Archive of Our Own

What did it mean being destined for each other? What did it mean being only complete once you have found your soulmate? What did “being complete” even mean?

In a world where everything revolved around searching and finding your destined significant other, those questions were asked the most. Some people would say, it felt like being finally at ease, feeling at home or finding their ultimate meaning of life. Others would say that their world suddenly turned colorful, instead of only being black and white. Well at least the part with the color was somehow true for anyone.

When reaching the age of 18, every human being would receive a gift from some higher power: a monochrome tattoo appearing on a non-specified body part. The form of it was dependent on the deepest desire of each person. It could be something innocent as a flower or heart shapes, or something odd, like a car or a burger. Nevertheless, the purpose of this tattoo was always the same: It only colored up if you had found your soulmate. If that person finally found their way into your life and if the connection was mutual.

This connection did not have to be sexual, or in the cause of reproduction. It was something on another level - another level of comfort and utter bliss. Obviously, many soulmates still shared romantic feelings or intimate relationships. But in general, gender did not matter, only the age was somewhat similar. Which was a good thing because waiting for your soulmate to reach the specific age was really exhausting and nerve-wrecking. Some people saw their sole purpose in finding their significant other. Some others did not. But living without your soulmate would make the rest of your life somewhat dull. Therefore, most of the people searched particularly hard – on websites, on soulmate matching apps or in their daily lives. Only in a very discrete way though – you would not want your soulmate to be grossed out by you, right? And you did not want to be exposed as an “unmatched” – someone without a soulmate – as well. The whole thing was as delicate as it was confusing.

Still, the world worked with this kind of system. Everything was just as fine as it could be…

♫♪♪♫♪♪♫♪♪♫♪♪~

There it was again. This melody. This unknown, yet so familiar melody in the back of his mind.

It made Tamaki’s heart beat faster, his head dizzy and caused his tattoo to tingle with heat. After having this sensation for a couple of months now, Tamaki was one hundred percent sure: it had something to do with his soulmate. All these beautiful tunes flowing through his head were most probably connected to them.

Tamaki ached to know more about these melodies. What was their meaning? What feelings did the person who composed them want to convey? And most importantly, who was responsible for them?

Truthfully speaking, Tamaki was never a huge fan of the whole “finding your soulmate” thing – it required a huge effort, an effort he did not want to contribute. He did never really care about it. At first.

It all changed on the day of his 18th birthday. Tamaki just received his tattoo: two four-leaf clovers, located a bit under his left collarbone. Of course, without any color. Tamaki just shrugged it off, not giving it any more thought. Not that he would start searching for his destined significant other now. Not that he was interested at all.

But the higher force had different plans. Tamaki was just about to eat his birthday pudding, when his ears started to prickle and his body, especially his tattoo to burn up. This was the first time one of these wonderful tunes was stuck in his head all of a sudden. And they would flow through his mind during various time points and occasions ever since. They were in his head after he woke up, while he was doing the chores, meeting with friends and most commonly before he went to sleep. But funnily, Tamaki was not bothered at all, quite the contrary, he even started to hum them out loud or dance to them. Those melodies somehow soothed him or expressed his emotions better than he ever could with his own words. They filled him up, they made him whole, they became a part of him.

That was the reason why Tamaki really wanted to know if these melodies were composed by his soulmate and if yes, what kind of a person they were. He was already sure that they would be a warmhearted, faithful and considerate human being. Someone, who might understand Tamaki without words. Someone, who would accept him the way he is. At least, he liked to imagine that.

Still, the biggest problem remained: How to find them? Where to look for them? Tamaki did neither want to write a notice with “Searching for possible composer soulmate”, nor to publish music that did not belong to him. Tamaki was kind of protective of these melodies. And he was sure that they were precious to the other person as well. Therefore, he wanted to treasure them – which made matters very difficult, but not impossible. Tamaki chose to believe a little bit in fate and in his own stubbornness and endurance. He would find them eventually. He was sure of it.

Until then, Tamaki had to live and enjoy life on his own. Yes, he wanted to find his melody-person, but not with desperation.

He graduated from school, started his pedagogical studies at the university and worked part-time in a music store. Everything worked out just fine, but still he was missing something. Or rather someone.

♫♪♪♫♪♪♫♪♪♫♪♪~

Tamaki was sorting the new CD arrivals into their designated shelves while humming one of the melodies again.

“You’re always smiling when these tunes are stuck in your head.”

A tall person was approaching Tamaki from behind, petting his head with one hand once he had reached him.

“Ban-chan, stop that. ‘m not a child anymore. Don’t cha have some manager work to do – somewhere else?”, Tamaki stopped his humming and gently, yet determinedly, pushed Banri’s hand off his hair.

The manager of this music store was an old friend of Tamaki's family, knowing Tamaki since he was little. Therefore, he had a very particular way of treating him. Much to Tamaki’s discomfort. But still, he was grateful that Banri gave him the opportunity to work part-time in his well-known music shop. Where better to meet a musician than here?

“Yes, Yes, I know. Sorry for that. Any progress on finding your angel of music?”, Banri chuckled, grabbing a nearby piano stool and sat on it – eager to hear some updates. His eyes sparkled with anticipation.

Tamaki flinched back a bit, let out an exasperated sigh and resumed his work, “Nothing new.”

He tried to act all cool, not wanting to show how massively impatient he already was. He really did not want to talk about the stagnant process of his search. Why was it so hard? Why did they not just come through that door like BAM and Tamaki would instantly know that this was his soulmate. Why couldn’t it be like in one of these movies for once?!

And then – without any prior warning and all of a sudden – Tamaki’s façade broke. He ran his fingers through his hair in annoyance, letting out a disgruntled noise.

“Ban-chaaaaaaaan, this ‘s not fair. Wanna meet them so bad. Why can’t they just appear---”

A loud ringing sound interrupted Tamaki though – it was the front door’s bell. Someone had entered the shop.

Tamaki stopped his complaining and shared one short, hopeful eye contact with Banri in silence, before they heard a small voice.

“Sorry for the intrusion.”

Badump. Badump. Badump.

Suddenly Tamaki’s heartbeat quickened. The melody in his head got louder. His fingers trembled and a burning sensation starting from his tattoo spread through his whole body. Tamaki put one hand over his heart, digging his nails into his shirt.

Could it really be?

“I-I am looking for new strings for my guitar---”

Tamaki squeezed his eyes shut and bit his bottom lip. He had to somehow regain focus over himself, or else he would faint. This wonderful, yet dizzying sensation running through him increased by the second.

Banri instantly understood the situation his friend was in right now and stood up from the stool.

“I got this. Try to calm yourself a bit and then help our precious new customer, okay?”, Banri put one hand on Tamaki’s shoulder and leaned in to whisper the last part into his ear.

Tamaki could not let this opportunity go to waste – he had to get a grip. Banri knew how overwhelming it could be to finally meet their soulmate. It felt like having a feverish dream, your body and mind did not function properly anymore. It kind of hurt and made you happy at the same time. But in the end, it was all worth it, because it was the best thing that could ever happen to oneself.

Banri patted the other’s shoulder one last time, giving him a “thumbs up” and a wink, before moving to the front of his shop.

“I am sorry for the long wait. Welcome! Shall I show you the guitar section? Do you need help with choosing the right strings?”, Banri put a wide smile on his face as he approached the apparently very special customer. He could not deny that he was so excited getting a good first look at Tamaki’s possible soulmate. Banri already had a certain vision of them.

And he was so right – so tremendously right. Even he was sure that this man standing there just had to be Tamaki’s significant other. They both gave off such different vibes – vibes that completed each other in such an utterly perfect way that Banri had to stare a bit, unable to say another word.

In front of him was this slim, young adult with short grey-lilac hair, purple colored eyes and a very conservative way to dress. The cuffs of his cardigan were already slightly frayed. He had a simple black tote bag hanging from his shoulder.

“Please. B-But I don’t think I need any help with choosing though. Thank you very much for the offer. I really appreciate that.”, the man bowed shortly and then sheepishly smiled, while scratching the back of his neck.

God, was he innocent. Banri would have loved to just grab him and tell him that his potential, a bit dorky, soulmate was in the other room, waiting for him. He had a thing for bringing people together. But not today. This was not his time to shine. Instead he only nodded and showed him with a wave of his hand that he should follow him. Banri just hoped that Tamaki would regain his full functionality soon and would be able to get in contact with this man.

This was Tamaki’s deepest wish as well right now. He would be damned if he let this chance slide. He took a few deep breaths, hummed one of the melodies out loud to soothe himself and then opened his eyes. He could do that. He was ready. His body was still shaky and burned up, but his determination was stronger.

Well then, feet. Let’s go.

“So, do you mind if I ask you if you compose songs as well or do you play the guitar just for fun?”, Banri just reached the guitar section with his cute customer and stopped in front of their floor models – different pieces of guitars, people could play on as they pleased.

A faint blush spread across the young man’s face and he fiddled nervously with his sleeve, “Uhm, I would not say that I am an expert but yes, I try to compose melodies. I would not yet call them songs though.”

He looked so content while talking about music – why had Banri the expression that he was somehow feeling uncomfortable anyway? Maybe he needed a self-confidence push? And Banri had just the idea – an idea how to help both this shy man and Tamaki. He grabbed his favorite acoustic Gibson model and handed it to the customer.

“Want to show me? I am always happy to hear new creations.”

The other man’s eyes widened in surprise and he flinched a bit backwards. He did not except this course of actions at all. Would he really play one of his melodies in front of a stranger? Was he even able to? Just as he was about to decline the offer, his musical notes shaped tattoo started to tingle and one of his most beloved composition flashed through his mind. Maybe he should try to be brave once?

He extended one trembling hand and took the guitar from Banri. What a beautiful model it was. He let his fingers of his other hand wander over the surface of its body – a small smile on his face.

“You really love music, am I right?”, Banri chuckled, watching the whole scenario in front of him with satisfaction.

“Yes…I do.”, the other’s voice was not above a whisper.

Then he put the strap around his upper body, positioned the guitar in front of him and took one last deep breath.

Here goes nothing.

♫♪♪♫♪♪♫♪♪♫♪♪~

♫♪♪♫♪♪♫♪♪♫♪♪~

♫♪♪♫♪♪♫♪♪♫♪♪~

Tamaki could not believe his ears at first – was he hearing things? Were these melodies in his head already so loud that he imagined them being played right now in the shop?

He quickened his pace, nearly running to the place where the music was coming from. His whole body was trembling with excitement but also a bit fear. What if this person was his soulmate but would not want anything to do with him? What if the connection was not mutual? What if---

“Don’t care. Need to meet them. Need to look into their eyes.”, Tamaki was murmuring these words to himself like a mantra – to insure himself. It wasn’t like him to back up and chicken out. He needed to pursue this now.

Tamaki absentmindedly started to hum the melody as well, filling his whole body with the warmth it radiated. This one was by far his favorite.

And then he reached his destination, eyes fixated on this beautiful young man playing the guitar. He looked like an actual angel. Tamaki immediately stopped in his tracks. He could not take any more steps – his body did not listen to him anymore. Tamaki was engulfed in the other man’s presence. He felt at home. He felt at ease. He felt as if he found the one thing he was so desperately looking for. Tamaki found him. There was no doubt about it. It had to be him. He closed his eyes with a satisfied smile on his face and continued humming along. Tamaki wanted to enjoy the music for a little longer, even though everything in him ached to talk to him, to hear his voice, to hear him laugh, to smell his scent – to finally get to know him.

Even though the grey-lilac haired man was so consumed by his own music, his head immediately jerked into the direction of Tamaki. His purple eyes wide open in awe, sparkling with aspiration. Did this person know the melody of his song? The color of his voice was fitting so perfectly to it – making it complete. His face lightened up. What was this feeling? Happiness? Gratitude? Bliss? He could not quite name it; he only knew that he had never felt like this before. It was flowing through his body, embracing him, soothing him, making him see everything in color.

He was so utterly embarrassed but his fingers refused to stop playing, urging him to go on. His mind was telling him not to miss out on this. This type of connection, without any words, without even knowing each other – was that what they called a “soulmate”? Was he really so lucky to find his significant other here? Did he even deserve to have one? Would he be enough for him? Would the other be disappointed when he realized what a simple person he was?

Please let this song continue forever…

But he knew better. He composed this melody. It had an end. And it came earlier than he had wished for.

The young man let his fingers rest a little longer on the strings of the guitar, smiling a bit awkwardly while trying to catch his breath. How should he break the silence? How should he start a conversation? He was so shy, so self-conscious, but he wanted to talk to Tamaki so badly. He had to fight his demons though – please at least this time.

Just as he was about to open his mouth---

“Best. Feeling. Ever.”, Tamaki exclaimed happily, throwing his arms up in the air. His cheeks had a soft rosy color on them, his eyes were glittering with delight. He started to laugh fervently.

At first the other man was taken a bit aback, but Tamaki’s jubilant mood was contagious. Before he realized it, he was laughing as well, tears of joy forming in his eyes.

Banri silently watched them from a bit afar and could not help but chuckle as well, before slowly removing himself from the scene. Now it was their turn to make the best out of it. He played his part.

After a very intensive and fulfilling laughing session, both of them had to gasp for air. Tamaki was the first to initiate the conversation again.

“Say---D-Do ya feel it too?”, he took one step towards the other man, grabbing his own shirt on the exact spot where his tingling tattoo was under. It burned, it tickled, it sent sensations through his body.

The young man blinked a few times to regain his focus and covered his mouth with one of his hands. He was so infested in his own music and Tamaki’s voice that he blended out everything else. Suddenly it hit him. His right hand snapped on his left forearm, sweetly caressing the area of his clothed tattoo. His heart skipped a beat. Was it changing?

“I-I think I do…”

He raised his head and gave Tamaki the most wonderful smile the other had ever seen. Tamaki gulped. His fingers started to tremble and his legs got all wobbly. What happened to him? He was told that meeting your own soulmate was beyond any logical understanding, but for it to be this overwhelming and fulfilling? Tamaki found it hard to breath, hard to think straight, hard to exist. It cut deep, but it was no hurting pain. It rather opened his eyes and his heart.

Name…need to know his name…

“The name’s Tamaki. Nice to meet’cha possible and long-awaited soulmate~”, he blurted out, because he was sure that he could just be himself around this person. He would not judge him. He would accept him, with all his flaws, all his imperfections.

And Tamaki was right. The young man went along with his rhythm, enjoying the easy-going attitude of the other.

He chuckled into his hand, which still sloppily covered his mouth, “Nice to meet you too, Tamaki-kun. I am Sougo. Ousaka Sougo.”

Badump.

All of his initial fears were washed away. This was it.

“Was looking for ya, Sou-chan~ Ya very good at hiding, ya know~”, Tamaki reached out one hand to affectionately touch Sougo’s head. The other did not avoid the touch, just flinched a bit at the sudden contact. Then he looked straight into Tamaki’s eyes with a confused expression.

“Huh---? Sou-chan?”, Sougo asked, reciting the unusual nickname he seemingly already got.

“Yep!”, Tamaki smiled triumphantly – very proud of his sweet creation. His hand was still on Sougo’s head, before he instantly drew it back in the next moment when a scary thought hit his mind. What if Sougo did not like being called something else?

“I-If ya don’t mind---?”, he sheepishly added to his last sentence, scratching his cheek in embarrassment.

Sougo started to fiddle with a strain of his hair, “I like the sound of it and especially your voice saying it out loud.”

Not sure why, but the nickname made Sougo feel special. Making it more real, like all of this was really happening and Tamaki saw Sougo for himself. He was so utterly joyful that he did not coat his words. They came out naturally – filled with his true feelings.

“S-So smooth, Sou-chan!!”, Tamaki grinned, his cheeks flushed in a soft pink.

Sougo tilted his head a bit. What did Tamaki mean? He of all people should be smooth? Why was---

Then he realized what he had actually said a few seconds ago. Heat rose into his face, coloring it in a deep shade of red. Sougo’s lips started to tremble and he waved his hands all over the place.

“Wha---What did I just say? I-I am sorry for saying such weird things, Tamaki-kun!”

Sougo wanted to vanish. Instantly. How could he say such things to someone he just met?! Hopefully Tamaki was not already grossed out by him. Why did he always ruin things from the start?!

Before Sougo could sink even further into his bad thoughts, he felt a gentle grip on one of his hands. Suddenly their fingers were intertwined. Sougo shyly dared to look straight into Tamaki’s face and was greeted with an understanding expression and a smile. Tamaki’s eyes were fixated on Sougo.

“Weird? Nuh-uh, t’was cute and made me really happy~ Sou-chan~”, Tamaki said and softly squeezed the other’s hand.

Sougo was better than Tamaki could have ever imagined. His voice, his scent, the pleasant vibes he gave off – and his laugh. Never had he heard a more beautiful laugh. Tamaki had to pinch himself to make sure that it wasn't all a dream.

“Ouch. Yep, not dreaming~ Yer the real deal, Sou-chan~”, Tamaki closed the distance between them, their faces now only a few centimeters apart, “Hello there, ‘gain~”

Sougo was not able to move an inch, his eyes still locked on Tamaki’s wonderful blue ones. He was intoxicated. Sougo felt like drowning in Tamaki – and he was not afraid of it. Something deep inside of him knew that this was meant to be. He could be his vulnerable self. He could let himself fall – and Tamaki would catch him. Was this the connection you should feel when you truly found your soulmate?

For a few more moments, they continued to stay like this – just enjoying each other’s company. Time stood still for them. Then the area around Tamaki’s collarbone started to prickle, pushing him back to reality and making him take one step back again. He squeezed Sougo’s hand one last time before reluctantly let go of it. Tamaki pointed at Sougo with his index finger to indicate that he remembered something important.

“Wait!! We’ve to check our tattoos!! Wanna see which awesome colors my clovers got!!”, Tamaki exclaimed, his hands tugging at the end of his shirt, pulling it up. Some of his fare, delicate skin already showing.

Sougo let out a loud yelp and covered his eyes with his palms. How should his heart survive this? It might burst any second now.

“W-W-W-Wait a minute, Tamaki-kun! D-Don’t undress yourself in front of a stranger!”, he nervously stuttered, sheepishly peeking through his fingers though. Sougo hated himself for being such a hypocrite, but he could not help it. He was torn between his decency and the desire to see Tamaki.

Tamaki on the other hand, already got rid of his shirt, without any second thought. He was standing in front of Sougo, bare-chested, and ran his fingers through his hair, while raising one eyebrow.

“Yer not a stranger, Sou-chan! Yer my soulmate. I trust ya~”, Tamaki shot him a double peace sign, grinning like the big dork he was, before trying to get a good look at his tattoo. This was harder than he expected. His lips curled up in a small pout. There was no mirror around and he left his mobile phone in his locker. Good thing Sougo was here with him, right?

“Now would’cha mind telling me which other color I got? Only see the awesome light blue clover here~”

“W-W-W-W-W-What---?”, Sougo’s mind seemed to not function anymore. And could anyone blame him? This was a whole lot to process. Playing one of his songs in front of strangers, finding his soulmate, having close contact and then already seeing him half-naked? This was way too much. He was not prepared.

“Sou-chan, get a grip~ ‘m not that ugly to look at~”

Tamaki shoved Sougo’s hands down, making him stare exactly at his chest. Another yelp sound from Sougo, but he forced his eyes to stay open this time and let them wander over this masterpiece in front of him – stopping at the wonderfully colored four-leaf clover tattoo.

“Purple…t-the other clover is purple…”, Sougo answered in a small voice.

“Just like your eyes, Sou-chan~ That’s pretty neat! Yer always with me now.”

Tamaki put his shirt back on. They still were in Banri’s shop and other customers might come in. This would not be appropriate at all, wouldn’t it? But he was so utterly content. His tattoo now had the best and most perfect colors ever.

Tamaki’s last comment gave Sougo the rest. He let himself sink on the ground; his legs had lost all of their remaining strength. How could Tamaki say such embarrassing things so brazenly? And why did they hit Sougo right into his heart.

“Oi, oi, Sou-chan! Yer alright?!”, Tamaki knelt down before him, a worried expression on his face. Was he too straightforward?

Sougo took a few deep breaths and then did something unusual for him. He poked Tamaki’s nose and giggled.

“I am fine, Tamaki-kun. You are just marvelous. I don’t know how I deserve you…”

He extended his left arm and pushed his sleeve up, exposing his forearm…and his now colored musical notes tattoo. A soft smile spread across Sougo’s face as soon as he realized in which colors his own tattoo lit up.

“Apparently you stay with me as well. I too, have a purple and…a light blue musical note.”

Tamaki’s eyes started to sparkle and the big smile on his face grew even wider and more radiant. This whole situation was beyond perfect.

“Yes…’m so glad, Sou-chan. Thanks for having me from now on~”, Tamaki reached out to gently touch Sougo’s tattoo, tenderly stroking its lines. He felt Sougo shiver under his fingers.

“Likewise, Tamaki-kun. Thank you for accepting me.”, Sougo whispered lovingly and put his free hand on the other’s cheek, while looking longingly into his eyes. He could feel Tamaki leaning into his touch.

This was just the start of their fantastic story. Fate was on their side. Only bliss would remain. Music would connect them forever. Tamaki and Sougo really were meant for each other.

(Side-Note: Good thing that Banri kept all of his customers away from the guitar section…That brat. Undressing himself in his shop. He had a lot to compensate… Soulmate connection was an odd thing. It made you forget the world around you, huh…)