Chapter Text
Sonny walked out of the bar, his arm looped around a girl he’d met that night. She giggled as they both swayed towards the Uber waiting in the street. Sonny wasn’t sure what her name was; he wasn’t sure that he even asked. He felt bad for a moment, and then felt better when he reasoned that she didn’t know his either. It was just supposed to be fun; something to take both their minds off the real world.
“Where do you live?” She asked, preparing to punch his address in her phone. A car door shut behind him and Sonny smiled at his date. “Where do you want me to live, sugar?”
Sonny heard laughter and the sound of two people, definitely on a date. The cadence of one voice was very familiar.
“Do you want to put it in?” She asked, cocking her head at him inquisitively. The voices behind him got louder and he heard a woman laugh and say, “No, I swear it’s true!”
‘Lisa’, Sonny thought, telling himself not to turn around immediately. He heard Lisa laugh again and a deep male voice say, “You’re pulling my leg. No way that happened.” The voices got closer as they approached the bar that Sonny and his new friend had just exited. Sonny felt like his heart was in his stomach.
“No, really. You can ask - … Sonny?” Lisa’s voice grew louder and stopped just short of Sonny’s back, signaling that he could definitely not ignore Lisa on this date, as much as he wanted to.
He turned around and held up a hand in a half hearted attempt at a wave.
“Davis.. Didn’t know you were coming here tonight.” His date looked at Lisa curiously and then back to him, waiting for an introduction. Lisa gave a strained smile and put out her hand to the girl, saying “Hi I’m Lisa. Sonny and I work together.” The girl smiled and shook her hand enthusiastically. “Hi! I’m Allie. We just met.” Lisa cocked one judgmental eyebrow at Sonny and he looked away, adjusting his hat.
An awkward moment passed. “And I’m James.” Davis jerked to attention and laughed self consciously, placing an arm on his in apology. “I’m so sorry - I’m terrible at introductions. Sonny, this is James.”
James stuck his hand out for Sonny to shake and Sonny fought the urge to swat it away like a child. Instead, Sonny grasped it tightly, taking some satisfaction when James’ eyes widened at his grip.
“So you’re in the Navy with Lisa? Very cool, man. Thank you for all you do.” James said, smiling at Lisa. Sonny was annoyed by how nice this man was. Where did she meet this guy, anyway? She worked 24/7 - how did she have the time? He nodded in acknowledgement to James and turned his gaze back to Lisa. Lisa continued to study Sonny’s date, reminding him that he was not alone.
He put an arm around Allie’s shoulder and she looked at him peculiarly, as if saying “Couldn’t you not remember my name two minutes ago?”
“Well we better be on our way. Allie and I were heading out.” Lisa broke her awkward stare and nodded, waving at them as James said, “Nice to meet you both.” He and Lisa turned towards the bar and began to walk away, Lisa turning back one time to glance at them both.
“So that’s the girl, huh?” Allie said, a strangely knowing look in her eyes. Sonny let his arm drop and looked to the ground as he scuffed his shoe back and forth.
“Don’t know what you mean, darlin’.”
Allie touched his arm lightly and said, “Hey, I may be tipsy as hell but I’m not blind. You’re in love with her and she’s in love with you but you can’t be together. It’s written all over your face.”
Sonny looked up, stunned that it was so obvious to a complete stranger about their predicament.
“Yeah, I know. Who know the flirty blonde was actually insightful?” She teased.
Sonny chuckled and said, “I don’t know. We make sense together, but can’t be together in this lifetime. So we’re doing our best to move on.”
Sonny was startled as he said these words - more than he had divulged to any friend - to a complete stranger. But that was why he could; he knew he would never see her again. His heart felt heavy tonight and he suddenly was no longer in the mood for mindless fun with someone who wasn’t Lisa. He looked up and said, “Hey, listen Allie - it’s been fun and I don’t want you to take this the wrong way -“ Sonny stopped as he realized she wasn’t paying him any attention.
“Allie?”
Allie looked up from her phone and smiled and then and looked back down, continuing to dial a number in her phone.
“Oh yeah, sorry Sonny. No hard feelings. I knew this wasn’t going to happen once all that went down back there.” She looked up again and smiled brightly, no sign of animosity in her eyes at all. She turned her attention back to the ringing phone in her hand and said into the speaker, “Hey… Yeah I know I said we wouldn’t, but could you - okay, thank you. The Burrow on 2nd. See you soon.”
Sonny cocked his head curiously at the call she had made and she sighed. “I have a Lisa too - but his name is Andy. We can’t stay away from each other. He probably had plans but I’m selfish enough to call him for a ride and he’s stupid enough to listen to me. He’s my ride or die - and I happen to be in love with him.”
Sonny was shocked that he wasn’t upset that a girl he had considered sleeping with 20 minutes ago was now going home with another man and it had happened in a span of 15 seconds. In fact, he felt relieved. Sometimes it was exhausting faking emotions and pretending to have with another woman what he wished he still had with Lisa.
He stuck out his hand and shook hers with much less pressure than he used on James.
“Nice to meet you Allie. I wish you luck. Better luck than mine.”
She tilted her head and said, “You’re luckier than you think, Sonny. You’ve found someone that makes you feel this way and most people never do. Sometimes you can’t stay away because you’re just not meant to.”
Sonny whistled and chuckled at how true the words were. “Well damn Allie. If you’re this wise after four shots, I can’t imagine what you’re like sober.”
She threw her head back and laughed. “It’s funny because I’m almost a therapist. I graduate next week.”
Sonny fake grabbed his heart and stumbled backwards. “I almost went home with a shrink? Damn!”
She laughed and said, “Yeah, we stood no chance.” She waved to someone behind Sonny and he turned around to see a black SUV pull into the bar parking lot. Allie used two fingers to salute as she smiled at Sonny, starting to head towards the passengers seat of the car. A man in a ball cap met her at her door, opening it before turning to Sonny. Sonny nodded once and turned to walk away before Allie’s voice stopped him once more, “Don’t let her go home with James - betcha she’s waitin’ for you right now.” Andy closed the door behind and called to Sonny, “She’s usually right, man. It’s a pain in the ass.”
Andy returned to the front seat and they drove away, Allie waving from the passenger seat.
Well, now Sonny had two options. He could call an Uber and go home or he could go back in the bar. Neither option sounded good to him. On one hand, he would be going home to an empty apartment and all he would be thinking about was Lisa on her date.. Lisa leaving with her date.. Lisa going home with her date..
Sonny shook his head, attempting to get the picture of his mind. “Damnit Quinn, get it together.” He mumbled, taking his hat off and running a hand through his hair before putting it back on.
The other option meant that he would go back into the bar and give Lisa the satisfaction of knowing that Sonny was now alone and that he’d run off his date. That would be a blow to his ego for sure.. but hey, he’d just been ditched by a girl five minutes ago for her ex boyfriend so his night couldn’t get much more humiliating.
Sonny sat on a bench in front of the bar and pulled out his phone, scrolling through his past text messages, attempting to look busy while he decided what he wanted to do.
If he did go in the bar and Lisa did ditch her date (very low odds on this one, she was far too polite), where would that leave them? His apartment? Another one night stand that felt wonderful at the time, but would leave them both with their hearts ripped out in the morning? How was that better than going home now and wallowing alone?
The door beside him opened and a few more people filtered out, some heading towards taxis and some heading towards their cars - but none alone.
Sonny could call one of the boys to come paint the town with him - but he wasn’t even feeling up to that. Sonny felt like the sorriest sack of shit ever - he didn’t even want to be around himself right now, let alone subject an innocent person to the shit show he called his life.
The door opened again beside him and Sonny watched as James left the bar without Lisa.
“What the hell?” Sonny muttered, watching as James stood five feet in front of him, seemingly calling a ride home.
James answered his phone on the first ring and said, “Yeah, this is James. It’s hard to get to - I don’t know the name of the bar. It’s called The Donkey? No, that’s not right. The Churro? No..”
“The Burrow.” Sonny piped in before he realized what he was doing. James turned around immediately, and seeing Sonny, turned back around. “It’s called the Burrow. Yeah the one on 2nd. Okay, thanks.”
“No one ever knows how to get here.” Sonny said, trying to clear the awkwardness. James stood facing the other direction for a beat and then turned around.
“That was my Uber. It’ll be here shortly.” James’ friendly tone from earlier was now colder and Sonny raised his eyebrow.
“You’re leaving a fine lady in a bar by herself on a Friday night. Hope you’ve got a good reason.” Sonny said, his voice remaining mild. He wasn’t sure why he felt like provoking this guy; afterall, his insides were doing gleeful flips because James and Lisa wouldn’t be taking their date any further.
James laughed once and looked down at the ground, putting his hands in his pockets before looking back at Sonny.
“Man, you’re clueless aren’t you?” Sonny felt his heckles rise and he resisted standing up immediately so he could stand eye to eye with this guy. He decided to remain cool; Lisa would murder him if he made a scene with her date.
“Yeah, how so?” He growled, staring intently at James. To James credit, he did not waver under his stare which he had seen happen more times than he could count.
James’ angry eyes widened and his expression became one of incredulousness. Looking at the road and then back at Sonny, he walked closer and crossed his arms.
“Sonny, this is my third month dating Lisa. I am falling for her, fast. She is funny, she is smart, and she is drop dead gorgeous.”
Sonny held up his hand, stopping James from continuing to twist the knife in further. “Listen cowboy, none of this is news to me. I’m aware.” Also, three months?! How had he not known?
James laughed once and continued, “I’m not sure you are. Because if you were, it would be you on that date and not me.”
Sonny looked away and clasped his hands together, saying “I’ll stop you right there. Lisa and I are just friends. Been that way for years.”
“Yeah, I’m no jackass Sonny. I can see how she looks at you and you at her. You think I didn’t notice the way she was staring daggers at your date? Or how closed down she became once we were inside? She became a different person.”
Sonny looked down and then stood up, fixing his hat before coming face to face with James. He looked around, happy to see it was still just them.
“Listen James, your observations are actually accusations. We work together and if someone got word of what you’re implying, our careers would be over.”
James softened. “Sonny, I have no intention of burning your lives down. I actually care for Lisa. I think I could love her. But she has this ghost following her around and keeping her from moving on. I realized that fully tonight after meeting you.”
He didn’t blame James for falling for Lisa. He actually wondered frequently why every man Lisa met didn’t puddle at her feet. A car pulled into the parking lot and James waved at his driver before turning back to Sonny.
“All I’m saying is that whatever you guys have going on is ruining both of your lives. You need to figure out how to let eachother go before you’re both permanently alone.” James let his statement sink in for a few seconds and then turned on his heel and walked towards the car.
He turned around once more and said, “But Sonny listen, I’m not giving up until she calls it. I’m hoping she decides to go all in with me. Man to man, I wanted you to know.”
“Good way to show that, hoss - leaving your girl in the bar.” Sonny called before he could help himself, his heckles raised.
James opened the door and said over his shoulder, “We both know that she’s not my girl, man. But I’m hoping she will be.”
James got in his car and drove away and Sonny hoped it was the last time he would see him.
“Damnit.” He said, flexing his hands. He desperately wanted to hit something. He was fully aware that James had been 100% correct, and it made him hate the smug bastard even more.
Sonny looked towards the door of the bar. Lisa was in there, alone, probably upset. All of his instincts said to go in and see her. But was James right? Did he need to let her go; give her the clean break she deserved? She was obviously hurting the same way he was. He hadn’t realized - he’d assumed she had moved on already.
He’d had a feeling after she was arrested that she was still shaken from their breakup, but she had rebounded after that with such enthusiasm about the job and outwardly appeared fine. Sonny had continued to try and get over her the best way he knew how - avoid and conquer. But he was now realizing that he was selfishly ignoring the root of the problem - the lack of closure. Afterall, both Sonny and Lisa's nights had abruptly ended due to their inability to move on.
He still loved her, that was not up for debate. In fact, his love for her may have even grown. Sonny looked towards the door and then back to his phone, trying to decide what to do. Looking up, he decided to do the one thing he could live with. He began to move forward.