Work Text:
"He took a deep breath, and crossed the floor of blades and constellations to the other boy’s side. He stood at the foot of the stairs, looking down.
“But of course,” he said, very softly, “your sentiments are reciprocated.”
He stooped over him, tilting his chin up. Their lips met. The other boy made a soft sound, almost like surrender, stretching under his body. He slid an arm around his neck and pulled him down onto the stairs."
Unidentified Snippet, Cassandra Clare, Chain of Gold, The Last Hours.
Alastair Carstairs could hardly believe this was occurring, he had pulled Thomas upon the stairs of the London Institute after his bold confession. He didn’t quite anticipate the heavy thud of their bodies against the steps, or Thomas’ gasp as he stared wide eyed at their new position. Alastair could feel a faint blush rising to his cheeks, thankfully it was the dead of night and only their nephilim vision even enabled them to see anything at all. After a moment Thomas let out a small chuckle, lifting his sturdy weight off of him to help get more comfortable.
“What are you laughing at Lightwood?” Alastair’s hold on Thomas’ neck tightened defensively, but Thomas only gave him a knowing look.
“I think you’re absolutely impossible, but I like that about you...obviously.”
“If you’re trying to flatter me it's not working, you-!” Alastair scowled, but Thomas reached up to cup his face, halting any insult he was going to say.
“I know you’re accustomed to picking a fight with the world, but you don’t have to with me, not anymore.” He whispered, as Alastair swallowed back his habit. “I’ll fight alongside you.”
“Will you?” Alastair didn’t want to hope, even with their improper position and kiss. “Despite everything?”
“You think you’re the only sinner in this world?” Thomas didn’t comment on the obvious, that what this was between them, was viewed as an abomination in the mundane and potentially Shadowhunter society. Alastair knew first hand how the world treated those who stepped out of line, was Thomas that willing to be dragged down with him, if it came to that?
“I know I’m not, but my family-” before Alastair could come up with even more excuses, Thomas pressed a finger to his lips, and took a deep breath.
“I understand. There is a lot at stake, for all of us. I don’t care.” Thomas declared. Alastair shivered at Thomas’ confidence, something he always worked hard to pretend he carried.
“I care a lot,” He admitted, slumping against Thomas’ torso, and Thomas’s expression softened as he shifted to help him sit up more comfortably.
“Maybe it’s time you shared that with others, isn’t that why your family is in London?” Thomas reminded him. If it were anyone else they may have been offended, but Alastair appreciated Thomas’ honesty; the Lightwood family and their tight knit group knew more about the Carstairs’ circumstances than other Shadowhunter families. “You can gain allies.”
Alastair closed his eyes and shook his head. “No one wants to be allies with someone like me. That’s why my sister has to marry into a good standing family instead of myself. Our name is tarnished.”
“That’s rubbish,” Thomas scoffed. “What is the point of risking our lives for the greater good if we have to deal with this political nonsense?”
“I wouldn’t speak that way in Charles’ presence,” Alastair chuckled despite everything. Thomas was more outspoken since his academy days, and it sometimes still threw him off guard remembering the timid boy that would follow him around despite his rude behaviour.
“There it is.” Thomas brushed Alastair’s lips with his thumb. Alastair had forgotten that his hand was still on his cheek, the touch felt so natural. “You’re smiling.”
Alastair reached up to hold Thomas’ hand resting on his face, and narrowed his eyes. “Don’t change the subject of conversation.”
Thomas bent down to press a chaste kiss on his other cheek, and Alastair shivered despite himself. “I think you’re the one avoiding the subject but I digress.”
“I don’t want to be on the steps anymore.” Alastair decided, turning his head to gaze at Thomas’ perplexed expression. “Take me upstairs.”
Thomas raised his eyebrows but nodded, grunting as he stood up and held his hand out. Alastair grasped it and was hefted up easily, but he still stared up at Thomas with a newfound conviction. “Can you...clarify what this relocation is for Alastair?”
“Continuing the discussion we’re having.” Alastair informed him, and paused before letting out a defeated sigh. “...and for you to keep kissing me, if you so desire.”
“As you wish,” Thomas gave Alastair a kind smile, the one that Alastair had witnessed him use on the people he cherished most, the friends and family he surrounded himself with. Alastair felt his cheeks heat up even more, but gripped Thomas tightly as he was led up the stairs towards the numerous bedrooms. He wasn’t certain he could express the words he had spoken again, but he knew there was no turning back once they ascended the stairs into a different way of life. Hopefully he wouldn’t navigate the storm of the world’s prejudice and scorn alone, he now had a sturdy compass to guide him.