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Late nights had always been the worst for your frantic mind. Weary beyond what you thought imaginable. Yet, too troubled by your own anxieties to allow yourself to settle down and sleep. Long have you given up on the idea. Instead, you found yourself alone with naught to do in the quiet darkness of your room but to think. You wished that wasn’t the case.
When you were left alone like this, it was all too easy to get caught up in the endless torrent of thoughts that seemed to plague you. All too easy to dwell on the what-ifs and how you could have done better. It was a nuisance not being able to just shut your mind off at day’s end. With a huff you dragged yourself from your seat by the window, eyes almost immediately falling on the instrument tucked away in a darkened corner. A piano.
You had been surprised to see one here on the First, though you later concluded that it made some sense as you found the differences between this Shard and the Source weren’t too great. Walking over to take a tentative seat, you gently moved the fall board up and away from the keys as your eyes roamed across the darkened polished wood. It had been quite some time since you had last found yourself seated behind such an instrument, but you knew there was only one place to begin after so long.
Calloused fingers idly ran along the keys, slowly pressing each under your fingertip to savor the drawn out melody for a breath before moving to the next. Nothing came to mind that you found yourself recalling how to actually play coherently. But something in the simple motion of your fingers gliding across the keys, even awkwardly at first, was calming. The notes fell flat, the melody ungraceful and shrill but it did much to distract yourself from your own thoughts for a time.
Stretching your fingers across the keys, you recalled Aymeric’s harmless teasing during your lessons. He had taken it upon himself to teach you to play after you had shown an interest one evening. It had been a good distraction for the both of you in those days, even if he enjoyed teasing you about your posture and the placement of your fingers on the keys.
Your fingers were short, oftan bruised and scarred as opposed to his long, slender ones that looked beautiful floating across the keys. Not at all ideal for piano playing you had told him, but he had been adamant and patient with you. Despite the harmless jests that were traded between friends, he was always reassuring and reminding you that you were perfectly capable of doing whatever it was you set your mind to.
A ping of guilt ran through you for not being able to recall much of your lessons, of the information and techniques he so patiently taught you during your time spent in Ishgard. You sighed inwardly and stretched your fingers once more, doing your best to try and remember anything at all that he had taught. Instead all you were able to recall was the feel of his hands upon your own as he would guide you along in the early days of your lessons.
“He wouldn’t mind,” you muttered to yourself, pressing your fingertips to the keys once more. He wouldn’t have, it was the truth. Though it did little to soothe the guilt you nonetheless felt. He'd surely tell you that with everything you've been through since your last lesson, it wasn’t your fault that something so mundane had slipped your mind. Behind his kind smile, would he know that it still weighed on your consciousness to forget something someone spent so much time teaching you? You hoped he knew just how important that time spent together had been to you.
Time was precious afterall. The longer you continued to play the role of hero, the more you had begun to realize just how much you valued time. Valued how it was spent, and who it was spent with. It was why you found yourself so distraught when you failed to remember what had been generously taught to you by those that mattered most.
Your life was hectic, to say the least. At times, it had become increasingly difficult to take note of the little things in life. Of the people and experiences that mattered outside the mounting chaos that you found yourself regularly being pulled into.
Repeatedly plucked from one dilemma to another, you lived in a constant state of being ready to jump into action whenever and wherever needed. Rarely ever allowed the time to stop and take a deep breath. To ask yourself if you were alright with how things had turned out, or ponder all that had been left unresolved.
In lieu, you were regularly the one left asking others if they were alright. What was it that they required? Could you be the one to ease them of their troubles?
In your heart, you knew you didn’t mind. It was what left you feeling content after all. Like you had finally found your place in this big, wide world.
Curious, you thought with a quiet hum as you struck a shrill note that hung in the air. Had you known that you had even been searching for such a thing when all this started? Before you had met the Scions and had learned how extraordinary your blessing was? You weren't too sure any longer. There might have been a chance that you had alluded to it at some point in these long years, if only subconsciously.
Even having found your place—having found what finally made you feel whole, it didn’t mean that you didn’t value how precious time had become. It moved so rapidly, waited for no one and nothing. Chances here one moment and gone the next. Thus, when someone that you cared about came along, wanting to genuinely spend those precious few moments afforded to them with you without asking for anything in return, you truly wanted to appreciate every second given. For who knew how long it would be before you'd be granted another moment of respite.
Your fingers stopped moving across the keys, the notes dying in the air abruptly as the hairs on the back of your neck stood up. Your train of thought interrupted as you felt eyes upon you. Not feeling the need to be bothered to turn around in your seat, you called out into the darkened room, “It’s unlike you to lurk.”
For a brief moment there was no reply. Idly you wondered if he was really going to force you to turn around to inquire further, but then you heard his soft footsteps and the voice of Emet-Selch ringing out from the dark. "Believe me when I say, I was simply too stunned to announce myself.”
Listening as he approached, you silently counted his slow footsteps to gauge how far from you he had been this whole time. Not too far, you judged as he came into your peripheral, leaning over your shoulder to gently press a finger to one of the keys.
Perhaps you should have been shocked to see him here. An Ascian appearing to you out of the blue, and in such a confined space normally led to trouble. Though he had thus far proven himself true to his word, he was after all still technically your enemy.
That alone should have had you feeling on edge and itching to draw your weapons but in truth, you felt neither of those things in his presence. It was foolish to think, but you did oddly feel at ease around him everytime he chose to appear to you solely. Which seemed to be becoming rather frequent, and to that you couldn’t really say that you were beginning to mind the company that much. Even if he could be an annoyance, it was still a distraction from your own thoughts.
“You, too stunned for words? I find that hard to believe.” Your lips twisted into a frown, an eyebrow raising as you watched him take a seat next to you on the bench. Nonchalantly making himself comfortable and adjusting his robes around him. "Nevertheless, do I dare to ask what had the fortune of leaving you, of all people, rendered so speechless?"
"Your atrocious performing skills," he responded, his tone flat. "It's obvious that such a beautifully crafted instrument is wasted on you with your lack of expertise."
You blinked in confusion, already regretting having acknowledged him at all. What a miserable man.
“I apologize that my skills aren’t up to your standards, Ascian.” Rolling your eyes with a huff, you did your best to ignore the annoyance that ran through you at his words. Afterall it was what he wanted, to get under your skin whenever possible for his own amusement. But no, you wouldn't allow it to bother you. “Though I assure you that by playing alone in my inn room, I thought myself free to play as poorly as I wished.”
He shook his head, feigning disappointment with an overly dramatic sigh. At least, you thought it feigned. You weren't too sure when it came to him. He always seemed a bit overly theatrical, if you were being honest. "Did none teach you to have respect for the craft? Always play as if there are hundreds of scrutinizing eyes upon you at all times."
Shrugging your shoulders in response, he fixed you with his lackadaisical gaze. "I was simply trying to unwind. Besides, I've had very few lessons, and they were some time ago so I'm rusty."
"Then do try to pay close attention for a change, Warrior."
Shocked. You were completely and utterly shocked by the beautifully haunting melody that filled the room just seconds later. Mesmerized by the way his fingers moved so gracefully across the keys, as if they were an extension of him. His lanky form so at ease beside you that it seemed as if playing was second nature to him. It might have actually been, you considered. Living as long as he seemed to have, one typically had to have some sort of hobbies to preoccupy the time. You just hadn’t expected him to so openly share them with you. It was peculiar to witness.
Even more so, something about the melody he was creating was frighteningly familiar. It conjured an image on the far edge of your mind that you struggled to grasp and understand. It frayed at the edges and slipped through your fingers like sand every time you attempted to reach for it to pull it to the forefront of your mind. The longer that you listened to him play, you felt as if something had begun to tug at your heartstring. As if something within was begging you to remember what wasn't yours to recall.
Your skin prickled strangely as a faint sensation of electricity washed over you. A distant and blurred memory, a reminder filled with warmth and an unyielding affection that was foreign to you coming to mind. It washed over your skin gently, rolling through your hair and sending a shudder to run down your spine. How strange, you grimaced.
You furrowed your brow and watched him continue to play, seemingly utterly lost to your presence beside him as his fingers glide effortlessly across the keys. Was this some sort of trick he was playing, or was your weary mind simply imagining things? Surely with how late it was, it was the latter.
“You’re quite good,” you complimented as you realized his performance was coming to a close.
He snorted in response, casting you a sidelong glance. “I’m aware.”
“Cocksure attitude aside,” you jested, unable to suppress the slight laugh that escaped you. “That was very beautiful, even for you.”
He was silent for a moment, his jaw tightening before it was perfectly masked. “Yes well, it was a favorite of someone I was once familiar with,” he responded, gaze falling back towards his fingers as they began to move slowly once again to fill the room with another soft tune. He listened as you hummed quietly and nodded your head, which caused him to inwardly sigh in relief that you didn’t seem inclined to press the subject further. He very well couldn’t just reveal that it had once been your favorite song, now could he?
Having had the intention of pestering, he had originally thought to test his luck to find what information you would willingly share with him on the Exarch. It had never been much in the past, at least nothing of importance that he didn’t already know. You were surprisingly good at withholding what he wanted to hear. He had been taken back to hear the sound of music, uncoordinated as it was, filling the air of your darkened room when he had appeared. Even more astonished to see that the source of the sound was the warrior themselves.
It brought back a jolt of bitter memories, as he noticed that your presence occasionally would. His nose crinkling in disgust as he stood back and listened to you play. He wasn’t overly fond of comparing you to them, but the similarities were at times startling. There was no arguing the matter that you did indeed share the same soul. It was painfully obvious to any with his skills. Though it didn’t mean he relished the idea of it, especially now that he was confronted with these memories he thought to have long since buried.
He was reminded of regularly spending his evenings with you, not a care in the world as the pair of you would play melody after melody well into the night. You had asked him to teach you to play out of the blue one day. The sudden interest you had shown had seemed genuine enough, but he'd been reluctant to agree at first nonetheless. Despite his growing fondness for you, it would be time-consuming—not that he saw having an excuse to spend more time alone with you was ever something he could tire of.
To his utter shock, you had something of a natural talent for music and picked up playing rather quickly. Truthfully he shouldn’t have been shocked as even back then he knew that you were quite miraculous, to say the least. But that was then and this was now he told himself countless times. You shared the same soul, but you weren’t the same person. You weren’t his. So why did he pretend otherwise and continue to appear to you when he knew that you were unaccompanied by your troublesome companions?
He told himself that it was to win you over. Gain your trust, and he needn't bother with those pesky allies of your. It was all an act that lended to the greater scheme of things. Albeit, he wasn't sure if even he fully believed that any longer. As much as he loathed to admit, he was beginning to find that he enjoyed your presence and that complicated things. Despite being granted the momentary reminder of what had once been, his plan would continue nonetheless. Whether you failed to contain the light or not, the First and ultimately you; would see your end one way or another.
Casting another sidelong glance at you beside him, he could see that your once magnificent soul was now tarnished and permeated with light. The luminous color long dimmed and washed out, the shell slowly beginning to splinter as Warden after Warden was consumed. Were you even aware, he wondered.
His playing slowed down, the tune coming to an end as he watched as you suddenly raised your own hands to the keys. Curiously he stopped a few notes short of ending, only for you to press the tips of your fingers gently to the keys and finish the last few notes required. It was his turn to raise an eyebrow as you turned slightly to give him a weak smile.
"This one I knew," you explained softly. You had been startled to have recognized the tune when he had begun playing. The semblance of a smile forming on your lips when you recalled the many times Aymeric had played it for you. "A favorite of someone I know."
Emet hummed in acknowledgment, keeping his gaze trained on you while you played a few more tentative notes. Though clearly not wholly familiar with the full length of many songs, you seemed able to grasp different bits and pieces and were able to play them. He hated how it reminded him of teaching you a lifetime ago how to play. Of the days when you first started out and would tentatively play a few notes only to ask him to join you and play the next few with you. Just so you could be sure you were correct, you had once said.
This was no different it seemed. He recognized what it was that you were attempting to play now and brought his own hands to the keys to join you and play the corresponding notes before yours could end.
You noticed that the two of you eventually fell into a strange, yet comforting rhythm. Although the melody was at first awkward until you had caught on to what he was doing, you found that you oddly appreciated the gesture. Something in the motions of moving together to create something felt oddly natural, though you weren't sure as to why. Surely you imagined it, even as a sense of familiarity washed over you as your fingers occasionally brushed against each other as you played.
You sensed you'd done this before. Perhaps hundreds of times by how at ease you felt to be playing with him. Only it utterly escaped you as to why you felt as such, surely that was impossible. Wasn't it?
It was truly a very curious thing, and yet you still found yourself appreciative of another's presence by your side at that moment. Even if it was with the likes of Emet-Selch. It oddly made for time well spent and a good distraction.