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"oh my god, you're in love with him," jisung said, looking at chan with wide eyes.
"i am not in love with him," chan answered quickly, shooting jisung a glare. "and be quiet, he's literally across the room."
the room they were in wasn't small, and he knew there was no way minho could hear them all the way over here, especially with all the people talking and the music playing, but he didn't feel like taking chances.
a party wasn't really his ideal location to have this conversation in the first place, really, but lord only knew once jisung got started on something it was nearly impossible to derail him.
"funny, i didn't even say a name and yet somehow you know who i'm talking about," jisung grinned, poking chan on the arm. "and you totally are. a couple months ago when changbin wanted to write a love song you jumped on it so fast, which is weird for you because you're all about those loud hype songs. and we were like 'do you think you can handle writing a love song, hyung, the only thing you've ever been in love with in your computer' and you were like 'ive been in love before im capable of writing a love song' and we totally didn't believe you. but we should've because you actually are capable of writing love songs because you're in love with minho hyung."
jisung wasn't dumb, at all. chan would even go as far as to say that he was actually very smart. which was both a blessing and a curse. a blessing because he was an absolute genius when it came to making music, and chan would forever be in complete awe at some of the things he could come up with. jisung was someone he was beyond proud to have as a part of his team. a curse because it was also very easy to forget that jisung is as smart as he is. he really plays down his intelligence and makes you completely forget how smart and perceptive he can be, when he wants to, so it always hits hard when hammers out the truth with hard to deny facts.
"writing a love song does not mean im in love with minho," he answered, slumping in his head and moved to lean slightly against jisung, feeling defeated already. jisung wasn't someone chan could easily hide from.
"no, but all the staring when you think he's not looking, and the way you constantly talk about him to everyone, and the way you two act like you've been married for forty years does," jisung said, rolling his eyes. "don't know why you're trying to deny it."
"im hoping maybe if i ignore it enough it'll go away."
"so, you admit it then? you're in love with minho hyung?" jisung asked, looking way too excited.
"might as well. you clearly already know and it's not like i can ever keep things from you," chan rolled his eyes at the way jisung was preening from his words. "you better not tell anyone."
"who have i got to tell?"
"literally so many people."
"whatever. are you ever going to tell him?" jisung asked, features softening into something a little more serious.
"probably not. not like anything good will come out of it," chan shrugged, leaning even more of his weight onto jisung.
"what's the worst that could happen? he says no?"
"he says no and then never speaks to me and then the group dynamics are ruined because i couldn't get over a crush," chan said.
"you're way too hard on yourself, hyung. do you really think minho hyung is the type to react like that? even if he did say no you know he'll still be your friend," jisung said, patting chan's thigh in comfort.
"even if he was it'd be awkward."
"friendship with minho hyung is already awkward, how much worse can it get?" jisung jokes, looking across the room to watch minho, along with jeongin, bully changbin.
"he's literally your best friend."
"and? i don't understand him at all sometimes. that's just how he is. he's weird and awkward as it is so not much would really change if he turned you down," jisung shrugged. "you know he'd be the sweetest about it, accepting or denying the confession, so what's the point of avoiding it. not like you'll lose anything by doing it. things either stay the same and you get closure or you'll gain something."
"i really hate it when you make sense," chan groaned, but couldn't stop the smile spreading across his face. he was really happy that he could call jisung a friend, his best friend.
"most people do," jisung nodded, not looking at all bothered by the statement.
it had been him and jisung against the world for a while before each of the other boys eventually joined them, and the younger knew chan better than anyone. jisung knew him better than he even knew himself. chan trusted jisungs judgement immensely and knew he'd never purposely lead him wrong, but he still felt nervous about the idea of confessing to minho and getting rejected.
he knew jisung was right. knew that no matter what they outcome of his confession was that minho would be as sweet and accommodating as he could. while it definitely did make him feel a lot better about that thought of confessing, it wasn't enough to completely sooth his nerves.
"do you really think i should, confess?" chan asked, pulling away from jisung's side so that he could actually look at him.
"absolutely," jisung grinned, nodding once.
"okay…"
"you got this, man," jisung said in english, making a fist and holding it out for chan. he didn't hesitate to curl his own hand into a fist and bump it against his younger friends. "now, get over there and do it before you lose your nerve."
"what? right now?" chan asked, eyes wide as he glanced in minho's direction.
"yup! im going to go bother felix because he looks a little lost trying to talk to… whoever that is," jisung smiled, standing up and walking away without giving chan the chance to say another word.
as much as he knew that jisung was right, that he really should go talk to minho and confess before he truly let his anxiety get the better of him. he was just having a little trouble getting his legs to work. and his brain.
chan sat for a few more moments, eyes closed and head tilted back trying to will himself the energy and courage to actually go through with the confession. once he opened his eyes he caught jisung's gaze from across the room, the younger giving him a wink and a thumbs up before going back to talking to felix.
and that, apparently, was the last little push he needed.
he stood up and slowly made his way over to where minho, changbin, and jeongin seemed to be playing some kind of card game. he wasn't sure where they managed to get the cards from, but he wasn't about to complain since it meant they weren't doing anything they needed supervision for.
jeongin noticed him first, waving him over and patting the empty seat next to him on the couch. never being able to deny their youngest anything, chan easily settled down next to him, now squished between him and minho. which, was really in his favor, so he wasn't complaining.
"did you wanna join the game, hyung? were playing go fish, we just started a new round because changbin hyung was cheating," jeongin asked, reaching out like he was about to deal
him in if he said yes, not even blinking at changbin's loud protests.
"ah, no. i just came over here for some company since jisungie ditched me for felix," chan shook his head. "thanks though."
"typical. they better get over themselves soon, im tired of watching them pine," changbin said, looking like he was actually in pain. "yesterday i had to sit through them quoting that 'i love you bitch' vine back and forth to each other for like an hour."
"fingers crossed. jisungie is smart, but he's a little dumb when it comes to himself," minho giggled, and chan felt like his chest was on fire.
"like you can talk," changbin mumbled, minho not hesitating to elbow him in response. chan didn't really want to think too hard about what changbin could have met.
either way, the words left minho pouting with his arms crossed and slumped into the couch, his right leg starting to press into chan's left. chan, without letting himself think about it and talk himself out of it, let his hand fall down to pat minho's thigh a few times for comfort and leaving it to rest there afterwards. his hand fell just a little too high on his leg to be totally just friendly and he felt minho tense for a second before relaxing.
the three of them got back into their card game and chan was content enough to just sit and watch, hand unmoving from minho's leg. eventually he started to relax into the contact and began drawing little shapes and patterns onto minho's thigh with his finger. really, this kind of contact wasn't all that unusual. all of them were extremely touchy with each other, it'd be rare to see them not touching each other at all. jisung constantly asking them for kisses, hyunjin trying to leech himself onto anyone within a one foot radius, felix always having hold of one of their hands. they were a touchy group, so chan getting the slightest bit handsy with minho wasn't totally out of the realm of possibility.
there was always something a little different about the two of them being touchy, and chan couldn't really tell if that was just wishful thinking or not because he wanted the touches to mean as much to minho as they did to him. sometimes, though, he thought minho felt it too. when he'd lean into chan's side during movie night and get this small, almost secret smile when chan would cave and wrap an arm around his shoulders, or when he'd purposely seek out chan's hand to hold even though one of the other boys was already offering one of their own.
he didn't want to get his hopes up, but the longer he thought about confessing, especially after jisung's pep talk, he couldn't really help himself.
he didn't even notice when their game of go fish ended until jeongin was poking him in the arm and asking if he wanted to play this time.
it was now or never, he figured.
"actually, i was hoping to steal minho for a minute…" he said nervously, finally lifting his hand off the younger's leg.
"oh? alright. i hope it's for something more fun than go fish," minho shrugged.
"i'm hoping it will be," chan joked.
"you're only having a bad time because you keep losing," jeongin said, rolling his eyes as chan stood up.
"you and changbin are both cheaters, it's my fault i'm losing," minho mumbled standing up next to chan and let the older start leading him away from the small group and towards the door to the backyard. he took them over to a bench swing and sat down, clasping his hands together in his lap and shifting his gaze to the ground, feeling minho take a seat next to him.
"this feels serious," minho said, lighting pushing with his legs to make the swing start swaying. "are you dying?"
"what? no, i'm not dying," chan shook his head. "it is… a little serious, though. maybe not. i don't know, depends on you, i guess."
"not dying, but something maybe serious? hmm…" minho said softly, and from the corner of his eyes he saw him lift a hand up to tap his thumb against his chin. "can i guess?"
"i guess?" chan answered, the words sounding more like a question than he had intended. he lifted his head up to look at minho and found him looking back at him already with a soft, amused smile.
"fun! are you abandoning us to go join the circus?"
chan could only shake his head in response, but he felt a lot more at ease with minho trying to lighten the mood.
"damn, i was hoping for free tickets."
"you'd get discounted tickets, at best."
"i'd take it," minho shrugged. "are you fleeing the country to move back to australia because the pain of missing your dog has just become too much to handle? because i wouldn't blame you. i'd do the same thing for my kids."
"i do miss berry, but i'm not going anywhere," chan laughed, shaking his head.
"that's good…" minho hummed, looking at chan and tilting his head. "i guess there's only one other option. you must be confessing your love to me."
chan froze, eyes blown wide open.
that was what he came out here to do, knew the conversation they were about to have, but having it out in the open like this was nothing short of terrifying. and what made it worse was the fact that he couldn't for the life of him yet his mouth to start working. all he could do was sit and stare at minho in horrified shock.
"oh god. you are, aren't you?" minho asked, his own eyes widening.
"im sorry," chan whispered.
"no, oh my god, dont be sorry. im sorry. please continue," minho rambled, hands held out in front of him.
if chan weren't panicking so much, he'd say that minho looked almost eager to hear the confession.
"i… may or may not have a kind of major crush on you…" chan mumbled, looking away from minho and to the tree behind him.
"really? and you're not joking, right?" minho asked, looking both relieved and worried at the same time.
"why would i be joking?"
"because you figured out that ive been in love with you for years and didn't know how else to let me down?"
"no, why would i - wait, what? you're in love with me?" chan asked, eyes snapping back to look into minho's own.
"yes. i thought it was kind of obvious. jisung keeps telling me im not subtle at all," minho said, smiling and looking just a tad embarrassed.
and suddenly chan wanted to go over and examine every single interaction he'd had with minho over the last few years, to find proof of his words himself. and really, he figured it did make sense. he felt a lot better knowing that he hadnt just been tricking himself into seeing things that weren't there.
he reached one of his hands out towards one of minho's own, silently asking if he was allowed to touch him. when he got the tiny nod of approval from minho, he closed the gap between their hands, pressing their palms together and lacing their fingers.
"i, um, love you too. if that wasn't, you know, obvious," chan said softly, smiling at the younger, his whole body sagging in relief at the gentle squeeze to his hand.
"yeah, i got the memo," minho giggled, and chan swears he's never been more in love.
he was going to write so many more love songs, he didn't care if changbin and jisung made fun of him.
"so… what now?" chan asked.
"you're not very good at this kind of stuff are you?" minho teased him, leaning in close to his face.
"shut up, the only person i ever dated was this girl in middle school. i don't know what i'm doing," chan defended, trying to lean back and away from minho's face.
and that was the truth too. he'd dated a girl in middle school before she broke it off because he payed too much attention to jisung and not enough to her. he didn't really have an interest in dating after that, not that he was overly interested when he dated her either. and he stayed disinterested until he'd met minho.
"ew, a het."
"im not a het, i literally just told you i was in love with you," chan rolled his eyes, feeling delighted at the way minho just giggled at his words. "you spend too much time with jisung and felix."
"how do you know it's not them spending too much time with me?" minho asked.
"because i've known jisung and felix longer than i've known you and they've, unfortunately, been this way since the beginning. you do have a point though, you three all spend too much time together."
"you say that you're not just as weird as the rest of us," minho said, rolling his eyes. "and don't even try to deny it, because I, and everyone else, have been gathering proof. jisung and changbin are big contributors."
"it be ya own, huh?" chan sighed. "i at least have to pretend to be sane. i'm like your guy's father."
"please don't say you're my father when we just confessed to being in love with each other. i'm not really into that, so if you are, i'm gonna break up with you right now."
"you can't break up with me if we're not dating."
"hm, yeah, that is a problem," minho sighed, blinking innocently at chan. "you should really do something about that."
"are you going to break up with me if i do?" chan asked, biting back a smile.
"depends, are you gonna keep calling yourself my father?"
"absolutely not."
"then no break ups necessary," minho smiled, "now ask me out already."
chan couldn't stop the smile spreading across his face at this point. he came into the situation expecting the worst, but ending up getting the best. it seemed minho was in a similar state. despite the cool, calm front minho always seemed to try to push to have, he couldn't control his smile either, though his was coupled with quiet giggles that made chan's heart feel like it was malfunctioning.
"lee minho," chan said seriously, shifting to face minho more fully, reaching out with his free hand to take minho's other hand into his own as well. "will you be my boyfriend?"
"yes," minho answered quietly, nodding and squeezing chan's hands.
"HE SAID YES!" they heard a voice, turning their heads to jisung standing up from behind a bush, felix popping out seconds later to shout out, "NOW KISS!"
"you two are grounded!" chan yelled back.
"YOU'RE NOT MY DAD, UGLY ASS NOODLE HEAD," felix yelled, disappearing with jisung back behind the bush.
if chan knew that this was what it was like to have kids, he would've never adopted so many of them. but even he knew he was lying, no matter how crazy they drove him, he wouldn't trade his boys for anything.
"well, you heard them," minho smirked, leaning his face back towards chan's, eyes flicking between his eyes and his lips, silently asking permission. he didn't waste a second give the younger a nod before moving to close the distance between them himself, slotting their lips together in a sweet kiss.
yeah, he'd definitely be writing more love songs after this.