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It’s Jin Ling’s birthday, and Jiang Yanli’s arranged something at the park so that the five-year-olds that have been invited to his party will have somewhere to run around like little hellions in. That’s why Jiang Cheng is spending his rare Saturday afternoon off from work sitting beside Jin Zixuan and his dog Lil’ White at a picnic table covered with enough utensils to feed a small army of kindergarteners, drinking paper-cup after paper-cup of pineapple soda and wishing he could be anywhere else.
“If you drink any more of that, I’m making you run to the grocery to get more,” says Jin Zixuan. “You have no idea how cranky the hellions will get if there’s not enough for all of them, and we have to give some of them a different flavor.”
Jiang Cheng tosses his cup into the waiting trash bag, and pops open a bag of chips with a glare at Jin Zixuan, daring him to complain. His brother-in-law rolls his eyes. Being married and having a kid had seriously mellowed Jin Zixuan. Jiang Cheng adds that to yet another way that his sister’s prissy peacock of a husband was irritating. Of course, thinking of that nickname immediately reminds him of Wei Wuxian, and – CRUNCH – Jiang Cheng bites angrily into the next tortilla chip. He’s not even going to ask for the dip – CRUNCH – because just thinking of his fool of a brother makes Jiang Cheng – crunch – furious. At least the bastard supposedly had work out of town this month, and Jiang Cheng didn’t have to see him today. He’d probably punch him if he did.
(Also, what sort of flavor was sour cream and onion? Which idiot had bought these things?)
That’s when he sees Wei Wuxian, coming towards the small Gazebo and the scattered picnic tables that they’ve staked out for the purpose of Jin Ling’s birthday. “What’s he doing here?” Jiang Cheng demands of his brother-in-law. Wei Wuxian wasn’t supposed to be there, A-jie had said he was away.
Jin Zixuan scowls faintly, “Look, it wasn’t my decision. You’ll have to take it up with your sister, I told her not to spring it on you, but she said that her son deserved to have both uncles present on his birthday. She made me promise not to warn you.”
“You would have?” asks Jiang Cheng, momentarily distracted from his brother staring at him from where he’s frozen to a stop.
“Yeah, I mean. I get why you’re angry with him. And A-Li admitted that he hasn’t even apologized to you yet.” He hadn’t, the bastard.
“Why’s he just standing over there?” asks Jin Zixuan, after a moment.
“Because Lil’ White is here,” he answers. They’re at one of the first tables because carting things here was easier and having an adult at this end would let them nab any of the children that try to escape to go exploring (Jin Ling’s classmate Lan Jingyi was a pain).
Wei Wuxian takes maybe three steps closer, but then he freezes again. He’s staring at Jiang Cheng, clearly waiting for him to tell Jin Zixuan to take his dog away, but Jiang Cheng just stares coolly back at him. He’s not about to do Wei Wuxian any favors. He can see an irritated expression cross Wei Wuxian’s face, and then he pulls out his phone and dials. Probably calling A-Li. Sure enough, his sister’s phone rings, but fortunately she’s left it in her handbag right here with all the food. Jiang Cheng grins as meanly as he can at his brother.
“I’ll tie her up,” says Jin Zixuan. “Come here, girl.”
Just as Jin Zixuan’s about to clip the lead onto his dog, and Wei Wuxian is cautiously coming closer, Jiang Cheng leans toward his brother in law. “Is there some way you can tie her loosely so he freaks out when he gets close?” he asks.
Jin Zixuan laughs. “I can do you one better. Hey sweetheart, see the man over there, he wants a high-five. Go give him a high-five darling.” With a woof of approval, Lil’ White shoots out from under the table as fast as she can.
Shit.
Jiang Cheng’s heart freezes in his throat, and he’s standing up and running after her almost immediately. But she’s a dog, a big one, and she had the head start. He hears Wei Wuxian shriek, sees him drop the bag and the present he’s carrying, as he turns and runs.
“No, stop! Lil’ White stop, leave him alone!”
But Wei Wuxian is running, and the dog decides that they must be playing tag, takes off after him with a happy bound, running into his knees so that Wei Wuxian gives another inhuman shriek as he turns around to get away from her.
They’re both going too fast, neither one looking where they’re going, Lil’ White gets close enough to jump up and put her paws on Wei Wuxian making him twist and step away – NO! – straight into the road and into – HONK!!!!! – the driver must hit the brakes but Wei Wuxian…
He falls, and.
Jiang Cheng falls to his knees beside his brother, there’s blood, his arm’s badly scraped up, but more importantly Wei Wuxian’s eyes are screwed shut.
“Wei Wuxian, can you hear me?”
Jin Zixuan is right behind him, he can hear his brother-in-law on the phone, calling for an ambulance.
“Please.”
“Can ‘ear you. Ugh,” says Wei Wuxian.
“We’ve got an ambulance coming, you’ll be fine,” says Jiang Cheng.
“Head hurts,” says Wei Wuxian. He carefully blinks his eyes open, then shuts them again with a soft groan. Jiang Cheng takes his less injured looking hand in his.
“I’m sorry it hurts. They’ll be here any minute, okay?”
“Jiang Cheng, his head,” says Jin Zixuan, and Jiang Cheng knows he must’ve just noticed what Jiang Cheng has been watching this whole time. The patch of blood beneath Wei Wuxian’s head has been growing steadily larger as they wait. Head wounds bleed a lot. He’ll be okay. He has to be okay.
“A-Cheng?” asks Wei Wuxian.
“I’m here,” says Jiang Cheng.
“Sorry I left. Didn’t tell. Sorry.” Wei Wuxian’s voice is soft but whining. He’s slurring a little.
“Shut up. If you think this shitty apology is enough, I’ll break your legs. Get better and apologize properly,” says Jiang Cheng. But he squeezes his brother’s hand gently, and Wei Wuxian squeezes back.
“Mm,” says Wei Wuxian.
“I can hear them,” says Jin Zixuan, and then Jiang Cheng can too. The ambulance, thank fuck.
“They’re here, you’ll be fine. D’you hear me Wei Wuxian?” He doesn’t though. Or if he does, he doesn’t react, his hand is limp in Jiang Cheng’s grasp. He changes his grip so he can feel Wei Wuxian’s pulse. “I will break your legs if you don’t wake up,” Jiang Cheng promises his brother’s unconscious body. “Don’t you fucking dare.”
And then the EMT’s are there, he steps away so that they can get to him, a somewhat hysterical young woman called Luo Qingyuan apologizes to him, even though it was his brother that threw himself into the street in front of her car.
(I’ll protect you from the dogs, he’d told his newly adopted brother nearly twenty years ago. I won’t let them get you, I promise.
Even if you think it’s silly?
Always. I’ll keep you safe.)
“Are you okay to drive?” asks Jin Zixuan, and Jiang Cheng nods. He is, he’s only feeling guilty, not dizzy, he can – Jin Zixuan takes his arm and leads him back into the park. He’s dialing someone else on his phone. “A-Yao? I’m sorry, I know you said you were busy, but I need you to find someone to drive Jiang Cheng to the hospital. We have twenty five-year-olds on our hands, A-Li and I can’t leave quickly, even if we start calling all the parents to come pick their kids up immediately.”
“No, he’s not hurt, it was Wei Wuxian. The ambulance took him to Qian Cao hospital, but I don’t want Jiang Cheng driving now.”
“I can drive,” says Jiang Cheng.
Jin Zixuan ignores him, says, “Thank you so much,” and after another pause, “Yeah, bye.”
“Just wait five minutes, apparently Lan Xichen is close, he was bringing a present for Jin Ling. I... Jiang Cheng I really had no idea, I know A-Li makes me tie up the dogs when he's visiting but I didn't know-”
"I know. He thinks it's embarrassing, so he told us not to tell you. You didn't know." But I did. I shouldn't have started it.
Jin Zixuan scrubs a hand through his hair roughly. "I still... he'll be okay. Not going to jinx it, he has to be fucking okay."
They’re interrupted by a call to Jiang Cheng’s phone, and when he pulls it out it's Lan Xichen. “Hello?”
“Tell me where I should pick you up? I’m nearing the parking lot near the water fountains,” says Lan Xichen.
“I’ll be there in a minute,” says Jiang Cheng. “I’ll let you know what’s happening after I get there,” he says to Jin Zixuan, and starts jogging in the right direction.
Lan Xichen isn’t alone, Lan Wangji is in his car as well, and Jiang Cheng slides into the rear passenger seat. “Thank you,” he says quietly, as Lan Xichen backs out of the park and onto the roads.
“It’s fine. How was he?”
“I don’t know. He lost consciousness just before the ambulance got there, and his arm looked badly broken. He kept saying that his head hurt.” Jiang Cheng hurts too, it’s like something is squeezing and squeezing his lungs, and it’s so hard to breathe over the pain. I promised.
“How?” asks Lan Wangji, and his voice is stiff. Years ago, that would have sounded bored to him, but now he can hear the worry. The anger.
“Jin Zixuan’s dog got loose. He wasn’t looking where he was going.”
That’s sufficient explanation. Although Wei Wuxian tried to keep his crippling fear of dogs secret, the Lan brothers had been present during a freak-out, once.
After a long silence, Lan Wangji says coldly, “He trusted you.”
“Wangji!” says Lan Xichen. “Apologize to Jiang Cheng, he doesn’t deserve that. It must've been an accident.”
“No,” says Jiang Cheng. “No, I do. I should have done something.”
“He’ll be okay. Both of you stop freaking out, Wei Wuxian will be fine,” says Lan Xichen.
Jiang Cheng hopes so. He really fucking hopes so.
*
Wei Wuxian sleeps for thirteen full weeks. They keep visiting while he’s comatose; Jin Zixuan, Jiang Yanli, and Jin Ling make it a weekly thing, Jiang Cheng himself drops by Thursday nights after work. He crosses paths with Lan Wangji there, on one such day, a few weeks after the accident. He doesn’t know how someone who always speaks so little can pull off a cold shoulder so well, but Lan Wangji does easily.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean for him to get hurt,” Jiang Cheng says, after ten minutes of staring at Wei Wuxian’s gently rising and falling chest.
Sharp golden eyes glare at him, and before Jiang Cheng can try to defend himself, Lan Wangji says, “You hurt him before that.”
“I… I guess I did. I was angry.” It all seems so trivial, now. But Jiang Cheng had felt betrayed when Wei Wuxian quit his job and moved out without a word. When he’d called him up, furious, Wei Wuxian had just said, ‘I can’t do this anymore, Jiang Cheng,’ and Jiang Cheng had heard, ‘I don’t need you anymore.’
“We were going to come together, but Brother was late. Wei Wuxian left without us so he could see you sooner. Asked Yanli-jie not to let you know he’s coming, because you’ve been avoiding everywhere you thought he’d be. There was no trip to Japan.”
Oh.
“I’m sorry, Lan Wangji. Wei Wuxian, you idiot. I’m not angry anymore. Please wake up.”
*
Because his brother is a pain, and narratives aren’t perfect, it’s still eight weeks after that that Wei Wuxian finally wakes up from his coma. They’re told not to crowd him, that it’s not the same as waking up from a long sleep. There are tests to run, and they’re careful not overwhelm him, with sounds or light or anything but the blandest food.
It’s fine though, Jiang Cheng slips inside to see him when it’s his turn, speaks quietly to his brother about him, “Taking long enough, you couldn’t hurry up a little?” and listens to the complaints about the congee he’s been allowed.
He bounces back quickly though, and a week later, Jiang Cheng brings him some soup from Shijie. It’s not The Soup, the doctors wouldn’t let him have that yet, but Wei Wuxian still nearly cries over the taste of it.
“I’m really sorry, Wei Wuxian,” says Jiang Cheng.
“Hmm?”
“For trying to use Jin Zixuan’s dog to scare you. I broke my promise.”
“It’s fine,” he says, sipping at the last of his soup. Jiang Cheng gives him some of his own. “I broke my promise first.”
“That’s not an excuse.”
“It’s not. But it’s a reason. I saw your face that day. You looked terrified.”
Jiang Cheng scoffs. “Your memory was like a colander even before you crashed skull-first onto the road,” he says, making his brother scowl.
“You were scared. It’s okay, I was scared too.”
Jiang Cheng wants to change the subject. Wants to threaten to break Wei Wuxian’s legs if he doesn’t shut up. But Jiang Cheng has been saying that for so long, it’s become filler. It means nothing. If he’d used real words, earlier, maybe they wouldn’t have fallen out the way they did. Maybe Wei Wuxian would have come to him, instead of quitting and vanishing into the night. “You could’ve died, and the last things we said to each other would have been so hateful. You’d never- you’d be gone, and I could never say anything to you again, and it would be…” unimaginably lonely.
“I didn’t die. I’ll be out and annoying you in no time,” says Wei Wuxian.
Jiang Cheng just nods. His throat is too tight to say anything else.
“Aw, Jiang Cheng, don’t cry. I’m fine, see?”
When Wei Wuxian opens his arms for a hug, Jiang Cheng falls into it without complaint.
“I’ve been a shitty younger brother for a while,” he says softly into Wei Wuxian’s thin cotton shirt.
“We’ve both been pretty awful. I’m sorry if I hurt you when I fled the firm. I just couldn’t take the hypocrisy anymore. I didn’t want you to feel like I abandoned you. I just didn’t want to pressure you to leave. You liked it there.”
“You fled the firm, and the city. You still should have let me choose,” says Jiang Cheng.
“I’m sorry.”
“I forgave you for that a long while ago,” Jiang Cheng admits. “I knew that you hated it there. It was only a matter of time before you fled. I just wish you’d told me.”
“Me too,” says Wei Wuxian.
“I’m sorry, too. For not being supportive when you joined the DA’s office, and for what I did on Jin Ling’s birthday,” he says.
“Enough groveling,” says Wei Wuxian, finally letting go and patting Jiang Cheng on the shoulder. “All is forgiven.”
“Yeah?” he can’t help but ask again. He needs to be sure. He really messed up this time.
“Yes,” says Wei Wuxian.