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It was supposed to be a casual thing.
However, no matter how he looks at it there’s nothing casual about the way Moniwa is grinding into him right now.
A truly embarrassing sound escapes Sasaya as his head falls back, pressing into the pile of exercise mats they’ve misappropriated.
Or maybe they haven’t, depending on what counts as ‘exercise’. Now isn’t really the time to be thinking about this kind of thing anyway.
The unsightly water stain on the ceiling of the equipment room glares down at him as if aware of all the other things he’s trying not to think about.
Moniwa gently nips at the tender spot below his ear, making Sasaya buck his hips reflexively. He lingers briefly before pulling back to look at Sasaya. As he moves away, the brush of his curls tickles Sasaya's cheek.
Sasaya just barely stops himself from tightening his grip on the back of Moniwa's shirt to keep him close.
"What's going on?"
Even with his pupils blown wide and his brows knit together, Moniwa's eyes are as gentle as the hand curled around his hip bone.
It was supposed to be a casual thing.
There's nothing casual about the lump that's lodged itself in Sasaya's throat.
"We can stop if you want to."
Sasaya doesn't. Not ever. Therein lies the whole problem.
Moniwa sits back on his heels. Incidentally, he's moving in the exact opposite direction Sasaya wants him to.
Sasaya immediately misses having his warmth pressed against him. he draws back his arms and props himself up with a sigh.
"Sorry," he says, "Got a little caught up in my head, is all."
"The 'please, drag me out' kind of 'caught up in your head' or the 'leave me alone to brood' kind?"
The corner of Sasaya's mouth ticks up entirely without his say-so.
A lot words can be used to describe Moniwa Kaname. "Anxious" is one of them, "reliable" another, "determined" a third.
However, if pressed to pick just one Sasaya'd settle on "considerate".
The need to look out for the people around him is absolutely ingrained in Moniwa.
It shows in the way he keeps the second years in check around rival teams. It shows in the way he keeps Kamasaki out of trouble. It shows in the way he keeps the team together even when a match gets tough.
It’s showing now, in the way he’s giving Sasaya space without him having to ask for it.
It was supposed to be a casual thing.
If he wants to keep it that way, he ought to push Moniwa away right now before he gets in over his head.
Moniwa patiently awaits his answer, sitting between Sasaya’s thighs like he isn’t quite sure he belongs there.
He could, though, Sasaya thinks. In fact, he really wouldn’t mind if he did.
Sasaya swallows heavily and comes away with two kinds of realisation. One, something left his throat feeling unnaturally dry. Two, he’s been in over his head for a while already.
On some level, Sasaya wishes things were a bit more complicated. It’d give him an excuse to mull things over, to stall for time, find a reason to put off the inevitable.
However, things really aren’t all that complicated and Sasaya’s always prided himself on being a practical thinker.
It all comes down to a single question.
And the answer’s so very simple.
He chances a smile.
“The former,” he says easily and tilts his head in invitation.
Moniwa’s entire being seems to sag in relief. Despite being the one to suggest it, he blushes.
And just like that, the knot in Sasaya’s stomach unravels.
When Moniwa leans back in, Sasaya raises his arms to meet him half way. His fingers curl into the collar of Moniwa’s shirt. Moniwa lets himself be guided until his weight is keeping Sasaya to the mat once more.
Moniwa chases his mouth like a lifeline. Sasaya lets him steal his breath away because he himself doesn’t mind drowning anymore.
One of Moniwa’s hands comes up to brush aside the stubborn lock of hair Sasaya never quite manages to keep from hanging over his forehead. Sasaya surrenders a contented sigh to the kiss that fades into a groan when Moniwa’s other hand returns to massaging circles into his hip.
Sasaya locks his arm around Moniwa’s neck. Against his lips, he feels the corners of Moniwa’s mouth curl upwards in response.
This should have been a casual thing.
Sasaya’s really glad it isn’t.