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Every year when the day came and went she unfolded the letter left by the members in her family. A tearful wave of nostalgia reminded her of a simpler time when her mother would affectionately address her as ‘Connie’ or when her father would gift her with a shiny new arithmetic textbook or perhaps when her brother bought her exclusive tickets to the trendiest opera in Enbarr. Every year she wondered – how could the hairband her mother gave her on her fourteenth birthday be the last piece of item to remind her of cherished time? How was it that the Bolting tome was the last item her father gave? Or perhaps, how was the Levin Sword that she had sheathed on her side the only item keeping the tethering memories of her brother alive?
Firmly, she grasped the ring in her hand as she remembered her mother fumbling and tumbling on her feet at the sound of the horn that day. As a child, she marvelled at the ring, asked her mother regarding the tales that the ring beheld. Her mother always spoke with restraint but with a reverent love towards her father. Constance had always thought of the ring as a symbol of their love – it was a love story she believed to be so grand that all the romances in the opera would only pale in comparison. Now, it was a reminder of a love that she never thought to seek out and yet, when she gazed out upon the pastel skies of the sunset from the tinted windows, she remembered the name of her lover mesmerized her, that took her breath away.
As a Nuvelle, she was lead to believe that love would only exist in the forms of respect and reverence – nothing less but nothing more. Yet, she revered Edelgard but the flames of passion burned brightly between them… her heart fluttered in her presence, her words stumbled upon any unexpected praises.
“There you are. We’ve been looking for you,” chimed Yuri’s voice as Constance turned around to face the man with a conniving smile on his lips.
“Y-Yuri! Must you always surprise me like this? The least you could do is to announce your presence!” Constance chided and at her dismay, his smile only grew.
“C’mon shady lady, we got something for you.” He chuckled.
“Yuri! I’ve told you I’m – you what?” Her voice faltered from the surprise. There was a look of scepticism that coloured her features. She knew Yuri and he was downright conniving and deceptive from moments – how could she be so sure that this was not an elaborate lie?
“I’ll say it again – we got a surprise for you. Come now, we don’t have all day,” he repeated as he reached a hand out to her.
“I…I don’t like the feeling of this…” she said but her hands reached for his anyways. Upon contact he grinned, and Constance felt an instant sense of regret well up within the pit of her stomach.
Yuri dragged her across the grounds from the upper floors of the monastery, down the stairs, around the poles, through the dining hall, and across the fields – whilst he did not appear to be winded at all, she, was running out of breath as her palms sweat and her feet started to give out; but Yuri did not cave and eventually she shook his vice grip loose.
“Yuri! S-Slow down! How do you expect me to keep up with you – how inconsiderate!” Constance huffed and he simply laughed at her. “Are you making a mockery out of my suffering?!”
“Jeez Coco, you really kept us all waiting,” interrupted Hapi’s voice as Balthus followed closely behind them.
“Hapi! My dear Hapi could you please tell me what in the blazes is going on?” Constance drew her attention away from Yuri quickly.
“Jeez a ‘hello’ would’ve been nice, Constance,” Balthus pouted.
“Well, what did Yuri tell you?” Hapi inquired calmly, canting her head to one side inquisitively.
“Nothing! If nobody answers my demands soon I will be cross!” Constance declared.
Yuri and Hapi only allowed a restrained smile onto their lips whilst Balthus shuddered and chuckled nervously at the thought.
“You’ll see. Let’s just say… we have a surprise for you,” Hapi responded and Constance’s look did not look any more relieved. However, this is Hapi – she would not subject her to any pranks that seek to humiliate her in the faces of other people or rather, in a public space.
Still, Constance followed. The walked under the archway as the sun set fully and dusk was brought to the skies behind them. There was an awkward break of silence and she could not help but to wonder what could be of such importance during the time of war?
Perhaps, she had an inkling – yet, to think of this as a celebration of her birthday would be self-conceited. It was a time of war after all and resources are scarce – what merit would it bring to produce grandiose celebrations as such?
Balthus pushed opened the doors and into the dark room they walked. No lights, only the comfort of darkness swathed her until –
Rows of candles began to light up out of their own accord: from the east wing to the west, they lit up individually in hues of the rainbow. Flowers adorned the walls, as the florals flourished upon the vines that grew against the wall. Her eyes gazed at the scenery in awe, following the flames until they reached the centre of the room before burning down an old banner before her to only reveal her names in flashy calligraphy writings with and Constance audibly gasped at the shimmering that came with the flames until Yuri snuffed it out with a spell. Then came Hapi with a garland of flowers made from the flowers in the greenhouse before placing it on the crown of Constance’s head.
“Happy birthday Coco. We Know this isn’t much but… we haven’t properly celebrated your birthday since we started living in Abyss together and now… well, we have more resources and support we thought we would—”
“Oh Hapi! I – You did this for me?!” Shock shook through her core. Her cheeks were flushed at the sight before them. Moved by the gesture, tears began brimming up at the corner of her eyes.
“Hey we—”
“And we’re glad you like it, Constance. Moved are we? It’s alright. You can shed a tear or two, it is your birthday after all,” Yuri interrupted Balthus’ protest.
He strutted down the aisles of the floors before clapping, causing the chandelier of lights to fade into brightness. Slowly, the sound of music emerged from the corners – as if somehow they had the funds to gather an orchestra, but it was just Ferdinand playing on the grand piano and Dorothea letting her sweet voice echo through the ballroom.
Constance was utterly awestruck at the sight before her. Hands covering her mouth, her mouth agape as a gasp audibly escaped her lips. Yuri, Hapi, and Balthus all stood before her grinning proudly at their achievement and Constance stood at a distance, overwhelmed by the sheer amount of care they placed into this celebration for her.
Even though on the surface she acted as if she was the centre of the world, her glamour was a mask to shield the insecure and guilty heart that beat within her chest. Never would she thought to find a group as loyal to her as the Ashen Wolves. They knew her. They knew all the parts that she hated. They’ve seen her at her worst and they never once shunned her despite her efforts to distance herself from the people of Abyss. Ever since the fall of her house Constance built walls around herself, walls that sprung higher than the Oghma Mountains, bricks stronger than the stones that built the Holy Tomb; but they came into her life and chipped away at her defences… and much to her disdain, she slowly let them into her heart.
“I…” Constance trailed off, still rendered speechless by the gesture.
And Yuri stood there smugly, proud of watching the ever so rambunctious Constance von Nuvelle rendered into a state of silence.
She felt tears threaten to escape but she shook her head, denying them exit. Then, with her arms out stretched she pulled the three of them into a tight embrace – catching all of them off guard as they grimaced and stumbled into place.
“Thank you… thank you for everything,” Constance choked back her tears as her embrace tightens one last time before she let go of her vice grip. “Now, I am rather famished – of course I would not expect a lavish meal or the likes—”
“Well, I know I’m no chef but I did manage to get my hands on a few ingredients for your favourite dishes,” Yuri chuckled. “The dining hall staff will bring the food over shortly. Don’t want the food to go cold now do we?”
“That’s very thoughtful of you, Yuri. I can’t say I’m surprised,” she spoke earnestly. “Now – who wishes to dance with me? We are in a ballroom after all, ahaha!”
“Er… I’m pretty sure her majesty wouldn’t be happy if she saw you dancing with someone else…” Balthus scratched the back of his head sheepishly.
“But, her majesty is not currently present, thusly, I must find a lesser substitute!” Constance retorted and Balthus only grimaced with a sheepish smile on his face.
“Hm, I suppose if I was one moment later you would’ve been in the arms of another it seems,” chimed Edelgard’s voice and in that instance, Constance almost lost her composure before she did a dramatic turn on her heels to meet the other woman’s eyes.
“Well, I wouldn’t exactly expect an emperor to take time out of her busy day for something considered less than—”
“Now, I’m going to ask you to hold your tongue. You have been a tremendous aid to my campaign. A celebration of your existence is not unimportant,” Edelgard smiled softly. An outstretched hand, awaiting for Constance to take it. “Now, may I have the pleasure of dancing with the lady of the night?”
Constance took her hand as Edelgard took the lead. Their footsteps synched as they spun and traversed the dancefloor. Dorothea grinned and Ferdinand smiled so brightly that the sun pales in his comparison. Yuri’s frame laxed as Hapi stretched her arms. For a single moment, the throttle and tensions of the war was pushed aside as Mercedes brought in the cake she made for Constance’s birthday. The levity of the night carried them away and within the safe embrace of the Ashen Wolves and Edelgard, for once, Constance felt the insecurities within herself melt away.
Dear Mother, Father, and Brother,
As another year passes and I age without your presence, I could only say that I have never stopped missing you. I remember the tears that were shed that day as you sent me away, mother; I remember the pain in your eyes when you gave me your tome, father; I remember the radiant smile on your lips as you reassured me that everything will be fine, brother. I know you feared for my wellbeing and the immense guilt you felt for leaving me living on my own. Perhaps it was youthful, bashful, or even ungrateful of me to have thought: but I too, harboured resentment towards your deaths, and my life. For many years I wandered alone, wandering to Fhirdiad, then to the Oghma Mountains. It was a solitary and arduous road I walked but… I think I have found my roots.
Therefore, you need not worry for me. I am well, I am alive, and I will restore our house when the day comes… once I have, your souls can finally rest in peace. Until then, I will miss you dearly; I will keep you in my memory.
Until we meet again.
With Love,
Constance von Nuvelle