Work Text:
Dear Connor,
You really bug me.
Not yours & never will be yours,
Troye
~
You're really annoying.
You're obsessed with coffee and cats. You like to stay up on Skype and talk about overpriced cafe food. You like to indirect me on Twitter and play with my emotions. You're literally the most aggravating person on this planet.
I hate you to the core.
Not yours & never will be yours,
Troye
~
You're seriously asking for it. How dare you call me at 3 AM. I will end you.
(You're lucky you're cute).
Not yours & never will be yours,
Troye
~
Your lame jokes make me smile & I look forward to your Skype calls.
What even is that?
Stop that shit. I didn't sign up for this. Take these feelings back. I don't want them.
Not yours & never will be yours,
Troye
~
This isn't a game, Franta. You're a real fucking dick. Don't hold my hand under the table while you shamelessly flirt with other people.
I have feelings too, you know.
I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you.
Not yours & never will be yours,
Troye
~
I told myself I wouldn't talk to you ever again, but you showed up at my hotel room with Nutella. I hate you for knowing my weakness.
I'll let this one slide, but you better not fuck up next time.
Not yours & never will be yours,
Troye
~
It's been a while since I've written one of these. I usually write these to express my annoyance towards you, but today will be different. Why? Because I can and because I have a confession to make.
I like you. No,scratch that. I love you. Romantically. Don't ask me how or why. It just happened. It hit me like a wrecking ball.
To be honest, I don't know why I'm writing this. But I just wanted to let you know how I felt.
It's not like I'll tell you anyways.
Not yours & never will be yours,
Troye
~
You called me again at 3 AM, but this time I'm not angry – I'm disappointed and heartbroken. Every minute of the Skype call, I wanted to hang up and cry into my pillow. The way you talked about that amazing person you met made me realize that we would never work out. I'm here and you're over there. That person has you all to herself and I can only see your through a computer screen.
Reality sucks.
I hope that she won't hurt you and I wish you the best. Be happy Con da Bon. You deserve it.
Not yours & never will be yours,
Troye
~
Have you ever ventured into the Tronnor tag on tumblr? I have. The fans write these amazing fics where we end up together and make edits that seem so real, but reality always kicks me in the face when you call me when you're with her. You have no idea how hard it is not to break down in the middle of a Skype call.
I think it's time for me to let these feelings go. I can't keep on holding onto something that never had the chance to begin with.
So I'll say it one last time. I love you, Connor Franta.
Not yours & never will be yours,
Troye
~
Apparently, she wasn't the one. That's okay. There are plenty of fish in the sea.
And maybe, just maybe I'll be that fish.
Not yours & never will be yours,
Troye
~
What the actual fuck?
You can't just come out to me and expect me to be okay. These feelings I had buried deep down are starting to resurface and I don't want them to.
I really, really don't want to go through this again. I'm tired of being set aside when someone better comes around.
Why do you do this to me? Ugh.
Not yours & never will be yours,
Troye
~
No, you do not have feelings for me. That's not how it works, Franta. I'm supposed to love you from afar while you're happy with somebody else. That's how reality works.
What is this 'I have feelings for you' bullshit?
Not yours & never will be yours,
Troye
~
Ugh.
I want to smack the shit out of you and kiss you at the same time. You make my blood boil, yet I crave for your presence. I hate you.
Regretfully yours,
Troye
(P.S. I love you)