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How To Be A Royal 101

Summary:

He prepared his whole life to protect the crown, but never did he picture himself as someone who wore the crown. It's a good thing a neighboring Queen can and is willing to give some helpful advice.

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Sitting alone in his room, surround by piles upon piles upon piles of paperwork filled with addendum and laws, Graham sat hunched over at his desk with his brows furrowed in absolute frustration, flicking the end of the quill against his chin. He had admittedly lost track of time doing all this busy paper work, but the massive cramp in his spine was enough to indicate to him that it has been just a wee bit too long for his liking.

Plus, he could have sworn the words had started to swirl and squiggle away into nothing but a blurred mess.

He rubbed his eyes, hoping it was just his eyes playing tricks on him. And for only a brief moment, the words looked normal... except they looked to have been repeating itself.

His head was hurting.

“GAH!!” Graham flung his arms up into the air, knocking over a few sheets of paper into the air before digging his hands into his curly brown locks, rubbing furiously as if to spark his brain back up.

“Is everything alright, Sire?” One of the knights asked from behind the door.

He leaned back in his chair, arms draped to the floor in defeat as he stared at the ceiling. “Fine. I’m fine.” Graham answered dejectedly before sighing. “Just... tried.”

The king heard the door creak open and paid no mind to the knight who looked into the room, biting his inner cheek when he heard that small ‘ooh’ sound. He respected the knights of Daventry, really. But he was half tempted to chuck his boot at them for that ‘ooh’ sound. He hated that ‘ooh’ sound. 

“Want me to get Royal Guard Number Two to make you hot chocolate?” The knight offered.

Graham’s rage subsided just slightly and he gave a small nod. “Yes, please.” He heard the small ‘Right’ from the knight followed by the sounds of their metallic boots clacking away in the hallway and placed his hands over his eyes and gave it a small rub, getting lost in his thoughts.

He was beyond honored to be next in line. He loved Daventry and its people with everything that he was and has. But he was never prepared to be its king. He trained almost his whole life to protect the crown, not eventually wear the crown, and one glance at the swirling mess of supposed words on the various papers scattered on his desk was enough proof to him that he just... didn’t get it. All these laws, and addendum and requests, it was just overwhelming and he had no idea how to get out of its choppy seas.

Maybe he should’ve taken up Guybrush’s offer at being a pirate. Pirates have no laws, last he was told. Just guidelines.

It was then when his eyes shot open, wide and with clarity as an idea struck him like a bolt of lightening. Pushing aside the various rules, Graham pulled out an empty parchment and dipped the tip of the quill into the small bottle of ink, smirking as he began to scribble down quickly a letter.

He knew exactly who to get in touch with.

~~~~

Graham sat in the Throne Room, rubbing his forehead. After a full day of talking with the locals and hearing what has been ailing them, he was admittedly just a bit drained. He only had just those few precious minutes in-between to catch his breath before the next meeting. And with a wave, he permitted Royal Guard Number Three to let the next person in.

“May I present...” Royal Guard Number Three begun.Graham readjusted himself and looked ahead when his somewhat stoic facade melted and the smile took over.

“...Her Majesty the Queen, Zelda of Hyrule and Sir Link.” 

Graham, out of both respect and excitement, stood up as Zelda in her royal garb made her way over to him, following close to her side Link. The two of them holding themselves perfectly well, but the look in their eyes was enough indication that they were beyond happy to see the king as well.

The two Hylians gave a bow to Graham who, in the heat of the moment, just gave a wave and forgot all forms of manners, catching a small smirk off of the two who were suppressing a giggle before they stood back up. With formalities out of the way, Graham got down from the Throne stand and quickly walked over to the two.

“I’m...” Graham cleared his throat, putting on that faux royal tone. “Thank you for answering my request. Though it is a pleasure and an honor to have you in my court, Your Majesty.”

Zelda smiled and stuck her hand out for Graham to shake. “The pleasure is all mine, Your Majesty.” She retreated her hand and pulled out a familiar parchment, the Daventry seal having been broken. “Shall we speak in a private room?”

~~~~

The doors to Graham’s room shut close and Graham let out a sigh of relief as he rolled his shoulders. “How’d you do this all day? Sitting in a chair and just talking non-stop?” He asked, looking over at Zelda who had long since claimed one of the comfy seats and changed out of her more formal attires to her casual one, slouched just a bit, making his way to sit in the adjacent chair. She shrugged.

“Practice, for the most part.” She admitted. “Though, in my defense, I was schooled how to do it. You though... not so much. You’re very stiff.”

Graham winced. “Is it obvious I’m new to this?”

Zelda pinched her fingers. “A bit.”

He groaned and slouched, covering his face in embarrassment as Zelda snickered.

“It’s alright. The first few years are usually the most awkward.” She reassured. “Word of advice though? Better seat cushions. Makes the throne less stiff and painful and you more comfortable and when you’re comfortable, you’re relax. Which, as mentioned earlier, you’re not.”

“Should I be writing this down?”

“If you want. Just offering my two rupees.”

He contemplated for a moment and pulled out a notebook, quickly scribbling it down when there was a knock on the door. “Permission to come in?” A voice called through. The two quickly stood up straight, almost on instinct, but neither said anything. Zelda just stared at Graham who looked to have been waiting for her to give permission.

“Well?”

“Huh?”

“I’m the guest, You’re the host.” Zelda pointed out.

“I... OH!” Graham cleared once again his throat. “P-permitted!”

Zelda covered her face in second-hand embarrassment.

The two heard a muffled ‘permitted’ when the door clicked open. Link walked in with a perplexed look on his face as he carried a tray with some snacks and a few drinks. “Who says ‘permitted’? It’s ‘proceed’ or ‘you may’, Graham.” Link mocked as he closed the door behind him. He looked at the scene and then to Zelda. 

“See? Even Link knows, and he’s not even king.” Zelda jabbed.

Graham’s ears burned with embarrassment as Link placed the tray down, grabbing a nearby chair and taking a seat between the two of them before taking a cookie to munch on and patting Graham’s arm sympathetically.

“Hey.” She spoke up again, causing the king to look at her. “It’s alright. Everyone starts somewhere, whether it’s royalty or just a local bakery. Just take deep breaths.”

He nodded and took in a few breaths, finally relaxing just a little.

“By the way,” Graham looked to Link, “Have you heard from Guybrush?”

“I did.” Link nodded. “He’s out somewhere in the East? Said he’ll come visit with souvenirs for us and a new trick.”

“Oh boy.” Graham chuckled   

“So! Let’s get down to business.” Zelda said, clasping her hands together and taking out the letter. “What’s this about needing some input about an addendum?”

“Well...” Graham scratched his cheek. “I just... I don’t know how to go about it without going cross-eyed. It’s a lot of rules and half the time I just... I don’t get it.”

“What’s not to get?” She asked. “You must’ve seen Daventry during King Edward’s reign. So you should have an idea of what could make the kingdom better.”

“But that’s the thing. I don’t. At least... not entirely.” He admitted. “I came near the end of his reign and more then that, I’m not from Daventry-Daventry.”

Zelda raised a brow.

“I’m from the outskirts, more of the farmlands then anything. So I don’t really have family that has an affiliates with the kingdom of Daventry.” He explained.

“Oooh, okay.” Zelda nodded understandingly. “So an implant.”

Graham chuckled. “Yeah, that sounds about right.”

The Queen smiled and shifted herself slightly. “Still, you must’ve seen Daventry during your time as knight, you no doubt have heard from the people based on how many of the locals Link and I saw when we came in, so you must have just a little inclination about it.”

“I suppose, yeah.” He scratched the bottom of his ear. “That’s looking at it one way.”

“So is it just like, one addendum or two?” Link then asked, speaking up while Zelda took a sip from her drink.

“Multiple. A lot... I-- actually, it’ll be a lot easier to just show than to explain?”

The two Hylians looked at him with curiosity and decided to follow him to another room. 

When he unlocked the door, he walked in first and stepped to the side to all the other two in, thankful for the early afternoon sun being a source of light. Zelda covered her mouth in shock at the otherwise clustered room filled with endless paperwork scattered from where they stood all the way to the other side. It was shocking and hard to believe, but a quick look at her expression was enough to know that she understood what Graham meant when he referred himself going cross-eyed.

“Oh my-- this... this is absurd.” Zelda muttered, glancing every now again between Link and Graham. “This is abs-- this is a library-- no. That would insult libraries. This is an addendum tomb!”

Graham gave a small whine as Link lightly patted his back in sympathy as Zelda went off giving the room more depressing descriptions. 

“Uh... Zelda?” Link cleared his throat.

“A book’s living nightmare!” Zelda gasped and looked his way. “Yes?”

Link just gave a small gesture to the king and Zelda quickly cleared her throat. “Oh, right, my apologies. I’m sorry.” She frowned and walked over to Graham, placing a hand on his shoulder. “Didn’t mean to go off like that.”

“I said it was a lot...” Graham frowned.

“I know, you weren’t kidding.” She looked back at the messy room and placed her hands on her hips as she clicked her tongue. “Right, best get started.”

“Huh?” The two looked at her as she looked at them with a smirk.

“Link, I’ll need you to be our water-knight, keep the food and drinks coming and make sure we don’t get crushed by a sudden paper-avalanche. Graham, if you don’t mind grabbing for me a chair? Maybe also a good pillow or four. We’re going to be sitting for quite some time.”

“Wait, why am I basically being an errand boy? I want to help out.” Link pouted.

“Do you know how to look at decrees and knowing which one is legit and another is just a slipped in paperwork from a potentially lazy knight?” She asked cheerfully.

“I... no. No I don’t.” Link clicked his tongue. “Annnnnnd what kind of tea would you like?”

Zelda just laughed as Link smiled warmly.

“I... w-what do you mean?” The King asked. “Why sitting for a while? What’s going on?”

“What do you think?” Zelda grinned. “I’m going to help you with the addendums.” 

~~~~

The hours melted away and the cups were perpetually refilled while the snacks were quickly depleted. Link walked around the room and started the fireplace, filling the room with warmth against the cold night air that was trying to make its way in. He glanced at the scene and noted that the room did look significantly different than it did earlier.

From piles upon messy piles of paper littered across like an endless sea, they were more or less stacked properly on one side of the room in different orderly piles: Granted, Denied, and Needs Revision.

He walked over and picked up five of the notes from the Denied pile and noted that Zelda was not kidding when she said that there were potentially lazy knights and other civilians trying to weasel their way out of things by playing at Graham’s empathy.

“Okay, so this one,” Zelda said as she pushed the next parchment over to the king, “is addendum number 07282015, wanting to start from scratch an establish plot of land. What’s the pros and cons?”

Graham took hold of it and read it carefully, tapping the end of the quill to his chin. “The cons would be that it could backfire, potentially damaging the land and its crops for good with just blindly starting from scratch. However the pros would be that if it were a farmland, it could be that the land was slowly dying or wasn’t getting enough nutrients, so it would require for it to started from scratch.”

“Sounds equally matched.”

“Yeah...”

“Now humor me, did it mention farmlands?” She asked, leaning back in her seat.

“Hmm... no, I-- oh. Wait. Right here.” Graham showed Zelda the sentence and tapped at it lightly. “This one has it written in the fine print. Kind of a hassle.”

“So...?”

Graham thought for a moment before looking confidently at Zelda. “Needs to be revised. It’s there, but it should be more clear. Too many room for loopholes.”

“Atta king!” Zelda grinned as Graham stood up and placed it neatly in its proper pile, giving a small punch in the arm once he sat back down. “See? It’s not so bad.”

“No, just extremely tedious.” Graham chuckled as he placed the quill down and leaned back into his chair, looking over and saw only a small reasonable pile left. He smiled.

"That is very true.” The Hylian Queen nodded in agreement. “Least favorite thing to do, really. But once you get into a rhythm then it just goes by in a snap.”

“I can see that.”

“And between you and me, sometimes I bring in a bard to play on the flute or harp. Nice background music.” Zelda whispered.

Graham quirked a brow and looked at Link who was placing down a fresh tray of drinks and snacks. “This true?”

“I’m the bard.”

He looked at Zelda who looked delighted with herself as she was grinning from ear to ear and he couldn’t help but laugh. 

“And such a wonderful bard you are!” She praised through her warm laughs before she rested her forearms on the table and looked at Graham. “Anyways, how are you feeling? Better?”

“Much better.” Graham nodded, smiling appreciatively. “I... really. Thank you for helping me. I would’ve probably just taken an advice or two and been alright with that. You really didn’t need to go this out of the way for me. Especially since this isn’t your kingdom, technically.”

“Nonsense.” She waved. “My kingdom or not, these kind of things are tricky. You saw that based on just how many are in the Denied pile.”

Graham looked over and saw that it was an overwhelming amount that was denied while a small portion was approved and a good chunk needed revision. He sighed and nodded, looking around the room and lightly tapped the table. “Yeah.”

“Got something on your mind?” Link then asked. 

“I... yeah.” He nodded.

“Then share. Get whatever is one your mind off by talking. A clear headed ruler is more efficient then one stuck with heavy thoughts.” Zelda suggested.

He contemplated for a moment, but truth be told he felt comfortable around them. Safe, even. “It just... It felt like there’s been this like... this huge boulder on my chest just pressing down on me. It’s been like that ever since I was crowned and all I could think about was if I was doing it right or if maybe this is all some kind of prank and I’ll be replaced. Like, if I couldn’t solve these issues or if I approved the wrong ones, was I even good enough to rule?” Graham shook his head. “I know it’s not... not the best thoughts, but... I’ve been having those thoughts.”

The sounds of the fire cracking in the fireplace was all that was heard and Zelda spoke in a low voice. “How long have you been having those thoughts?”

“Since I was crowned.” He admitted.

Neither she nor Link said anything and instead she extended her hand out and placed it on Graham’s shoulder. “Well, I did say during your coronation that if you ever needed help to get in touch with me. And you did. And I’m glad you did.” She reassured. “And no matter what, even if it’s something as trivial as knowing how to hold your hands in long meetings or the type of smile to give, you just get in touch with me and I’ll come as fast I can, okay?”

“You sure?”

She nodded. “Positive.”

Graham smiled and exhaled. “That... means a lot to hear, you have no idea.”

She smiled back. “I’m sure. Now then, lets finish up the rest of these addendums.”

“Right.”

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