Work Text:
Tord stared at Tom in mute horror, the screwdriver that was in his hand dropping down onto the table with a clink.
"See you downstairs," Tom said, smirking, and threw the object in his hand onto Tord's bed, closing the door behind him.
Tord spent a good few seconds staring at the door, and finally got up from his worktable, brushing off the small screws and springs on his sweatshirt. Tom couldn't be serious. That fucker.
A few days ago, the fifth installment to Tord's favorite movie series, Insane Zombie Pirates from Hell, came out (and if you think that's overkill you should see Fast and Furious [joking calm down]), and he desperately wanted to see it. But he couldn't, because one, he had a sense of pride, and it didn't allow him to go into a movie theater alone, least someone thought he was a lonely person, and two, because he had just ordered some parts from the web, and was broke.
He has considered using his charm to ask Edd and Matt to bring him out to see the movie, but honestly he didn't want to be bothered. Perks of being lazy.
So he decided to wait unti the official CD came out.
Until Tom came into his room with a ludicrous offer.
Tord was perfectly fine working on one of his new inventions, a small, compact device that had a built-in shrink ray, able to shrink and store items the size of an average box inside. He was quite proud of it, and was working out a few problems here and there when some idiot banged their fist on his door.
Tord's focused expression immediately turned into one of annoyance, but he yelled "Come in!", his attention not deterred, still focusing on his project.
His door clicked open, and Tom was smiling sweetly at him from his doorway. He made no move to step inside, instead, he leaned his figure against the doorway, and when Tord looked up with a frown, could see– no, that wasn't possible...
Tom was holding a CD that had "Insane Zombie Pirates from Hell... the Fifth" printed on its cover.
His mouth dropped open, and he could hear a chuckle from Tom.
"There's a catch," Tord blurted, because he knew there was no way Tom would just– just GIVE him the CD like that. It was also probably a pirated one, judging by how the cover looked glued on and blurred. There was also the small fact that the official was supposed to come out a month later, and it had only been four days.
"No shit, Sherlock," Tom nodded, and tucked away the CD into confines of his hoodie. With a toothy grin, he pulled out a–
Dildo. Of course it was a dildo, what else would Tord have expected? Flowers? Chocolates? A fucking souvenir of the Eiffel Tower?
Then Tom flicked something on its base and the cursed object started vibrating. Yes, yes, of course it vibrates. That made Tord's life all the more easier.
"If you want to watch the movie, you're watching it with this in you. And it's going to be switched on. If not, no movie. You're also watching it downstairs with Edd and Matt."
And then Tord dropped his screwdriver, and Tom tossed the still vibrating dildo onto the bed.
And it brings us back to the present, where Tord was sighing as he dug around his drawers, searching for his lube. When he finally pulled the barely used bottle from under some sweatshirts (he didn't have to worry about lube when he and Tom fucked around; the latter usually took care of that little problem), his cheeks were tinted red at the—admittedly arousing—thought of casually sitting around with a sex toy in him.
Tord did have to admit that he could sort-of be blamed for bringing this onto himself, because recently he'd been teasing Tom in times where they could be easily caught, like giving his neck painful little nips at the back of Edd's car, or kneading the prominent bulge in his jeans at a restaurant.
What could he say? He just liked seeing Tom's red face.
All of that came crashing back down onto him as he flipped the cap of the bottle open to squeeze some out onto his palm.
Tord tossed the bottle back into his drawer and moved to his bed, giving the vibrator a disdainful look as he picked it up by its base and slathered its length generously with lube.
While he was doing that, he pulled down his pants and boxers with his other hand, kicking them off into a corner. He gave another sigh, but scrunched up his nose and pushed down his dignity as he pulled himself up onto the bed, and rested his chest against the cool sheets, raising his behind up as with a hand shaking from embarrassment, he pushed the tip of the dildo into himself.
Tord couldn't help letting out a moan, slowly working the thick shaft into him, his eyes watering a bit from the sting of doing this without stretching himself out first. But he really wanted to watch that movie, and didn't want to waste anymore time.
When he got to the base, he was panting softly, and let his lubed hand fall away from gripping the dildo. He took a few moments to collect himself, and knew there was no way he could last the entirety of the movie with this in him without coming. He could already feel the faint build, feel the dildo vibrate deliciously close to his prostate.
A shiver of pleasure passed through him, and he ignored the way his cheeks were colouring from the sheer absurdity of this idea. He didn't want to think about it- so he struggled a little as he slid off the bed, his toes curling inwards at the weird sensation of the dildo heavy in his gut.
He grabbed his clean towel and wiped off the excess lube, and glanced around his messy room once before deciding to shrug off his sweatshirt and grab his hoodie from the back of his chair, and also pull on some clean boxers and short pants.
Steeling himself for the incoming humiliation, he stepped out of his room, not bothering to close the door behind him as he made his way downstairs, having to clench down tight around the dildo least it slipped out or something.
When he reached the end of the steps, he saw Matt on the couch, Ringo purring on his chest as he ran his hands over her fur. The ginger had laid his head on the armrest, dangling his long legs over the other armrest, while Edd was somewhere in the kitchen, and Tord could here distinct popping noises. Tom was seated on the new sofa he (surprisingly) managed to harpoon right out of IKEA, and the only reason he wasn't in jail was because Eduardo and his gang were also stealing the sofas, and no one even noticed the harpoon that crashed through the window, stabbed into the back of the sofa and disappeared back through the window with the sofa in tow.
Although there was an unsightly puncture at the back, the sofa quickly became one of Tord's favorites to lie on while he was taking a break from his projects. He chose to ignore Tom's smirk whenever he was reading some Yuri manga on the sofa.
When Tom glanced up and saw Tord hesitating, biting down on his lips as his eyes darted to Matt with a frown, he cleared his throat and muttered something along the lines of "Edd-popcorn-butter", and Matt happily hopped off the couch, clutching Ringo as he skipped to the kitchen.
Tord made his way to Edd's usual seat, assuming that Edd would take the space next to Tom, but halted in his tracks when Tom "tsked" at him. "No no, you're sitting right here. Next to yours truly," Tom nodded at the space beside him, which had a couple of bunched-up blankets and pillows.
The blush rose to his face again as Tord knew exactly why those blankets were there. God, he'd be pushing laundry work to Tom after this.
Tord gingerly settled himself down as far away from Tom as he could; he didn't want to look at those infuriating eyes and that tantalizing grin that he knew he could wipe away with a quick kiss.
After a brief moment of heavy tension, he heard Matt squabbling with Edd as they came out of the kitchen. "Who just puts a lump of cold butter on their popcorn? Who does that?" Matt was huffing, glaring at Edd, who glared right back at him, snapping "I didn't even want butter on MY popcorn, so you'll have to fucking deal with it."
"But I bought that pack to share with everyone!" Matt exclaimed angrily, plopping his ass back down onto his seat with little grace, Ringo giving an indignant mew. "There is no 'share' in 'Family-sized-pack'," Edd retorted, taking his usual seat across from Matt with as much grace as Matt.
The two of them silently ignored each other, much to Tom and Tord's amusement. They might be the ones to have the most fights, but Edd and Matt topped them in squabbles. They could squabble all day long, for each was as stubborn as the other in their own way.
Tom leaned forward to pick up the remote from their glass coffee table, and started the movie, getting up from the sofa to quickly dim the lights. The sun was setting, and it casted an orange glow over their living room, and Tom grinned a little, pleased.
He knew Matt and Edd usually took a nap at this time, because Edd needed to start streaming later on in the night, and Matt went through his ridiculously long beauty cycle. If they fell asleep during the movie, he just might be able too...
"Tom! Hurry up, I don't have all night," Edd snapped impatiently from the couch. Tom bit down on his lip to hide his excited grin, and went back to the couch, settling down as the opening credits played.
About five minutes into the movie, he glanced over to Tord, who had his palms on the couch, helping to support his weight as he leaned forward ever so slightly to take the pressure off his behind. His face was stuck between delight and amusement of the bad CGI of the movie, and also between a slightly annoyed one, shifting every now and then.
Shifting slightly closer to Tord, he rested an arm on Tord's shoulder, forcefully pushing him down. Tord glanced sharply towards Tom, but let his arms relax and fold themselves over his stomach. In this position, the tip of the dildo was vibrating right against his prostate, and Tord again had to clamp his mouth shut to avoid any sounds.
He tried to enjoy how ridiculous this scene was, the zombies beamed down from a flying undead pirate ship onto a coffee shop in diving suits, ready to start a whole apocalypse, but when Tom pulled a blanket free from the bottom off all those pillows and draped it over himself and Tord's lap, his mind strayed to how Tom's hand, under the protection of the blankets, was creeping over to his bulge.
Tord's eyes darted to both Matt and Edd, but they seemed to be more focused on angrily keeping their eyes on the screen in a pathetic attempt to ignore the other, so he just went back to the movie while silently hoping that Tom didn't stimulate him too much.
Meanwhile, Tom just smiled as he started kneading Tord's tent, tracing the outlines of Tord's cock and paying special attention to the head. Tord was reacting in the exact way Tom hoped he would, mouth falling open in a quiet ttle pant, slightly bucking his hips upwards into the touch.
Tom didn't even mind if Tord let out any stray sounds. Edd was munching angrily on his buttered popcorn, and the movie was just a little too loud, so Tom gave Tord's cock a gentle squeeze through his pants, chuckling a little as he saw the precum leaving a wet spot on them.
"No, Miranda getting abducted right after Andrew resurrected her isn't funny, Tom," Matt growled, turning to glare at Tom over his shoulder uncomfortably. Tord jolted, before remembering the blanket draped over him, but it didn't help his nerves as he saw Matt giving him a weird look.
But eventually the ginger turned his attention back to the movie, and Tom once again resumed his stroking, this time with much more vigor, and renewed courage to partly pull down Tord's pants and boxers.
In the back his mind, Tord was vaguely keeping track of what little plot the movie had, like how Miranda was currently having an affair with one of the zombies, but he was mostly focused on trying not to cum. Tom was skilled, and Tord never knew how Tom could find his sweet spots so quickly. When did Tom get so good at handjobs?
Tom slid his thumb over the head of Tord's cock, gathering his pre and spreading it over the head in small circles. He smiled at Tord's trembling thighs, and then wrapped his hand around Tord's cock, giving it a few slow pumps.
Tord closed his eyes, his entire body tense. Tom's hand was so warm around him, and his calloused fingers felt so good, the rough texture bringing him so much faster to the edge.
Tom halted his strokes, idly rubbing Tord's cock between his fingers, and waited for a particularly gore-y scream-y scene before he pumped at Tord's flushed cock like his life depended on it.
The harsh pumps, coupled with the warmth of Tom's palm and the sensation of the vibrator still buzzing inside him had Tord coming over Tom's fist with a soft gasp, and then his body was slumping against the sofa, panting.
Edd and Matt seemed blissfully oblivious, and Tord gave Tom look that Tom assumed was supposed to be scary, but ended up looking adorable, what with his blush and the afterglow of his orgasm.
And then Tom just left Tord like that for a good half of the movie.
Now Tord knew how Tom felt when he'd blueball him in the middle of something.
The vibrator was building another orgasm, yes, but it was slow and painful, without any stimulation to his cock. Tom was just sitting there, smirking, and Tord didn't want to move his own hands to jerk himself off, that'd just risk Edd or Matt looking over at them.
However...
The ginger's eyes were closed, and Ringo was purring contently on his gut, lulling him into unconscious. Edd's head also kept nodding, and he would jerk awake when his head would touch his chest. Tord had a feeling none of them would notice if he just... shifted his hands a little...
Suddenly, Tom was holding both his wrists in one hand, refusing to let him move.
Tord's thighs were trembling, and he forced himself not to try and bounce on the dildo, though any kind of stimulation felt amazing to him right now. He couldn't help grinding a little, eyes avoiding Tom as his hips moved in little circles to try and help him get off.
He shivered when he felt Tom lean towards him, his hot breath tickling his ear. It took Tord a few moments to realize that Tom was actually speaking, and another few seconds to rewimd back and try to remember what the words were.
Oh. "If you move again I'll fuck your brains out," he had said.
So that's exactly what Tord did.
He rolled his hips in a full circle, body trembling as the vibrator brushed against every sweet spot he swore he had. But what wouldn't he give to feel a real cock in him.
He let his gaze drift to Tom, and felt a smirk tugging at his lips as he himself leaned over to mutter into the dark skin of Tom's neck. "Go ahead and do it, then. Don't think you'd dare to, with Edd and Matt here."
Tord barely managed to clamp his mouth shut as Tom suddenly stood up, whisking Tord by the waist with him. Tord hung onto Tom's shorter frame, wrapping his arms around Tom's neck and hooking his legs around Tom's waist. "You were saying?" Tom growled, softly, as both their gazes quickly went to their friend's sleeping forms before fixing on each other again.
And then Tom's lips were smashing into Tord's, and both were struggling for dominance, the kiss immediately turning into an open-mouth clash. Tom was moving, bringing him somewhere, the rational part of Tord's brain informed him, before it blinked away to make way for the part that was screaming "SEX SEX SEX".
Tord felt his ass meeting with the cold marble of their kitchen counter, and he let a sigh tumble out of his swollen lips, moaning freely as Tom broke their kiss and reached down to tug the vibrator out of his ass. It was tossed behind him without a second thought, the first being to get his dick into Tord as fast as possible, because he was so painfully hard and Tord looked so good spread out before him like that with that lookonhisfuckingface–
Tord braced himself, pulling Tom closer to him as his sweaty hands spread his ass cheeks, and attempting to line his cock with Tord's messy hole, but only succeeded in pressing it against Tord's own cock.
"Asshole- stop teasing," Tord growled, and it was only then that he noticed how dark the kitchen was, and decided to give Tom a hand, guiding his cock to the right position.
Without any further words, Tom griped the edges of the counter and slammed into Tord, burying his face into Tord's fair neck. It was a hard and rough pace, and neither lasted long as both were edged beyond the point.
Tord just let Tom fuck him, his rough pace destroying his tailbone, but he could care less as he felt himself tightening. Tom paused a moment to take a hand off the countertop and give Tord a few half-hearted jerks, but it was all he needed as he came with a cry onto Tom's hoodie.
With a few more wild bucks Tom was coming too, riding out his orgasm with slower, more gentle thrusts. They both panted, Tom coming to a stop, sweat dripping from their foreheads, and for a moment Tord considered giving Tom a kiss; the side of his cheek looked so good with stubble...
And then Tom was pulling back, his cock slipping out with a lewd sound, and already a pool of cum was dripping onto the marble countertop. "They're awake," was all he said as he practically sprinted out of the kitchen and up the stairs, leaving Tord all alone and glaring at his back.
Sure enough, Tord had a lot to explain to Edd, including why there was a discarded vibrator that was STILL buzzing on the kitchen floor, and also promising that he'd clean and sanitize the entire kitchen.
The next time they were in the car or a restaurant, Tord wouldn't be having any mercy.