Chapter Text
How to find a boyfriend
1. Buy new clothes
2. Ask Ten to help you style them
3. Be nicer
"That's it?" Jisung asks, looking at Chenle's list suspiciously. He doesn't seem to be too impressed, Chenle notices, but that's not what Chenle expected anyway and that's not why he called him here.
"Well, obviously it's not finished, that's why I need your help," he points out, plopping down on the chair with a sigh. It's not always easy dealing with Jisung, having to explain everything to him and hoping he'll understand it quickly enough to be able to keep up with Chenle's ever-changing plans and all of his impulsive ideas. Chenle bears with it because he's a good friend, to everyone, but especially to Jisung, patience being one of his more prominent traits, which is precisely what allows him to not get annoyed when Jisung gives him the look he's giving him right now.
"How am I supposed to help you? I don't think you even need the list, especially not with items like these," he says, pointing at the number one in confusion. "Why would you need to buy new clothes? There's nothing wrong with what you're wearing right now and if some boy doesn't agree with that, then he shouldn't be your boyfriend anyway."
He says it with such certainty, like he knows exactly what he's talking about, probably not aware that he sounds like a character from some cheesy kids show, foolishly talking about some ideal world where everyone's happy and no one needs to dress to impress! Chenle has to give him a sad smile. Poor, innocent, Jisung, always so naive and clueless, talking about boys like he has any knowledge on the subject or any idea about how the world works. Chenle knows he's not just saying this to make him feel better either, Jisung really does believe everything he's saying, and that's what makes it even sadder.
"Of course you wouldn't understand," Chenle says back, rolling his eyes dramatically, "But it's fine! I didn't call you here to worry about any of that, I just need you to help me add more things to the list."
It seems like Chenle lost him again, if Jisung's furrowed eyebrows are anything to go by. Feeling like he's starting to slowly lose his patience, Chenle stands up and walks over to sit on his bed, right next to Jisung. Before the other has the chance to say anything, Chenle speaks up. "Also, I need you to make me a better person," he says simply, going straight to the point. There's no use in dragging this any longer, it's not like Chenle has any time to waste, not now when both of his brothers have boyfriends. It's his turn now, and the only way to quickly carry out his plan is to make himself better, and the only person he can think of, that can really help him with that, is Jisung!
Don't get him wrong, Chenle is perfectly happy with how he turned out to be, with all his little flaws that actually make him even cuter, in his humble opinion, but he also knows that in order to find a boyfriend, he needs to at least be a little nicer. And to, like, try harder. Like, in life, in general. Which is essentially the polar opposite of what's going on right now, and Chenle knows not everyone would be into this. Not everyone is willing to put up with him the way Jisung always does. Not everyone is patient and understanding like his best friend is.
His best friend, who's currently looking at him like he can't quiet believe what Chenle is saying. Here we go again!
"Can I say something now?" Jisung asks, just as Chenle's about to explain to him again why this is of great importance and why they need to act quickly and not waste any time on unnecessary questions.
Sighing loudly, Chenle falls back on the bed in resignation, reluctantly accepting that it probably wouldn't kill him if he let Jisung speak. Maybe it's better to get it over with at the beginning, with Jisung's inevitable questions, that is. But that boy is too curious about everything, too eager to get to the bottom of things and Chenle isn't particularly fond of it, especially not now. He's about to say something possibly mean to express how annoyed he is about how long this is taking, but then he remembers that patience is one of his more prominent traits, so he decides to hold his tongue. At least for now.
"Yes, yes, you can, I'm listening," he says, arms above his head and legs restlessly dangling from the edge of the bed, feet hitting the frame occasionally. Jisung notices, of course he does, and he puts his hand on Chenle's knee to still it.
"Okay. First, I have a question. But don't get mad, I just really don't get it," Jisung says and when Chenle looks up, he can see slight worry painted all over his face. Ridiculous.
He lifts himself up and gives Jisung a good look. "Jisung, let ME ask a question first. How long have we known each other?"
Jisung looks confused at first, but then he rolls his eyes, like he knows exactly where Chenle's going with this. "Chenle -" he starts, but Chenle's not having any of this.
"No, no, answer the question please!"
"Since we were six," Jisung recites in a monotone that suggests he's already repeated those words many times before.
Chenle is not fazed. "Exactly! Which means there's nothing you could say that would make me mad. Okay?"
"Okay," comes a dull reply. A beat passes, then two and three and Jisung's still not saying anything, just staring at Chenle in what the latter thinks is contemplation. Chenle thinks that if he's ever gonna strangle anyone, it might as well be Jisung in this particular moment. Jisung, whose lips are pursed and who scrunches his nose in annoyance before finally saying what's on his mind. "Where is this even coming from? This need to find a boyfriend as soon as possible. I don't get it."
Is this what was bothering him? This is what made him all nervous? Chenle can't believe that he needs to repeat himself again! Was their brief, but certainly comprehensive, phone call not sufficient for Jisung?
"I told you this already! Jaehyun and Xiao Jun got boyfriends! Both of them! And you know how they are! They've always been closer, being the twins and everything, but it's not just about that. They have more things in common, they get each other better, and now they both went and got boyfriends at the same time. Literally, on the same night! So, naturally, I need to do that too!" he says, taking a deep breath once he's done. Jisung, the poor thing, is still looking at him like he doesn't quite understand. This time, Chenle practically screams when he speaks next. "I don't know how I can make this any more clear to you!"
"Well, you can start by telling me since when do you like boys," Jisung blurts out and Chenle knows he didn't plan on saying it like this, this abruptly, judging by the way he's looking at him now, like a deer caught in the headlights. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to just - It's just, you never said anything and -"
"Stop apologizing, Jisung, it's incredibly annoying!" Chenle says in the most annoyed voice he could muster. In reality, he's not that annoyed. Jisung's question actually makes sense and Chenle has to admit he never really gave this whole thing enough thought. Admit to himself, sure, but not out loud, not to Jisung. Instead, what he says is: "I just do, okay? I should ask you how you know that you DON'T like boys? Huh? You've never kissed a boy, how can you be sure that you wouldn't like it? Actually, no, I have an even better example. How do you know that you like girls if you never kissed one? Huh? Huh!?"
Jisung stares at him with wide eyes, before he lifts his hands up in surrender. "Jesus, calm down, it was just a question. And I don't know, by the way. I'm not really sure who I like," he says simply, like they're talking about their classes or something equally as unimportant. Chenle almost envies how calm the other seems to be about the whole thing.
He's also kind of shocked and can't believe Jisung's only mentioning this now. "Well, who's keeping secrets now?"
"I haven't been keeping a secret," Jisung starts, getting up from Chenle's bed to go sit on the chair instead. "I'm just not sure. It's not like I've been thinking about it a lot - I haven't. It's just - I've never really liked a girl that much and I haven't liked any boys, but I think I think that both boys and girls are cute. I don't know," he concludes and Chenle notices how Jisung's not looking his way anymore, his head is hanging low and he seems almost shy. It's kind of cute, objectively, but Chenle also doesn't want the other boy to feel embarrassed about this, or whatever he's feeling right now that's making him look so small and dejected.
Still, it's kinda funny, what Jisung just said, and Chenle can't exactly miss the opportunity to tease his best friend, not even in a moment like this. "You think you think?" he asks teasingly, a small smirk appearing on his face.
Jisung looks up then, and even though he tries to make it seem like he's not happy with Chenle's comment, it's obvious that he's relieved they're back to teasing and done with the serious talk. The small smile he's trying to hide gives it away. Chenle would know, he knows everything about Jisung. "Shut up! I told you I haven't really thought about it that much anyway."
Chenle laughs, sitting up to have a better look at his friend. He decides that it's probably better to be on the same page, especially if he expects Jisung to help him with this thing. So, he tells him exactly how it is. "No, I get it. It's possible that I haven't exactly thought this thing through either."
That earns him a little smile from Jisung. "Okay. So why are jumping into this then? And please don't say it's because of Jaehyun and Xiao Jun, because that's not a good enough reason!"
"Well, it is because of them! But, it's fine that you don't understand, I'm not expecting that you do when you have a sister who loves you and only you!" Chenle exclaims, his voice getting progressively louder the more he speaks. "You never had to compete for her love when it's always been just the two of you!"
When he's finally done with his rant, he notices the look on Jisung's face, something akin to pity painted all over it and he immediately regrets saying anything. He doesn't want Jisung to pity him, he wants him to help him! But before he has the chance to say anything else, that he was joking and that it's not a big deal, Jisung speaks up. "First of all, both of your brothers adore you, with or without a boyfriend, and second of all, I really think you shouldn't get one just so that you could be like them. It's just not right. And I promise you that they don't care if you have a boyfriend or not, I'm sure of it. There has to be another way to -"
"Oh my god, you're a genius!" Chenle squeaks, interrupting Jisung mid sentence when he gets the best idea in the world. How did he not think of this before?
"- get closer to them," Jisung's saying, but it doesn't matter anymore, whatever he wanted to say is not important now that Chenle got the best idea in the world.
"No, no, I'm still doing the boyfriend thing," he says quickly, impatient to fill Jisung in on his amazing new plan, but impressed with himself above anything else, "but there is another way. How did I not think of this before?"
"I don't like where this is going," Jisung says carefully, but with determination, sending a sceptical look his way. Chenle ignores it, too busy trying to work out all the details of his amazing new plan. How is he such a genius? He thinks about all the kids in his class that are better than him in practically every subject, but would they be able to think of something like this? Something this genius, this innovative? Chenle knows they wouldn't and he pities them. All their book knowledge - finally useless for once in their lives.
"Chenle!" Jisung says loudly, trying to get his attention back. When Chenle snaps out of his daydream, he sees an impatient look on his best friend's face, which is pretty unusual for him.
"Oh, you're gonna hate this," he admits excitedly, "I can tell you that right away. But it was basically your idea, so you have to get on board."
Jisung doesn't seem to agree with his logic. "How was it my idea?" he asks with disbelief. "I don't even know what you're talking about, and frankly I don't think I even want to know," he concludes, crossing his arms petulantly.
He looks kind of ridiculous, Chenle thinks, getting sulky like this all of a sudden. It's obvious he's quite annoyed about the whole thing, but Chenle also knows he's curious about his plan, too curious to resist asking to know more about it.
But Chenle can wait, he's extremely patient after all, so he grabs his phone from his nightstand and pretends to be engrossed in something, occasionally pressing his fingers on his home screen so that it would look like he's texting someone.
It only takes a few seconds for Jisung to crack. "Fine, tell me!"
Chenle doesn't even try to hide his victorious smile. "Maybe I don't actually have to get a boyfriend," he starts, throwing his phone carelessly next to him to give all his attention to Jisung again, "Maybe I just have to make them think I have one, you know?"
It takes a few seconds, and Chenle notices the exact moment Jisung realizes what he's getting at, because his face changes drastically, his eyes get super wide and his mouth opens slightly. He looks comical and Chenle has to chuckle.
"No, no, no that's a horrible idea! These things never work out! And where would you even find -"
A poorly timed knock on the door interrupts Jisung's frantic blabbering, but Chenle is kind of glad because that was honestly getting nowhere and he hopes this interruption gives Jisung enough time to realize how brilliant his idea actually is.
"Come in!" he screams and the door slowly opens to reveal Xiao Jun and Jaehyun on the other side, a trail of cookies and two glasses of juice in their hands.
"Hey, Jisung!" they say in unison and Chenle has to roll his eyes. How incredibly annoying that is! They step inside to leave the snacks on the table and Jaehyun goes to ruffle Jisung's hair. "We just thought you might be hungry," Xiao Jun says, "But we'll be going now," Jaehyun adds. "It looks like we interrupted something."
Chenle frowns, not understanding what they meant, but then he sees Jisung, a mixture of shock, confusion and annoyance on his face and he feels the need to roll his eyes again. Typical Jisung and his inability to hide anything.
"Anyways, you boys have fun," he hears one of his brothers say, but he's busy thinking, contemplating if what he's about to do is another one of his genius ideas or the stupidest thing he's ever thought of. "And please don't fight," the other adds, and this one is Xiao Jun, he's pretty sure.
"Why would we fight?" he hears himself ask, "Why would I fight with my boyfriend?"
There's a loud gasp, that one is Jisung, and two shocked faces looking at him. "Yes, it's true," he continues, the words practically falling out of his mouth on their own, "I also have a boyfriend now, Jisung right here," he adds unnecessarily, pointing at his friend, but avoiding his eyes. "Close the door on your way out, please!"
After the initial shock, his brothers quickly snap out of it. "That's great, Chenle!" Jaehyun exclaims, but he still looks a little confused at best. "We'll talk about this later," Xiao Jun adds and then they're out of his room, leaving him to be alone with Jisung once again.
It's quiet for a while, with none of them saying anything, but even worse than that, it's awkward, even for Chenle, and that's not something that happens often. He somehow can't seem to be able to meet Jisung's eyes, which is ridiculous really, he's Chenle's best friend, has been since they were six, so there's really nothing to be scared of.
With this new surge of confidence, Chenle finally looks up at Jisung to find him already looking back at him. "Look," he starts, but Jisung is faster.
"I'm gonna kill you!"