Chapter Text
Karkat was hot because it was summer in Texas, and everything is hot by then. He sat next to Dave in the empty car lot of his Dads' restaurant, waiting for said father to go on break so he could give them a ride, but either he forgot or his schedule changed because they'd sat there for an hour yet the world remained utterly still. It would have been a simple matter, getting up. But they were too hot (temperature-wise) to move, or at least Dave was, and Karkat was too hot (not temperature-wise) for the suggestion to cross his mind anyways.
Using what little shade was offered by the tall, rough tree they were half-leaned against, Dave busily pre-occupied himself, trying to pretend he wasn't glancing in the other boys' direction every minute or so. It was hard to believe the guy had lived in Texas for the past ten years, considering he still couldn't handle the heat, but then again, it was unseasonably warm. From his side of the bark, Karkats' brows pushed together, beginning to type away at his phone.
carcinoGeneticist [CG] began pestering turntechGodhead [TG]
CG: I DON'T THINK HE'S COMING
TG: doesn't look like it.
TG: also just out of curiosity why are we texting when were like two feet away
Karkat shuffled, grunting as he continued to busily type.
CG: TALKING TO YOU "IN REAL LIFE" TAKES COPIOUS AMOUNTS OF ENERGY *NORMALLY*.
CG: LET ALONE WHEN THE ENTIRE STATE IS LITERALLY ON FIRE.
TG: fair enough
TG: i cant really blame the earth for trying to wreck our shit but its a personal preference of mine to die next to an AC
TG: should we grab your dad?
CG: NOT WORTH IT.
CG: I DOUBT IT WAS AN ACTIVE DECISION ON HIS PART, LEAVING US TO DIE AND ALL
CG: BUT BOTHERING HIM WON'T GET US ANYWHERE CONSIDERING HIS BREAK IS LONG OVER BY NOW
TG: goddamn it
TG: we should at least go inside
CG: BE MY GUEST
CG: BUT I GUARANTEE THE AIR CONDITIONING IS STILL FUCKED
CG: *AND* IT SMELLS LIKE FISH
TG: fuck.
TG: so whaddo we do then?
TG: just sit here like dogs locked in a hot sedan until your dad gets off work in the next like
TG: six hours?
CG: SEVEN.
CG: BUT UNLESS YOU HAVE A BETTER PLAN, I GUESS?
TG: you think having a stroke is a good excuse for not doing my bio homework?
CG: FUCK NO.
CG: SHITS SO COMMON YOU'D BE BETTER OFF TELLING HER YOUR BROTHER ATE IT AGAIN
TG: first of all he didn't eat it he pissed on it, so jot that down
CG: THAT DOES NOT HELP AT ALL.
TG: second of all isnt your house like two blocks from here?
TG: which is around a mile counting for inflation but still
TG: our odds are probably better trying to walk the distance than they are staying here
TG: where i'm assuming wed spend the next six hours waiting to start sweating blood
TG: which is i guess as good of an outcome as any? maybe hematohidrosis would make for a better doctors note
TG: check it mrs. maryam, oh yeah ive been out for like a week no biggie
TG: where you ask? well me and my number one bro had to visit the ER after we sat on our asses so long the blood-sweat kicked in
CG: I'M PRETTY FUCKING SURE THAT ISN'T HOW HEMATOHIDROSIS WORKS
TG: probably not
TG: but the point still stands
CG: MY HOUSE IS CLOSER TO A MILE AWAY, WHICH MEANS IT'D BE EASIER TO SWIM ACROSS THE ATLANTIC OCEAN
CG: MAYBE POP ON OVER TO VENEZUELA FOR A SUMMER TRIP LIKE TWO SUBURBAN DADS
TG: we cant make the kids swim bro
TG: little timmy keeps popping his floaties
CG: FUCK HIM
CG: WE MIGHT LOSE A FEW ON THE WAY
TG: he is like six
TG: fucker needs to be more independent
CG: EXACTLY
CG: ALTHOUGH WE MIGHT NEED HIM TO BYPASS BORDER CONTROL
TG: why
CG: HUMAN SHIELD
TG: weve got like sixty eight more we can spare timmys lazy ass
CG: BUT HOW ARE WE GONNA AFFORD A HOTEL?
TG: who said anything about a hotel?
TG: sorry babe were roughing it tonight
TG: gonna get lost in a colombian forest
TG: fake our deaths. maybe go off the grid.
CG: WOULDN'T FAKING OUR DEATHS KIND OF FORCE THE WHOLE "OFF THE GRID" THING?
CG: ALSO I THOUGHT WE WERE GOING TO VENEZUELA
TG: aren't they the same place?
CG: NO.
CG: ANYWAYS, I'M PRETTY SURE YOUR APARTMENT IS CLOSER.
CG: IT'S ON WHAT, LAFAYETTE?
CG: WHICH MEANS WE'D HAVE TO WALK DOWN S. PEARL, CROSS MAIN, AND IT SHOULD BE RIGHT THERE.
CG: SO IT'S WAY LESS THAN A MILE AWAY.
TG: not happening
TG: playdates are a strict no-no
CG: PLAYDATES??
CG: YOU'RE PRACTICALLY A GROWN ASS MAN, AND SO AM I
TG: im not exactly paying rent, man
TG: besides crossing main at this time of day is pretty much a death sentence
CG: 1.) WHY THE FUCK SHOULD YOU BE?
CG: 2.) YOU...HAVE A POINT.
TG: so we're back at square one
CG: LOOKS THAT WAY.
TG: cuba is still looking pretty good from here
CG: COLOMBIA.
TG: whatever
TG: you okay man you sound pretty fucking wack
CG: IM FINE.
CG: HOT, BUT FINE.
TG: obviously.
TG: but how are you temperature wise?
CG: SHUT UP, JACKASS.
Karkat waited for a response, labored breath growing more shallow as he considered having made Dave angry. When none came, he rallied himself to stand up, crossing the two-foot threshold between them and finding Dave typing the same message half-a-dozen different ways, each time deleting it half-way through completion.
"DO YOU STILL WANNA HEAD TO MY HOUSE?"
Dave didn't startle, aware of Karkats' movement the moment it began. Cocking his head to the left, he looked disappointed,
"damn is venezuela really off the table?"
Karkats' face cracked into a half-smile, which filled Daves' chest with just enough pride that he only hesitated for a second when Karkat offered his hand,
"LETS NOT RULE ANYTHING OUT."