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There is laughter and overly familiar touches. Alpha and omega are in the same room once more, and she scowls, her fingernails digging into her palm. A nameless thing is overwhelming all other thoughts in her mind, and she loathes it- loathes them for making her feel things she cannot figure out.
The focus of her ire is a (genuine) omega named Dolores Frazier. She has colorful eyes and a big smile (sans fangs and blood dripping down her chin). Dot radiates a confidence that she will never be able to, no matter how hard she wants to. Dot is animated as she talks to Bucky, her lengthy hair shaking whenever she laughs at a joke that Bucky tells. She picks up a strand of her own hair, frizzy and dull, and glares at it. She’s noticed that Bucky is animated as he talks, more animated than he has ever been talking to his wife. His hands fly around his body as he tells a grossly exaggerated story. The two wolves have been talking for precisely an hour and thirty-two minutes, not that anyone is counting.
Dolores Frazier is Bucky and Steve’s friend from home. And Bucky’s ex.
When Bucky and Steve found out that Dot would be on this side of the country, the two had planned a party to welcome her. Bucky had cleaned the house, and Steve dug a firepit. Then when Dot had wandered in, Bucky had lit up like a Yule log. The bright smile on his face has yet to dim. Bucky is laughing at something Dot is showing him on her phone, and she removes her nails from the couch cushion before she punctures it.
She turns from the scene to run outside. She flops next to Wanda when she gets there, burying her head in Wanda’s leg with a huff. Natasha sits above them and sips at her drink, contemplating the distance. Wanda tugs a strand of her friend’s hair to get her attention.
“Are you okay?” Wanda asks.
“All I’ve heard the past three days is, "Hey, didja know that Dot’s a nurse?” she says in her best Bucky impression. “And "Ha, lookit this picture Dot sent of the two of us back in high school!” Gods-damn Dot this, fucking Dot that, oh, it’s all about fucking Dot lately, and I am sick of it!“ she cries.
"Uh,” says Wanda. “Okay, there is a lot to unpack there.”
“There is nothing to unpack, Wan; I just wish he’d shut up about Dolores fucking Frazier!”
Wanda says, “I’ve never heard you swear so much.”
“How about a drink?” Natasha asks.
“Yes, please.”
She slams the drink down, not caring what it is. She grimaces as she swallows. Once the last drop is gone, she rears back and hurls the glass into a tree.
“Another?” says Natasha.
“She doesn’t do well with alcohol, Nat,” Wanda says.
“It’s fine, Wan! I’m an adult!” she yells.
“Barnes certainly has a type, doesn’t he?” quips Natasha, offering a second glass of vodka.
“What the fuck is that supposed to mean? We’re nothing alike. She isn’t fucking dead. She looks like a real fucking omega,” she says bitterly.
She goes to throw the second empty glass, but Wanda plucks it from her fingertips before she can. She scowls, looking intimidating, but Wanda merely stares back, tilting her head. Wanda’s eyes flash scarlet for just a moment, and she drops her gaze.
“I’m sorry,” she mutters, mollified. “I don’t know where any of that came from.”
Wanda says, “He’s your alpha. I’d be surprised if you weren’t upset.”
“Why does it feel like this? I’m not a wolf.”
“No, you aren’t. But you love him. That has nothing to do with alphas, omegas, and bonding.”
She sighs. “You’re right. Gods-damn it.”
“Bucky loves you,” Natasha adds. “He never came close to loving Dot. Truthfully, I don’t know if he likes her all that much.”
“You could have fucking fooled me, what with how he looked at her,” she says.
“How did he look at her?” Natasha asks.
“I don’t know, like he-”
But Nat cuts her off.
“No, he didn’t.”
“How do you know? Were you watching?” she asks.
“No, I wasn’t because I see how he looks at you. That is everything I need to know about the situation.”
“They weren’t good, you know,” Wanda says. “They fought a lot.”
“He told you that?”
“No, but Steve did. They were "heat slash rut partners.” They weren’t actually together. I think Bucky’s just happy to see someone from home. Dot’s really friendly with Bucky’s sisters.“
"He does miss them. It is my fault his mother doesn’t want to see him,” she muses. “Maybe if he got with Dot again, she’d let him visit.”
Nat rolls her eyes so hard that wolves from the next county can probably hear it.
“Don’t do that.”
“What? It’s true.”
“It isn’t your fault Bucky’s stepfather is a judgmental asshole.”
“Yeah, but I’ve never seen him talk to someone as long as he’s talked to Dot.”
“When he first met you, he never stopped talking about you. Hell, he FaceTimed you during a pack trip. He shifted back, and we couldn’t find him for two hours. So, don’t do this to yourself,” says Natasha, though she says it kinder than last time.
“I forgot about that.”
“Remember when you went off on that tangent about 18th century British literature, Bucky was the only one who listened to the whole thing? And he contributed to the discussion. He never would have read Voltaire before he met you. He’s always talking to and about you,” Wanda adds.
“You’re right. I forgot about that, too,” she replies.
“We’ve known him and Steve for almost fifteen years now. I’ve never seen him so in love,” says Natasha.
“Thank you.”
She is trying to feel better, but the longer she’s away from Bucky and Dolores, the more the nameless thing grows. She pictures Bucky and Dolores laughing at how ridiculous she is for thinking Bucky would be happy with a vampire and not a real omega wolf. She wants to cry and swallows past a lump in her throat. Wanda rubs her back. She lies on Wanda’s shoulder, swiping at her eyes to stop the tears.
“Hey, there you are,” says a voice. “Been lookin’ for ya everywhere.”
“Here I am,” she answers.
“Are you okay?”
“Yeah,” she says, rubbing her eye, “What’s up?”
“There’s someone I want you to meet.”
“I don’t know if that’s a good…” Wanda trails off. “Never mind.”
“Oh.” She gets to her feet. “Okay, sure.”
“Dot?” Bucky says.
Dolores Frazier appears behind Bucky’s back with a pretty grin, sans fangs and blood. Dot holds out her hand, but she doesn’t take it. Instead, she takes a step back, not noticing how Bucky’s eyebrows furrow.
“Steve an’ I have known Dot since we were young. Dot is Bec’s best friend, so, by extension, she’s our friend,” says Bucky.
“That's… Wonderful,” she says, trying to sound enthusiastic but failing utterly.
“It’s so nice to meet you!” Dot enthuses. “Bucky has told me so much about you.”
“I’ll bet he has,” she says. “Mhm, yep.”
Bucky narrows his eyes at his omega, catching onto her tone of voice but wondering why she is acting this way. Dot, blissfully unaware, continues grinning.
“Yeah, he never seems to shut up about you,” she says while winding her arm through Bucky’s arm, “I’m just so happy that he’s found you! He was always so sad back home. Right, Buck?”
Dolores Frazier looks up at Bucky with her pretty bright eyes. Bucky flashes her a smile, and Dot squeezes Bucky’s arm. Before stopping herself, she snarls, baring her teeth at Dot, who startles at the noise and jumps behind Bucky like he is her alpha. She’s seeking his protection from the big evil vampire. She covers her fangs with her hand and runs into the woods before fully realizing what she’s doing.
She hops into the tallest tree that she sees, scrambling up the trunk and clinging to it. Bloody tears begin streaming down her face as she digs her nails into the tree’s bark and scraps down. She can see it clearer now, sees Dot and Bucky in bed together, blue eyes matched with blue eyes. Nothing colorless or bloody or dead about Dolores Frazier. It’s alpha paired with omega. It’s Dolores Frazier in a white wedding dress walking towards an elated Bucky. It’s Dot and Bucky being surrounded by seven pups, all a perfect mix of the two of them, just like Bucky wanted. Dot and Bucky would live in a big house with a big library and an oversized shower. Oh, how could she think this would ever last? Of course, Bucky wants a genuine omega! It’s every alpha’s dream to have pups!
She hears Bucky before she sees him. He’s followed her and is making his way up the tree to her. She debates jumping off, but he spots her before she can make a break for it.
“Wanna tell me what that was?” he asks.
“Not fucking particularly,” she says.
“Dot just wanted to meet you, an’ you growled at her.”
“Is that all she wanted to do? Fucking really?”
“What is that ‘sposed to mean?”
“I don’t fucking know, okay?” she says, running a hand through her hair. “Just go back to Dot. It’s fuckin’ fine. She’s missing you.”
Bucky sighs. “What?”
“Nothing, it’s fine. Go away.”
“I ain’t leavin’ until you tell me what’s goin’ on with you.”
“Nothing’s wrong, okay? Go back to Dot, mate with her, marry her, and have the perfect fucking 'wolfy’ family you’ve always dreamed of.”
She huffs, embarrassed that she’s crying and making a scene over something as stupid as this. Bucky is staring at her with narrowed eyes until something clicks in his head. He nods decisively.
“I see,” Bucky says. “You’re jealous.”
“No!” she cries. “I’m not!”
“I think you are.”
“No, I’m not! That would be insane!”
“Sunshine, look at me. Why’re ya cryin’, huh?”
“Because she’s fucking perfect for you, don’t you see it? She’s a gods-damn real omega. You talked to her for over two hours without looking at me, cleaned the house just for her, haven’t shut up about her for days, used to date, and you’re still in love with her!”
Bucky laughs at her. She scowls.
“What the fuck is so funny?”
“I’ve just never heard you swear so much. An’ I never loved her,” Bucky says serenely. “Baby, look at me, please. Thank you. Listen, Dot an’ I never dated. We just hooked up.”
“Right. Like that makes it better.”
Bucky continues like she hadn’t spoken, though he takes her hand and kisses her palm.
“Never bit her. Never knotted her. Was never in love. We never wanted anythin’ from each other.”
“But she’s your perfect match!” she cries.
Bucky snorts, shaking his head.
“She’s my friend, nothin’ more. An’ even that’s a stretch. She’s more Becca’s friend than mine, really. Even Steve liked her more.”
“Then why did you guys hook up in the first place?”
“Ruts an’ heats are awful when you’re young an’ not used to it- feels like you’re bein’ ripped apart from the inside. It’s easier to be with someone than do it alone. An’ Dot an’ I knew each other already, so we thought why not? Better than it bein’ a stranger or offin’ ourselves because of the pain.”
“I guess so.”
“An’ that whole time I was talkin’ with Dot just now, it was about her life an’ her alpha-”
“Right, so, once she moved on from you, you settled for me?”
“No, you an’ I met ages before she met her mate.”
“So, she settled?”
“No, honey, gods-damn, listen to me, please. He is the love of her life, an’ you’re mine. Dot and I spent the whole time talkin’ about you both. I kept lookin’ over at you. You would have noticed if you hadn’t been glarin’ at the couch.”
She exhales heavily, her teeth sinking into her bottom lip. She feels embarrassed all over again.
“Yeah, I noticed you,” she admits grudgingly.
“Yeah. I was just excited to see someone from my hometown, you know? She was tellin’ me about my family an’ everythin’. We even FaceTimed Becca,” says Bucky.
He sounds slightly wistful. She knows Bucky misses his sisters the most out of everyone. When his stepdad had chased him away from the Barnes clan, it was after an explosive fight, and Bucky never really said goodbye.
“Oh,” she says. “Well, you know, maybe if you and Dot were fake-together, you could visit them.”
Bucky squeezes her hands in his.
“If they don’t want to see me if I’m with a vamp, they won’t see me at all. I’m not gonna leave you just to see my biased family. They can go fuck themselves.”
“Bucky, they’re your family.”
“I ran across the country to get away from my stepdad.”
“Buck.”
“I love you. It’s us against the world, remember?”
She replies, “They’re still your family. What if you pretended that Dot and you-”
“Stop,” Bucky says. “C'mere.”
He pulls her into his arms, and she melts, burying her face in his neck. Bucky rubs her back and whispers in her ear.
“It was all wrong. Dot was talkin’, an’ I kept lookin’ over at you. All I wanted was to steal you away into the woods. You and Dot are so different. You are everythin’ she isn’t, which sounds terrible, but that’s me sayin’ that she was never the one for me. She’s for her alpha. You’re the one for me.”
“But Dot’s cute,” she says.
“So’re you. You’re cute as fuck.”
“And she’s only like four feet tall. You can throw her around, no problem.”
“What, like I can’t throw you around?”
She grumps. “Dot doesn’t look like she just crawled eight feet upwards through a mound of dirt. She doesn’t have fangs. ”
“Yer bein’ ridiculous. After my very articulate speech and everythin’. Wolves have fangs, darlin’; you know that.”
“Buck.”
“What? Do you need reassurance? I love your fangs. I told you before they make me hard.”
He kisses her neck until it tickles, and she smiles.
“Crass,” she says.
“But appropriate,” Bucky says. “Also, I’ve never thought you looked like you crawled through the dirt. You’re very clean.”
She laughs.
“Thanks.”
“An’ that. You’re so pretty when you laugh,” says Bucky.
She wraps a strand of his hair around her fingers and pets it while saying:
“Thank you, baby. I’m sorry I was dramatic.”
“So was I with that whole Erik situation. Still don’t like that kid.” Bucky shakes his head. “But it’s called bein’ in love an’ becomin’ a singularity.”
“Well, if I have to be a singularity, I’m glad it’s with you.”
“I’m glad it’s you, too. I fuckin’ love you.”
“Love you, too,” she says.
They stay in the tree for a while, holding onto each other as Bucky purrs at her. She feels better but is still upset that she snarled at Dot. (She probably wouldn’t take it back, though, if she’s honest with herself).
“How bad would it be if we were just to stay out here and forget the party?” she murmurs.
“As much as I wanna, I think we better go back. It’s in our house,” Bucky says.
“I know. It’s just nice being with you up here.”
“Afterwards-” Bucky nuzzles her. “-After everyone leaves, we can go out an’ run for the rest of the night. Steve can clean up. He made half the damn mess, anyway. Now, lemme get you outta this tree, okay?”
“Okay.”
She clings to Bucky as he shifts around to lower them down. She buries her face in his neck and nibbles- marking him with her scent, though Bucky doubts she knows that’s what she’s really doing. A grin spreads across his face as he remembers.
“You better hold on tight-” Bucky starts.
She tugs her face from his neck and makes a frustrated noise.
“Do not finish that sentence, James Buchanan Barnes.”
“-Spider monkey!” Bucky croons.
“Oh, my Gods, shut up. We are never inviting Wanda to our movie nights ever again.”
“You coulda sided with me, an’ we woulda watched Godzilla, but no, you had to be stubborn. Face it; it was all your fault. That dice roll was your idea.”
“Hoisted by my own petard,” she laments, draping herself over Bucky dramatically like a swooning maiden. “I am doomed to eternal suffering because of that poor choice, aren’t I?”
“At least we don’t glitter in the sun,” says Bucky.
“No, our skin just blisters. It’s much less sexy.”
As they reach the ground, Bucky lets go of the tree to kiss his omega on the forehead. He tucks his finger under her chin, raising her eyes to meet his.
“Don’t ever think I’d leave ya for anyone, okay? I won’t leave you for anythin’.”
“Okay.”
“Promise?”
“I promise,” she repeats, kissing him quickly before biting her bottom lip. “I really am sorry. And I’ll tell Dot, too.”
“I accept your apology. An’ you don’t gotta apologize to Dot if you don’t want to. I made it a huge thing when I shouldn’t have. So, I’m sorry. I really am. I didn’t think how much it would hurt you,” Bucky says.
“It’s okay.”
“No, it isn’t, but I’ll try my best to make it better.”
“Thank you.”
She hooks her arm in Bucky’s as they head back to their friends. Everyone is seated around the firepit, and Bucky sits next to Steve, patting his leg. She plants herself in his lap and curls into his chest. Dot is on the other side of them, and she twists herself around to apologize. Dot forgives her graciously when she does, knowing what it feels like when your alpha is preoccupied with another omega. Dot puts her hand on top of the other’s cold one as a gesture of forgiveness. She feels comforted. Maybe they cannot be best friends, but they can be cordial towards each other.
She leans back against Bucky and takes the can of soda that Wanda offers her.