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Lotor had spent most of his life pretending that he was something he wasn’t: happy. His father led the war with an iron fist, ruling over everything like it was his destiny to command, to practically own entire species. Lotor, however, never really agreed with that idea. Growing up it had slowly sunk in that the people who smiled at him every day, constantly offering their services, did so out of terror for their lives.
It was only when he was on the cusp of double digits that he noticed the thin, silver collars around some of the ‘helpers’ in their home, but when he’d asked his mother about them, she’d promptly informed him that this was how it was supposed to be, and that was all. Friends were never a prominent thing in his life. Usually, those who came around shared the same sentiments as his parents, or just wanted to get into his good graces so they’d be safe. No one ever truly wanted to get to know him.
That is until he met her .
Allura came into his life so suddenly. Like a gentle rain after a summer that burned everything in its wake. They’d first met when they were just kids, crashing awkwardly into each other’s lives. Though both had been too wise for any human to be able to look at them and realize their ages, a feat most fae could claim.
*
Lotor was wandering through the forests to escape his nagging ‘handler’. The forest was like a connector of kingdoms for the Galra (the name for the Vampire’s Dominion, one he’d grown to despise) and Altea (the Fairy Kingdom, a land foreign to him, yet half his lineage). He’d learned about this in his many sessions with his tutors, so he’d avoided the edges as he’d always been instructed – mostly due to not wanting to be kidnapped, though sometimes it was a tempting notion. Then…suddenly, on this one particular sunset getaway, he found himself on the grass, a young hand wrapped around his small throat, the breath knocked out of him.
It took him a moment before he realized the body above him had wings – a fairy! Lotor met their eyes and was instantly overcome with waves of recognition. The princess. Her short, bob-like white hair that curled just barely past her shoulders, a stark contrast to the tan that graced her sparkling skin. There were small, pink fairy marks on her cheeks, just under her eyes, that shined a little when they caught the sunlight. But it was the pale pink dots in the center of her pupils that made his chest feel heavy – it was just like his mother’s had been.
It was another few blinks before he could find himself again. Right, she was an enemy. She'd attacked. He took a breath to steady himself before smoothly flipping, using the princess's inadequate hold against her. Lotor had been trained to fight his entire life since he could walk . He had a strong feeling the fairy princess did not have to live such a life, just from her skill level. He placed just enough pressure on her to keep her in place as he hovered above her. Bright blue eyes met his own with such obstinate resistance that he almost wanted to smile. There was a fire there that he so desired to mirror. If only.
“Princess Allura, you will not be taking me on this day,” he informed her curtly, doing his best to keep any emotion from his face, “Now, if I release you, will you please just return home?”
There was a visible shock to the princess’ features before her shoulders relaxed. Allura squinted at the Prince, still wary of him, but offered him a small nod of surrender. Lotor slowly released her, nodding in agreement.
“What are you doing here, anyway? You’re far too close to the border for…one of yours,” Allura murmured, her eyes narrowed. Her caution was laced in every nerve of her body, arms wrapped around her knees as she sat against the thick tree he ’d pinned her by. A vampire was still a vampire, even if he’d released her. She needed to stay cautious. Wings spread out gently, she fought the instinct to wrap them around her protectively, only so that Lotor wouldn’t have better access to them and her.
Lotor stood after releasing her and took a deep breath, eyes scanning the area as he realized her words rang true. He hadn’t noticed just how far he’d wandered. Thinking he’d stuck to his usual path, but he’d apparently veered off at some point. This was my fault, not hers…
“I was…trying to escape someone,” he kicked the ground, frowning at the thought of being found, but hating that he had to admit his error more. He was usually quite good at sticking to a path, but he supposed today was an exception, he had been especially lost in his thoughts.
“Escape? What in the world do you have to escape from?” she scoffed and dared to roll her eyes at him, watching him closely - though always keeping a certain amount of distance between them. Lotor’s posture told her something was wrong, his back was too straight to be comfortable, shoulders tight and lips tensed to a line. His eyes kept looking around like he was waiting for something to jump out at him. It was strange, Allura was so accustomed to being the one on edge, the one having to watch her back, but now seeing the habits she had in the so-called Prince was… alarming. “You’re…not like the others I’ve met. Are you really Lotor, Emperor Zarkon’s son?”
He knew, even so young, that he was expected to be a ‘certain way’, as the son of the Almighty Emperor. However…he just couldn’t manage it, not in front of the very person who was the daughter of the number one target of his father’s oppression. Altea had suffered so much. Fairies dwindled each day because of Zarkon, and all because he wanted to have the largest species size; the most control . Lotor sighed, his shoulders falling as he resigned himself to taking a seat across from her, still keeping a small, respectful distance between them. He eyed Allura, trying to make out her intentions before giving her an answer. He found himself utterly unable to lie to someone who wore her emotions so openly.
“Not what you expected, I presume?” he smiled, it was fake and weak, instantly falling to a flat line on his lips again, “I can’t say…what I would like… So I’ll just say…-” he met her eyes gently, “I’m sorry.”
The air between them was thick with an emotion she couldn’t place, and Allura had to resist the urge to reach out to him. Instead, she closed her eyes, wings wrapping around her now, protectively, as she thought about his words. An apology? From the son of the man who had taken so many of her people? The son of the woman who had been such a dear friend of her family? It was…too good to be true, right? But she couldn’t sense any lies in his expression, his body language, or his faint aura, no matter how hard she searched.
“Why do you stay here, Lotor?” she breathed finally, daring to ask. The words hung between them for a moment as Lotor froze completely, his back straightening as he just... stared at her, wide-eyed. Allura fumbled with her hands uncomfortably, truly feeling the weight of the silence and about to take the question back when Lotor finally shook his head, opening his mouth to speak, expression unreadable.
“My, that is a question,” he scoffed, laughing without humor, “Where exactly could I go, Princess? Who would take me? I am stuck here, the world is the way it is, we are mere pawns in a cruel game of fate.”
Lotor’s eyes grew dim for a breath of a moment, but it left so quickly that Allura almost didn’t catch it. Almost. Her eyes narrowed, his words hitting her in a way that made her want to get angry, but she knew it would be foolish to do such a thing in the current company. Averting her gaze, she tried to collect her words before speaking, not wanting to say the wrong thing. A deep breath, Allura leveled the prince with an even expression. She decided to start small.
"What makes you believe we are all pawns for something so cruel?"
"I see it in my people's faces every day. No one benefits from war, Princess. No one, but the king. What else but a cruel fate could design such a thing?"
“I refuse to believe in a fate that could be so cruel to those would dare be so…” she pursed her lips, unsure how to phrase it, but pressed on, gaze not wavering from his, “ caring , to those who need it so dearly. Fate cannot…be that evil. If it is, I’ll change it .” Her tone was determined, fierce, and enough to make him blink with shocked eyes and breath caught in his throat.
Lotor exhaled hard, folding his hands in his lap, shoulders slumping in surrender, not having the energy to argue anything more. Maybe she was right, but he couldn’t consider such a fate when his own was set in stone. He would live under his parents’ thumb until he was to have his own royal duties, but more likely, die with the way things were going. Not that it mattered anymore. He had nowhere to go, the fairy made it all sound so…easy, but nothing was. Not truly.
His handler was probably losing her mind looking for him, a most amusing thought really, but he just wanted to lose himself to the greenery of the forest before being inevitably found – and scolded. Lotor’s eyes wandered the many leaves of the branches, the flowers sprouting near the edges of the border, the colorful dust that floated between the two lands. Allura seemed to be watching him intently because she leaned in slightly as she studied his face. He supposed his inner turmoil could be easily seen. Still, he hoped he wasn’t asked any other intrusive questions this day.
Allura’s wings unfolded, flapping slowly as she floated closer to Lotor’s side. To his surprise, she simply sat there, folded knees touching his own as she peered up at the tree cover and tried to find the right words to say again. With a breath, she made the attempt, this time more determined to get the words across.
“I cannot…pretend to know what it’s like for you,” she frowned, shaking her head and trying again, “I do not think you are alone in this… feeling, Prince Lotor. Let’s… Let’s meet here again. I’d like to talk to you more. If that’s alright with you. Here, near the border.” She emphasized that last part because even though she had a feeling he was on their side, she didn’t fully trust the vampire, yet. She had to meet him on a territory that was safe, or, at the very least, neutral.
Lotor had such a look of disbelief in his eyes, so heavy and crinkled, that he was certain his young teen face would carry those lines with it far into young-adulthood. He lifted the jaw he hadn’t known was agape and swallowed back the anxiety that suddenly rose. Sneaking away hasn’t been so bad, I suppose . I could afford to keep doing so. He wasn't sure what it was about her presence, but something about the invitation to keep escaping to this place and talk to someone who wasn’t going to force him to be something else made him want to agree before he could second guess.
“Really…” the word was a soft murmur that barely left his lips, but he knew she could hear it, “I…I would enjoy that…” He tried to convince himself the pink on his cheeks was just a product of his own fairy markings, ignoring the warmth there that told him he was incredibly wrong.
“Good! Then I’ll see you again next week!” Allura raised a hand to shake on it, a grin spreading across her face, “Quickly, please, I think I hear whoever you ’re running from and I’d like to not be here when they arrive.”
The spark that had been in her eyes when she’d first appeared was back again, and there was a very small twinkle of mischief – so small that Lotor had to wonder if maybe he imagined it. Their fingers wrapped around each other’s forearm, giving one firm shake before releasing and eyes meeting. Lotor offered her a nervous smile.
“Go,” he nodded, “and…thank you, truly .”
The fairy flew off faster than he’d ever expected, and suddenly he was alone, but it was an ‘alone’ that he was unfamiliar with until now. He wasn’t lonely. There was a promise, something to look forward to. Someone who didn’t look at him and think he was destined to dominate the world. At least, he hoped.
One week.
—
Seven days. Young Lotor had been quite foolish to think it would only be once he'd be waiting that long. It rapidly turned into years of meetings. Over time, they’d become close friends, and Lotor had come to rely on the Princess. It wasn’t often that he didn’t know what to say when it came to Allura, unlike with his family and supposed subordinates. Words between them usually flowed easily. They’d exchange witty remarks, argue playfully, and tease each other until the early hours of the morning. Some nights they’d exchange books, or banter about the real uses of some of the human world’s strangest contraptions. Their conversations ranged from their mutual love of the unknown to finding out the oddities of each other’s habits. Allura loved to roll around in the flowers and talk or play with the animals, whereas Lotor preferred to quietly sit on a high tree branch and read, ignoring most small creatures. They found each other strange, but endlessly interesting, and their meetings were never dull.
Sometimes though, on rare occasions, Lotor would show up late, covered in far too many dark marks, eyes vacant, with a resigned expression he never had for her, and Allura would just sit with him, telling him stories until his expression finally softened. Only if and when he felt ready, would she ask what happened – though usually she could already guess; Zarkon was not merciful to those that were not perfectly in line, especially if they spoke against him. Lotor was no exception, regardless of lineage. As he grew older, his tongue grew looser, and he was no longer the young boy who hid in the corners from his father. Which only meant trouble was more frequent. He often wondered why he wasn’t exiled but knew it was because he was the sole heir.
Once he’d return to himself, Lotor would exhale hard, and explain what transpired. Typically how he’ d spoken out of turn or said something he shouldn’t have, unable to hold his tongue anymore. Allura had always been a soothing energy for him, and he appreciated the mutual respect they shared. He could earnestly tell her the truth of matters he was never willing to share with anyone else, and always expect a genuine response, though always knowing it was never laced with malice nor pity. She often had earnest words for him, encouraging him to not back down, and he didn’t, it wasn’t in him. He often promised her that one day he’d see to it that his father would fall. She always offered him a conflicted look at that, but he knew deep down, the day would come when he had no choice.
But then his father decided to take his obsession a step further.
Allura's princess title was replaced. Queen Allura, as his father had forced upon her, after eliminating her family nearly a decade after they’d initially met. He still remembered the weeks they went without seeing each other while she had begun her new rule, and how empty those months had felt. Often then, he’d considered that maybe she’d finally grown to resent him. Maybe she finally blamed him for the things his parents had caused, and he hated himself for knowing how true it was – it’s my fault .
To his surprise, just under two months later, he found Allura curled up with a book against a familiar tree, waiting for him with a smile that hadn’t quite touched her eyes.
He was afraid at first, terrified to approach and be rejected, or that maybe it was a trap, but when tears began to spill as their gazes locked, he ignored those fears to rush beside her, arms around her shoulders in a fierce embrace.
“I’m so sorry, Allura,” he whispered over and over, eyes closed with so much regret weighing heavy on his shoulders, “Please, if there’s anything…” Knowing there was nothing, but wanting so desperately to remove her pain, he let out a broken plea.
Allura was leaning her cheek against his chest, quiet tears spilling, knees hugged to her chest tight, and pale., pink wings folded tightly into her back, their Shimmer having grown dim. Bright blue eyes, clouded with grief, peered up at him searching for something, anything to hold onto. Lotor rubbed slow circles between her shoulder blades, the space between her wings, trying to soothe but also having no clue what else to say. They sat in silence for a moment longer, until Allura took a deep, shaky breath.
“Lotor,” she whispered, leaning away a bit to meet his gaze evenly, only now realizing how sorrow-filled those deep blue hues of his were as well and having to pause again. She looked at him, really took him in, and realized he was scarred now, marks and bruises more scattered than before, and her hands shook as they reached for his forearms.
“L-Lotor, please… join us. Don’t stay here. I… I can't keep visiting you like this. I must rule now. And…” Allura quickly reached up to wipe away fresh tears, fear and panic rising, but her determination was stronger, “I’m leading the rebellion now, Lotor. I would… I would like for you to join us. You’re not… You’re not safe here. I know you’re not happy. Don’t you… Don’t you want to be?” Though the deep seeds of grief were still behind her gaze, there was such pleading in her eyes that had Lotor’s wide. When he didn’t answer right away, she pressed her fingers against his bare collarbone, where a new, deep white scar lay. “You’ll die here… please come with me,” it wasn’t a question this time, it was a whispered plea. Lotor was crumbling beneath her grasp.
"Allura… Allura, I..," Lotor sat back, he needed a minute to process this. Yes, of course, he had considered running off to join the rebels. But being accepted was a whole other thing he would have to consider. His own family hated him! There was no guarantee it would go any better elsewhere.
But Allura was right about one thing. He wasn't happy. He never genuinely had been. Allura had given him tastes of what that felt like, and Lotor selfishly wanted more. He wanted it for himself, and his people. If he stayed with the Galra, he would likely die. That was something he thought he'd accepted ages ago, but now he wanted to fight.
"I'll go.. With you," Lotor met Allura's gaze with a fierceness he hadn't shown before, "But only to defeat my father."
"Wait, are you sure that's what you still want? He may be our enemy, but will you be okay? He's your father," she was very hesitant to let him consider patricide.
"He has never been a father. Look, your rebels may despise me, I may even have to fight alone, but I don't care. Just let me take down my fa-" Lotor gritted his teeth, "Zarkon."
Reluctantly, Allura nodded. "Understood."
"When do we leave?"
"
Now
, grab on to me."