Work Text:
If there was one thing Yoshikage Kira hated about being a salaryman, it was the enclosed space of the office. Most of the day was spent sitting around at a long shared desk, writing and typing away with low chatter if a few were working on a team project. Only the best got a separate cubicle, and he wouldn’t dare stand out as one of the elite. Maybe in the projected future, if it seemed natural and normal. Instead, he would sit between the quietest colleagues and keep a heavy, almost intense focus on his own workload. After that it would be time for lunch and he’d be able to take a moment for himself.
The only problem were those who took smoke breaks. And he sat next to one.
The Market Regional Management section of Kameyu Department Store allowed its workers limited smoke breaks that were separated and not too frequent. Most allotted themselves three a day: in the morning, in the afternoon, and in the evening. Kira never went, the idea of smoking repulsive to him from the act to the smell, not to mention it affected the nails and skin on one's hands. Staining of the fingertips and nails was never appealing, and he’s sure there would be a lingering taste.
Kosaku Kawajiri, the man he sat next to, indulged in these breaks. While he didn’t go on all of them, which depended on various factors of his workload, it was noticeable when he wanted to get up. He would shoot Kira multiple glances, attempting to see what he was doing and how important it was. If it was a report, Kawajiri would stay put. If it was a presentation, he might get up. If it was something as simple as emails, then he would ask in a quiet voice if Kira could scoot in a bit before ushering out an apology alongside “thank you” and “excuse me.”
The man was a giant pushover and it could only be described as pathetic. It was rare to hear his voice, even if he was asked a direct question. He would never look anyone in the eyes. At gatherings and events, he would stand off onto the side, alone, and wait for it to be over. He, like Kira, wanted to stay out of the spotlight as much as possible, yet everything he did was laced with a thick layer of awkwardness that all but forced someone to fixate on him, even for just a minute. In a way, Kira almost felt sorry for him. Almost.
Now it was the afternoon, the heat from the summer sun hitting them all from the window. It was one of those rare days where Kira took his suit jacket off, hanging it on the back of his chair with the sleeves of his pastel dress shirt rolled up to his elbow. There was a thin layer of sweat that rested on his forehead, always returning even after he wiped it away. The air conditioning had broke upon their arrival and was set to be fixed once they left. That combined with the amount of people there made the office hell, literally.
What didn’t help was that Kira could feel Kawajiri’s eyes glancing towards him from time to time, and once in his peripheral vision he caught him staring. A wave of annoyance raced through him, hating the fact that he was so passive and indirect. It would be easier, much easier, just to ask instead of waiting. That’s what most people would do. While he knew such a minor thing shouldn’t piss him off like this it was reaching that line, and that was a first for this matter. Maybe the heat was getting to him.
That’s when Kira clicked out of the presentation he was making, unable to think of anything else to add right now. It wasn’t done. The people talking at both ends of the table were too much of a distraction for him, not to mention the growing heat. He opened up his emails with no goal in mind. There was a new one but to be honest he didn’t feel like answering it, so instead he opened up a different window and searched up the general things that could be used for later. It was then when he felt a light tap on his shoulder, shifting his head over.
“Kira-san, could I please get by?”
Without answering, Kira grabbed his chair and scooted it in until his stomach almost touched the table. It was uncomfortable. Kawajiri gave him a nod in appreciation, standing up and doing his best to pass through with ease, although he did move Kira’s jacket. He rolled his eyes, unable to find the motivation to care. It was just so hot in here and he wanted to find some sort of escape, but none could be found. For a moment he was jealous of his coworker, able to take some time for himself to go outside, leave this stuffy office space, regardless of the reason.
That’s when it hit Kira.
He could do the same.
Although he wasn’t a smoker, it wasn’t like anyone outside was going to rat him out. Kawajiri definitely wouldn’t. Besides, maybe some fresh air would do him some good. A few deep breaths of it would allow him to clear his head and then he could finish the presentation that was due tomorrow. Anything would be better than this office right now.
Moving his chair back, he felt one of the legs hit something. Using his foot to get behind it, he pushed it forward so he could look down at whatever it was. It was a purple lighter. While it was his favorite color it wasn’t his, which meant it belonged to Kawajiri. How awkward and frustrating it must be to go outside wanting to smoke only to find out you lost your lighter. The thought made him smirk. He picked it up and put it in his pocket. At least now he had an excuse to leave.
Getting up, he maneuvered his way behind a few of his coworkers before he headed out the door. That’s when he stretched his arms above his head, moving his hips to listen to them crack. He was on the fifth floor and needed to take the elevator down to the ground floor, or he could take the stairs, but they were farther away. There was no one in the hallway, so this was one of the only chances where the elevator would be void of people. That would be a welcomed change.
It didn’t take long before he was out of it, taking a right to head for the back doors. That’s where the designated smoking area was. Outside was a small patio with a few modest seats and blooming flowers. One could describe it as cute, contrasting the gross acts that were being permitted. There were only a few times Kira found himself here, all of them involving being forced to mingle with his coworkers which left him going home irritated. At least this time there was only one other person who caught his sight.
Kawajiri stood there, an unlit cigarette posed between his lips as he fumbled around his own pockets in search for what Kira had in his own. He watched his hands for a moment. They weren’t the worst he’d ever seen, and maybe with a proper manicure and a better health regime they would be okay. Whenever they sat next to one another he couldn’t help but notice lingering dirt under his nails. It was gross, but in the reality of the situation he didn’t care. It wasn’t hard to find someone who had better.
Turning around, Kawajiri jumped when he saw Kira standing there, a dull look in his eyes as he took a few steps forward. He pulled the cigarette out of his mouth. “Kira-san, I didn’t think you smoked.”
“I don’t.”
“Oh.” He looked around for a moment while he was at a loss for words. The two never socialized much with one another aside from occasional four sentence conversations, and those were in the office. Here, a more casual environment, was a different story. He should’ve found it easier to speak but there was something about Kira that always made him feel on edge and he couldn’t place his finger on it. “I was going to ask you if you had a light.”
Without hesitation, Kira pulled the purple lighter out of his pocket and handed it to him. “I have yours.” The other man cocked a brow at him, unsure if he was supposed to take it. “You dropped it in the office,” he clarified.
Something was mumbled under Kawajiri’s breath that Kira couldn’t make out, his hand reaching out to pick it up. The tips of his fingers were clammy and they stroked against Kira’s palm, sending an odd sensations down his spine. His lips quivered with a thin layer of disgust, unable to keep his eyes off the other man’s hand. Kawajiri’s nails were uneven and he knew he was leaving a faint scent behind. What was unexpected, however, was how soft and gentle they were. It was nice, strange enough.
“Thank you.”
That brought Kira out of his minor trance as he replied with only a nod. Looking around for a moment, he decided to take a seat in one of the chairs facing a standing Kawajiri who just lit his cigarette. Leaning back, he crossed a leg over the other and watched as he took a long drag. The cigarette stayed steady between his nimble fingers, moving from his lip and down to this side at various points. His chest would expand when he inhaled the smoke, holding it inside for a few passing seconds before he released it into the hot air at a slow and steady rate. Kira never saw where it went, instead keeping his focus on his hands.
His mind was soon preoccupied with ways he could improve them. He would have to touch them first, stroke and caress them so he could understand what he was working with. The first order of business would be to file his nails down, making sure all were not only appropriate length but the same as well. Who knows how long that would take. It needed to be perfect.
The bowl of hot water he would’ve filled would have cooled down by now. It would be a little more than lukewarm. Before submerging Kawajiri’s hands he would add a few drops of deep cleansing soap and swirl it around with a small utensil until there were small foamy bubbles. They wouldn’t stay in for too long, no more than five minutes. During that, Kira would work the mixture into the delicate skin, taking a focus to in between his fingers. If his cuticles were bad, which they probably were, he would push them back with a gentle touch.
Once the time was up and he was satisfied he would pull them out and dry them off with one of his dark, fluffy hand towels. Now he would be able to take a moment to relax as lotioning the hand was his favorite part. He would squeeze a generous amount into his own hands, taking a moment to breath in the lavender scent before rubbing his own together to warm it up. Afterwards he would take his hands individually and work it in each nook and cranny of the delicate skin. Massaging his fingers would make him blush if he was being honest, always finding the act too intimate. They needed to be soft, that was the only way he liked them.
Now it was time for the nails. Soaking a cotton pad with some nail polish remover, he would swipe them over Kawajiri’s nails one at a time to make sure he got rid of any excess moisture. The polish wouldn’t stick properly otherwise. It would then be time for his favorite part: painting them. Quick and easy, he would take a hold of a finger, taking a moment to admire their new feeling before using the soaked brush to leave a clear coat of polish that shined. It would look so nice when dried.
When that was completed, he would lotion them once more and bring it up his arms a bit. As a reward he would bring it up to his cheek and rub himself against him, allowing all the stress that was on his shoulders to alleviate. He could even indulge in a small taste, wrapping his tongue around his ring finger for just a second. Lotion would overpower his senses, but it would be worth it. After doing all that work to fix them it would be a waste to not worship them, at least for a little bit.
Before Kira could delve further into his own thoughts he heard Kawajiri speak his name. His cigarette was half gone. “Hot in that office, isn’t it?” Kira nodded at the obvious statement, feeling a sense of relief from the slight breeze even though it was warm. “Yea, I didn’t even want this but I felt like I needed some excuse to leave. Even just for a bit.” The words that left Kawajiri’s lips were strained, an awkward chuckle was the undertone as if he didn’t know if he was allowed to speak. There were a few moments of silence before Kira heard him sigh. “How’s that presentation going Kira-san?”
He shrugged at first, shifting his legs. “Fine I suppose.”
“When’s it due?”
“Tomorrow.”
“Ah. Good luck then.”
The rest of his cigarette was finished in silence. Kawajiri considered getting another one, shoving his hands in his pockets before deciding against it as he lingered around Kira. The tension could be cut with a knife but somehow it was comforting for reasons unable to be explained. Kira closed his eyes for a moment, taking a deep breath. “How do you smoke those things?”
Catching him off guard, Kawajiri gave him a look that could be confused with a smile. Now it was his turn to shrug. “Stress relief I guess?”
“They smell terrible. I bet they taste terrible too.”
“Why don’t you try one and find out?”
Kira shot him a confused glance as he listened to him laugh, watching all the features on his face scrunch up as he brought a hand out of his pocket to run through his hair. A smirk rose on Kira’s lips. “Only if I can fit it into my schedule.”
“Kira-san? Was that a joke? Never thought I’d see the day.”
He didn’t reply, instead standing up to hint that they should be on their way. They walked inside and made an unspoken unanimous decision to take the elevator together. It was Kawajiri who pressed both buttons as Kira tried to resist the urge to look at his hands, although he failed both times. He wanted to fix them up for reasons unknown. The ride was silent and so was the walk back to the office, ignoring the looks a few coworkers gave them when they stepped inside.
Upon sitting down Kira got straight to work on his presentation, flooding the thought of Kawajiri’s hands out of his mind.