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The day had just begun but Elijah had that feeling so much had happened already. The druid was up by seven, between meetings and ordering the servants around, he hadn’t actually got a rest. During said meetings, he just listened, reflected on the issues in hand and delegated his position. In the end, a lot was still left to decide but Elijah noted the best points to discuss later with the queen.
He had smiled to himself when Lena entered as they were closing the last meeting of the morning. The high lords and proud knights had bowed down to her but not Elijah. They had apologized since they would’ve waited if they had known the queen would like to be present. Almost getting on their knees and kissing her hand to plead for her forgiveness. Queen Lena had waved them off and requested they continued, all that without taking her eyes off of him. And Elijah smiled again, a little mischief behind.
They hadn’t said a word to each other. The druid with his arms crossed leaned to the colossal, archaic window, trying not to get distracted, and Lena comfortably seated on the end of the table. Always challenging his restraint.
It was an old game of theirs since the day Elijah came from his glacial, cruel land to serve Cintra instead. The druid, although ambitious, had never truly believed he would ever leave Vespaden. The cold had never been a problem, Elijah embraced it just fine. However, the constant conflicts were maddening and had the druid fantasizing about thousands of places far, far away.
Then Lena Rowena Tiona of Cintra chanced upon the druid. Hurt and attempting to steal provisions under the guard’s noses. She had easily overpowered him, laughed when Elijah stumbled to the snow and stopped the taunting when he realised he couldn’t get back up. Back then Lena was still a princess and what she had come to know of war were stories. Lessons from her father, and the servant’s talk.
And what had seemed like an endless war finally came to its conclusion. Because that night, she had helped him and heard his delirious prayers when no one would.
After the lords left, and it was just the two of them, Elijah smirked. He had walked closer to the queen who eyed him predatorily from top to bottom.
‘’Is there anything you require, Your Highness?’’ he had said.
Lena had raised an eyebrow, that single action brought memories back. Sleepless, but not unpleasant nights. No , not unpleasant at all. The queen had gotten up, the chair slid to allow her to walk past Elijah yet he didn’t look discouraged. It was all part of the game: he pulled, and she pushed. She demanded, and he defied.
Now Elijah was wandering the gardens because she had asked. Sometimes there were things way too important to gamble with, so the druid only nodded in return and left to fulfil his duty. Even if the day had just begun, Elijah had his hands full and he wouldn’t trade that life for the world.
Elijah paced around with his hands behind his back. To most bystanders, the druid might seem distracted and lost in thought: Features relaxed but never losing those traces of arrogance Elijah had no shame to show off, and stormy blue eyes drifting throughout the space. Once in a while he would angle his head to have a clearer view under the tree's crowns, and that was the only evidence that Elijah was actually searching for something. Or rather, someone .
The druid sighed, shaking his head when he checked one more tree. Elijah looked around, his brow acquiring a peevish curve. So he started calling for her, putting aside his pride.
‘’Princess! Princess, your grandmother requested your presence.’’
Nothing. Elijah slowly became irritated as he kept calling with no response. It was strange but the princess never ventured past the gardens. The gates were guarded which meant she had to be somewhere, Elijah breathed to tame his temper.
Ten years ago, when Chloe was born, the druid declared he would not care for the baby. After all, he was no nursemaid and refused to act like one. A couple of years, and Elijah would swallow his words… The day Lena locked herself in her room, the day the news of her daughter’s death reached Cintra. Someone had to step up, not merely preserve the kingdom's order but also watch over the little princess.
Times of darkness and hardship that Elijah had difficulty remembering. Yet of one thing he was sure, he had disciplined himself and broken a lot of habits.
As he was about to shout Princess Chloe’s name, the druid spotted golden curls. A little girl with a pale dress settled on the grass, she was distracted and looking away from him. Elijah’s skin crawled recalling the piece of clothing was one of the newer ones.
‘’Princess Chloe,’’ he stood behind her. She turned, and Elijah really tried to stay angry at her. However, her round eyes gleamed and some of her distress spilled over, tainting her cheeks. Elijah couldn’t block the startled expression. ‘’Princess, what’s wrong?’’
Chloe sniffed and that’s when the druid noticed the gush of snot. Elijah would have been disgusted hadn’t he been in that exact position many times before, - he simply took out his handkerchief. In return, the child whined when he cleaned her nose and pulled at his sleeve to prevent him from carrying it out. To no avail, of course.
Finally, Elijah tucked away the tissue and actually understood what had caught the princess attention. Placed on the trimmed grass, a bird too inert to be alive. There was a sudden instinct deep inside his chest to pull her away from it but Elijah ignored it as it could worsen the situation. Chloe was looking up at him, and the druid nodded in sympathy. Against his will, - that urged him not to, - Elijah got to his knees next to Chloe.
‘’You found it?’’ he said.
‘’Yes...’’
Elijah’s lips were pressed into a thin line as he pondered. He was fairly acquainted with death, destiny had yielded it that way. In spite of it, Elijah had no idea how to approach it, since he had a special understanding of death. He forced himself to mold it, distort it a bit just for Chloe.
‘’It’s in a better place.’’
‘’You don’t believe that,’’ the princess retorted.
There was no hint of uncertainty in her tone, and Elijah had to hold in a dry laugh as it didn’t seem appropriate in that moment. The druid bit the inside of his cheek, because then again, lying didn’t seem appropriate either.
‘’I prefered if you believed it.’’
‘’Well, I don’t!’’
Chloe snapped back, voice high pitched with the strain pilling up again. The druid glanced back and forth between the princess and the bird given that he couldn’t really tell where that fury came from. Even though Chloe had been born with a silver spoon, she had never raised her voice to servants, much less to him. Before Elijah could attempt to pacify her, the princess spoke again.
‘’I can’t believe it’s in a better place when it was flying, and singing and it could go anywhere and see everything from up high…’’
More tears dropped, one by one, and Elijah was officially intrigued by her behavior. So the druid decided to change tactics.
‘’You want to know what I truly think?’’ Chloe glanced at him, she suppressed a sob and nodded. ‘’Princess, death is part of life. It isn’t unfair, or evil. It just is. You are born, you live and you die.’’
Once again, Elijah quelled his aversion to the dirt and foul, and seized the bird’s body on the palm of his hands. He didn’t expect it to be warm still but he brushed it aside.
‘’Death is only sad from the perspective of those who depart from this world. And of course, those who have to stay behind.’’ The princess averted her gaze and played with her blonde hair. ‘’There’s no need to be frightened. It was the bird’s fate to end up here, but if it eases your worries we can bury it.’’
Elijah moved the bird to his right hand and got up. His free hand was stretched out for Chloe to take it but she didn’t. Instead, the princess continued on her knees and locked her eyes to his. She whispered the next words, voice so small Elijah wasn’t sure he had heard it right.
‘’It wasn’t fate… it was me.’’
Elijah’s eyes creased in a mixture of fascination and confusion. He was unsure if he should request further clarification, he chose to play it safe.
‘’It wasn’t your fault, princess.’’
Unfortunately, those were the wrong words to utter. Chloe jolted up and tugged his arm desperately, as if it would make him listen better to what she kept saying. It was me, it was me, it was me. And the girl trembled and yelled out the same thing. It was me, it was me.
The druid discarded the animal to the ground and kneeled again, grabbing Chloe by her shoulders to make her stop. Her cries only got worse, and she jumbled on that damned sentence.
‘’Hey, hey,’’ Elijah tried to speak above her and stay calm. Joining her hysteria wouldn’t benefit the situation.
‘’I di-didn’t m-mean to! I s-s-swear!’’
‘’Chloe, it wasn’t your fault.’’
‘’It-it was flying, a-and I…’’ She closed her eyes and more water flowed down her rosy cheek. As she tried to catch her breath, Chloe held her hands to her heart. ‘’I...I wanted to c-catch it… a-and it… it fell.’’
That time Elijah paid attention. He glanced at the bird from the corner of his eye and then back to Chloe.
‘’The bird… it just fell? Out of the blue?’’
The princess opened her eyes again and assented.
Many years on court had trained Elijah not to show what he truly felt, so his face remained impartial. Although his jaw was set because nothing could prepare him to the dread invading his being. It started right in the middle of his chest, and it spread in waves until he felt a shiver down his spine. After the initial shock, Elijah grinned.
‘’Fate… fate has curious ways. Some say it’s a web, being weavered over the time. It gets longer, intricate as it is corrected to pull us closer to where we are supposed to be… Tell me, how could you cause it?’’
Chloe shrugged and her eyes shifted on the druid’s face before lowering. He continued when it seemed to be working and the crying was reduced to a few sobs.
‘’You didn’t cause this, you were just here when it happened, ok?’’
Redunctly, the princess nodded. Elijah said some more soothing words in a tone he had learned just for Chloe, then he embraced her.
The girl wiped some tears against his shoulder and messily with her hand. Elijah distanced himself to give her an amusing look that should be scolding… but he couldn’t. And Elijah tricked himself into thinking it was only this time. Given that she was upset, he possibly couldn’t reprimand her. The truth though was that he had gone soft.
No , not soft. He spared a small spot for the princess, just that.
Elijah took her back to the castle, hand in hand with Chloe, and a dead dove on the other. His face was hardened as his thoughts ran wild, and he prepared the discussion he and Lena would partake in later. It was a conversation they’ve been postponing for years but they had to talk about it.
The lengths he would go to in order to protect Lena and Chloe were unimaginable. And they were about to be tested, sooner or later... Whatever his thread of destiny led him into.