally turning his head to look at Peter. "It was you." He says, voice almost unbearably soft as he pokes a finger right at his chest with a light smile. Then, he grimaces. "God, Pete, I was a mess after I got back. Just- a complete and utter trainwreck. I missed you like crazy. It was actually a little embarrassing." He admits with a small, humorless laugh before shaking his head and waving a dismissive hand in Peter's direction. "But, you don’t need to hear that. Point is, I never stopped missing you, kiddo. It was- living without you- it was torture." He gives him a tight-lipped smile, looking as old as someone who's fought a thousand wars, which Peter guesses that he has.
A beat. Then, "I'm sorry." Is all Peter can manage to say as he tries to ignore the rush of guilt that courses through his veins.
Tony holds up a stern finger in front of his nose. "Ah-ah! Stop. We don't do that here. Sorry, I don't accept stupid apologies." He gives Peter a stern look that leaves no room for argument before sighing. "What matters is that you're here now." He says, softer this time, before gingerly brushing a stray curl out of Peter's face. "You'll always have a place here, Pete. And...I appreciate you telling me, that must've taken a lot of guts." His voice is laced with a certain sincerity that makes Peter smile.
"And I appreciate you listening." He grins.
Tony shrugs as if it’s no big deal. When, really, it is. "It's the least I can do for my favorite spiderkid."
"I'm your only spiderkid."
“Thank god for that, I don't know how I could handle more than one of you."
Peter places a hand on his chest and snorts. "Rude." He pouts dramatically, opting for burying his face in Tony's shoulder to hide the smile that's slowly creeping up his lips. "But, yeah, thank you. That- it really means a lot to me."
"Yeah, yeah, don't mention it." Tony wraps his arms around his back and pulls him close. "God, I love you."
Peter feels a rush of warmth washing over his body and settling itself over him like a blanket. "Awesome." He grins into his shoulder.
Tony scoffs exasperatedly. "Seriously? I just poured my heart out to you and all you can say is awesome?" He pulls back just enough so they're looking at each other directly, and pulls Peter into a headlock, pining his arms to his sides.
Peter laughs, loud and free, and goes limp in Tony's embrace. "Yep," He grins up at him brightly, relishing in Tony's kind smile as he hides his face in his chest once again. It's that warm, gentle smile that makes his eyes crinkle at the edges, and the one that never fails to make Peter's insides feel all gooey. "Awesome."
May must've somehow sensed that the emotional talk was over, seeing as she walked up to them not even a minute later.
“Hey, you two. Hope I’m not interrupting anything.” She says, a hand on her hip as she smiles fondly.
Tony props his chin on top of Peter's head and tightens his grip just slightly. “Nah, you’re good. Pete and I were just having a little chat.” He winks at May, giving her a grin of his own.
“Is that so?” May’s eyes are shining with mirth as she looks over at Peter. She arches a brow at him as if to say ‘I told you so’ and he can't help but roll his eyes, a smile playing on his lips.
Peter wiggles his arm out of Tony’s grip and reaches out for May's hand. “You’re a traitor.” He says after tugging her down to the ground with them.
May swats his arm. “Oh, shush. You know I was right.”
Peter closes his eyes and settles back against Tony’s side with a contented sigh, his heart swelling with affection. “Yeah…” He whispers, softly squeezing May’s hand. “Love you guys.” He smiles gently, suddenly feeling lighter than he has in weeks.
“We love you, too, honey.”
And Peter...he feels at home. For the first time since he got back, he actually feels like he belongs somewhere. Here, surrounded by the two people he loves most in the world. So, with that thought in mind, he finally lets himself drift, letting himself be lulled by the safety and comfort of their embrace.