When Patton woke up on the Saturday morning after Valentine’s Day he wasn’t expecting to find himself on his couch. Nor was he expecting to find himself spooning someone, the bitter taste of last night’s wine explaining the throbbing in his head. He groaned, pushing himself carefully upright and rubbing his eyes.
The figure he’d been cuddled up to revealed itself to be his best friend and partner-in-singlehood Eve. Who was also now stirring with a groan.
“I knew I hated Valentine’s for a reason…” He croaked, rolling off the edge of the couch and sprawling out flat on the floor in the gap between the coffee table and the couch that Patton was still laying on, deep in misery himself and only barely able to muster a modicum of empathy. “God, what did we drink?!” Eve wondered, throwing an arm over his eyes. “Pat, Pats, I’m gonna die right here okay? Just leave me to get on with it, I promise I won’t make a mess. I’ll be a great house guest when I come back and haunt the place.”
Patton snorted, climbing carefully over his pitiful best friend in search of coffee, water, or both. Actually definitely both. “You and me both, my horizontal friend. I think it was just wine, by the way,” he added, casting a quick eye around and seeing only wine bottles and nothing worse. “Worse hangovers but at least we’ll recover quicker.”
“If you’re you, sure,” Eve grumbled, using the coffee table to leverage himself upright so he could join the hunt for life-giving liquids. “You have some kinda magical regeneration powers, I swear. I’m gonna need, hey why did you stop, go into the kitchen babe, that’s where the coffee is- oh.”
“Oh indeed. This really takes the cake, huh?” Patton commented mildly, staring at the state of his kitchen.
“What the f-”
“Frosting!” Patton darted forwards in dismay at the sight of several open tubs of frosting, moaning sadly when he found them dried mostly solid and entirely unusable. “Oh bad Last Night Patton, c’mon dude. You should know to always put the lids back on!”
“This is a lot of cake.”
Patton’s lips twitched up in a smile and he glanced slyly at his dumbfounded friend. “More than just a pound’a cake, huh?”
Eve stared at him flatly.
“Y’know, like pound ca-”
“Yeah no I got it. It’s just too early and I’m too hungover to exact the retribution that deserves right now. Count yourself lucky.”
Patton snickered anyway, moving a plate with a perfect Victoria sponge off the top of the coffee machine and handing it to Eve. Eve of course just started eating it, humming in satisfaction. The coffee machine beeped and clunked and gurgled as it turned on and got started on the first cup and Patton left it to take stock.
“So, we had a good Pal-entine’s then, I guess?”
Eve swallowed his mouthful, eyebrow raised skeptically. “Pat, last night we accidentally made ten cakes…”
They silently stared at each other. Eve had a great poker face but nothing beat Patton’s, and Eve cracked a smile soon enough, bursting out laughing. Patton joined in and they were soon gasping at each other incoherently, surrounded by glorious cake-os. Eve managed to recover enough to speak just the once, wiping his teary eyes and whimpering with repressed mirth.
“My dear friend; I think we had the best Pal-entine’s ever!”