Chapter Text
August 29th
The scene before Yesung's eyes was happening in slow motion, a sight so familiar it almost seemed like a deja vu. The entrance to the airport, the members, and on his left, the same three vans as always, now empty. To one side, their manager, counting heads while the members greeted each other for the first time that day. Towards the front of the group he could see Leeteuk timidly hugging Heechul, and of course, Siwon and Donghae saying hello like they hadn’t seen each other in weeks. Behind him, Kyuhyun was waiting for Ryeowook, who seemed to be searching for something in his bag, and right in front of him stood the person he was trying to avoid.
Just like in a movie, time slowed down while he tried to decide what to do. Standing just three feet away, Shindong was almost done saying hello to Hyukjae, and if the scene were to happen like it usually did, Hyukjae’s smile would be beaming towards Yesung in a couple of seconds. And so he’d then approach his dongsaeng, put his arm around him and say something like “yo, my man”, which would make Hyukjae chuckle.
But not this time.
August 24th - 5 days earlier.
Yesung hadn’t stopped replying to birthday messages since he had woken up. Even if he loved celebrating his birthday, sometimes replying to everybody and organizing parties became tedious. It didn’t use to bother me so much, he thought. I really am getting old.
And so, just as he was done having lunch with his parents and his brother, the screen on his phone lit up with a birthday message that pulled out a genuine smile from him.
Huehppy birthday, hyung! #Aesongie, read Hyukjae’s tweet.
“Ugh, annoying brat”, he said out loud but to no one in particular. The smile on his face, however, didn’t match his words, which only made his brother laugh to himself. There was only one person who could have that effect on Yesung, so he didn’t even have to ask who it was. Jongjin only rolled his eyes and started gathering up the plates as his older brother only sat there smiling down at the screen of his phone.
Thank you, love you! Yesung tweeted back.
And soon enough, a text message followed.
Hyukjae
|| I’m sorry I can’t be there tonight, hyung.
Ah, it's okay, really ||
Besides you’re not the only one ||
Everyone has their own schedules, it’s fine ||
|| I know
|| But I’m still sorry
Don’t worry ||
I know you love me anyway~~ ||
|| You know what? Forget I said anything
Hahahahahaha ||
|| Okay, so before you say anything that makes me regret it…
|| Do you want to have lunch tomorrow?
|| It’s on me
Yeah, do you have anything in mind? ||
|| Not really, not yet
Do you want to go to that place Kyu told us about the other day? ||
|| Uuuu, yesss
I’ll ask the others tonight if they wanna come ||
|| Alright, but tell them that I’m only buying you lunch
|| If was paying for everyone, they’d invite everyone they know just to mess with me
Hahaha ok, I’ll tell them ||
|| Have fun tonight!
We will! ||
See you tomorrow ||
|| See ya :)
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The restaurant was small; even though there were now only three other people besides them, Yesung was sure there had been a few more people earlier. Still, Yesung loved it. He was a regular, so he knew they served amazing food and the place was hidden enough that they wouldn’t be disturbed so much.
He didn’t know what time it was, but his body told him it was probably late. With one or two extra glasses of wine in his system, however, he didn’t seem to mind.
He looked around, seeing Kyuhyun and Siwon laughing at something nonsensical, and Donghae laughing along while he grabbed the last piece of meat on the grill.
“Yesungsung!” He suddenly heard from the door. When he turned around, he saw Heechul coming toward him with open arms, so he stood up to give him a big hug. “Happy birthdaaay!”
“Thanks, hyung. I was starting to think you wouldn’t make it.”
“I know, I’m sorry. Filming took way longer than I thought it would,” said Heechul as he sat down right in front of him him, beside Donghae. “But I told you I would come, so here I am.”
At that, Yesung smiled warmly. He was very grateful to have his members. Even if not all them had been able to make it, it didn’t matter. They’re all here in spirit, or at least that’s what his mother always used to say. Shindong was still recovering and Hyukjae had to take his place at one of his shows; Ryeowook was on a trip filming for a show and Leeteuk had to MC for god knows what. Kangin had called, Sungmin had sent him a little text, and even Zhoumi and Henry had wished him happy birthday. They’re all here. Always, he thought.
“Eunhyuk-ah didn’t come?” Heechul asked all of a sudden, making Yesung’s heart feel just a little bit heavier.
Yesung shook his head. “He couldn’t make it today. He had to stand in for Shindong, remember?”
“Well, that’s alright…” He said, picking up the empty wine bottle from the table and using it to point at Kyuhyun. “I know I can always count on drunkard Cho.”
Kyuhyun just laughed cheerfully and called the waiter to ask for a bottle of soju.
“Agh, you guys never change, do you?”, said Donghae.
In the meantime, while the others drank and laughed, Siwon took the maknae’s cell phone and kept on laughing by himself.
“What are you laughing at?”, asked Yesung popping his head over Siwon’s shoulder, but he only got roaring laughter as a response. He could see how Siwon kept passing picture after picture, laughing with some more than with others.
“During my live the other day I asked fans to send in memes and funny pictures of us, and now I have a folder full of them,” explained Kyuhyun after having another drink with Heechul.
“There are some of you, too, hyung,” said Siwon, finally scooting closer to Yesung and letting him see.
And so drink after drink, and picture after picture, they all started chiming in with their own comments until eventually the whole table was watching. The boys now simply couldn’t stop laughing. So when suddenly a picture of Yesung holding Hyukjae’s hand came on screen, the disgusted expression on his dongsaeng’s face only made all of them laugh again.
“I don’t know how you put up with him, hyung,” said Siwon in between laughs.
“Me neither. I would have killed him years ago,” said Kyuhyun while Donghae nodded along.
Yesung just smiled shyly, as he massaged the back of his neck. “To be honest, I don’t know either. Sometimes I really just want to punch him.”
“Oh, please. No, you don’t,” said Heechul rolling his eyes. “You’re too soft with Hyukjae and we all know that.”
Yesung’s face suddenly changed, almost offended by the accusation. “What are you talking about?”, he said. “We’re not Tom and Jerry for nothing! We’re fighting all the time!” Why do I sound so defensive about it, though? He wondered, quite surprised with himself.
“That’s different. It’s just bickering and messing around,” said Heechul. “You could just as easily behave like that with the girl you like.” Yesung hadn’t noticed it until that moment but the rest of the boys had long stopped laughing. “C’mon, Yesung. You haven’t been angry at Hyukjae a single day of your life.”
And so, Yesung tried to remember a moment when the two of them had really truly fought. There has to be one, he thought, but the more he searched back in his memory, the more he realized that Heechul was right.
It took him a few long seconds until he dared to meet his friend’s eyes again, who seemed to be waiting for him.
“So what?”, said Yesung, barely in a whisper.
“So nothing, hyung,” said Siwon reassuringly. “Heechul hyung is just messing with you.”
“What?! I’m just spitting facts over here!”, said Heechul, suddenly receiving a light slap from Donghae telling him to stop. So he sighed. “I’m sorry. I just meant that that’s why he acts that way with you. You’ve never shown him that you too have a limit.”
“But Yesung hyung doesn’t usually get angry, hyung. I’d even say that’s a good thing”, said Kyuhyun.
“It’s only a good thing until you guys take it too far!” Heechul now so fired up that it made everyone laugh. “As their hyungs, we have to set boundaries too, Yesung-ah.”
“You wouldn’t even have to get angry at him for real”, said Donghae as a joke. “You could always just pretend.”
But Siwon shook his head. “It wouldn’t work”, he said. “You all know Hyukjae. He’d just wait until Yesung hyung cools down again.”
Siwon had a point. Of all the times Hyukjae had actually had a serious fight with any of the members, he could count in one hand the few times he had actually decided to talk things out face to face. As a rule, his strategy to solve these things, usually consisted on waiting long enough for the other person to forget it and everything was well again.
“Well, let him ignore him then. After all, that brat only wants attention.”
“Oh”, said Donghae, quite excited. “That really would annoy him, hyung.”
However, Yesung on the other hand didn’t seem so convinced, as he still tried to picture the situation in his mind. “I don’t know…”
“Okay, that’s enough, guys”, said Siwon all of a sudden. “If he doesn’t want to do it, that’s fine.”
But Heechul huffed out a laugh. “He wouldn’t be able to pull it off even if he wanted to”, he said. “He’s too soft with him, I’m telling you.”
“Or maybe you’re just too harsh”, said Kyuhyun cheekily. “Maybe you could learn a thing or two from Yesung hyung.”
But Yesung wasn’t paying attention anymore; his eyes now fixed on the table. Even if he could have sworn he heard a loud thump followed by laughter, he just sat there, faking a smile as all the voices around him became silent. Is Heechul right?
And so, as he later closed his eyes that night, the question kept tumbling around in his head while his resigned heart seemed to scream the answer to someone who wasn’t yet ready to hear it.